18+ ~Just be friends~

[Shizuna]

Haha, well the title sucks, obviously, but I just couldn't come up with a better one.

A FAIR WARNING!! SEX-SCENES COMING IN THE FUTURE! DON'T READ IF YOU DON'T LIKE!

Hopefully you don't mind if I don't give you any kind of pointers in beforehand, because that would ruin the whole story, at least in my opinion.

So, let me start then ~

 

Just be friends

 

The beginning; My mizerable past

 

 

I let my gaze lay in the sight of my childhood town's buildings blurring away in my eyes due to the fast speed. My head was resting to the window, and my temples were starting to get achy from all the tremor. Not like I cared. I was too deep in my thoughts. `Back here again... it's been such a long time... Is it still just as laid back as it was here before?´

 

Part of me wanted to disappear or go below the ground, but another, bigger part of me, called courage or pride, whichever you want to call it, grabbed the sissy-me from neck and told it to pull itself together.

 

"It's been three years already. Don't be a coward Shinichirou." It said.

 

I tried to tell myself just the same. Even though my self-esteem had grown A LOT compared to what it was 3 years ago, I was still afraid to death to come back here.

 

"This is the place where it all begun." It was the whisper of my cowardice that I heard when my mother stopped the car in front of my old Junior high. That was also the place where my new high school was located at.

 

I almost chickened and lied to my mother that I had gotten a sudden stomachache, but my bravery saved me again. It kicked my cowardice's ass and pushed me to step out of the car. My feet were shaking slightly, but it stopped soon.

 

"I'm not the same sissy I was 3 years ago anymore." I reminded myself and then closed my eyes to go back to the time of 3 years ago....

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

A black hair that flowed down in front of my eyes, eyeglasses. Not even a hint of fashion. Unattractive geek. Well of course I had a pretty face, but really! Who could even get a sight of it when my hair was covering half of it, and I had those ugly glasses straight from sixties. That was me 3 years ago. Still I probably had the most handsome boyfriend in the whole world. (in my own and everyone else's mind as well)

 

Short, light hair, beautiful blue eyes, and mesmerizing, handsome face. That was Yamazaki Hiro, my childhood friend, best friend, first love, and finally... boyfriend. I loved him more than anything. Even my own family wasn't as important to me as Hiro.

 

I had known Hiro since kindergarten, and I had crushed on him on 5th grade. Of course I hadn't told that to him. His puberty had just started and he talked about nothing else but girls... I was sure that he would have freaked out if he had heard his best friend being a guy, and above all, into him. Or at least I thought so.

 

I'm sure I would have gotten over my crush and found someone else, probably a cute girl from a parallel class. We would have started dating, gotten our first kisses, and then would have come the break up. That's it. But no. No such a luck for me.

 

On 7th grade, when Hiro started smoking, and I got angry over it (not saying a word to him for a week), our relationship completely changed. Hiro tried to soften me up in every way, but nothing worked. I was angry as hell. I stayed quiet. Until.

 

One night, Hiro climbed up the ladders, to my window, and forced me to let him in. And when I did, I got kissed and told: "Shin, I love you." Of course all of my anger disappeared at that moment. Who could have been cruel enough to not forgive after something like that? Maybe I should have...

 

Well, we dated 11 months, 2 weeks and 4 days. (I'm really precise about these kind of things) It was definitely the best time of my life. Being with Hiro was easy as breathing, and even more important. My first time was also with him. It happened in the beginning of 8th grade. But...

 

In the end of 8th grade, the hell got spread into my life. One girl from our class confessed her love to Hiro, and after Hiro had turned her down, she made up (or well... made up and made up...) things about Hiro and me, claiming that we were dating etc. And actually, that was the exact truth... No-one just knew about it, except for me and Hiro. The girl was also just luckily guessing.

 

Well, In the end, people started to half believe it, because I was sticking into Hiro all the time. Now that I think about it afterward, maybe we were a bit too obvious..

 

Well anyways, Hiro's friends took him into a hearing. They asked him every kind of things, concerning our relationship, feelings, and well... Everything concerning me. Hiro tried to give round answers to everything, because he didn't want to deny the thing when I was in the other end of the corridor. He was trying his best to protect the both of us, and now when I think about it, the only thing he wanted to protect was his own image... Well, it just didn't work in the end; Teenagers can be really cruel when it comes to things like this..

 

Finally someone said bluntly:

 

"You're gay. Just admit it."

 

That's when Hiro's pride stepped in. The very next day he came to school hand in hand with Aiko, the girl who had started all the rumors about us. he said `morning´ to me just if like nothing had ever happened. I remember that day like it was yesterday. They hugged and kissed each other right in front of my eyes, but even that wasn't the worst part of it. The worst part was that I didn't feel angry but guilty. Me, who had gotten betrayed and cheated, was feeling GUILT!

 

I left in the middle of the day, went home, locked myself into my room and just cried my eyes off. Hiro came to our door later in the evening, but I told my mum to lie that I was out. Soon she brought me a tiny paper with a message from Hiro in it.

 

"It's better this way. For both of us.

I'm sorry.

~Hiro"

 

Fuck that! I didn't go to school after that. I just packed my things after 3 days, when I was able to move my limbs. I moved to my father's place, to Tokyo, and started going to school there. And that's when I started my series of restless nights full of tears and nightmares.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Now I had returned, and moved back to my mother and sister. I still hadn't gotten over the incident even after these years. Sometimes I still saw nightmares, though they were somewhat incomplete. The last time I had seen Hiro was 3 years ago, and he PROBABLY had changed and gotten manlier after that.

 

I had changed also. I wasn't the geek, which I definitely was when I left, anymore. I had got my hair cut and changed from glasses to contacts. My face and whole body had gotten manlier as well. Sunao's friends already formed a fan-club of mine... geez..

 

"Bye bye! Come home before it gets too late! And have a nice day!" Mom said to Sunao on me, probably more to me, before driving away. I followed the car with my eyes untill it turned from the next crossing, and went hidden behind the corner of a cafe. I wanted to give myself just a short moment before confronting the upcoming day.

 

"Shin! Come now!" Sunao shouted from the school gates, (she's fast isn't she?) and brought me back to earth. I was here now. Ready to break the bonds of my past, and start a new page in my life. This was what I had waited for so long.

 

"SHIN GODDAMMIT! IF YOU DON'T GET THAT SEXY, LAZY ASS OF YOURS HERE IN THREE SECONDS, I'LL MAKE SURE THAT YOU'LL BE LEFT WITHOUT THE ABILITY TO CONTINUE YOUR SPECIES!" Sunao's screaming made me shiver slightly, but then I started to laugh quietly. My sister had a really foul mouth. Not like I didn't curse at all myself, but Sunao just was the expert of that section.

 

As twins, we shared lots in common. Also in other than appearance. We both had black hair, though Sunao's was a lot longer and curlier. We both had the same big eyes and long eyelashes, and our lips were almost identical. We were very much alike, though Sunao was just shorter and more feminine. And also, if you couldn't tell by face, you would notice the difference by the time you got your hand into my trousers. Hopefully we weren't THAT much alike though... haha..

 

I walked to my sister in a fast speed. You didn't want to make her mad unless you wanted to be left without a guide inside the school, and get your eye (and everything that surrounded it) coloured in dark purple. Believe me, Sunao could give that to you even better than just well. If someone had felt it, then me. Last time was actually just 2 weeks ago when I had accidentally found her diary when looking for a pillow from her room: The color had stayed there for a week, and it still ached a bit when it got in touch with something.

 

"You sure dare to make me wait..." Sunao murmured in annoyed manner, but he wasn't the type to be unforgiving.

 

"Excited?" She asked just a few meters after that. (Yeah, counting the time from the distance...) My answer to her question was just a nervous, uttered laugh. `More afraid than excited´ I thought, but again the bravery (luckily) took the win over cowardice.

 

I followed my sister to the school corridors and noticed that I had actually started to relax slowly. I felt a lot lighter after I had introduced myself to the 2B -class, and recognized some of my old classmates. Everyone were amazed by the change I had gotten trough, and lots of people were also admiring it, mostly the girls. Not a bad start at all in my opinion.

[Shizuna]

Chapter 1 - Settling in

 

 

"Shin-san?" A cute voice called me from behind. It was my first name, and above all, my nickname! I turned my head to see, who in the earth was getting all that familiar with me suddenly.

 

Behind me stood a beautiful girl who had dressed up into expensive-looking clothes. Only a little red ribbon on her neck told me that she was on 1st grade in this high school. She had long curls and big, blue, foreigner eyes. My body shivered a bit because I couldn't help but think of someone else when I saw her. It didn't even take me one second to recognize the girl.

 

"Risa-chan!"

 

I stood up and grabbed the girl into a tight hug.

 

"When did you arrive?"

 

"About two weeks ago."

 

Angry gaze.

 

"And you didn't inform me?!"

 

"I wanted it to be a surprise." I explained, though it was a lie. In reality I hadn't even remembered her at all. I had only given thoughts to her big brother... Guilt throbbed my heart, but I "replaced" my lie with the fact that I was really happy about seeing her right now.

 

"Okay Shin-san. I'll forgive you, but just because I'm so happy to see you. You have no idea how much I missed you."

 

"Thank you Risa-chan~ I missed you too. A lot."

 

Risa's eyes squinted for a moment, but then she bursted into a lovely giggle and hugged me. This time I was well aware of the murderous glares that were directed towards her.

 

~~~~~~~~

 

"You have grown up a lot. You've become so beautiful." I said, staring at Risa's grown up, feminine face. We were in the school cafeteria, alone. We had already sat here an hour straight. As the principal's daughter, Risa had many advantages inside the school. She had just said a few words to the teacher, and I had been freed from the English lesson.

 

Other pupils already started to flow in, since it was lunch time. I gazed at them, afraid of what I would see, and almost missed Risa's blush. She lowered her head with a shy smile brushing her tiny lips.

 

"Shin-san... You're just teasing me."

 

I uttered a laugh and smiled gently.

 

"I'm not. I really meant what I said. You've become a very beautiful young woman. Especially your eyes."

 

"Really?" The disbelief in her voice made me almost laugh. Just almost.

 

"Really."

 

New blush colored her face just when she had gotten rid of the last one. But this time she didn't turn her eyes away. She looked me in the eyes and thanked. I smiled and took a sip of my lemonade, but Risa didn't let my thoughts trail away.

 

"You too." She said, and I missed the meaning of it.

 

"Excuse me?"

 

"You've become very good looking. I almost couldn't tell it was you back there. I personally think that you're even more beautiful than I am."

 

Now it was my turn to turn all red like a tomato. That had came behind a tree. A total surprise. I almost spit out my lemonade, but gladly I was able to swallow it before it got spread around the table and Risa's face.

 

"Hey! Not fair! You shouldn't tease me like that!" I said, coughing wildly.

 

"I'm not teasing you, I swear. I think that you're even more beautiful than mom." Risa said, and the gentle, innocent smile on her lips didn't lie.

 

I stayed quiet for a moment. Risa's mother had been a famous American actress, beautiful like a goddess. But she had died in a car crash when Sunao had been only 10 years old. I could remember that time very well because it was the first time his big brother cried in front of me. That boy had looked like an angel to me, and that's also when I fell in love. That bastard...

 

I was brought back to earth when a tray was set to the table next to me.

 

"Hi." Asano Takeshi murmured, and sat down. I bursted into laughter.

 

"What.... happened... to your face?" I asked between the laughs. Takeshi's face was dirtied with black stripes and other figures. He looked extremely hilarious with that annoyed expression on his painted face. Takeshi was one of the few people who I had been friends with from childhood to this day. We had even kept in touch during my Tokyo-living. He was probably my best friend after... him.

 

"Nakamura got his hands on a permanent marker..." Another voice said from my other side, and Nakao Yuri placed her tray next to me as well. She was a new comrade, a beautiful girl with a good equipment below her collarbones. Takeshi's girlfriend. Sadly. Haha, just joking. She was nice, but not my type. She had breasts.

 

The person whose name was mentioned, Nakamura Yuu sat to the table, next to Risa, and laughed. He was also one of my old classmates. I could remember him always being the class clown. Yeah, he was a good guy.

 

"Clearly artist-material." I said, giving a quick glance at Takeshi's face, and then laughing loudly again. This time the others joined my laugh. Everyone else except Takeshi.

 

After Yuu, came Aizawa Nana. She was Yuri's best friend, and Yuu's childhood friend. She was just as beautiful as Yuri, and even more voluptuous. She had given me extra-attention since this morning, and glared at Risa in a pretty angry manner before. That's why now, when the only free place in the table, was next to Risa, she sat down, showing a sulky face. Thought she still remembered to flash me that shiny line of teeth of hers. Even if I had thought of her as vainglorious at first, she was a really good person when you got to know her.

 

"Yuu gets nothing else done but annulment." Nana said, rolling her eyes. They had known each other since childhood, and even though they had the very opposites of natures and interests, they still were really close. Maybe that's why she had convinced me very eagerly that there was nothing going on between her and Yuu.

 

"Well ouch?" Yuu cried out, and Risa started giggling. Everyone else quieted down.

 

"Erm... This is Yamazaki Risa, my very good childhood friend. And Risa, here are Asano Takeshi, Nakao Yuri, Nakamura Yuu and Aizawa Nana." I tried to save the situation before it went too awkward.

 

Risa, in her normal, bright manner, said `hi´ ti everyone and then flashed a lovely smile. Everyone were immediately like smelt wax in her hands. Except for Nana. She looked at me so sadly that I felt bad for her. She had clearly understood something wrong about me and Risa, and even though I didn't have to, I still wanted to correct her beliefs.

 

I bent over the table, to Nana's ear, and whispered huskily:

 

"Did you know that if you continue staring at me with those beautiful eyes of yours, I might get captivated for the rest of my life? It might get dangerous."

 

Nana's cheeks went red, and she looked at me with a flattered smile on her lips. Others looked at us in confusion, and Takeshi even asked about it when the next class started.

 

"What did you say to Nana? I've never seen her blush like that."

 

"Se-ku-ret-to!" Was my answer.

 

 

Haaah~ I was supposed to have an idea to this `cafeteria-scene´, but I decided that it's too early. In the next chapter then~ (;

Also, Shinichirou isn't as shy and innocent as I thought at first. Seems like the character is making up his own traits lol.

[Shizuna]

Chapter 2 - The reunion

 

 

"What do we have nect?" I asked after the 4th class had ended. We were walking on the school corridors with Takeshi and Yuuand it seemed like I was the only one with no idea about our destination.

 

"PE."

 

"Basketball."

 

They both gave me the answer I didn't exactly want to hear. I wasn't too interested in PE, even though I liked jogging and walking... alone, on my free time. And when it came to basketball... Well, my coordination abilities sucked, and my height.. Let's just put it bluntly. I. Suck.

 

"Don't worry. No-one is forced to play. You can sit and watch as we play." Yuu said without even taking a look at me. My eyes got slightly bigger. Was he a mind reader or what? Well no matter how he did it, but he surely gave me a reason to relax. He really was a good guy. Maybe even nicer than I had thought.

 

I grabbed the door knob, of the locker room, when someone suddenly pulled it open from the other side. I was shot to front, and it was a straight crash.

 

"Oh! I'm so sorry!" I apologized immediately, without even looking at the person I had bumbed onto, but when I raised my gaze (yeah, the guy was pretty much taller than me) I totally froze. I tried to breath, but my veins didn't accept any of the air I tried to inhale, nor did they let any air out, when I tried to exhale. My veins were totally stoned, like my whole body. I suddenly felt sick, like vomiting.

 

`Hiro´. The name was thrown against my face like a bucket of cold water, except this one wasn't just icy cold. It also hurt like hell.

 

My ex best friend and -boyfriend. My nightmare that had lasted for 3 years, was now standing here, right in front of me, at least 10 times more handsome than the last time I saw him. All the courage I had collected during these years (all of it just to confront him) was now shattered into tiny pieces. The wounds inside my chest got ripped open.

 

I swallowed noisily and stared at Hiro with expanded eyes, waiting for the recognizing look to take over his eyes, and just stayed quiet from all the frighten. It just never came. Instead, I got a pat on my shoulder.

 

"No worries. It was my fault. Sorry." Hiro said, flashing me a quick smile, and then he just coldly walked past me, leaving me there, dumbfounded. After him came Kazuoka Tamaki, one of my old classmates as well, and he didn't show any signs of recognization either.

 

`No way... Can this be true? He.. he didn't recognize me! It's been only 3 years, and he had already completely forgotten me..? This isn't real...

´

Thoughts ran wild inside my head, and suddenly I felt like crying. How come that Hiro hadn't recognized me, his childhood friend, and ex boyfriend? How come he had forgotten about me like that? I felt betrayed.

 

"Hey! Move already!" Someone shouted behind me, and when I turned around, I saw a line of guys who were all trying to get past me, to the locker room. Yuu stared at me somewhat askingly, ans Takeshi dressed both of their confusements into words:

 

"Are you alright?"

 

"Y..yeah. Umm... I really have to go to the bathroom." I murmured, and quickly ran past the line. Someone in the line sighed in relief:

 

"Finally..."

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

"Hey, what happened?" Yuu asked from me when he came to the player's bench from the playing field. I had just came back from the bathroom, and the game was already on.

 

"Mm, nothing. I just felt like my bladder was going to explode." I made up, hoping that Yuu would laugh, or at least swallow up my explanation.

 

"Ah, okay."

 

I felt bad for lying, but there was no way that I could have told the truth about me and Hiro to anyone. It was a secret. It had always been, and it would always be, with no exceptions.

 

"Takaomi-kun, why don't you join the game?" The PE-teacher, who had suddenly appeared to my right side, asked. I almost jumped to the ceiling and cursed a few times for being surprised, but I managed to restrain myself.

 

"Ahhah... I'm not so brilliant in basketball, and I'm not feeling too well either." I answered. Shit. Already the third lie today.. I'm really not a too honest person anymore...

 

"Oh, I understand. Just sit here and watch." Teacher said, smiling.

 

"Thank you sensei."

 

I sat down to the player's bench, and started following the game somewhat absent mindedly. I really wasn't too much interested in it, and also, I didn't want to see that bastard's face right now. How did he dare to forget me, when I had been suffering pain because of him for all these years?!

 

"It's Hiro, isn't it?" I'm not sure if I heard Yuu's words right, because I didn't get the chance to ask him to repeat. He was called back to the game. I could just stare at him with wide eyes and shocked thoughts, and hope that I had heard it wrong. But it wasn't like that. Yuu obviously knew something about me and Hiro, that he wasn't supposed to know. No-one was supposed to know about what happened in the past.

 

 

~~~~~~~~

 

 

I was sitting on the floor, leaning to the wall next to the locker room's door. I was waiting for Yuu and Takeshi to come out from there, because I really needed to talk with Yuu. What did he know, and where had he heard about it? That's also the moment I remembered that Sunao had promised to pick me up so that we could go home together. I stood up, and just then Sunao popped up to the gym.

 

"Shin! I waited for you in front of your class! You should have told me that you had PE!" My sister shouted, and right after that, a loud gasping-sound was produced behind me. It sounded like someone had got hit hard to stomach, and forcefully blowed all of their breath out from their veins. When I turned around, I saw a familiar pair of bright, sky blue eyes staring at me with a shaken look in them.

 

"Shin?" Hiro was able to whisper between his stoned lips.

 

I'm sorry about the shitty writing, and I'll try to come back here in the future, and write everything again, but just now I just want to rush forward with my story.. (:

 

I hope that you'll forgive me for not writing as carefully as I could..