pandamonium Posted December 2, 2014 Share Posted December 2, 2014 I gave an irritated sigh. "Thank you, but at the moment, I need them." I paid for our items and headed out. I realized how mean I just sounded. "Sorry. Didn't mean to be an asshole." I opened the cartoon and pulled one out, lighting it and taking a deep drag. Man, I needed that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Funny Otaku Posted December 2, 2014 Author Share Posted December 2, 2014 "its okay i just want you to live long on go on a lot of adventures." I said quietly. I need at one point he would leave me....I just had this feeling...I was scared...Fuck it. I grabbed one from the carton, I'm a hypocrite. Ive had cigs before. I stuck my hand out for the lighter. "Cant let you smoke alone." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pandamonium Posted December 2, 2014 Share Posted December 2, 2014 I felt terrible. I'm just gonna bring this kid down with me. "No. I'm not sharing." I pulled the cigarette from his mouth. "If you wanna know...I'm kinda scared." I took another deep drag and exhaled. There's no point in keeping shit to myself. He's just gonna worry himself sick. I threw the butt. I put the carton back in the bag and slipped the lighter into my pocket. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Funny Otaku Posted December 2, 2014 Author Share Posted December 2, 2014 I put my hand on his shoulder... "Pass me a cig, i have had them before multiple times.....maybe you don't know all about me but I need a drag." I sat down.. "let's smoke and talk and see where it goes." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pandamonium Posted December 2, 2014 Share Posted December 2, 2014 I sighed. I sat down besides him. "I'm not giving you any of my cigarettes. I repeat: I'm not sharing. But we can talk." I opened the bag, taking out his tea and handing it to him and pulling out the beer. I opened one, chugging it and letting out a burp. "I didn't mean to worry you. You know...remember when I said I found committing suicide a pussy move? It's cuz I was actually considering it. I just don't have much to live for. Even traveling isn't enough sometimes. Like sometimes I feel so alive. Like this world is incredible. No doubt about it. Then sometimes it's like 'what's the point?' I'm just dragging this pathetic life for no reason. I can never be fully happy. Music, traveling, even love...it's not enough sometimes. That's why I'm scared. It scares me that I'm never fully satisfied." I chugged the rest of the beer and opened another. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Funny Otaku Posted December 2, 2014 Author Share Posted December 2, 2014 I grabbed his face and looked him in the eyes. "Im gonna teach you what a wise janitor once told me...it's okay to be sad..It's okay to cry, its okay to feel the way you are..You are who you are for a reason... he cane my life...right now everything seems so important but time rushes by like clip so you might as well enjoy the trip of life." I let go of his face... "Sorry.....You know i like you and stuff but if you don't want to stay with me you can leave...i've learned how to enjoy life even if i get beat up everyday..." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pandamonium Posted December 2, 2014 Share Posted December 2, 2014 I played with my can. Do I want to leave him? The thought of leaving him terrifies him. "I don't know. I'm terrified of leaving you. But...I'm so confused. I can't seem to find any answers to my questions. I'm just stuck." I chugged Mt beer and grabbed the carton. Trying to light it, but my shaky hands making it difficult. I grew frustrated and threw the cigarette away. I stood up and looked at the sky. "God! Help me find the answers I seek!" I stood silent for what seemed like ages. I gave a loud growl. "Fuck! Fuck! Fucking shit! Shitty shit shit!" I felt so feral. I just screamed and growled. Kicking the beer and the bag. I began to laugh. I'm so insane. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Funny Otaku Posted December 2, 2014 Author Share Posted December 2, 2014 I hugged him, tight tighter than ever before. "I'm here if you need me...If you want to leave i won't hold you back...just be okay..." I said. and squeezed tighter. he was warm and smelled of cigs and aochol. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pandamonium Posted December 2, 2014 Share Posted December 2, 2014 I stopped laughing. I just stayed motionless, panting softly. I felt tears on my cheeks. I began to sob, silently. "I-I...," I couldn't seem to be able to help him. I'm just clinging onto him. I promised to yeast him like royalty, to spoil him. I can't seem to even be able to help him when he needs it the most. "I need...help." I turned my head to look at him. "I've broken my promise." I have him a sad smile. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Funny Otaku Posted December 2, 2014 Author Share Posted December 2, 2014 I hugged him tighter. "You never broke a promise with me...I can't give you a lot of help but i will try my best...not matter what you dicided is okay, no matter what happens is okay. you can cry. i can hold you for as long as you want....you can do what you want..and you can just be your self..Im yours no matter what...you are perfect to me." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pandamonium Posted December 2, 2014 Share Posted December 2, 2014 After several minutes of us just hugging, I pulled away. He was too sweet and generous. I began to pick up the cans and the bag. "I want you to be selfish towards me. I want you to use me. I've used others in my past, I want you to use me in any way you desire." I stood in front of him. I reached for his neck and began to kiss him roughly. I pulled away. "In the meantime, I don't want to think. I'm tired of thinking. Lead me, if only for as long as I need it." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Funny Otaku Posted December 2, 2014 Author Share Posted December 2, 2014 I grabbed face face kissing him deeply and rough. I wrapped my arms around his neck deepening it.I loved this man i have issues being selfish. I relised him. "Look I'm not here use you....im not like the others." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pandamonium Posted December 2, 2014 Share Posted December 2, 2014 "I know. You're a lot sweeter. If anything, I'm a selfish dick. That's why I have such a desire to spoil you." I noticed a cool breeze and sighed. "We should head back. Thanks for being my shoulder to lean on. I wanna return the favor. So whenever you need me, I'll be here." I wasn't feeling as anxious as before. I geeky more relax and at ease. I felt like a giant weight was off my shoulder. I giggled. "Man, I feel a lot better. Like a weight's off my shoulder. Thanks." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Funny Otaku Posted December 2, 2014 Author Share Posted December 2, 2014 "Your Welcome...Im here for you.." I smiled and held his hand.. "You know I forgot to tell you I turn 18 next week.." I was kinda happy that meant i was ann official adult. "I was hoping we could hang out that day...It's kinda big for me." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pandamonium Posted December 2, 2014 Share Posted December 2, 2014 I nodded. "Yeah, that sounds cool. I'd love to hang out with you on your birthday. There's nowhere else I'd like to be than with you." I clung onto his hand. I yawned. That tantrum wore me out. "So, what ate you planning to do on your birthday?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Funny Otaku Posted December 2, 2014 Author Share Posted December 2, 2014 I didn't know what i wanted to do I just wanted to make sure i could chill with him. "I don't really know probably just get drunk together....tell some stories for your travels." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pandamonium Posted December 2, 2014 Share Posted December 2, 2014 I liked that idea. Not the drunk part, but everything else. I'm usually not much of a drinker, unless I'm stressed out something. I'm not sure if I'm ready to him that side of me. "Sure. Why the fuck not." I grinned. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Funny Otaku Posted December 2, 2014 Author Share Posted December 2, 2014 I smiled yay it was coming true. I was happy I held his hand tighter. I think we will definitely learn something's about each other. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pandamonium Posted December 3, 2014 Share Posted December 3, 2014 He seemed happy. That really made me happy. "Hey. Is there anything you want for your birthday?" I want to go something rally nice for him. It's his birthday after all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Funny Otaku Posted December 3, 2014 Author Share Posted December 3, 2014 "Yep your company. I haven't gotten anything for my birthday in years the most I got was Sasha homemade sculptures. She loved art and always tried to make me somthing." I loved her she was so sweet. I laughed. " your company is enough. Well and alcohol." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pandamonium Posted December 3, 2014 Share Posted December 3, 2014 I chuckled. "Fine. I'll get you a beer or something. You know...when I first talked to you, you seemed like such an innocent kid. Then the more I got to know you, the more I realized...you're not add innocent add you seem." I smirked. "You're full of surprises." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Funny Otaku Posted December 3, 2014 Author Share Posted December 3, 2014 "Im not innocent at all...I lost my vicinity at 13 and much more....people get the wrong thing like this poor kid he's so innocent but in reality..Im not...trust sme there was a time i was innocent..Sasha knew me back then..." I laughed. so many things I've done and yet i still give off that sweet innocent vibe? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pandamonium Posted December 3, 2014 Share Posted December 3, 2014 I laughed. "Oooh, man. I didn't lose my virginity until I was 18. If it wasn't for the fact that I left home, I'd still be the chubby virgin living in his parents' house, eating Cheetos and gaming all day." Wait. 13 seems kinda young. Did something happen? Or..I'd better just leave it at that. Or I'll be thinking about it, nonstop. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Funny Otaku Posted December 3, 2014 Author Share Posted December 3, 2014 "I canot imaine you as a chubby kid that sound so cute."I teird to imagine it awww Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pandamonium Posted December 3, 2014 Share Posted December 3, 2014 I blushed and nodded. "Yup. But I lost a ton over the years. Well, whatever." We arrived at his apartment. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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