~This Isn't Love...Is It?~ (1x1 between XxMissxPhantomhivexX and ~*~FaLlEn*SnOw~*~)

[XxMissxPhantomhivexX]

Allen said a small thank you to the samurai as he peeked open his hands, peering down at Timcampy. Seeing that the golem was alright, he gently placed him inside his pocket where he would be safe. He glanced at Kanda then bit his lip. "Kanda, can I ask you a question? And no, I don't mean this question I'm asking now."

[~*~FaLlEn*SnOw~*~]

Kanda turns his head slightly to look at Allen, about to say that he was already asking a question, but was beat to that by Allen. He shrugs, as if saying that Allen could ask him, and waits for whatever Allen was going to say. He was looking back out at the scenery once again, wondering what Allen could possibly want to ask him, he was sure the boy knew how often he rarely gave straight-forward answers, that or totally avoided answering at all.

[XxMissxPhantomhivexX]

Allen leaned against the railing, looking down at the train tracks that looked like a blur as the train sped over them. He bit his lip again, wondering if he should actually ask. He honestly didn't know if the samurai would answer him though he hoped that he would.

 

"I know that when we first meet it was on the best of first terms but...why do you hate me? If I did anything to offend you when we first meet then I'm sorry but I can't understand why you despise me so much." The young exorcist muttered, tensing in preparation for the samurai to beat him up or start yelling at him.

[~*~FaLlEn*SnOw~*~]

That's what he had to ask? Why Kanda hated him so much? The samurai's eyes narrow slightly, and he frowns at the back of Allen's head. He himself wasn't even sure as to why he hated Allen so much...he just...did. Kanda huffs, and turns his back to the white-haired boy. "Why do you care if I hate you or not? And maybe you did do something to offend me, but maybe you didn't. I don't like you, and that's all there is to it. It's nothing to get so worked up about. Just deal with the fact that you and I won't ever see eye to eye, understand Short Stack?" He leaves Allen standing there, going back in side the train, and walking back to their compartment.

 

Why did he hate Allen? If he really thought about it...he realizes there really WAS no reason...none at all...and that, in fact, he didn't hate Allen at all. He sighs, and goes into the compartment, sitting down on the seat, and frowning as the questions and thoughts continued to roll around in his mind.

[XxMissxPhantomhivexX]

Allen sighed and buried his face against his hands. He tried not to let it but the samurai's reply stung him. He knew why he cared so much but he refused to let the other male know what it was. Allen didn't know when it started. Maybe when Kanda saved him from those Akuma, or when he had helped him up from when he fell but despite his best efforts Allen..couldn't help that his feelings have changed towards the samurai. He couldn't help it and he scolded himself on ever thinking the other exorcist would feel anything but hatred for him. He sighed again, not moving to go back inside. He couldn't go back in there when Kanda was in there, not right now.

[~*~FaLlEn*SnOw~*~]

The time seems to fly by, and before Kanda knew it, they were back at headquarters, having left the train and made their way up the hill through an underground entrance. It had been about five minutes before they had arrived into town when Lavi had awoken again, and was now trying to rub off the marker that was on his face. Kanda was silent as they walked, staying a bit ahead of the two, not saying anything, or seeing if the other two were keeping up with his fast paced walking.

 

They reach the top of the place, and walk out on a sort of tier, before turning down a hall and headed towards Cief Komui's office. First they had to report to Komui, and only after would they go to supper, that, or if Chief Komui insisted, to the infirmary. Reaching the door, Kanda knocks, and hearing for them to come on in, Kanda opens the door. "You're back! Thank goodness you three are alright! I heard about what happened in the grave yard, I hope you two are doing okay..." Komui smiles at them, a slightly worried look in his eye. "I'm fine. Don't worry about me." Kanda says simply.

[XxMissxPhantomhivexX]

Allen trailed behind Kanda and slightly behind Lavi, quietly lost in his thoughts. He couldn't but feel sad as he recalled Kanda's words to him. He looked up when the gate-keeper admitted them into the order and followed he other two back to Komui's office.

 

"I'm fine as well." Allen stated softly, avoiding looking at Kanda. He told Komui of what happened and then leaving the office when the Chief dismissed them. He walked down to the cafeteria and over to the window. "Hey Allen, I'm glad you're back. What can I get for you today?" Jerry said with a large smile. Allen gave him a weak smile in return and uttered words he never thought would ever in a billion years leave his lips.

 

"Thanks but can I just have some tea? I'm not really hungry."

 

He thought Jerry was going to have a heart-attack then and there as he stared at Allen in complete shock. It was a moment before he could move and comply to the white-haired boy. He handed him a cup of tea and watched with worry as the young exorcist walked over to an empty table and sit down.

[~*~FaLlEn*SnOw~*~]

As they were dismissed, Lavi didn't have time to go to the cafeteria, as Bookman was waiting for him so they could talk about something. With a wave, Lavi leaves the two, and heads in the opposite direction. Without glancing back, Kanda walks ahead of Allen, but pauses slightly, so that Allen could order first, though he was almost as surprised as Jerry as the white-haired boy orders nothing except for tea. Once Allen sat down, Kanda steps forward, looking over at Allen quickly before ordering a serving of soba, and a glass of tea. He waits silently, every now and then glancing at Allen.

 

His food in hand after Jerry had finished, he walks over to an partly empty table, a few finders and other exorcists sitting there. However when he sat down, they scooted down the seat, to distance themselves from the samurai. Kanda ignores this, and takes a bite of his food, and glancing up at the back of Allen's head. He had chosen a table that was two table spaced from Allen, and had a good view of where he was sitting. Kanda could tell something wasn't right...maybe it was something he had said on the train...But Kanda shakes his head, sighing. Allen should have been ready for an answer like that...

[XxMissxPhantomhivexX]

Allen sipped his tea quietly, keeping his eyes on the table. He heard a silence a few tables behind him and figured that Kanda must have sat down. He didn't look back, instead he quickly finished his tea and exited the cafeteria. He walked slowly down the hall, heading for his room. He opened then door then shut it before collapsing onto his bed with a sigh. Timcampy fluttered around his head, wondering what was wrong with his master.

[~*~FaLlEn*SnOw~*~]

Kanda's eyes follow as Allen gets up from his table and then leaves the cafeteria, a small frown upon Yu's lips. Something wasn't right...Kanda sighs, and when he was finished with his own food, he hands Jerry his dirty dishes, before heading down the hall towards his room. When he passes by Allen's door, he pauses, standing in front of the closed door. For a moment, he just stood there, not sure of what to do, but then he turns to face it, and knocks. "Hey, is something wrong? You've been really quiet since we had that conversation..." Kanda calls through the door.

[XxMissxPhantomhivexX]

Allen shot upright on his bed, eyes looking at his door in surprise. What was Kanda doing knocking at his door? Or better yet, asking him if something was wrong? Allen swung his legs over the side of his bed, staring at his door. "I'm fine." He called back in an emotionless voice. If Kanda was never going to feel anything but dislike towards him, what was the point in trying anymore?

[~*~FaLlEn*SnOw~*~]

"You don't sound fine..." Kanda replies, and opens the door, and walking in, shutting it behind him. As he looked at Allen, he felt that same bubbly feeling from before, but this time does not look away. Why did he feel like this? He didn't really know at that moment, but what he did know was that, even though he didn't want to admit it, he hated knowing the fact that Allen was feeling upset for some reason. He walks over to Allen, and, hooking his finger around Allen's chin, makes the white haired boy look up at him. "What's wrong?" He repeats, his voice low and a bit softer sounding.

[XxMissxPhantomhivexX]

Allen felt tears prick his eyes and he jerked his chin away, standing and walking away from the samurai. He was not going to cry, not in front of Kanda. "Why do you care? You don't like me, remember?" Allen said bitterly, facing away from the taller male as he clenched his hands into fists.

[~*~FaLlEn*SnOw~*~]

Kanda frowns when Allen jerks his face away, standing up and walking a few paces away from him, turning his back on Kanda. "I...don't know why I care...I just...do..." Kanda replies, uncertain as well...But he wasn't going to let Allen act like this. And then, something he couldn't describe washes over him, and without even thinking he walked over to Allen, his hand clasping on to the white-haired boy's arm, and turns him so that he was facing Yu once more. He looks into Allen's eyes, that feeling once more forming deep inside. Then, without hesitation, he presses his lips against Allen's, not sure why he was doing what he was doing, he just...did it...

[XxMissxPhantomhivexX]

Allen's eyes widened when he felt his body being spun around, looking up into the samurai's eyes with surprise. He was even more surprised however when he felt the other male press his lips to his. Allen was shell-shocked, frozen in place. His brain was unable to process what was happening. Eventually he regained motor skills and pushed the samurai away weakly, the tears held at bay before now streaming down his face. "Don't..." He said meekly, "D-Don't mess with my emotions! I know y-you don't care s-so don't act like you d-do!" The white-haired boy sniffled, wrapping his arms around himself.

[~*~FaLlEn*SnOw~*~]

Kanda sighs when Allen pushes him away, albeit very weakly. "I'm not messing around Allen...I can't explain it, it's just...that's how I feel...When I look at you, I can't understand what it is that's going on inside me, so that's why I tell you to stay away or try not to look at you...that's why I push you away, and act like I hate you." He stares at Allen's face. "Because...in reality...I don't hate you, no. I may have hated you at first, but that hatred changed...in the end...I think I've fallen in love with you..." He says this with the up most sincerity, the way he said it, the way his face looked...there was no way that anyone could even imagine he was lying.

[XxMissxPhantomhivexX]

Allen froze, staring at the samurai with tear-filled eyes. His brain seemed unable to process what it just heard and it took him a moment for the words to sink in. When they did, he found himself crying harder than he already was and burying his face against the taller males chest, gripping the front of his shirt tightly as he prayed that this wasn't just all a dream.

[~*~FaLlEn*SnOw~*~]

Kanda was relieved when Allen didn't try to leave, but instead came over to him, burying his face in Yu's chest, gripping onto his jacket. Slowly, Kanda places his arms around Allen's form, and hugs him gently, his eyes closing slightly, and he looks down at the top of Allen's head. All this about emotions of love was still new to Kanda, but...he knew for a while he had been feeling something that he knew had to be love for Allen...what else could it be? That overwhelming want and need to keep Allen safe, to protect him and help him, to make sure he was safe...Jealousy and annoyance whenever Lavi or any other person hugged him, or even talked to him... Yes, there was only one way that Kanda could describe this as. "I'm sorry...if I ever hurt you...I'm just...not used to these feelings just yet..."

[XxMissxPhantomhivexX]

Allen felt Kanda's arms wrap around him and it comforted the white-haired boy. Soon his tears dried up and he pulled back slightly, wiping his eyes as he looked up at the samurai. "I know and I forgive you." Allen said softly, giving the samurai a weak smile.

[~*~FaLlEn*SnOw~*~]

Kanda smiles softly at Allen, glad that he had been forgiven. "Thank you..." He murmurs softly. He hugs Allen again, before walking over to the door. It had gotten late, and Kanda was feeling really tired all of a sudden. "Well...I think it would be best if we got some sleep. If...if you need anything, just come to my room...Good night..." He then leaves the room, closing the door quietly behind him.

 

He takes a deep breath, and heads down the hall towards his own room, and once inside he takes off his jacket, tossing it aside, and then changes into a pair of tie up loose fitting pants. He lays down on his bed, his hair, which he had taken out of the ponytail, spreading out beneath his head. Staring up at the ceiling, he sighs, before closing his eyes. Did he really just tell Allen how he felt? He felt so weird...talking about the way he felt to Allen...but in a way it was nice as well.

[XxMissxPhantomhivexX]

Allen nodded and watched as Kanda left his room. He waited a moment before he smiled and laid down onto his bed. He snuggled under the blankets, curling up on his side. He felt a lot better since coming back to the Order and he knew it was because of Kanda. Allen giggled to himself, happy that the samurai returned his feelings. The white-haired boy laid there for a moment before his eyes started to drift shut and he was soon asleep.

[~*~FaLlEn*SnOw~*~]

It felt like time had fast forwarded, as before Kanda knew it, it was morning once more. He sighs as he sits up in bed, and for a while he doesn't move, but sits there, thinking about what had happened the night before. Eventually he moves from his bed, changing into his regular clothes, and once Mugen was in place, he leaves his room, heading towards the cafeteria, and once there he gets his usual meal. Soba and tea. He wondered if Allen was feeling any better, he was worried about the wound that he had gotten from when they were in Russia. He takes a sip of his tea, and looks to the doorway, waiting to eat once Allen arrived.

[XxMissxPhantomhivexX]

Allen blinked his eyes open and sat up, rubbing his eyes and yawning. The memories of last night brought a smile to his face and he climbed out of bed. He dressed in his usual attire and exited his room. His stomach was grumbling loudly seeing as he skipped dinner. He entered the cafeteria, heading straight for the window. Jerry gave him a concerned look which turned into a smile when the boy sprout off his normal long list of orders. Allen happily took his food then faced the room, looking for a place to sit.

[~*~FaLlEn*SnOw~*~]

Kanda watches as Allen entered the cafeteria, a small smile forming upon his lips as he watched Allen make his way over to Jerry. Those who were already there, and could see Kanda's face stare, not sure if the light was playing tricks on their eyes. Many began to murmur, nudging the people next to them, and whiserping about how 'Yu Kanda is smiling!' Kanda ignores this, and catches Allen's eye when the white haired boy looked around for a spot to eat. Once he had Allen's attention, he would slightly nod his head,as if saying it was okay to come and sit with him.

[XxMissxPhantomhivexX]

Allen's face practically lit up and he smiled, making his way over to Kanda. He sat by the samurai, ignoring the murmuring that got louder when the other male made no move to try and kill him for sitting next to him. Allen began to eat happily, his leg lightly pressing against Kanda's.