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Hurry Up and Love Me


Lil'YaoiNeko
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ryan was walking down the school hallway avoiding eye contact with any of his male peers. he didnt like the looks he got from them, it was kind of amimalistic. his cat tail swished gently as he silently traveled with a small trot almost. it was rather weird for him to be so scared....but after the sexual abuse he suffered yesterday....he was practically terrified. what was he supposed to do, all of his peers of both gender looked at him like a toy. he shuddered violently

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Joakim, otherwise known as Aki, walked through the hallways. He stopped, putting his arms around the waist of a short brunette boy who was at his locker, kissing his neck, his new arm candy. The boy's name was Nico, and Aki couldn't care less about him, all he cared about was the sex. That's all he ever cared about.

 

"Aki, stop~" Nico giggled flirtatiously, squirming in the other's arms. Aki smirked, putting his arm on the locker next to Nico's, looking down on him with narrow, brown eyes. Aki was 6'5, and toward over most kids in school, yet for some reason, he always dated those shorter, much shorter, than him.

 

"You're gonna be late to geometry," Aki said, in his deep, raspy voice. Based on his voice and appearance, no one could ever tell he was but a high school senior.

 

Nico smiled up at Aki, kissing him gently. Aki added more tongue into it. "Get to class," he said sternly, smiling against the other's lips.

 

Nico nodded eagerly, closing his locker, and hurrying off to first period. Aki sighed, he was so sick of this relationship, it had only been going on for a month and he was already bored. He walked towards his own locker, in the senior's hallway, grabbed his books, and headed to calculus.

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ryan happened to pass the other in the hallway and he just softly hissed at aki before continueing down to his writing class. that aki, such a playboy, he would even bet that the only reason he's still with nico is because hes good in bed. what an ass. ryan disliked these kinds of people, they were the ones always useing him like he was a toy. he just wanted to shoot himsself in the head. his tail dropped and wrapped around his black short shorts which framed his slim figure perfectly. he also wore a white tank top with a black cropped jacket on top.

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As Aki walked through the halls, a relatively short, slightly chunky girl, with half shaved electric blue hair, many piercings, and torn up, black, punk rock clothing hurried to catch up with him. "Wrist check!" she yelled.

 

The girl was Regina, also known as Reggie, Aki's best friend. She was the only person that knew what Aki's father had done to him for so many years, and was the only person that Aki ever trusted. He confided everything in her, and she worried about him, understanding exactly where she was coming from. Regina was openly gay, and even made a joke out of it at school, proud to be a lesbian, and laughing at any gay jokes coming her way, as students at their school were not as accepting of gay women as they were of gay men. Aki, however, knew what really went on, at her home, with her stepfather. The two needed each other, and no matter how strictly platonic their relationship was, they were all the other had.

 

"Really?" Aki asked. "I thought we were over this."

 

Regina shook her head. "Not after what happened last night. Did you do anything?"

 

Aki didn't answer.

 

"JOAKIM AALEKSANDR KEKKONEN," Regina said loudly, snapping her fingers in Aki's face.

 

"No," Aki answered, a bit too late.

 

Regina sighed, she knew that he had sliced his arm up beyond recognition. He was wearing the oversized black jacket that he always wore whenever he did, the cuts were too tender for any other long sleeves. "I don't get it, you don't live there anymore, how does he keep showing up?" she asked.

 

Aki shrugged, but he knew the exact kind of person his dad was, and that he would do anything just to hurt someone. He probably beat mom until she told him where I was, he thought, as the duo entered the calculus classroom.

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ryan didnt do too much in his writing class other then stare out the window. he was going to go to his only friends house tonight and sleep there. he didnt wanna go home where he knew someone was waiting to harrass him. he completely avoided going home as much as he could, he honestly didnt like it there. night after night he was abused and tormented. he just stopped going home, what was 'home'? he didnt even know anymore

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Aki just bared through all of his classes, until the very end of the day, when the bell rung, dismissing all students. He waited outside of the 10th grade history class with Regina, like they always did, for Aki's younger sister Karin.

 

The thin blonde girl left the classroom, joining the duo. Her eyeliner ran down her face, and her cheeks were red. "Karin, what happened?" Aki asked, holding the girl's shoulders and kneeling slightly to get a better look at her face.

 

"Leave me alone," the blonde sniffed, wiping her nose with her sleeve.

 

Aki sighed, he wished his sister would just tell him whenever something happened, she had been just about 24/7 now. He wrapped his arm around her, and he lead her out of school, and into the back seat of his broken down, black car.

 

Regina got in the passenger's seat, many cigarettes butts and empty bottles of alcohol fell out when she opened the door. She ignored it, leaving the drinks and drugs on the parking lot, as Aki drove off. Loud punk rock music came from his car.

 

As he was driving, he couldn't help but think about Ryan. He wondered where it all went wrong. They used to be such good friends, better than him and Regina even... But not anymore. Every time he saw Ryan, he couldn't help but want to know, what had happened all the years they hadn't been friends. He had heard rumours that Ryan was promiscuous, some even as bad as calling him a slut, all of which disturbed Aki, and actually sent a twinge of rage up his spine. He still cared about Ryan, even if it was clear that Ryan hated what Aki had become. Aki didn't know why he was the way he was, Regina blamed it on the past sexual abuse from his father, which really started it all, it was once that started happening when he started ignoring Ryan. He sighed, looking out the window as he drove, why did life have to be so goddamn hard?

 

He pulled a cigarette out of the console and lit it, inhaling the smoke and nicotine, rolling the window down so it wouldn't disturb Karin, who cried in the back seat.

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ryan was also leaving school, he saw karin and aki get into a car with another person he didn't know. he thought about maybe contacting karin since she was usually nice to him, and at least she still acknowledged him and said 'hi' sometimes. he grumbled as he approched a cross walk, he had the right away since it was a red light, but as he drew across the street he suddenly heard the car horn of a car. he panic and imeadeatly threw himself into a front flip, he was part cat, so ofcourse he could easily do this. as he slowly landed on the other side of the road he got a glance at the window. he hissed in rage as he reconized the face of the driver, then he turned to continue on to his friends house.

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"Aki... Why is everyone so terrible to that Ryan boy?" Karin asked softly from the backseat.

 

Aki opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out. What was he supposed to say? Some people are just like that? He knew it wouldn't satisfy her question, and he knew it would raise further questions, about him really loving Nico, and why he is never with a person more than 2 months... "I don't know, Karin," Aki said softly.

 

"It's not fair, he doesn't deserve that..." Karin said softly to herself, Aki knew she was right, nobody deserved that. "Maybe we should invite him over, I see him going to different places everyday anyways," she said.

 

"I don't think that's such a good idea..." Aki said softly. He knew what Ryan thought of him, how disgusted he was by guys like Aki, and how he probably wouldn't even trust Aki enough to be around him, even if there were two other girls.

 

"I'm gonna talk to him tomorrow," Karin said. "He needs help. It just makes me so sad to see this kind of stuff happen to him. It reminds me... of..." She choked on those words, as the tears started up again.

 

"It reminds you of dad, doesn't it?" Aki asked, looking at the girl in the rear view mirror.

 

Karin sniffed and nodded, rubbing her eyes.

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it had begun to rain and ryan had somehow ended up infront of his own house. he stood there with softly dead eyes as his ears flattened to his head and his tail drooped. why....why did he end up here? the place where he was used the same way every night, the pain the agony, the digusting pants of the abuser. ryan looked up at the sky as the rain fell against his face, wiping away every tear he was dieing to scream out.

 

walking up the stairs to his house the front door opened automaticly for him, and standing there was exactly who he knew would be there. one of his middle school teachers, the teacher held the door open and angerly pulled ryan inside, into another painful and killing night....

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"We... We should go check up on him," Karin said softly. "Do you still remember how to get to his house?"

 

Aki nodded, changing directions. He remembered, all right. He also remembered in elementary school, when they were just kids, and Aki used to go over to his house, which used to be such a happy place, and the two would laugh and play. He sighed, trying to push those thoughts out of his head.

 

He pulled into Ryan's house, parking the car. He wasn't going to get out, and Karin knew this. She got out of the backseat, closing the door behind her, and she slowly walked up to Ryan's front door, gingerly opening it. Aki watched from the car, he felt like something bad was going to happen to his sister. "Go with her," he said to Regina, who nodded, stepping out of the car, and running up to Karin, who stood in the doorway.

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there were sounds heard from inside, the strangled voice of ryan gasping out for air and a moment of rest while the other did as he pleased with the boy. the disgusting sounds of the older man were loud and hearable just as disribed earlier, the sounds got out do to an open window that ryan had pushed open in an attempt to run away. the ryan being used right now was the same ryan that everyone called a 'slut' he hated that name, he wasnt! he would argue over and over with tears in his eyes and yet the others would torment him. this was his hell on earth, his spot in hell, the thing that tied him to the darkness, all the bruises.

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Karin gasped, covering her mouth and stepping back, she felt like she might faint. Regina scowled, rolling up her sleeves and stomping into the room. "Who the hell do you think you are?!" she yelled, grabbing the older man by the shoulder, pulling him off of Ryan, and punching him in the nose.

 

Aki heard the noises coming from the window and cringed, he didn't care if Ryan hated him and everything about him, he couldn't just sit there and let this happen. He slammed the car door shut, running into the house. He took the older man from Regina, pushing him onto the ground, and sitting on his chest, repeatedly punching him in the face.

 

"Are you okay?" Regina asked Ryan, putting an arm around him, and leading him to sit on the couch, while Aki continued to punch the older man.

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ryan froze, everything happened so fast. he tried to regain his breath and take in what had happened, but somehow he couldnt do it. he continued to cough until small spots of blood landed on his carpet, he grabbed his clothes that had been thrown somewhere else and then he silently put them on then stood there. this was a whole different side of ryans life, the obvious marks on his neck, the cuts on his face, the briuses on his sides. "why are you three here...?" he asked softly slightly weezing

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"Karin wanted to come check on you, she's really worried about you," the blue haired punk rock girl said softly, revealing a gentler side that only the Kekkonen siblings had seen. "Aki is too."

 

Aki stood up, he was sure that he had killed the older man, and decided that there was no reason to punching a dead body, no matter how angry he was. He didn't look at Ryan, he couldn't, he knew how much Ryan despised him, and he just wanted to get out as soon as possible.

 

Karin timidly entered the room. "Ryan... You... you can stay with us tonight... I-if you want..." she said softly.

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"no thanks." ryan got a twisted almost psychotic smile on his face. "i'm going to stay here and bluntly butcher this man until my ears and tail are drenched in red. after the hell i've lived in....you guys dont get it." he glared over to aki. "how many months have you been dating nico? almost two months, you gonna ditch him soon? gonna go out and find someone else to play with? i know you far to well. i know what your involved with, i know who you are, i freaking know what you are.....!" he shouted this time he sounded mad and hurt like he was shouting things he always wanted to say. "YOURE A BACKSTABBING, IDIOTIC, DRUG INHALING, AS$HOLE!" he spat and then fell over to his side and passed out while tears fell down his face. out of his pocket fel a picture of aki and him back in elementry school, back before aki went totaly wrong. they were both smiling, something that nether would truely do again. it landed by karins feet and ryan slipped away into the depths of unchonchessness

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Aki sighed, it didn't bother him what Ryan had just said, it bothered him that it was all true. Karin picked up the photo looking at it, as tears welled in her eyes. She put it in her purse. "Take him," she said softly.

 

Aki lifted Ryan with ease, then brought him to the car, setting him in the backseat, putting the seatbelt around the other. Karin got in the other side, and the two older ones got in the front, as Aki drove to his house, a broken down apartment. He picked up Ryan again, carrying him up the stairs and to the front door, laying him on the couch. Karin sat next to him, setting his head on her lap, as Aki went into his room, closing and locking the door. She sighed, deciding she would tell Ryan exactly why Aki had turned into this.

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ryan was out for maybe an hour or so before his eyes slowly opened. he sat up slowly and looked around, begining to wonder where he was. he turned around to see karin and then it all came back to him. he twitched and then scooted away. what was he supposed to do? they all had walked in on something he was hoping wouldnt get out, ryan really hoped the teacher was dead, or else they'd all be in trouble.

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"Ryan, before you say anything, let me explain," Karin said. "I know you and my brother used to be very close. I watched you play when we were kids. And I know you hate what he's become, I can't say I like it either. But you don't know why this has happened..." Karin took a breath in. "When you two were friends, we lived only with our mom. The summer between 5th grade and 6th grade for Aki, 3rd and 4th grade for us, our dad returned from overseas. At first, we were really happy, daddy was back. But then... The war changed him, Ryan. It started with drinking, which turned to screaming, which turned to hitting, which turned to raping. It happened to me, Aki, and our other sister, Elisa. It messed her up so badly, that she was sent to an asylum. I became anti-social and emotional. And Aki started doing drugs and sleeping around. Many times, I asked him why, why he did that, why he was acting like our father... He never answered me. But I know why. He still feels dirty. And how can you not? His own father molested him. It didn't stop until he started high school, and our dad went back overseas. This year, our dad is back, and Aki moved out and took me with him as soon as he arrived. But you have to understand, Ryan... Aki is not this way because he wants to be. Every night, I hear him crying. He mutilates himself, his arms look like they've been stuck down a garbage disposal, and multiple times he has tried to kill himself. He numbs himself with the drugs and the sex. I guess... I guess he just felt like his life was wasted the instant he was penetrated. And every other time after that has just been a reminder, like our dad telling him, 'I own you, you will never amount to anything, you are worthless.' He told me that the reason he started ignoring you, was because he couldn't bare to look at anyone he knew. To him, everything was contaminated. He didn't tell anyone about our father until Regina arrived, and they became close friends. Every day it kills him, Ryan. He's not a monster. Our dad was."

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ryan looked away, he didnt like the sound of this, he hated it so much.he hated the fact that aki hadnt told him anything, upset that he turned to what he has turned to, ryan hated this aki. this aki wasn't his, his would have never done drugs, or drak, or became the damn school pimp....they used to be friends! they started food fights on purpose, did each others homework for thier worst subject, and occasionally fought together,what were they doing now...? ryan tugged violently at his tail, intentionally trying to make it hurt. aki was doing drugs, drinking, smoking, turning into a pimp....and ryan? he was only junior and he was going to drop out of school! he cant go anymore after tommorow, he couldnt take it anymore. he looked back at karin. "that warpped thing in there isnt aki...." ryan said pulling his knees to his chest and tearing up. "my aki was stronger then this, he'd never stoop this low. he would tell me everything, he would be there, he wouldnt be doing anything wrong......my aki is gone damn it..." he punched the couch violently screaming 'damn it'

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Karin rubbed Ryan's back comfortingly. "Deep down, he is still the same Aki," she said. "He just got lost along the way. But you can't blame him, Ryan. The one person that was supposed to be there for him completely turned on him. He was betrayed. You don't see how he acts outside of school. He's the best brother ever, countless times he has taken a beating so Elisa and I wouldn't have to. I know he can change... He just needs a reason to care."

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"well good luck finding him one." he said bitterly as he removed him self from karins reach and started tords the door. "someone from his past cant change his future, i learned that when my parents kicked me out...." ryan glanced back. "because i killed someone" he said before walking out of the house and moving to the roof where he sat in the slightly less vicious rain and let his hair get plastered to his face. thats right he killed a man,a teacher from the highschool to be infact. he did it because she refused to listen to his pleas about his harrasment. so he held her at gun point one night and made her commit suicide .

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Karin sighed, why wouldn't Ryan listen to her? Aki was still in his room, Karin knew he was in there mutilating himself. She walked outside, and looked up at Ryan on the roof, squinting as the rain poked her eyes. "Please, listen to me, Ryan!" she sobbed. "Aki cares for you so much! And I know you care for him too!" She grabbed the picture of the two from her purse and held it up so Ryan could see. "This doesn't just go away! It can't! You two need each other, and you need to reconcile!" She looked down. "When we were kids... Aki told me that he was going to marry you one day. I didn't think he was serious, but... He still talks about it."

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ryan was already in tears and covering his face. "i know....! i knew that! i just......i cant help him! im just as weak as he is! ten times weaker actually, what...wat the hell o you want me to day karin?!" he shouted in frustration. he dissapeared onto the other side of hte roof and looked into aki's room. when he saw the other he frustratedly punched the roof.

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Aki grabbed a knife off the nightstand, violently mutating what was left off his arm. "FUCK YOU!!!!" he screamed at the flesh. He hated himself, he hated what he did to people. Blood flew everywhere, on his face, on the walls, on his clothes, as he destroyed his arms, beyond recognition. The blood was pouring out, as his body hit the floor, passing out from lack of blood.

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ryan opened aki's window and easily jumpped in and closed it behind him. her ran over to aki's body and imedeatly set off to take care of the wounds. after maybe twenty minutes, ryan finished wrapping aki's arm and then stared at him with half saddened eyes. he didnt want to lose aki, if there was even some of the same aki left, he would save what he could with his weak nature. he wasnt going to lose aki again, he drew his aattention to the blood on aki's face. his eye twitched slightly and he hissed at the red color beore softly licking it off of aki's face like aa cat.

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