A New Life

[tuti]

Adam tried to hold Matt's gaze but he couldn't, he felt useless. It was crazy and he couldn't even start thinking how Matt was probably feeling, not only that, the dangers that being pregnant and male would bring. Was this his fault? Well the condom was broken...That's it! The condom! Now he remembered the condom was kind of funny at the tip AND broken...so could it be? He stepped closer to his friends and wrapped his arms around him. "I'm sorry, so sorry. The doctors can't explain it, but it seems your body crated a womb and...and you got pregnant." He then stepped back but kept his hands on Matt's shoulders. "I'm sorry this is all my fault." He had to find out about that condom, he had to find that guy that gave it to him.

[Zombie_In_A_Box]

Matt stared at Adam as he felt tears gathering in the corners of his eyes. "T-That can't be..." He muttered out to himself as the tears started rolling down his cheeks. "I can't... Pregnant..." He nearly whispered out when he felt Adam wrap his arms around him. The blonde found it too hard to take in for him. It didn't take much for him to start sobbing while tightly gripping the taller male's shirt. "W-What am I supposed to do now?..." He questioned between the sobs, his whole body shaking. When he heard that it was Adam't fault, he lifted his head up, looking at the other with tears still flowing down his cheeks. "B-but... You used a condom... Nothing could've..." He whipered out before nearly choking on the tears. His hands slowly slid down to grab the bed sheets. This couldn't be happening...

[tuti]

Even if they hadn't have used a condom it was impossible for Matt to get pregnant. He was a man after all. But something told him that the condom he used had something to do with this and he was going to find out no matter what. But first his priority now was Matt's health. Women were made to carry babies, not men. Being pregnant was not only abnormal for Matt but dangerous. "We should talk with the doctor, and see what way is better for an abortion. Since the pregnancy is still in an early stage." He said hating himself for the pain he caused to Matt.

 

(personally I'm against abortion, except for rape cases.)

[Zombie_In_A_Box]

Matt's eyes widened when he heard what Adam had said. He clenched his teeth to stop the tears, took in a deep breath and looked over at his lover before hissing out, “No.“ He gripped onto the bed sheets tightly with one hand and wrapped the other around his abdomen. “I can't take the life of something so small... And you didn't even hesitate offering to kill your own child?“ The blonde asked quietly and looked into the other's eyes, his own still filled with tears. “I'm not having an abortion.“ He said with a slightly colder voice just to make sure that Adam didn't argue with him. It wasn't normal, sure, but it was his and Adam's child... He could never kill it.

 

[[i absolutely can't stand abortion... On rape cases, sure, it's an exception, but any other way seems just wrong to me...]]

[tuti]

There was no doubt that Adam cared for the baby as well, he was going to be a father and even though the thought scared him a part of him felt excited. Yet he had to push that part of him away and think rational for Matt's sake. "Matt, listen to me. If you go through with this, your life will be in danger. Giving birth is not an easy task." He said trying to make Matt see that his own life was in danger and change his mind. True, he'd love his child but could he be blamed for caring more about Matt's health? This was after all, all his fault. Matt wouldn't be in this situation if it weren't for him.

[Zombie_In_A_Box]

"I don't care! I'm not going to kill my child!" Matt yelled out at Adam while clutching onto his abdomen. "I won't have an abortion..." He said a quietly and looked away from the other. "I don't care that my life is going to be in danger. I don't care. This baby is going to see the daylight... And if you want so, only one man he will call daddy." Matt said as his lower lip trembled from the tears that were bound to errupt sooner or later. "I'm not asking for you to grow my child with me... Just... Just don't make me kill it.." The blonde nearly whispered out and bit his lower lip, his body shaking from the tears he was holding in. "Nothing can make me get rid of it... Not even you." The shorter male finished quietly, keeping his eyes away for all the time he was talking.

[tuti]

Seeing Matt like this caused a weird heavy feeling in Adam's chest and he sighed defeated. Matt could be very stubborn sometimes. "What are you talking about?" He began his tone soft and filled with care. No point and making Matt more upset, not in his state. "Of course I want to be part of this, I AM part of it." He paused. "I wont suggest an abortion, I'm sorry, believe me when I say I care for you both." He touched Matt's chin, and lightly turned his face so that he could see the man's face. "Still, I want you to think this over. It's not going to be easy, think about your career. How are we going to explain this to the agency? To our parents?" He said. Of course he was willing to stand beside Matt all the way down. He just wanted Matt to really think this situation through. To think about all the things he was about to risk.

[Zombie_In_A_Box]

Matt sniffled softly and slowly turned his eyes at the other. "I can just tell them the truth... I won't be able to hide it anyway... Besides, there's gotta be some explanation to this..." He mumbled under his nose while holding his abdomen with one hand. "As for my parents... Well my mom will support me no matter what, that's how she is,.." He said softly and smiled slightly. "And my dad... I don't know... I won't allow you to take blame for it, anyway. I'm just as "guilty" as you are..." The blonde said and smiled softly at the other. "But he might still throw a pile of curses and threats at you... Just so you know... If you'll even come along..." He said with hopeful eyes as he looked up at his lover.

[tuti]

Adam captured Matt's face with both his hands before leaning forward and kissed the man's lips tenderly, tasting sweetness mixed with the salty taste of salty tears. "There's nothing I wouldn't do for you." He said after resting his forehead against Matt's, and he meant it. He wasn't sure what he felt towards his friend was exactly love. He'd never fallen in love before. But one thing he was certain of, he cared for Matt in a way he'd never cared for someone else before. "Okay I'll bring the doctor in, he should fill us in what we should do next." He said with a smile. He had to show strength if he was going to support Matt. As he left in search for the doctor he made a mental note to go to the bar tonight, not for a drink. But to search for the man that gave him the condom. He didn't know him, but he had seen his face at the establishment before, he probably was a regular. He sure as hell was going to answer Adam's questions.

[Zombie_In_A_Box]

Matt smiled softly as he kissed back the other, his mind finally calming down. "Thanks, Adam..." He said softly as he closed his eyes and leaned into the touch of his lover for a bit. He loved the feeling of Adam's gentle hands on his face, holding him so carefully... The blonde felt as if he was truly cared for, as if he was truly loved. Not because of his proffesion, not because of his status, but because he was him... At least he hoped it was that way.

 

-----

 

After the doctor told them Matt could leave the hospital for the night, the blonde smiled happily at his lover and lightly gripped onto the other's hand as he listened as to when he should be back and what he should do in case the pain hit him again. The golden-eyed male slowly got out of bed once the doctor was out, holding onto Adam with both hands just so he wouldn't fall down. "I still feel dizzyyy..." Matt groaned out softly as he let go off the other and turned to walk towards his clothes. The nightshirt the hospital provided him with was rather uncomfortable...

[tuti]

Adam folded his arms over his chest as he watched Matt change. "Well you heard what the doctor said, you'll have to eat healthy for two now. I know that as a model you have a certain diet you must follow, but you need the strength." He said. It was funny that he talked about healthy food when he himself couldn't even cook properly.

 

Matt finished and after signing some papers he was clear to leave. As they made their way towards Adam's car, Adam with his hand at Matt's lower back for support, he couldn't stop thinking about the condom. He couldn't shake the feeling of it. With a sigh he decided that it would best to tell Matt, the man deserved the truth.

 

He opened the door for the blonde to get in and rushed to the driver's side closing the door behind him. He sat there and instead of starting the engine, he turned to face the beautiful man.

 

"Matt, there's something I have to tell you." He began. "Last night...The condom that I used was given to me by a man at the bar. When I used it I noticed that the tip of it was a bit strange," yet that didn't stop me "and later I realized that it was broken." He said it, honesty taking the best of him. "I have the feeling that he can explain to me what's going on."

[Zombie_In_A_Box]

Matt let out a soft sigh as he listened to the other talk about his meals. "I know... I can't stay as a model now anyway, unless they want a pregnant male..." He muttered out as he slipped on the shirt over his head and ran a hand through his hair until he was sure he was ready.

 

The blonde held onto his lover as the two walked towards the car, his steps a bit slower and heavier than usually. He couldn't believe that another life was growing inside of him... Well, would be growing. Matt kept an arm wrapped around his abdomen, as if trying to protect the unborn baby from any dangers that may have awaited it.

 

When he was able to get into the car, Matt gladly sat down and let out a small sigh. He felt a lot better while sitting than standing... Guess he had to get used to this for now, hm? The doctor also mentioned that he shouldn't overwork himself..

 

Just when Matt was about to ask why Adam didn't even start the engine, the later started talking. The golden eyes became a bit wider when he heard what the other had to say, then let out a soft smile. "We can both go to that bar and check it out... Just let me take a nap before we leave, okay?" He asked with a smile and put on the seatbelt before wrapping a hand around his abdomen again. He had a feeling this would become a habit of him...

[tuti]

Adam blinked several times, shocked at Adam's reaction. He'd expected the other to yell at him, whine or at least blame him. But he did none of that, was this because of the baby? Hmm he didn't know and shook his head with a smile. He'd feared the other would hate and blame him but he was glad he was wrong. He brought the car to life and drove towards Matt's place. All the way silently thinking about how his life had change in one night. Now he was about to be a father...were the first male couple to conceive? He wondered.

 

---

 

Back in the house Adam helped Matt get back in bed. "You sure you want to come with me? You can stay bed longer." He asked pulling the bed covers all the way up to Matt's chest. The man looked tired, but the doctor said it was because his body was still adjusting to the changes.

[Zombie_In_A_Box]

Matt smiled softly and took the other's hand. "Yeah, I wanna come..." He said softly and snuggled into the blankets, entwining their fingers together. "I'll just head back to sleep once we get back~ But I gotta see the guy... I want to know why us.." He muttered out as he closed his eyes, then one thing flashed through his mind and the golden eyes were instantly open again as he stared at Adam. "Wait, you said the condom was weird at the tip?" He asked while gripping his lover's hand tighter. "And afterwards, the condom was leaking?..." He asked while feeling slightly scared.

[tuti]

Adam closed his eyes and nodded. "Yeah." He admitted and decided to come clean. "I did notice it, but in the heat of the moment I didn't pay much attention to it. I'm sorry." He said tightening his hold on Matt's hand. "I'd never imagine...that this would be the results." He added, barely a whisper.

[Zombie_In_A_Box]

Matt looked at the other with wide eyes. "Adam... This... I-I've heard about something like this from a friend..." He muttered out while gulping down something hard that seemed to be stuck in his throat. "He said this one guy tried giving him the condom and he did, but when he was about to use it... Well, there was something on the tip, just like you said... He decided to give it for someone to check it out, and he said it was something like... Something like a parazite..." The blonde said quietly and shivered at the thought of having something like this inside of him. "M-Maybe that was just a coincidence, and I don't think it was true, but still..."

[tuti]

Adam took it all in with a frown. A parasite? What the hell? "That sounds similar to the condom I used..." He said trailing off. "But we wont know for sure until we talk to this guy." He said and patted Matt's hand as he stood up. "Now you have to rest, I'll wake up in an hour. Okay?" He said with a smile that didn't really reach his eyes and went to the living room. Confusing, everything was so confusing he was starting have a headache. As he sat the long coach he set the alarm on his phone and closed his eyes. He too, needed some rest from all the craziness going on.

[Zombie_In_A_Box]

Matt nodded slightly as he watched the other walk away, feeling something close to hurt appearing in his chest. Couldn't Adam stay here? With him? His bed was big enough for both of them... Or maybe Adam didn't want to do anything else with him. The blonde could see that the smile didn't reach his friend's eyes, but why was he faking it? Maybe now he saw Matt as some kind of a... Whore? He had sex with the other on the first night, they were driven by alcohol and then he got pregnant... Maybe Adam thought he was disgusting now? Deciding to shake off the thoughts just for now, the golden-eyed male sadly gripped the pillow and slowly fell asleep, all those thoughts re-playing in his mind over and over.

[tuti]

Adam was suddenly awaken by the screaming sound of his phone, the alarm went off but he hadn't really expected to actually fall asleep. He rubbed his hands against his face as if to rub the sleepiness away and walked back into Matt's room. Matt was still deeply asleep, so Adam had the chance to study his friend's face for a while. Matt looked so peaceful, it pained Adam to wake him up. Wake him up to the reality he created for him. If he hadn't accepted that condom none of this would have happened, if he had kept his desire and lust controlled Adam wouldn't have to go through all this. He felt like shit, this was all his fault. Here he was promising never to hurt him, but he was the main reason why he was in pain in the first place. Adam schooled his expression and placed both hands on Matt's shoulders. "He sleepy head, wake up." He said shaking the man lightly.

[Zombie_In_A_Box]

Matt let out a soft groan before slowly opening his eyes. For a few seconds, he just stared at Adam, his brain refusing to work and remember what happened. Then it all came back like some kind of a wave and the blonde winced slightly, feeling as if something was inside his skull, just running around and banging it. Hard. "Mmm... Adam..." He muttered out weakly and sighed as he closed his eyes again. "...It hurts..." The shorter man said quietly as he clutched his abdomen with one hand and reached out to rub his forehead with the other. "Ugh, I feel like something is shooting inside my skull..." The blonde complained softly and slowly opened his eyes again to look at Adam. "Help me get up?"

 

- - - Updated - - -

 

Matt let out a soft groan before slowly opening his eyes. For a few seconds, he just stared at Adam, his brain refusing to work and remember what happened. Then it all came back like some kind of a wave and the blonde winced slightly, feeling as if something was inside his skull, just running around and banging it. Hard. "Mmm... Adam..." He muttered out weakly and sighed as he closed his eyes again. "...It hurts..." The shorter man said quietly as he clutched his abdomen with one hand and reached out to rub his forehead with the other. "Ugh, I feel like something is shooting inside my skull..." The blonde complained softly and slowly opened his eyes again to look at Adam. "Help me get up?"

[tuti]

Matt didn't have to ask twice, Adam around and moving in a second. He helped Matt move into sitting position and kneeled in front of him. "Do you need anything? You want a painkiller?" He asked concern could be heard in his voice. Yes he was concern for the man carrying his child, maybe because of the guilt? Probably, but also because he genuinely cared for the model. "Please ask of me anything." Honestly, he felt useless. He wanted to make Matt feel better. But how?

[Zombie_In_A_Box]

Matt let out a soft smile and gently tugged the other's shirt. "Come here and stay with me for a bit..." He asked softly as he looked at Adam. "You don't have to be scared... Nothing will happen to me." The blonde said and smiled as he waited for the taller male to get into the bed with him. The thoughts that he was having before he fell asleep slowly came back. Matthew could feel his lips' corners turning a bit downwards as he thought about it again. There was no way Adam would think that way... No way... Right?

[tuti]

Adam joined Matt on the bed and sat behind the other, hugging him from behind. "But I am scared." He said tightening his hold. "God I'm so scared for you." He said resting his forehead against the hollow of Matt's neck. He knew he had to show strength so that Matt knew he had support, but right now he couldn't even pretend to be strong. Not with the feeling of guilt and the pain it was causing Matt. "This is all my fault, I wish, I had never accepted that condom...or something..." He trailed off. "I hate to see you like this."

[Zombie_In_A_Box]

The last words that came from the other deeply hurt Matt as he looked away. "You hate seeing me like this? You hate the idea that a man is carrying a child? You think of me as disgusting? A whore?" He asked quietly as he gripped onto the bed sheets. "You know, don't even bother answering. What's the point of answering to someone you hate seeing anyway?" The blonde said, hurt obvious in his voice. He didn't know what made him say that - maybe he was tired, maybe confused... Maybe he really felt that way. Matthew couldn't tell himself anymore. He couldn't even begin to understand himself now.

[tuti]

Adam's eyes widened dangerously wide and he moved so that they were facing each other. "I didn't say that! What made you even think I could have those thoughts about you?!" He said heat in his eyes but not directed to Matt. "When I said I hate seeing you like this, I mean in pain." He explained and took Matt's hand in his. "It makes me feel useless because no matter how much I care for you, I can't do anything to make you feel better." He went on. "A whore? Never, you are important to me, never forget that."