Lost in Love [Bellala99 & Keru-chan]

[Zombie_In_A_Box]

Akano spent the last fifteen minutes just trying to figure out how to use his wheelchair - by now, a smile was spreading on his face, since he was able to move again! A soft chuckle left his lips when he almost bumped into his bed - he didn't risk going out to the halls yet... There were too many people he could possibly hurt. The nurse seemed to be getting happier as well - watching the red head was like watching a child who just got a candy.

 

When his boyfriend's voice reached his ears, Akano's smile widened even more and he moved to him once the blond entered through the door. "Hey, babe~" He greeted with a chuckle as he smiled softly - sadly, he wasn't able to move up to kiss him... Yeah, that was definitely the worst thing. "Will you help me get through the hospital... Though, I should probably get dressed first..." Akano thought out loud as he drove up to his bed and sighed softly. "Can you help?" The nurse seemed to walk out at some point - probably realized she should give the boys some privacy.

[Keru-chan]

The first thing he saw was the smiling face of his boyfriend. Then the wheelchair came into the picture. And so, the younger one couldn't help but curve his lips in a soft smile as he let his bag drop to the floor and he watched the other one roll away to the bed. It had been awhile since he had last seen him this excited. And somehow, that childish smile of his reminded him of the time when everything had been alright and perfectly fine. A fact which only made him more aware of the sad truth that the other one would probably not be able to touch him like before. But it didn't matter. Because as long as Akano was happy, he was happy too. And that they shared the same emotions for each other was all he needed.

 

Letting his hands reach out to the other one he suddenly stopped. Slightly embarrassed since he didn't know how to proceed. "Should you sit on the bed or..?" He aksed while his cheeks got a little warmer when he realized that he would see the other one naked. And even though it wasn't the first time it had been awhile since last time. He swallowed, let his hands hang in the air as he met those familiar golden coloured eyes that he loved so deeply.

[Zombie_In_A_Box]

Akano let out a small chuckle as he looked up at Yukio and grinned. "Well, if you help me up and sit me back down, sure." He teased while rolling his eyes. "Just give them to me, I can at least put on my shirt... But, ugh, I can't really put on pants." The red head whined comically as he puffed out his cheeks before bursting out laughing - somehow today he was in a really good mood... As if he wasn't disabled at all. Life was perfect!

 

He smiled softly as he began unbuttoning the hospital gown - he wasn't ashamed or embarrassed about his boyfriend seeing him or anything like that... Though it was a pity he couldn't work out anymore. At this point, his thoughts drifted back to something the doctor mentioned once - there was still a chance he could go through intense treatment and... And regain his ability to walk. Akano made sure not to tell his boyfriend about it - if he was going to get money, he was going to get it himself, and no help would be accepted.

[Keru-chan]

That small familiar short laugther that left his boyfriend's pale lips made his cheeks burn even more when he realized how stupid he actually had looked while asking such a stupid question. The younger one turned away his face, drew a deep breath and then exhaled in a sigh to then softly grab Akano's arms and after a while lifted him up from his sitting position. His body was heavy but Yukio's grip around it was steady and firm as he then turned the other one around and placed him on the bed. After it was done, he straigthened his back and then grabbed the shirt to then in exactly right moment hand it to the other one when he had finished to unbutton the hospital gown. It was almost painful to watch tht smile that remained on his boyfriend's lips. Because after all the hardships that they had gone through he wondered how the other one was still able to smile so happily while still being like this. He was so strong. So much stronger than himself.

 

The younger one sighed, and then grabbed the underwear to then crouch down and lift up his boyfriend's legs as he focused his gaze to the floor. Then his face suddenly got serious. "Akano...Do you ever miss being able to walk?" He said and then straightened his back as he was finished with the underwear. "I mean..Like do you ever really wish there was a way to regain the ability to walk?". He had thought about this a lot on the last time. How different it would be if Akano would be able to walk. In that way, he would never have to see his beloved cry again.

[Zombie_In_A_Box]

Akano couldn't help but feel guilty when Yukio had to pick him up and get him to the bed so he could dress up. Like all the times before, the red head tried his best to move his legs at least a little bit, but his efforts were fruitless. He was definitely going to collect the money for himself... Even if he could live a life like this, he didn't want for his boyfriend to suffer as well. No, he wanted to go through this alone all along...

 

He smiled softly while putting on the shirt instead of the hospital gown he was wearing - gosh, it was so good to finally get out of it... The fabric was annoying the hell out of him. And it was rustling always, no matter what he did... Ugh... While the blond was putting on his underwear, Akano looked away with his cheeks a soft shade of red. He felt like a child again like this... However, the question made him flinch slightly as he looked at the other with a frown.

 

"Of course I do... But, I mean, even if there was one, it's probably really expencive." He felt bad about lying, but it was really for Yukio's sake... "C'mon, I want to get out of this stinking place as soon as I can!" Akano teased with a warm grin while looking at his boyfriend softly. He didn't want a discussion about this again... He made it clear that he wouldn't take money from the young student. Not now, not ever.

[Keru-chan]

Something wasn't right. And it bugged him that his boyfriend suddenly became so uncomfortable with the subject. But the student didn't even dare to continue on it. So instead he let out a light sigh and then formed his lips into a vague but kind smile as he took a hold of the pants. "Well yeah, nothing in this world is free". He smiled at his boyfriend and then began to put on the pants. He knew didn't he? But he didn't want to say anything to him.

 

When he was finished he helped his boyfriend down in the wheelchair and lightly stroked his hair and gave him a soft kiss on his cheek to then straighten on his back and position himself behind the wheelchair. "Then here we go" he said and started to push the wheelchair forward and opened the door. People recognized them on their way out. Which wasn't strange though. Akano had been here for a pretty long time and he himself had also been here many times under these weeks. Though, when they finally reached the doors that would lead out there was only him and Akano. All alone. And without a word he opened the doors and then rolled him out. "Welcome out again".

[Zombie_In_A_Box]

Akano smiled softly at the affection he was getting from his boyfriend - he wished he could repay in the same way... With a small sigh, he put his hands on the handles of the wheelchair and smiled to himself before letting out a light chuckle. "Feels good to finally be out of this room~" He said jokingly, laughing softly as they entered the hallroom. The red head smiled at the people, saying his good-byes and even some get-well wishes. After all, most of the people here were sick, or like him - disabled either for life, or until they got the money to pay for the treatment. Even now, for his stay, he knew there was a lot taken from his health insurance.

 

When they were outside, Akano sighed to himself and smiled, glancing up at the blond. "It really is great..." He muttered out, closing his eyes as a soft breeze blew through his hair. He could feel something warm and soft in his heart as he hummed slightly, then suddenly opened his eyes. "Ah! I almost forgot... Yukio, did I say that I can keep my job?" Akano asked excitedly as he looked at his boyfriend. "Apparently some people still want me to be in their parties - they said that they could take care of my work place so that it's comfortable with a wheelchair~" It seemed that Akano suddenly became so cheerful and happy, it was like he began... Shining, just radiating joy.

[Keru-chan]

That joyful smile, it warmed his lonely and cold heart as he looked back at his boyfriend. His light blue eyes filled with kindness, warmth and love as he observed the other one. A cool breeze swept by them, caressed his cheeks with a slight coldness as he listened to the other one. Everything seemed to go back to it's original state. Because apparently, Akano would still be able to work. Did that mean like it would be exactly like before? He didn't know but somewhere inside it pained him to know that they would still not be able to see each other as often as he himself wanted. They were occupied with their own lives. And even though he was happy for his boyfriend's sake he somewhere inside of him wished that Akano wouldn't continue with his old job. At the same time as the thought had slipped into his mind he became ashamed of himself. Wishing and longing for something so horrible even though he knew that his boyfriend loved his job. He was truly a horrible person.

 

Yukio gave his boyfriend a warm smile as his eyes narrowed and softened and slowly he took off his scarf to wrap it around Akano's neck. "I'm happy for your sake" He said. Thereafter a little bus came to pick them up and drive them home to his boyfriend's home.

[Zombie_In_A_Box]

Akano blinked a few times and let out a light chuckle when the scarf was placed around his neck. He shook his head and took it off, giving it back to Yukio. "It would be worse if you got sick, not me." He said softly, the same care and love in his voice as always. The red head smiled softly as they got into the van and sighed out softly to himself. He felt bad since he knew he'd have to work a lot to earn the money... But he couldn't let Yukio suffer too long - taking care of him like this was probably tiring, at the very least.

 

Once they were at his house, Akano sighed out softly and smiled widely. "Man, I've missed this place!" He exclaimed with a laugh as he began pushing the wheelchair by himself - he had to practice, after all. The DJ smiled to himself - though the smile died out when he saw the stairs. "...Dammit." He mumbled out to himself as he groaned and sighed. "I forgot to tell them... Hey, Yukio, could you get me my phone?" The taller male asked while turning to the blond with a goofy expression on his face. "It should be upstairs... I'll call the guy who instals some thing that helps me use the stairs."

[Keru-chan]

When they finally arrived at the house he wrapped the scarf around his own neck a little more tightly and then observed how his boyfriend rolled over to the house. He was already pretty good and Yukio doubted that it would take a long time before he would be able to move around without his help in that wheelchair. Which made him happy and at the same time somewhat sad. But a kind smile still remained on his lips as he followed his boyfriend to the stairs where they both stopped. And it was then he realised what he had missed. The stairs. Why hadn't he thought about it earlier? Stupid him. "Okay" He quietly mumbled and then walked up to the door and unlocked it with the extra key he had gotten from Akano to then proceed with entering the house. Quickly he ran up to the upper floor, got the phone and then jogged down the stair and out to Akano where he stopped to give him the phone. "It's cold so call them after I've have helped you in" He said and then without a warning grabbed his boyfriend under his arms and placed him on the stone chair to then lift up the wheelchair and help his boyfriend up and down on it once again. Thereafter he opened the door and rolled him in to then close it.

 

"Are you hungry? I can make some food if you want". The young student disappeared out in the kitchen, already on his way to the refrigerator to check what he could use to cook dinner.

[Zombie_In_A_Box]

Akano let out a soft gasp as he was picked up - and then, thank god, placed back on his wheelchair. The red head rolled his eyes as he grabbed his phone and huffed. "Stop doing that! Dammit, it's uncomfortable when you just do it without even warning..." He mumbled out in slight irritation as he rolled off to the kitchen after his boyfriend. His golden eyes slowly trailed off to the phone - he remembered telling the doctor he'd take the treatment once he got enough money... Apparently, he'd only have to pay half the price because of his health insurance.

 

The DJ sighed softly and shook his head at the question with a light smile on his face. "Nah, unless it's something light. I got enough food in the hospital... But actually, some salad would be nice." He said with a smile as he moved to the living room to call the number he'd gotten from his doctor. The chat didn't take that long - and it seemed that he would get there later today, then finish up tomorrow. It sounded great - he wouldn't have to wait too long to go around the house easily.

[Keru-chan]

He listened and then smiled. Softly. Vaguely. Almost not noticeable. And certainly not for his boyfriend. He closed his eyes, nodded and then spoke "Alright". But he didn't move an inch before a few seconds had passed and he was sure that Akano was busy. Slowly he took out vegetables as tomatoes, cucumber and other things that he thereafter washed with water and started to cut into small pieces. Thereafter he took out a bowl from one of the cupboards. Cutlery and a glass. And so he was finished. Just like that. And it felt like it hadn't taken more than a minute to prepare. He placed the bowl filled with the salad on the table, the glass and the cutlery. Then he dragged the chair away and positioned himself on the other side of the table. Sighed and rested his cheek on the cold, flat surface.

 

He wondered, if Akano still remembered that his birthday was coming soon. Well it wouldn't be surprising though if he had forgotten it. After all, he never used to make a big deal out of it. His birthday was just another day in his life.

[Zombie_In_A_Box]

Akano soon came back into the kitchen and smiled softly at his boyfriend when he stopped at the table. "Hmmm... It feels really weird not having to sit down on a chair anymore..." He muttered out more to himself than to the other as he reached out for a bowl to put in some salad, which required him to move even closer to the table - yet he succeeded! The red head seemed almost proud of himself as he grabbed a fork and leaned back as he began eating - this was already an achievement for him.

 

Akano let out a few hums as he closed his eyes and ate - until his phone rang. Blinking a few times, he put the bowl away and answered, his face immediately showing excitement - he already got a job request. And it seemed that someone would both pick him up and drive him back home! The red head grinned widely as he answered quickly, then looked at Yukio with a wide grin on his face. "I'm gonna work Friday evening~" He said almost proudly.

[Keru-chan]

Quietly, the other one observed how his boyfriend returned from the living room. Akano was truly strong. Being able to overcome every problem and obstacle. Why couldn't he be like him? The student drew a deep sigh, let his eyelids fall down and then vaguely smiled as he listened to the familiar voice. Then suddenly, everything was interrupted by his boyfriend's phone. And the boy revealed his light blue eyes to then let his gaze rest on the face that lit up with excitement and happiness. Thereafter, the news came. And they pierced his heart in the form of a sword. Friday? He thought as he felt the sadness well up inside of him. But instead of showing it he drew a deep breath and let his lips form a smile. "That's great Akano!" He said. Smiling at his boyfriend even though he on the inside was being destroyed.

 

Friday. His birthday. Well, it hadn't been anything special before so why did he suddenly get so emotional? Why did it feel like he was expecting something? Strange. It hurt to smile. But he wouldn't let such a trivial thing as his own emotions destroy Akano's happiness. As long as he was okay. As long as he was happy. Then he himself was complete. He didn't need anything else but that. But then why did he want to cry? He lowered his gaze and drew a hand through his blonde hair to then sigh. He was being ridiculous. Yukio looked at the clock and then suddenly stood up. "I should go home and study. I have an test on Wednesday". Test? Wednesday? What was he doing? Lying? To get away? But he couldn't stop. "I'll come by tomorrow okay?" He smiled and then walked up to his boyfriend's side and gently cup his cheek and kiss him on the other. Softly. Then he directed his steps toward the door. And noticed that the feelings only got stronger for every step that he took. Don't cry Yukio! He screamed to himself in his thoughts and somehow managed to leave the house. But directly after he had closed the door he sunk down in a crouching position, hiding his head with his arms as he clenched his teeth. Don't cry..

 

It took a while for him to get home since he walked. But when he finally reached the building he didn't have any strength to do anything else but to unlock his door and then close it. He didn't say anything to the old couple that lived beside him that friendly greeted him. He didn't take in the post. No, it was just the straight way to the bed. And there he suddenly was, holding a photo of himself and Akano in his embrace as he stared up in the ceiling. He wanted to cry. But suddenly the tears didn't want to appear. He did certainly not understand himself.

[Zombie_In_A_Box]

Akano blinked a few times as he stared at his boyfriend - he could see the sadness even though Yukio was hiding it... He felt bad for lying- well, mostly not saying the truth. The red head smiled softly as he nodded at the blond's words and chuckled. "Alright, let's hope I don't fall down anywhere." He joked, not showing any hint of the guilt or sadness. This "job" he got - it was a plan from since he was in the hospital. The party was meant for Yukio's birthday, and he was even working on a very special gift... He had to get him come there somehow.

 

Akano let out a satisfied sigh when he finished the salad - and then it hit him. He couldn't go upstairs to his bedroom, he couldn't even get out of his wheelchair... And he really had to pee. The red head slapped his forehead with a hand as a loud groan left his mouth. He should either get Yukio live here with him... Or get some kind of an assistant... Wait, wasn't there some number where he could get one? The DJ hurried to his phone as he groaned softly and immediately called - in less than half an hour there was a middle-aged guy who was supposed to help him out in the house. Gosh, Akano never thought that he would be this satisfied by peeing. Weird.

[Keru-chan]

The boy fell thereafter fell asleep like that. With the photo in his arms and curled up in a small ball, still wearing clothes as morning then arrived. He had a terrible headache and his hair stood in all directions as he left the photo on the bed and with a tired groan left for the bathroom to take a shower. Thereafter he went to the university. His mind was in a total chaos and his boyfriend's words still lingered in his mind as he proceeded with going to the first lesson.

 

When the day then finally ended the sky had turned slightly rose red with strokes of orange and purple. And even though Yukio just wanted to return to his bed and die in his ocean of depression he instead took the first buss to Akano's place. He had promised him that he would come today. And it would certainly be strange if he didn't come. Because he always held his promises. And he always did what he had said to someone. That was him. Besides, he couldn't let something like that destroy the bond they shared. He had already broken it once. He wouldn't let it happen twice. Going up the stairs he placed his hand on the handle and then pressed it down. Entered the house and closed the door behind him. And as he took off his shoes he parted his lips and spoke. "Akano? I'm here now".

 

Of course he knew that it would be much more effective if he just moved in. But before he had never really considered that something that was possible. But now. Now when Akano needed him he wouldn't have to fear to be lonely in this big house. So therefore he decided to tell him. Or to be more accurate, bring it up as an suggestion. "Akano?" He continued after having taken off his jacket.

[Zombie_In_A_Box]

Akano was so thankful to the man who was his assistant. He stayed through the night, helped him take care of everything and even made breakfast! And it actually tasted amazing! The red head spent a lot of time chatting with him, asking about his life and telling about his own; as well as Yukio. The man was named Bob - he was 34, and in the morning he even got his clothes to Akano's house so he could stay for however long he needed. The man who was installing the device to help him through the stairs was also here - it wasn't that bad being disabled, if you had enough proper help.

 

The first person to greet Yukio wasn't the DJ himself, but Bob. He smiled gently and nodded towards the blond. “I'm guessing you're Yukio? I'm Bob, your boyfriend asked me to come yesterday to help him in the house.“ He explained softly as he smiled once more and glanced back where Akano appeared from, a wide grin on his face. “Hey babe~“ He greeted with a chuckle as he rolled closer to him - Bob took the hint and walked off. “Hey, about that job on Friday, can you come with me? Bob won't be able to go and I think I'll need someone with me on the first time. Please?“ He asked with hopeful eyes. Gosh, if this would only work out...

[Keru-chan]

The one that appeared to welcome him was definitely not the one he expected it to be. Instead it was a middle-aged man that smiled friendly against him. His light blue narrowed slightly and then he smiled back. Mostly because he wanted to be politely. "Ah, thank you for taking care of Akano" he said and bowed to then notice his boyfriend that came rolling in his wheelchair as 'Bob' walked away. He smiled, but more whole heartedly as he leaned down to the red hair and gave him a light kiss on his cheek. "On friday?". Yukio froze slightly and scratched the back off his head.

 

Friday. He still couldn't seem to let go of the fact that they would nit be able to celebrate his birthday completely. But still, he would be happy as long as he could be with Akano. "I guess so" he then answered the other one and broke his thinking face expression by smiling vaguely. "Oh, Akano.." but the boy quickly cut himself off. He had been on his way to ask if he could stay at his boyfriend's place but maybe he would just be in the way when he had Bob. "It was nothing..I just wanted to ask if I could stay here for a few days, y'know help you and spend time with you but.." he laughed but on the inside he was being tortured to the fullest. "Bob is here so I'll probably just be in the way".

[Zombie_In_A_Box]

Akano mentally screamed out in victory. It worked! Plan: Celebrate Yukio's Birthday is underway! The red head smiled softly as he nodded and sighed out. “Thanks, I wouldn't know what to do without you!“ He said with a light chuckle. The DJ was mentally cheering for the fact that Yukio said yes - god, he couldn't wait to see his reaction to the surprise!

 

However, the following words made him confused. Really confused. “What? No! Babe, you should come live here! Do you know how awkward it is to ask him to help me pee?“ He complained, a small frown on his face. Really... Having another guy help him pee - that itself was really weird. When the guy was a stranger, it was even disturbing. “I mean, I need someone to help me out with the most basic stuff... And it's really weird to ask him for everything...“ He muttered out, something close to a pout on his face.

[Keru-chan]

Yukio only quietly observed how his boyfriend's face changed, clearly confused. Then he burst out the word, made him slightly wince and then vaguely smile at Akano who continued. Somehow, hearing this cheered him up. "Okay okay, I got it. I'll stay then" he replied and then let out a short laughter before gently placing his hand on his boyfriend's head and ruffled his red hair. Lovingly. Then he leaned down and softly embraced those familiar lips of his. "I'll get my things later then". After that he straigtened his back and walked out to the living room. "So, is there something you wanna do?" He said and turned around to his boyfriend.

 

Maybe it didn't matter if they weren't going to celebrate his birthday. After all, he would at leasr get to be with him. And that was in his opinion better than nothing.

[Zombie_In_A_Box]

Akano let out a huff when his hair was ruffled and sulked for a short while. “Don't do that... I feel short...“ He mumbled out under his nose as he followed his boyfriend into the living room. Really, one of the things he hated most in his situation was being short. He was tall - well, used to be. The red head sighed softly as he stopped the wheelchair, a small frown on his face. He didn't bother Yukio with complaints anymore... He didn't want to make him feel even worse.

 

The DJ tilted his head as he heard the question and breathed out, thinking for some time. “Hmmm... I don't know, why don't we just ask questions about each other? It's been awhile since we last did it... And I'm sure things have changed~“ He said softly as he smiled and reached out to take Yukio's hand into his own. “What do you think?“

[Keru-chan]

The boy closely studied the photographs in the shell before him. There were many with Akano and his family on. Why had them never taken a picture of themselves? Well they had but only on their phones and such. He agreed quietly to his boyfriend's suggestion to then suddenly get his hand embraced by Akano's. Yukio smiled kindly hand hugged the hand back with his own. "Sounds good. A chance for me to get to know you better than before I guess" he tilted his head slightly and then released the hand. "So do you wanna begin or should I do it?". He had nothing to hide so it didn't matter to him wether Akamo wanted to start or not. But the question was, did Akano have something he wanted to hide? Only the thought of that made him go back to that night and his ex girlfriend. How many had he actually dated before him? And would he himself be able to take it in that case?

[Zombie_In_A_Box]

Akano smiled softly as he carefully entwined their fingers together and slowly breathed out. "Yeah..." He agreed quietly, his eyes looking somewhere far away, into nothing. "I have a very simple question for the beginning~ What's your favorite song?" He asked with a smile as he tugged Yukio towards the sofa so he would sit down. He had to find out everything he needed before Friday... Today was Wednesday, he only had a bit over a day. The red head looked at the blond with a smile as he waited for his answer - the song Yukio chose would definitely be the one that would play when he first entered the party. Akano planned on getting away from his boyfriend in the party a bit, so he could start everything and wish him a happy birthday - he was going to make sure no one would say anything before the time was right.

[Keru-chan]

The student just warmly smiled and answered the lovingly gesture but once again slightly hugging his hand as he then slowly sat down on the edge of the sofa and looked his boyfriend in his eyes with a small frown. "Favourite song?" He said and then drew a hand through his blonde hair as he thought about it. There were many good songs out there. And if the truth was going to be told he had many favourites. But just one? "Maybe...I don't know..Rather Be with Clean Bandit?" He said and then let out a short laughter afterwards. He then got serious once again but a smile remained on his lips as he held both of Akano's hands. "Since you started with a simple question I'll also start with one. What's your favourite colour?". This was pretty enjoyable. If only, they could be together forever. If only life wasn't complicated and full of hardships. If only he hadn't been so jealous that night then everything would've be alright at this time. What had he done against the one he loved?

 

He swallowed the lump that suddenly had appeared in his throat and continued to look at his boyfriend. Ignored the depressing thoughts.

[Zombie_In_A_Box]

Akano blinked and let out a soft chuckle when he heard the answer. He wasn't too sure if that was what he expected... No, definitely not. What the red head did expect for was a calm, slow song - maybe a sad one, for some reason. It was how he saw Yukio at times - loving, calm, sad. Those were also the things why he loved him. If the blond wasn't like that, he wouldn't even be him.

 

"Hm? Uhm... Yellow! It's a really happy color~" Akano answered with a somewhat goofy grin as he looked at his boyfriend lovingly. "Then... What's your favorite book?" He asked randomly - maybe, just maybe he could also get Yukio a book for his birthday... But probably not. Nah, who gifts books to a nineteen-year old? Alright, maybe people do, but he didn't want to look lame...