Shards of Sanity 「PRIVATE RP」 Phanto feat. Saga

[Phanto77]

His usual migraine faded soon enough, although there was another pain at the base of his neck. He was not ailed with a migraine now. What was wrong with him?

 

Without thinking, he turned and grabbed the man's arm to stop him. "Bathe? I can't, I have no change of clothes, I don't know where, and I", he paused, "I don't trust you."

 

"You gave me your word. If you won't keep it, I will take my leave."

[Saga]

That was surprising.

Shougo averted chin to the male's direction, as if silenced by how the other acted. Never he'd imagine Hsin would dare to touch him, what to say to pull him by arm.

 

Bathe? I can't, I have no change of clothes, I don't know where, and I...I don't trust you.

You gave me your word. If you won't keep it, I will take my leave.

 

So sincere, the man was. Shougo averted his whole body to him, glancing over the hand on his arm. Then back at the other,

- As I can see you are neither eye-less,leg-less or tied. Not to mention you are in a perfect shape to protect yourself. Correct me if wrong, - he sounded in a way insulted by the not trusting part - ..isn't this the best you can ask off a psychopath?

 

Harukami captured the hand before the man even tried to retreat it,

- Scared for your life or for your body? - he leaned forth with a melodic voice but still whispered - In fact, I can help you with your worries.

 

He held back, he really did. The long haired male dragged Hsin once again after, this time the destination was the bathroom.

[Phanto77]

Hsin was tired of being pushed around. He wrenched his hand from the man's grip, stopped in his tracks and asked quietly but incredulously, "Where are you taking me? This is absurd. You said you'd talk to me. How long am I staying here?"

[Saga]

He stood with back turned at Lou; sick of all.

- You try to be nice, you are not acknowledged. You try the hard way, you are hated. Humans are truly disgusting. - monotonous he mumbled under his nose. It was like the other side of the coin. He really snapped and within two seconds he turned to pull the male by the hair. He knew he disliked it, that was the point - to not like it.

 

- What I intended to do? You really love living in the past, don't you? - bull's eye.

 

Haru walked out the garden, using force to bring the boy in the living room where a very interesting S-shaped sofa completed the modern design. He threw the male to it, not caring if he'd land on it or on the floor by it. Shougo loosened his tie, his eyes dispassionate,

- You have five seconds to start undressing. Trust me, it'd be nothing like in the safe-house.

[Phanto77]

He grunted loudly. a sound he only made once before. The hand in his hair was painful, especially when Haukami started to pull him by it. He didn't dare pull back.

 

When other man pushed Hsin onto the sofa, the rim hit him painfully in the middle of his back and he slid to the floor. When he looked up at his patient-his jailer-the man he had met was gone, eyes devoid of emotion. What did he want him to undress for? Hsin could probably guess, but then he could never "unguess".

 

He backed away slowly, still sitting on the floor, Shougo advancing on him. He held up his hand gracefully and whispered, "No, Shougo. Think." Tears started gathering.

[Saga]

The man eyed the hand stretched as the last standing wall; he caught it with his just to help himself and tie it with his own necktie to the pole standing by the sofa - it was the leg of a small iron table with Chinese ornaments for decoration but weighted quite some. He let the other hand free - not it would bother him even if he was untied.

 

The male fell silent, whatever Lou tried to make him talk to him would be of no meaning. Haru was hard to reach once he lost it; with a harsh tug buttons flew around them - he tore Hsin's shirt exposing the skin to air. Beautiful body, as he assumed it to be.

[Phanto77]

Hsin hadn't felt fear in very long time. Until today. Its coppery taste filled his mouth to its proverbial brim, while a lead ball settled into his stomach. He blamed himself for this. He had a certain leeway when it came to his patients, even the criminally insane. It was a fault that even Nagasawa warned him against. He was completely against having killers in the same room as Hsin, let alone have them in there unrestrained with him. Nagasawa felt the urge to protect Hsin, for some reason. After all, he was going to marry his sister.

 

The tie at his wrist was not particularly tight, but the kind that would be a bitch to work loose, which would also take time. Time he didn't have. He pulled at it almost hysterically. It was a silk tie, and silk left rug burns if you pulled on it. He knew from experience, thanks to knife lady.

 

His shirt split down the middle like the red sea, buttons catapulting everywhere. He inched away for some reason, although knowing it was pointless.

 

He whispered uncomfortably, his dry-eye tears falling but getting stuck on his high cheekbones, "Why?"

[Saga]

Haru glanced over the man; the hardest 'why' he has ever been asked. He stood on his knee (one to imagine how unromantic kneeling could be), hand reached to caress the chin of the man. The skin was smooth; thumb moved upwards to feel the roughness of dry lips but it was a no-worry thing. He sank his thumb into Lou's mouth, not really afraid of being bitten as long as he did wet these a piece of art lips.

 

With mark or not he eased his eyes at Lou and the other four fingers did what he intended to do - dislocating the male's jaw.

- How does it feel? - he spoke - To want to speak but to be able not?

 

A sharp rhetorical question, seemed he was good at these; Shougo retreated his thumb to get on feet before the man, hand harsh on the out-of-your-privileges part, the hair. He pulled Lou by the hair to tilt the head up. The level Lou was, was pretty alarming one - Haru's crotch.

- But I guess hostages don't need to speak.

 

He was partly excited but still not hard enough, and honesty to be put on the round table - he wanted to come over these lips, that face...and ah, these lovely eyes. Akame was a nickname for a reason, he loved eyes. Honest eyes.

The silence was embracing both before broken by the pull of zip, he indeed intended to fuck Lou's mouth. Hard.

[Phanto77]

He gasped in pain, no sound coming from his mouth from the shock of having pure pain shooting from his jaw. The tears flowed and flowed, 'til they marked a stream of wetness on his cheeks.

 

The grip in his hair hurt even more than his jaw, because it not only hurt his head, it hurt his heart, dissecting into little peaces.

 

He tried moving his head away from the incoming flesh, yet none of his devices had the stamina. His heart began to pound.

[Saga]

His still free hand caressed the marked by tears left cheek of the man, coldly staring at the so said sight. The mouth was so welcomingly opened, he moved free hand to his crotch to grab the arising from adrenaline, warm organ. A stroke or two, he wanted to postpone it a few more seconds, for the male to grasp completely how humiliated he was about to be.

- Wishing to be dead now? - Haru asked out of curiosity but never really wanted to hear the honest answer to it, he traced the glans of his member against the male's bottom lip. It send him a rather pleasant jolt upwardly his stomach, how stimulating it was.

 

Once he dubbed half of the pulsing organ into Lou's mouth, he enjoyed the slipper sensation - dislocated jaw meant hard to swallow even own saliva. He pushed deeper, eyes refusing to close. He wanted to see the side of Hsin once he was abused but not only physically - mentally as well.

 

His hand retreated from the hilt to move in synchrony with the hand gripping at the silky hair, he placed them tenderly to guide the male's head. Sinking deeper and ever so deeper, he pushed it into the back of the throat - the base barely visible. He knew very well Hsin couldn't breathe well with the cock blocking his air-path but still kept it buried into the softness of these walls. A faint thrust even though he deep-throat'd him enough already; he did it on purpose. Lou had to feel that certain irritation that gagged him to the point of throwing up. Before it went messy and ugly, Shougo moved away from the sensitive spot, letting the length feel all the way of pulling-motion. Slow and deep, the pace could be picked anytime but for now - he wanted to draw his own shape into Hsin's throat, making sure he'd never forget the sensation of having cock up his throat.

[Phanto77]

Hsin did want to be dead. Only thing is, it's the way he always was. He feared not death before he met Harukami. He feared not death when he woke up this morning, disappointed when it hadn't come for him in the night. He feared not death now. Wishing too strong a word, he accepted it.

 

He looked up at the man swimming in euphoria. He looked and he tried to ignore his painful jaw, to ignore his trouble breathing, to ignore his nagging gag reflex, to ignore the humiliation and embarrassment of the situation. And he did, he ignored. Like he ignored Tracy, Nagasawa, his patients.

 

Haru's cock invaded further and cut off Hsin's air almost completely, and he clawed at the floor, opening and closing his eyes. He was on the verge of choking. He decided to not let that happen. Dr. Hsin Lou, PhD, Masters, prodigy and genius, forensic psychiatrist, wealthy, handsome, and desirable. Will not die with a cock in his mouth like a necrophiliac rent boy.

 

Hsin closed his eyes and flipped the switch. For the duration of this humiliating ordeal, Hsin Lou was not home.

[Saga]

The abdomen muscles tensed, he felt the friction burning him from within; lips parted to pant away the held back gasp. Eyelids eased while the other man was in pure agony. Shougo's fingers tangled around the silkiness of the dark strands of hair, he pulled Lou's head away from his member but yet having the tip in a butterfly-touch with Lou's bottom lip. It was hard, angered and pulsing flesh, dripping from saliva and pre-come.

 

Shougo saw the man was about to shut himself in, as if it was a mind reboot process, or even better - safe mode. The long hair man felt the wetness of perspiration roll off his chin, slow thrusts were really control-consuming, especially when he wanted a certain angle hit.

- Heh, - he exhaled it from the chest, - ..and who was the one with future of a 'drooling retard '?

 

In fact, it wasn't to mock on the other. Haru never wished it that way, but yet...he thought the very same thing once he killed these men. He guessed, he was really sick.

 

With a sudden ram, it was like a wake up call. He hit abruptly the back of the soft walls, cutting the air out of the blue. But no, the pain wouldn't end there, the male grind-ed and abused the place with force. His jawline contracted at the urge to come. The glans felt so teased, tickled in a smooth and pleasing way - he needed to come. But that was why he tensed his all body to hold back; if anything, Lou wouldn't get rid of that soreness for a few days, for sure.

 

He stopped moving the man's head as if it was a dead pan-end to bump against, he rather wanted to force all these abusive rams into the man's backside throat where one could taste,smell,breathe. The most important processes, he'd fill them with his own trace and presence. And if Lou thought 'safe mode' could work once you were about to be suffocated - terribly mistaken. Shougo did rub now and then after series of quick and rough thrusts, keeping himself buried deep until the man's body jolted for air.

 

The last rub was pretty different however; Haru hips felt Lou's cheeks brush against the lil' exposed skin he had, so deep he sank into the wetness. It felt awfully damp, almost like the transparent and liquid saliva went thick and web-like, inside the mouth and against the throat. He held it there until the man would start flail hands or try to escape to 'gain' his time for a gulp of air. But no, Shougo held the head tightly pressed. One hand moved to side, to reach for the man's neck, he rubbed from outside his own cock. It felt good, to have his own "human condom"-like. Before the other could pass out from oxygen lack, Haru pulled but just then he allowed himself to come. That was right, while he was pulling he came. With his still throbbing member against these lips, he watched the thickness of juices dripping but too tick to roll off. Ever so tenderly he pushed a few more times into the mouth, but not really to thrust - just to feel some more of that hotness around his reddened tip. Hard breaths tore from his lips, he was sweating and all pierced by the pleasure, but still tenderly sliding in and out against that damp tongue.

- I must say, the best of the best, Doctor Lou. - husky voice commented away, it wasn't a praise, it was a reminder of how he fucked him like a whore.

 

Once he had himself away from Hsin, fixing his pants to guard any movement to be done by the other party, Shougo crouched down with elbows on knees. He lazily grinned,

- If only she could see you now, a man's whore. I suppose she'd never want to even marry you. - it wasn't supposed to be a bull's eye. It was a way to humiliate him more. If it was a bull's eye, ...his bad.

 

Shougo grabbed him by the hair, not allowing any spit of these lovely, thick juices or reach with the free hand to mouth. He untied the man but as soon as free of the iron table, he slammed the man onto back against the floor. He held him then strictly by the neck, eyes of the man once caressed him so tenderly were no where to be found. These cold, blue eyes were eyes of a brute.

 

He hooked the long material of silk around the neck, to tie it tightly to the heavy iron table. A press of a few spots around the joints, he had the body immobilized. What was the terror when one couldn't manage to move at all? One to wonder, but it wasn't unknown feeling to Shougo. He knew how it felt.

When the body was settled, he followed the drool path of the mixed liquid substances. With four fingers he slightly captured the web-like thickness from Lou's chin, playing with it by his lips with caresses before he sank the fingers into the mouth.

- I suppose you can have some more of the taste, Doctor Lou. It was, after all, once in a life time chance, as I told you. - he quickly smiled to have the brightness faded, - I believe you have two options, either to swallow it or have it there for quite some time. I doubt this thickness can be spit easily.

 

So said, the man rose on two feet to walk away.

[Phanto77]

So close. So close. He could've been with her now. And she'd want him. No matter what, she would want him.

 

"In your darkest hour, at your lowest point, you will always be my Sin. The Sin I would never renounce." Her voice filled him with absolute glee, her presence God's gift.

 

Hsin could've wept right there were he alone. Wept at death's shun. Not even death wants me, he thought, only she wants me.

 

Words, numerous ones, penetrated his mind, but he denied them. The other man-whose name he can no longer recall-was desperate to leave his mark, not knowing that Hsin's body was not of stone but of the sands of the Sahara, fleeting and short lived.

 

"Who was the one with future of a 'drooling retard'?"

 

"'ou, 'ou," he said, the words barely understandable, leaving behind a pain of effort.

 

His body spasmed at the air deficiency and he cursed it. Rejoice, my body, for death comes. But death never came.

 

Leashed to the table, he had not much to do but lie there. In his mouth a mixture of semen and saliva. He tried to swallow and found he hadn't the heart for it. So there he lay himself, prostrate.

 

His eyes betrayed no emotion. They rivalled not the coldness of The other man's, for they held no coldness in them, no heat or passion either. They simply held… nothing.

 

He decided to give the man his back and curl into himself, careful not to agitate his jaw. In his head, his secretary's voice played.

 

"Dr. Lou isn't in at the moment, please leave your name and number, and he will get back to you when he returns." Yes, Dr. Lou wasn't there. Dr. Lou was deep into his own. "Leave a message after the tone." Beep.

[Saga]

He shouldn't have brought him along; he knew it. He was never good with humans. Be it an animal or a damn, flower pot - he'd get along way better with 'them'. As soon as he got lost from the living room, he found a wall to lean shoulder on. That felt both pleasing and painful. He really didn't want to hurt that man, if Lou was like any other - he'd be missing the eyes now.

 

Haru realized that any touch from this man was like toxic for him; a jolting signal that could throw Shougo in and out as if he wasn't the 6'3" man he was, but some insignificant feather that could be blown to any direction.

The man reached his palm up, covering half of face. To avoid hurting him, seemingly he had to avoid being touched by that man. He sarcastically coughed a chuckle,

"Not like he'd touch me again."

 

Touché.

 

A few minutes passed and Shougo returned in the living room. Hsin looked lifeless, like a broken glass-hour and the particles were lost in somewhere Haru might never reach.

The doctor knelt down, not really sure he wanted to touch yet the man. He untied the silk off Lou's neck and settled his hand to the jaw - connecting it again.

 

He might have been sick in mind, but he really was a good doctor. The faster he worked, the less painful it felt. Then he pressed the spots again for recovering Lou's ability to move. With a lift, he helped the man up - it was such a mess. The natural watering of mouth helped some of the semen out. Shougo reached palm lightly to wipe away the mess, and in his eyes no content feeling of 'what he did' could be read.

- Lou? - he really wanted to help the other to the bathroom, give him spare clothes. At least this way the man could feel "less dirty"...probably.

 

Still, voice had that guilty note, bitterly stuck in his husky voice.

[Phanto77]

He was floating. He was not grounded, he knew that much. Hsin felt whole again, his jaw not as painful. His hair fell across his face, sticking to dried sweat, saliva, and cum. His body was stiff.

 

"Lou?"

The other man's voice penetrated his stronghold. No no no, you're not allowed in here, Hsin thought. He suddenly sputtered, coughing out droplets of an abominable mixture. He calmed down after a moment.

 

Eyes still closed, he groaned, "Mmm?", not knowing who he was talking to.

[Saga]

Haru moved the hair way, hopping the male's arm over neck. He helped him,walking to the bathroom upstairs.

- ... - he had nothing to say, what he could say?

 

Shougo just walked in the big bathroom that had a bathtub. He lowered carefully not to drop the still coming to it Lou, and slid the water running. He picked the temperature - neither cold and neither hot. It was just enough of warm to have a nice bath.

 

The long haired man turned to side, glancing over the male's neck. The place he bit was swollen and red. He checked a note, to take care of it later. But what was gentleness after brutality? He knew whatever he did now to show guilt would be meaningless, so he just shut all the words into the back of his throat and started undressing Hsin.

[Phanto77]

Running water. Waterfall? No, too low. Tap.

 

He felt hands undressing him, intruding hands. They were gentle, hesitant even, but still intruding. He pushed at them weakly, although they were determined to get his clothes off. He gathered his strength and opened his eyes against the bright light. The light wasn't all that bright, but to his eyes it was. He got some hair out of his face with a toss of his head.

 

Before him was a man he recognised. Harukami. Hsin looked the other man in the eye and pushed at his hands weakly still knowing that he couldn't stop Harukami in his condition, and said in a hoarse voice that was otherwise calm, "Oh, you again."

[Saga]

-------------------------------------

Rustle of clothes, Haru's white shirt neatly fixed by his mother. The boy stared at a butterfly he found for beautiful and reached hand to touch it, but then his mother gently captured the small hand;

- Haru-chan, you shouldn't.

- Why?

- Because beautiful things are most fragile.

- Fragile? - Haru tilted head curiously.

- Yes, they break easily and their beauty shall fade away.

- Then I will lock the butterfly to stay beautiful! - Haru's eyes glittered with determination but his mother chuckled.

- Oh Haru, dear, freedom is what makes them beautiful.

-------------------------------------

 

Taken back in time, Shougo carefully slid the shirt off the man's shoulders; why he recalled that? With a glance over the man, he noticed Lou was coming to it. Once their eyes met, Hsin refused these gentle hands again. In fact, he refused any touch. Haru wasn't dumb, nor stupid. It didn't take him much to do the deduction - Lou felt in a way hardly described as sympathizing the sick mind, not even pitying him. But Shougo was grateful. The last thing he'd want to be pitied, however if ever he let Lou sympathize him - he'd drag him lower than hell.

 

So making things as they are - it was better for Lou to stay as a hostage. And he knew the man would live, survive and get out because he wouldn't kill him - thus, most likely Shougo would be his key to success and fame. A survivor of a madly insane situation with a truly wanted criminal (psychopath to top it) would most likely make Lou a great psychologist in future. He chuckled at his small foreseeing moment.

 

Hands retreated the same way they retreated once his mother pushed them away from the butterfly.

- There is a key on the door, if you will. Bathe, the clothes are in the bedroom. Pick whatever you want. - with a raise he got up slowly, not wanting to startle the other with gestures made abruptly to catch up with.

 

- I will be in the library on last floor. There is food in the kitchen, in case hungry. Each door can be locked from inside only, take your time in whichever room, just don't enter the library. - with a glance over shoulder, Shougo nodded a bit and took his leave.

 

But then, he paused with hand on the door knob,

- If you got enough of what curiosity did to you, get lost. The car has enough of petrol to take you back in the city.

 

That was all he had to say.

 

Guilt was that could destroy an insane beast. Most certainly.

[Phanto77]

The water felt beautiful against his bare skin.

 

How dare he, Hsin thought angrily.

 

He finished his bath, drained the water, and went into the bedroom. A change of clothes similar to his-white shirt and black slacks-was on the bed. One looked a bit bigger than his size but he wore it anyway.

 

Fuck it, he thought. I am going up there.

 

When he got to the library, he leaned on the door frame and said in that parenting voice, "Curiosity? You insult me, Dr. Harukami."

[Saga]

Shougo was sitting on a big, leather chair with a book in hand. It was an old book, too visible to even question if it was his - and it wasn't. Doodles all over the worn by the time cover. Haru had the last floor fully as his library. One had to spend a whole day to walk around and check the main sections this library had in store.

 

Once he heard the voice, he sighed inwardly and let the book on his lap. The good thing was he was with back facing the other and didn't see how tempting the man looked in Haru's own clothes.

 

- You never learn, don't you? - he didn't move from his place. If he did, most probably the man would start thinking another torture or whatever he considered Haru's doings were would come. So he spoke from distance, not facing the other.

[Phanto77]

Hsin stayed where he is.

 

"You all but promised, Harukami. You can't just do that to me and…" He left the sentence unfinished.

[Saga]

Blue gaze stared at the window before, watching the beautiful sight-view towards the mountains. The green lost itself in these blue eyes, as if the sky imprisoned the forest.

- Then promise me one thing as well, once you walk out this place, you will write on your report 'sane'. Just like your boss wants. And once you do it, you will mention all my 88 victims and the way they were killed. - he already told Lou the victims were 89, but still he wanted to hide one single victim for a reason.

[Phanto77]

Hsin thought about it. It sounded good to him. Although one thing was not straight. He knew it was 89, but he didn't press the issue.

 

"Deal. One condition, though. All the time I am here, you are not to touch me. If you break that rule", he paused for second to show he was serious, "I will kill you myself."

[Saga]

How could you control insanity? Instincts? The male had a hard thing to vow to. He slipped his hand over the old book on lap, eyes in thoughts. It wasn't whether he could promise or not, whether he could manage or not, the question was more principle one.

 

- I am afraid I can't promise it, Lou. If you dislike it, I told you, get lost. - he paused, lifting gaze up - Or you can take the risk.

 

[Phanto77]

"How about you don't touch me, and we make it quid pro quo? You give me something, I give you something."