18+ Kuroshitsuji yaoi ~ His Butler, Fraustrated (Sebastian x Ciel)

[Nyuchanxx]

wow sorry everyone for the really late upload, it took me a while to write this and check it through but i think i am happy with it. As guess i have already warned you but unfortunately this is the last chapter, really sad to be finishing it but all good things must come to an end T.T anyway ill let you all read...please enjoy!

 

 

 

 

His butler instincts kicking in he immediately leapt up in an attempt to stop his master crying. This wasn’t meant to happen, none of this was meant to happen and now his master was crying because he did not understand. However no sooner had Sebastian jumped from the bed to comfort his master did he topple over onto the hard floor once again as his weakened muscles gave out from under him. He groaned, clenching his teeth together as he suppressed anything louder as the fireery inferno of pain shot through his arm, scorching its muscle and flesh yet leaving no trace of a mark to show the agony of his wounds. Through the pain Sebastian’s mind suddenly began to clear, no this was not meant to happen, no he hadn’t wanted this to happen, yes, he had made a terrible mistake. But it had happened and now it was his job to fix the problem he had started in the first place. Who would have thought that a night of being sexually frustrated would have lead to a situation like this he thought cynically as he stood opening his eyes against the pain and sat gently back in the bed, pulling his master to him and holding him close, Ciel's head resting on his uncovered chest as he sat upright debating the best cause of action from this point onwards.

 

 

 

His eyes stared unseeing out the window and into the dark night sky as he contemplated his available moves, or if he was in fact in checkmate.

 

 

 

Ciel's soft hair moved gently across his skin as the younger male slowly stopped crying and the room fell silent, neither person knowing what it was they wanted to say. Finally Sebastian shifted, lifting Ciel’s chin with his unharmed arm he asked softly “Ciel, what do you think of me?” It was a very broad question, the demon wanted to know how his master would interpret the question more than he actually wanted to know the answer. He kept the others chin locked in his grip as he stared into the man’s eyes not allowing him to look away, he need to put Ciel on the spot right now, he needed a honest answer and from all their years together he knew this was the best way to do it.

 

He sat and watched as he saw the others expression slowly change from a frown of confusion to contemplation and finally he saw as his master finally came up with an answer. Ever so quietly, only loud enough for the demons enhanced hearing to pick up even from their close proximity to each other Ciel whispered “You are my butler, but also my friend, ally, enemy and annoyance all at the same time, so tell me Sebastian what are you to me?” Ciel's response was so unexpected that Sebastian let out a small laugh, sometime his young master could be so insightful, and to answer a demons question with another question was so typical of the male. Up until this point Sebastian hadn’t known whether he should lie or tell Ciel the truth but in that one instant, that one simple statement the other made he knew what to say.

 

 

 

He sidestepped the one question and yet he was sure whatever happened Ciel would discover how he felt eventually even if it came from May Rinn's mouth and not his own.

 

 

 

Working up his courage Sebastian took a deep breath and slowly started to speak “Ciel, the moment you saw my wings our contract was breached, you are free from the shackles that bound your soul to me but me, well that’s another story, I am now bound by those same shackles to the human world, I can either live like those low life demons who William despises so much and then I really shall be the object of his hatred, or I could live as a human, lose nearly all my powers and my life shall one day end, just as yours shall.” He paused for a moment to let it all sink in. Only now releasing the males face from his strong and yet gently grip he stood, all pain now gone as his body began to rush to heal itself in preparation for what was to come. He walked over to the window his back to Ciel as he stared into the unending sky: if there is one thing that is certain in this life, it is that all things must end, all life, all hope, all sorrow and all happiness, they will all end at some point and he was no exception to the rule.

 

 

 

His hands clasped behind his back Sebastian didn’t turn around as he continued what he was saying “Of course my choice is obvious and final. I will not become a low life feeding off pathetic souls that wish to give up all hope for the rest of my days until some overconfident and outspoken Shinigami comes along to kill me in my weakened state. No. I shall become human. It is the only logical course of action. The only thing that remains... is what you think.” Sebastian turned to face Ciel. The side of his perfectly sculpted face was illuminated by the moons rays as they shone through the windows casting shadows around the room that danced and flickered along with the candle light. “The only thing that remains, is where do you want to go from here.” He emphasised before striding out the room and shutting the door behind him. Leaving Ciel to ponder on his thoughts

 

 

 

He leant against the door sighing, he had finally said it and now he could do nothing but wait, he would let his master... no, Ciel, he was no longer his master, he would let Ciel think on the matter for the night and tomorrow morning for the last time he would bring the male his tea and breakfast in bed.

 

 

 

**

 

Ciel sat numb on the bed. He didn’t know what to think, what to do or how to react. This was all very new to him, he didn’t even realise a contract could be voided and certainly not buy something as simple as this but he guessed all things had to end eventually but he didn’t want to lose his butler or his friend. How could he accept something like that so easily? Sebastian had been the one that was always there for him without fail and the one that had kept him in line when he had over stepped his mark. There were more times than he could count that the demon had saved his skin and he hadn’t even given so much as a thanks for it all. He sighed, it was too much to take in and he didn’t know how he was expected to sleep with all this suddenly being unloaded onto him but apparently that was what he was expected to do. Yet another expectation of him, why did everyone have to ask the impossible of him? How was he supposed to make these life changing decisions, assumptions, orders? He was hardly old enough for it so why was he trusted with them? Before he had always had his faithful servants to help him, but not this time, this time it was all down to him and he didn’t even know what was expected of him. What did Sebastian want him to say?

 

 

 

He sighed groaning as he flopped sideways onto the bed sheets, a part of him, the more instinctive part of him wanted to go to his butler and see if he was ok, Sebastian might be a demon but he was still in a very bad way earlier and if what he said was true very shortly he would be human and prone to death. But the other part of him told him he should stay as Sebastian wished him to, he should stay and think everything over, after all he figured he would have to have a response by the morning and right now he wasn’t doing a very good job of thinking. Resigning himself to a very long night of fitful sleep Ciel curled up on top of the blankets and shut his eyes falling into a fitful sleep where monsters roamed and attacked him as he called out for his faithful butler and yet...nobody came. Sebastian’s ever faithful face did not appear before him.

 

**

 

When morning finally came Sebastian was still sitting on his bed in exactly the same position he had when he first entered his bedroom. He turned his head wincing slightly. The lack of movement over the course of the night may have saved him some pain at the time but now he was paying for it even more, his cramped muscles needed to stretch and it caused him a lot of pain as he stood allowing his limbs to fall limply by his side. He groaned resenting the entire world. Why did it have to be like this anyway? He shook his head vigorously trying to rid himself of those thought, if there was one thing he had learnt over his long years it was that regret never helped anybody only hindered their advance in this life, so he would not regret anything, only learn from his mistakes.

 

 

 

Walking out the room, his clothes still ruffled and creased he wandered into the empty kitchen to prepare a breakfast for his lord. None of the other servants appeared to be up yet, a peacefulness he was grateful for. (and he was grateful for the peace it brought.) He prepared the tea and some waffles with syrup in silence feeling numb inside. Was he being brave allowing Ciel to make the final decision as to his fate or was it weak? Was he just running away from the responsibility? It didn’t matter really; it was all leading to a single final outcome, an inevitable outcome: death. What happened between then and now was a mere distraction.

 

 

 

He walked out the kitchen leaving the door wide open, today it didn’t matter after all he was only a servant for another hour or so more. Not long enough for him to return to this room again. With deliberate slow and heavy steps he walked up to the oak door of Ciel’s bedroom raising his hand to knock he heard May Rinn's voice in his mind “who are you Sebastian...no. What are you?!" he wondered on the question for a while before sighing and walking into the room after knocking gently. Ciel sat on the bed, bags were under his eyes and it looked as if he had hardly slept. Sebastian understood. After all, he hadn’t either. The young man looked up at him with big sad eyes that drove deep into Sebastian's consciousness. He couldn’t help but want to embrace the male, but he couldn’t, he couldn’t do anything that might influence what Ciel was going to say to him. Sebastian stood frozen to the spot, his usually clam and impassive demeanour broken, torn to shreds at his feet.

 

 

 

“Sebastian, come here and sit down.” The words reached him and he walked over but remained standing, his instincts would not allow him to sit in front of his master and he had not the power to digest the information and make a decision based on anything other than instinct, he just stood, blank, silent, still.

 

***

 

Ciel stood up to his full height he slapped his butler hard across the face, the slap hurt his hand let alone the poor man’s face but Ciel figured that it might manage to shock the taller male out of his state of what he could only imagine was shock. It worked. Sebastian dropped the tray, the plate and mug crashing to the floor as his hand flung up to his cheek holding the red skin “That hurt.” He said bluntly but none the less he smiled his usual smile and sat down on the bed. Ciel crawled onto the bed until he was behind the man and carefully removed the tailcoat his butler wore “I never realised you had the capacity to feel emotions but I guess you really do, now let me see those wounds.” Ciel spoke with his usual authority. He felt Sebastian shiver slightly as he touched the raw skin, it was healing quickly, the skin having knitted together again and the muscle in his arm having fixed itself but still there remained angry red marks on the males skin that were obviously sensitive for as Ciel ran his fingers gently over them he felt the muscles tighten and the male flinch away at the pain.

 

 

 

“Sorry.” He murmured as he removed the cap of a tube and squeezed some of its contents onto his hand, the gel was cool on his fingers as he carefully rubbed it onto the wounds wincing himself as he heard Sebastian suck in his breath. His fingers slowed as he finished, he wanted to put of the inevitable for as long as possible he didn’t want to say the words that were about to come out of his mouth. “Seba...Sebastian...are you truly going to become human?” It was a stupid question, he already knew the answer he just felt bad, this was his fault after all. How did everyone around him end up in pain? He wondered. How did he cause so much misery just by existing? He kept his eyes low as he felt the older male turn around to face him and thin fingers lifted his chin so he was forced to look at the males face and still he kept his eyes averted.

 

“Ciel, I will not be reduced to some low life so...what is your answer?” His voice was calm and composed totally different from earlier. Ciel looked up into the deep black eyes “I’m sorry, you...you can go, I hereby relieve you of your service to me and discard all ties that we have to each other, live as you wish free from our contract.” Ciel kept his voice calm even though he found it hard to keep it steady while is eyes glistened slightly.

 

***

 

Sebastian's eyes widened he hadn’t expected that, he had rather assumed that Ciel would request he stayed with him but it appeared the master had more sense and reasoning than he gave him credit for. Still he was more than a little sad over the sudden change off events, he hadn’t really wanted to leave but if that was Ciel's choice then it was final. He ran a hand across his masters cheekbone and sensing his worries and regrets said “Ciel, none of this is your fault, I let my guard down when I shouldn’t for that I am sorry, I hope you can live a good life here with Bard, Finny and May Rinn, she will help you, she may seem incompetent but in reality she can be intuitive.” He looked at his master with sad eyes before carefully saying “Ciel, may I request a favour?”

 

Ciel just looked up at him before nodding his affirmative “Ciel, can I have a kiss before I leave?” It was very uncharacteristic for him to ever ask for anything, much less a kiss, things such as that normally just fell into his lap as men and women alike fell over themselves trying to please him. He watched as Ciel leaned up placing his hand lightly on Sebastian’s uninjured arm and placed his lips upon the others. Gently Sebastian shut his eyes and wallowed in the deep kiss, he carefully pried the others lips apart and slipped his tongue in moving it slowly. This was a goodbye kiss.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Authors note: Thank you everyone for your support throughout this and reviews have been lovely throughout so i am really grateful for that. I am sorry for the ending but it seemed to work...maybe if i feel nice i might write some extras to go with this story as time progresses but we shall see. I genuinely cried when i finished writing this, not only was it sad and emotional but i was so upset about finishing it it was to much! ((munching on chocolate to feel better)). I just want to say thanks to my beta reader cause she has been a babe and betaed this for me last night after an interview...i love you for that! But mainly thank you t everyone for reading and i hope i can see you all again soon! and as always any final reviews i will love it keeps me happy during my boring time of work at the moment!

[Mimitsu]

AAAAAH WHY THIS ENDING IS FU***NG KILLING ME >-

 

Awesome seriously, but I would have better liked an ending with

Sebastian staying with Ciel and eventually an ending love-making meaning they stay together for ever and ever... As humans and not as demons like in the anime series

but it's good the way you put it through to!

 

Thanks for this superb fanfiction ♥

[Dovekins]

*dies of rage*

 

Damn it

 

I thought they was gonna get a happy ending.

 

Faq........

[Casnix]

Aww I really liked the story, yet I would've preferred a much happier ending....

[Nyuchanxx]

Arhh guys I am very sorry..well I want to say that but as it would appear I am too much of a dark dark person who likes to tease her readers but equally if I was reading this fanfic as so done else I would want to scream at me too! So I welcome your yells of difiance.

[louisvove]

I can't see the last two chapters wtf

[Ichavez19]

I can't see the last two stories plz help

[Spranfjejjeb]

I can't see the last two stories??!? Why? It says show! And I click it but nothing happens

[Nyuchanxx]

Ohh sorry guys I don't know why that is...If you can't wait Google the fix name and it's on fanfic.net as well but I'll reupload asap!

[TinyCiel23]

Noooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!

U have 2 update

u book is amazing

i luv it

[rosellablack0]

You ruined my favorite anime series. No matter what i read anymore, I wont stop thinking about this. I hate you.

[Whiteshadow5043]

Uh you chose to read this.....