Sword Art Online V2: Reboot and Reactivate (alexia__ and ~*~FaLlEn*SnOw~*~, Mature?)

[~*~FaLlEn*SnOw~*~]

He groans as Lance pulls out of him, and does as he was told, turning so he was on his hands and knees. Shivering as he was once again pushed into, the hands on his butt creating goose bumps. As he felt lips upon his his back, he let's out a shuddering moan.

 

The movements within him were slower and a bit teasing, as he felt his sweet spot brushed against over and over. He grasps the hand that had taken his own, linking his fingers with Lance's. His back curves delicately, his head tilted back a bit, his eyes closed almost all the way, open just barely so he was gazing from beneath his eyelashes. He felt as if things had gotten more intimate, and he sighs, saying Lance's name again.

 

"L-Lance...it...f-feels so...good..." He clasps tightly to the blankets beneath them. Moving his body underneath Lance, he felt his limbs trembling even more, but didn't want to stop.

[alexia__]

"Do you want more" he asked as he took in the others features. His hair a bit messy and his face completely flushed in a slight red.

The small body was covered in dark marks that made Lance feel superior. "I love you"

Lance's statement rung through the quiet room, and afterwards only the sound of breathing and gasps could be heard.

 

"I'll give you the world if you asked me" his arms wrapped around the other strong and captivating. It almost created seemed as if Shinji was a metaphor to Lance's world which was quickly coming to life

[~*~FaLlEn*SnOw~*~]

"Y-yes! I...want more!" He moans this loudly, his eyes now closed completely, his back arching even further. Despite the fatigue he was beginning to feel, Shinji didn't want it to end, not just yet. He wanted to keep on going, until his whole body felt like it was going to explode from the feeling of being so close to Lance.

 

Hearing the words from Lance, he lets out a shuddering whimper like sigh, and forces a smile onto his lips. "I...I love y-you too...Lance..." He says this, breathlessly, loving the sound of how the other said those three words. To him, hearing Lance say that, was everything. Never had he thought that such a saying could mean so much.

 

Then, the next comment Lance made makes his heart pound hard in his chest. Lance...would give him the world? It...was too good to be true, and yet the arms wrapped around him, holding him close, were all too real. "You...y-you mean it...?" He whispers, trembling a bit more than before. His head falls forward, and tears stung at his eyes, but he holds them back. No crying. Now was not the time. "Oh Lance...I love you so much..."

[alexia__]

"Shinji you're still hard" he whispers wih a chuckle. His hand moves down and begins stoking. Lance could only imagine how tired the boy must be, all the excersise must have his body burning, slowly he moves down and takes Shinji in his mouth. It worried Lance that if he continued with Shinji the would not be able to get up.

 

"Let's finish with this" he told the other. Slurping sounds cloud be heard as Lance skillfully sucked Shinji's erection.

[~*~FaLlEn*SnOw~*~]

At first a hand began to move across him, slowly stroking his erection, but then after a moment, he feels Lance's mouth upon him, making him groan. He was close, and he could feel it. He begins to tremble and quake, and then, with a long moan, he releases for the last time, his body was beyond exhausted.

 

"Oh...God...L-Lance..." He flops onto the bed, his whole body trembling from the experience. His breathing was ragged, and sweat shone upon his skin. His eyes close tiredly, he could not longer keep them open for a single second more. After a moment he begins to cough, wincing a bit. He pushed himself too far this time. "Crap..."

 

He coughs again, feeling as if someone was squeezing his lungs and throat. He didn't usually suffer from asthma, but after what they'd just done, it would be no surprise that he indeed was suffering. "L-Lance..." He gasps, forcing one of his eyes open. He gazes at the older male a bit, before falling half way asleep, still breathing raggedly. He was pleased at what had happened between them, but at the same time...he regretted that out of all the times, his asthma had to act up now. However, after taking deep, calming breaths, he was able to make himself calm down.

[alexia__]

"Here" he tells Shinji as he places his hand on the boys back and hands him an inhaler . "I had it made when I read your medical record"

 

After the insident with Shinji and the car, Lance had gone out and reviewed the boys record again. He had pretty much memorized all allergies, and body like problems. For example asthma.

"It's okay" he says "you'll be fine if you're with me"

 

Even though Lance had said that, he had gotten a good scare of what just happened and he gave himself a million claps in the back for having the inhaler in the night stand.

 

"Next time lets notch it down on the passion"

[~*~FaLlEn*SnOw~*~]

Accepting the inhaler, he uses it, and after a moment could breathe somewhat normally again. He felt a tad light headed, and leans against Lance, His eyes closing again. He hears Lance's comforting words, that he's always be there for him, and it made his heart lift happily, a tiny, tired smile tugging at the corners of his lips.

 

At the next comment, he laughs lightly, though instantly regrets it as pain shoots through his body, making him wince. "You're...r-right...I...g-got carried away..." He tilts his head to look up at Lance, forcing his eyes open, his vision blurred from how tired he was. He also felt sticky and grimy from all the sweat and everything else.

 

"I-it's too bad...really...w-we just took...a b-bath..." Sighing softly, he was amused at himself, thinking what he'd just said was humorous. "Ugh...I'm tired..." He leans more against Lance, not even having enough energy, and not really caring, that he was still naked. "I think...I'll just go to sleep now..." With those final words, he falls asleep, his breathing steady now, a faint smile still on his lips.

[alexia__]

Lance grabs Shinji's shoulders and lays him down on the bed. Grabbing a handful of tissues he cleans off Shinji and then himself, as for the sweat it would have to wash off in a morning bath.

 

His own body exhausted welcomes the soft cushions of the bed, once he's made sure Shinji is comfortable he lays down and closes his eyes. Although exhaustion did nothing good, that night Lance tossed and turned barely getting any appropriate sleep and when his alarm went off for running he grunted loudly and slammed his hard on the off button. Getting up he walks to the door and closes it softly behind himself. The kitchen light hurt his eyes terribly and they became slightly teary.

 

Soon the coffee machine was running and a quick toast cooking. He had gone back up to the room, showers and dressed in hospital scrubs. Today he did not have college classes but he was in hospital duty for some time. He stopped for a second and looked in the mirror, his eyes were red and terribly tired. His dark hair and blue eyes reflecting back at him.

"Never will I pass as Japanese" he told himself as he backed away.

He assumed Shinji was still sleeping and went downstairs to be slapped by a warm welcoming smell of coffee.

 

"Ugh" he said out of tiredness

[~*~FaLlEn*SnOw~*~]

During the night he slept well, not feeling as Lance tossed and turned. It was morning when Shinji stirs, not having moved once all night. Drool pools by his open mouth, his breathing soft snores. At first he stays asleep, but eventually he begins to wake up, and right as he did, he wishes he as asleep again. Right when he wakes up, the moment his eyes open he screams, his body in agony, pure and simple.

 

Tears fill his eyes, and he curls up into a tight ball, instantly regretting his desicion and uncurling, crying out for Lance. "Oh God it hurts...!" Even his first time hadn't hurt this terribly afterwards, the tears now spilling down his face, and almost instantly drenching the pillow beneath his head.

 

"LAAAANCE!!!"

 

He once again moves, but could not get far without having pain rack his body. He grits his teeth, sucking air through his teeth, trying not to panic. Even after getting beaten up the school bullies back at the high school he'd felt better than this. He groans, not only did his lower half hurt, but everywhere else hurt as well.

[alexia__]

The door to the room crashes against the wall as Lance slams it open and runs to Shinji. He copes the boy's face in his hands and forces him to look at him.

"Shinji what's wrong" he asks softly trying to keep the alarm out of his voice, his thumbs removing the tears around Shinji's eyes.

 

Once he was told of the pain, he helps Shinji of his back completely and warns him not too move. Reaching for a cream Lance begins to massage the lower region of the small back and then moves up to the neck. Lance grabs another portion of cream and proceeds to each leg.

"Its called lactic acrid" he tells the other as he continues, once more, to massage Shinji's back "its due to lack of exercise...I think we should work out together from now on" he suggests Shinji and his hands move to the boy's neck where black spots covered the white skin.

[~*~FaLlEn*SnOw~*~]

Shinji looks up into Lance's eyes, his eyes shimmering with the tears that fell down his face. "It hurts...I hurt so much!" He moans in pain, his breathing sounding slightly labored. Whimpering, he continues on trying to tell Lance what was going on, but he wasn't really able to say much, it hurt too badly.

 

As Lance then put something all over him, massaging whatever it was into his skin, he begins to relax somewhat, but was still in pain no matter what the other did to him. "Ex...Exercise? Work out?...Do I have to?" He asks, pressing his brows together, a frown tugging his lips. He didn't like exercise, he could barely keep up in Physical Education when he was in High School. He sighs, as Lance's hands reach his neck, the hands so gentle as it worked whatever cream Lance was using to help soothe his sore body.

 

"It hurts worse this time than last time..." He mutters, sniffling a tiny bit, and wiping away the tears with one of his hands, shivering a little bit now, as he was still naked from the other night. "I don't even want to move..." However, he knew he had to at some point. Like Lance, he didn't have class, but he had to do something other than laze about in bed all day. But really, did he? "Lance...how long will you be at the hospital?" He murmurs, staring at the blankets beneath them, twisting it in his hands. He hated being alone for too long, always fearing that something would happen to him when he was by himself.

 

He looks back towards Lance, his lips still in a frown, and a pouting expression on his face. To be honest, all he wanted to do was sleep, and cuddle with the other male, but he was not going to say anything. He hated the fact that earlier in their relationship he'd kept Lance away from his studies for so long, there was no way he'd ask for that from him again.

[alexia__]

"I know I know" replied Lance a hint of guilt in his voice and he continues to move around the other's body. "I will be there for sometime Shinji" he replies "But" says lance as he elaborates on the idea developing in his head "y-you could come with him"

 

And he soon saw all the defects in it "No, never mind" he quickly says. Suddenly it hit him why Shinji was this way to begin with, the letters.

 

"I don't want you here alone, not anymore" the fact was that who ever had dropped them knew where Shinji was and not too mention he couldn't keep the boy in the house like a cage. Quickly he thought over of things he could do, taking Shinji with him was the safest option but....

 

Sighing Lance sits on the edge of the bed and pinches with his fingers the bridge of his nose in frustration. His lack of sleep was stressful and made his mind go to all negatives, his eyes close and he breaths trying to think of a solution and Shinji wasn't the only thing on his mind, his medical assessments were so close he could touch them, and he had not spent a second studying.

[~*~FaLlEn*SnOw~*~]

Shinji could see the frustration in Lance's eyes, and he automatically felt guilty, and quickly looks away. "Um, n-never mind...I'll...be fine. You go...I'm sorry for being a bother..." He felt terrible for the stress that he'd caused the older male, knowing deep down it wasn't just him, but the fact that even a little of it WAS him, made him want to just disappear. "Um...if you want...I can come with...I promise I'll stay out of the way, and not cause you any trouble...I-I know don't like h-hospitals...But..."

 

He lays back down, his back to Lance, holding the pillow to him like one would hold a teddy bear. "If that's not an option...I'll be fine here..." The only thing he feared was someone showing up and leaving him another "present" behind, worse than the letters, but not quite as bad as what would be coming down the line. Even though there was school today, he knew they'd find some way to deliver their gift to him.

 

Hearing Lance sigh, he curls up slightly, pulling the blankets up over his body, and over his head. "I'm sorry..." He whispers, and shuts his eyes, willing the hot tears that had formed in his eyes to go away, not wanting to cry and make Lance feel like he was obligated to stay with him. "J-just go...you have things you need to do..." His voice felt choked in his throat, and he felt like his lungs were burning from the effort of not crying.

 

Hugging the pillow tighter, he falls silent, listening to see if Lance got up and left, or if he was still sitting there on the bed, trying not to imagine the look on the other's face. It tore his heart to see Lance like this. He sniffles quietly, and then sighs softly, ignoring as best as he could the pain that he could still feel. He had indeed thought going with Lance would be a nice change, but...he wasn't exactly sure if Lance would want him there.

[alexia__]

He slumps over what was now a ball of blanket and Shinji, he hugs it tightly but not enough for it hurt.

 

"You're so important to me" he says "I just don't want to leave you alone" his head ached as he closed his eyes. But he smiled as he remembered the previous night how he had awoken, for the fifty's time, and seen how peaceful Shinji slept at night. That brought him back a bit of calmness.

 

"Okay lets go" he said as he removed the blankets in one movement and lifted Shinji bridal style. Lance smiled brightly and kissed the figure in his arm.

Walking to the closet he sat Shinji in the office chair that had somehow gotten there and began searching for a pair of scrubs that were far beyond his size.

 

"Here Shinji, the light green color brings out your eyes" he says "I will keep you in my office all day and you can see the ships sail from the window outside" he says as his hand messes up the others hair.

 

He begins to walk towards the closer door but stops and looks back "You're not allowed to be sad" then disappears downstairs.

[~*~FaLlEn*SnOw~*~]

Shinji makes a sound of surprise when he was suddenly hugged while in the covers, and he hears Lance speak to him. Was he...really that important? He looks to Lance when the blankets were pulled from him, and smiles softly. "Okay..." He notices how gently that Lance was handling him, and he was truly grateful, because right now, nothing other than being treated like he was about to break would be able to feel like he wasn't being torn apart.

 

Sitting in the chair that he'd been carried to, he nods at the things that Lance said, and takes the clothing that were handed to him, and pulls the shirt on, wincing a bit as he rose his arms to do so. "Sounds like fun..." He replies, and smiles some more, looking forward to going to where Lance was.

 

Just as he was proceeding to pull the pants on, he glances up at Lance who had stopped in the doorway. "Well...okay...I'll try not to be sad...but no promises." Then Lance leaves, and he sighs softly. He was able to pull the pants on no problem, and forces himself to stand up, wincing again, his knees trembling. The scrubs that Lance was letting him use were, of course, way to big on him, and the bottoms hung on his hips despite the fact he'd tied the tie to it's maximum. And the shirt hung off his shoulder.

 

He walks carefully across the room to use the bathroom really quick, using the walls as a support, and when he was done, he washes his face off, running his fingers through his hair. Splashing cold water onto his skin, he leaves the bathroom, and then goes to the door way. "Hey...Lance?" He begins to walk out of the room, still leaning against the wall, glancing around. "When did you need to leave?"

 

Shinji was feeling a bit hungry, but he was sure he could wait a bit until they got to the hospital. "Lance?"

[alexia__]

"When ever you're ready" he screams back "I'll go get you now"

He carefully places two large cups of coffee in a carrying tray and runs up stairs to see Shinji dressed, he blushed madly at the sight. The outfit making the smaller boy look older but still quite young, it hung nicely around his body, and even if it was a bit too big it would be enough to camouflage with the other surgeons and doctors.

 

"Okay lets go" carrying the other they go downstairs, with an almost free hand he grabs his car keys and lab coat. As for the drinks he lets Shinji reach for them.

The drive was rather fast due to Lance's quick route escaping all the traffic. From the left the slowly rising sun could be seen as it hit the ocean. A massive building came into view some time after.

"Here it is"

 

 

A sign read

"Norman Memorial Hospital and Research Institute" in large golden leaders.

He hope Shinji didn't notice the rather large fact that Lance had been trying to hide, but if no one spoke anything than he would be safe.

[~*~FaLlEn*SnOw~*~]

Seeing the other blushing after seeing him dressed as he was, Shinji blushes as well, and smiles as he was pulled up into Lance's arms, and carried down the stairs. When Lance grabs the keys to the car, he picks up the tray of two coffees, stopping the other for a moment so he could pull on a coat since it was chilly that morning. He sits in the car, quietly sipping his coffee, which was (as Shinji had told him how he liked it a while back), loaded with sugar and milk, with a touch of vanilla creamer.

 

The drive didn't last too long, and they were pulling into the parking lot of a huge hospital, Shinji's heart speeding up at the sight, and he quickly looks away, his eyes narrowing, his eyebrows pressing together lightly. If he'd known... There were many different hospitals in this city, the one he'd been in before was just fine, but this one... He bites his lip, but takes a deep breath, trying to calm himself down. He looks out at the ocean, and smiles a bit at the way the sun shone upon it.

 

"Let's go in okay...?" He murmurs, getting out carefully as they parked, closing the door behind him. He wanted to hold onto Lance, but...would that be weird? Even though he could barely walk without support, he took a step forward, wincing, his hand holding tightly onto the cup holding his drink. "Lance? I was wondering...how the heck am I...going to get in? Am I just...going in...?"

[alexia__]

Quickly he averts his eyes so eyes contact with the smaller boy would not be made. "Ah...heh don't worry about that" he tells the other as they walk through, the security waving at Lance as the large double doors open.

The outside was terribly cold far more than it had been that morning when they left the house, the snow was beginning to pile up, but luckily it wasn't deep winter and it would take some time before large snow could be seen around.

 

The insides of the first floor were white and blue, many of the doctors there wore a black and gray scrub; many of them waved at Lance as he walked by.

 

"Good Morning Dr. N" said a cheerful older woman as both boys approached another set of crystal doors.

"I'm taking a partner in today" he tells the older officer. Soon those doors too were opened and they walked into an elevator to the left.

 

"We are going to the 18th floor" he told Shinji as he sipped his coffee, his other free hand extends to slightly touch Shinji's who he found was slightly white.

 

The doors opened on the 16th floor letting in 2 other men

"Morning Dr.N" they saluted Lance; the men worse a white pair of scrubs.

 

Once at the 18th floor they exited, the building was quiet and almost dark with dim lights all over, at the far end a woman sat in her desk chatting away, he scrubs light blue.

 

"yess. yeess *laughs* oh hold on... Good Morning Dr. N!" she says happily "they requested you in floor 4" after this she returns to her call.

 

Lance's office was large and comfy, there were 3 large couches to the lefts an a large desk surrounded by books to the far end. The room was a larger mimic of the office back home, but it tripled in books and window. On the back of the desk a colossal window stood proudly giving view to the now shiny ocean.

 

"The office doesn't even look like its part of the hospital" says lance at Shinji. Everything was wooden in the room except for the couches and chairs.

"Close your eyes" he whispered to Shinji as his hands grab the smaller boy's and walk him slowly to the large desk "Open" he said. Lance was showing Shinji a medium picture of their boat date a few weeks back. It was a lively colored picture frame with the two of them.

[~*~FaLlEn*SnOw~*~]

As they enter the hospital, all Shinji could do to keep from turning and trying to dash away was to think if Lance, and how he'd feel if he'd suddenly run away right then. He grits his teeth, staring at the floor as they pass several people, trying not to think of the last time he'd been in this hospital. It wasn't a memory he wanted to think of right then, but as they continued to walk, the sounds of their footsteps around them, that's all he could think about. And it made him want to scream, or run away. But he does neither things, instead, he stays walking by Lance's side.

 

Stepping into the elevator, he jumps slightly when his hand was touched by Lance, and he glances over at him, but looks quickly away, sure that the anxiety was clear in his eyes. He felt like he was about to die from his heart stopping, or his breathing giving way, as the pressure of his memory pressed more and more on him, invading his mind and thoughts, even as they exit the elevator once again, and start walking.

 

Entering a rather spacious looking office, Shinji glances around, barely hearing the words that were said to him by Lance, mutely nodding at the comments, obediently closing his eyes as he was told. When his hand was taken, he does something he hadn't done in quite some time. He flinches at the touch, his heart skipping a beat. Swallowing nervously, he allows himself to be led a bit into the office, and then looks down at the picture upon the desk.

 

Seeing that picture there, and all the tension from being in a hospital that haunted his dreams, made him react a bit more than one would expect. Tears sting his eyes, and then fall like rain, as he begins to cry. He covers his face with his hands, his fingers trembling, his head bowed in utter defeat. His shoulders were slumped, and right then, he no longer cared. He didn't care if he was thought of as a baby, or weak. Right then, he just needed that moment to cry.

 

"Oh God..." He groans, falling to his knees, and grabbing a hold of the edge of the desk with one of his hands. "I'm so sorry Lance..." He apologizes, over and over, not wanting the other to think this was his fault in any way. It had been, as of that year, almost four years since he'd been in that hospital. Four years it's been since that incident. Four years, four PAINFUL years since the S.A.O. tragedy. And four years since Rai had died.

[alexia__]

He freezes suddenly, his eyes on Shinji's crying face, the way his shoulders shook, the way his small hands were clenched together; exhaling Lance feel a harsh pounding by his chest, not exactly in his heart but more to the right bottom. His breath came in short and painfully exited his body, at one point he concluded that even not breathing would be better for him.

 

He did not approach Shinji, how could he?, he had been doing it all this time. He did not move, for what would it change? since he kept fucking up either way. Lance's eyes felt heavy and every time he blinked it hurt feeling like time had stopped, he could no longer hear Shinji's sobbing, it was all muted almost fake, he watched the boy as if he was not really there both someone else, someone that was not part of the duo but a third party some distance away.

Color around him faded slightly; maybe it was the sun that had hit his eyes, but he closed his eyes for a moment and saw red then a bright white.

 

A loud ring came from the office phone, but he didn't move, for how could he? The call died and soon came in again. The rings feel like a never ending death march to limbo and his own legs feel jelly, his mind was falling into nothingness and as he took in the feeling of...

 

Failure he finally realizing how tired he was. How badly sleep came to him. How badly life had been to him.

"can't save your parents or your boyfriend now Lance" he told himself as if the mocking would bring back time, bring back what would never return, or return what time had never brought.

[~*~FaLlEn*SnOw~*~]

How long he knelt there, sobbing, he had no clue. A few seconds, or eternity, it would have felt the same either way. The tears just kept coming, no matter how hard he tried to make them stop. No matter what he told himself, they fell continuously from his eyes, and down his face. Why did this have to happen? Why didn't Lance just tell him? Why did he not just say something? As he was there, a numbness falls over him like being dumped into an bucket filled with ice water. This...this wasn't going to work.

 

The phone ringing snaps him from his thoughts, and he stands up, wiping away the tears from his eyes, some still falling even as he did this. He looks to Lance, but instead of seeing him...he looks right through him. For a moment he was quiet. Then, taking a shuddering breath, he forces himself to look up at Lance's face, his eyes strangely cold, the shine gone from them, no longer shimmering they way they normally did when he gazed upon the other male.

 

"I'm leaving. There's no way I can stay in the hospital where my brother died. Where I almost died." With that, he walks past Lance, after reaching out and placing the picture of them face down on the desk. Pausing by the door, his back to the other, he speaks up one last time. "We're not supposed to hide things from each other. We're supposed to TRUST each other. And yet...you hide this from me. I wonder what you were thinking when you decided to do that. Have a nice day, Dr. N."

 

His voice was unlike his own, harsh and cold, unfeeling. He leaves the office, and retraces the steps he'd taken to go up to the office, where he'd left Lance alone. And right now...he felt it was better that way. But as he stepped out into the cold winter air, he could feel his heart beginning to break, and he hurries away, trying to wipe away the fresh tears that had formed on his face.

 

As he walked along the sidewalk, a sudden noise reaches his ears. A car horn. "GO AWAY LANCE!" He screams, but then turns to face not Lance, but the surprised expression on none other than..."C-Chidori-san! I-I'm..!" "Hehe, it's fine. Come on, hop in. You look like you're about to turn in to a popsicle." Shinji nods mutely, and climbs into the passenger seat, putting on his seat belt as she drives away. "So, what are you doing out in the cold like this?" Chidori asks. "Nothing...really..." He mutters, staring out the window.

 

"Nothing huh..." She repeats softly, brushing a bit of her hair from her eyes. "Well...if you're doing nothing...how about going out for dinner tonight? My treat." He looks to her, surprise on his own face now. "A-Are you sure?" He asks, confused as to why she was asking this. "Of course I'm sure Shinji-kun. So, would you?" He nods, and she smiles. "Alright then. I'll pick you up at seven." After giving her his address, she takes him home, and he goes inside, waving. "See you at seven!" She calls, before driving off.

 

Heading upstairs to his room, he collapses onto his bed, and passes out, though before he did he turns his phone off. Right now...he didn't want to be bothered.

[alexia__]

Marching away from him slowly, it looked to him slowly, but it was all occurring too fast, was Shinji.

'Stop' he thought

 

'Please stop, if you leave...I'll die' he continued, but this was all being said in his head.

'Ple....' then it was all gone, all the thoughts, all and everything.Blank.

 

It wasn't the hospital that Lance had hid, it was the fact that... he was the Norman in the bright gold letters that read the name of the place in the welcoming sign. And not only that but a few weeks ago when he had double read Shinji's record he found his name printed under the line of doctors. It turned out that after the incident, Lance and Hayden had both been assigned to Shinji's case for a few weeks before Hayden left to Britain and Lance went back to school.

 

The irony, eh? How do you tell someone that you own the death place of their loved one?

 

The whole room was dark and even though the sun shone, his life no longer did. A soft know came on the door.

"Dr.N they expect you int he 4th floor sir" came the soft voice of his secretary.

 

Clearing his throat he looks at her. Her eyes wide and black her straight hair falling perfectly by the sides.

"I'm coming" he says but he did not really say it. Because he was no longer there.

 

As the day continued a robot was made of himself, every patient looked glad to see him, and the personal welcomed their soon to be boss warmly. But none of them could tell, how could they, how dead he was.

 

'Aren't you all doctors' he screamed internally but nothing in the exterior came out. Before realizing it he came back to the office, the sun now settling and the winter snow falling nicely on the surface of the world. His eyes watched, but they didn't really see and soon he had fallen asleep in a near by couch.

 

He awoke at 1 am by the piercing ring of his phone, who demanded battery. Quickly he charged it and washed his face in the sink by the office bathroom. His eyes lifeless, his features white.

"I can still make the night shift" he told himself as he placed his lab coat back on and headed down to ground floor. His phone remained charging in the office.

 

Morning, without realizing, came. He had been far to busy to pay any attention to himself, his mind always trailing back to Shinji and debating with his doctor thoughts.

 

'You can kill someone if you keep eating shit' he told himself every time he tried to find a solution to what had occurred in the office. His eyes brows frowned in a soft painful look but it quickly disappeared.

 

"Doctor" said a nurse "Perhaps some coffee would do?" she asks nicely as her eyes reflect worry.

"Also shaving might...help and due forgive my rudeness"

 

"Don't worry about it" he answers with a faked smile "I do look like crap"

[~*~FaLlEn*SnOw~*~]

As planned, that evening Shinji and Chidori went out to have dinner together. Despite how crappy he was feeling, Shinji was surprised that he actually enjoyed himself, talking and getting to know the other, who turned out to be very nice. She kept asking a lot about his brother, and seemed to actually enjoy hearing his stories about the two of them, in fact, she looked like if she could, she would sit all night just to hear them.

 

But sadly, that wasn't an option, and Shinji had to return home. As they drive back, they chatted some more, not about anything in particular, just about everything in general. When they turn the corner to the street that his house was on, and she parks in front of the house, she reaches out, stopping him by taking a light hold of his arm. "Um, Shinji-kun?" He looks back at her, confusion in his eyes. "Yes? What is is Chidori-San?" He replies, wondering what she was up to. She looked kind of nervous.

 

"Um...well, I have two tickets to a movie tomorrow night, and well...was wondering if you'd like to go with me to see them. And then after we can go eat dinner again. I was going to use it with my friend, but she baled on me, so now I'm left with a ticket I can't return." She looks at him, her eyes wide, and she makes a pleading look at him. "Please say you'll go with me!" She begs him, and Shinji sighs. It would do him good to distract his mind for a bit...no...more than a bit. Forever. He nods. "I'll go with."

 

The look on Chidori's face was that of joy. "Oh! Thank you Shinji-kun!" She leans forward and kisses his cheek lightly. He blinks in surprise, and blushes, getting out of the car. "I'll come for you at four tomorrow, okay? I only have one class, so it should be fine! See you tomorrow!" He nods, and waves as she drives off, and he goes into the house, goes to his room, and changes, falling asleep almost immediately.

 

~*~*~*~*~*~

 

By the next morning, Shinji was already awake, and was taking a shower, having forgotten to take one the other day. He was surprised that Chidori hadn't mentioned him. But maybe she was just too nice to do so. As he washes his hair, using a new shampoo he'd gotten, which was coconut scented, his mind wanders to Lance. He was the whole reason for him even getting the different scent... He sighs, and rinses the suds from his hair, and gets out, dries off, and then puts his clothes on. For some reason he wasn't hungry.

 

Sighing, without thinking, in the kitchen, he makes the usual cup of coffee for Lance. After a moment, he stares at the cup in his hand, before screaming loudly at the top of his lungs, and hurls it at the wall, the glass shattering against it, and coffee spilling everywhere, some getting on his hand and burning him, but he doesn't feel it. "DAMN IT!" He screams again, before exiting the room, and pulling on his coat, heading outside for a walk, ignoring the bitter cold that hit his face.

 

He needed to escape. Needed to leave. And without another thought, he walks down the sidewalk, heading towards the college. He knew he didn't have class today, but that's not why he was going. He wanted to talk to Chidori, to confide in her. It took about thirty minutes for him to reach the college, and then he just waits around, knowing she had class around lunch time. And sure enough, it hits noon, and she could be seen walking down the hall way.

 

She spots him, and a smile forms. "Hey hi Shinji-kun!" She calls, hurrying over to him, her ponytail swinging lightly behind her head. "What are you doing here? You don't have class right?" He shakes his head. "Just wanted to talk?" *Nod* "Okay then. She takes his hand, and leads him to a couple of seats, and before he knew it, he was talking to her freely, like the other night, just about anything to keep his mind occupied from that one thing that always seemed to mend his heart and at the same time break it.

 

Lance.

 

"So...what's going on between you and Lance-san?" She suddenly asks, but Shinji did not hear. He was spacing out. "Shinji-kun?" She leans over, and gets into his face. "Shinji...kun?" Tilting her head, she pokes his forehead, but still no reaction.

[alexia__]

Lance had asked his secretary for an extension of shift and according to all papers today's shift was 72 hours. But now he found himself heading to the college application in hand for a temporary leave. It was needed, now that Shinji had left him, or so Lance assumed, he needed to refocus on studies.

He tried to imagine the state his house must be in, empty now without the small boy moving around. He parks and slowly exits the car, heading to the office.

His scrubs and coat were still the same since he had not bothered to remove them. The office people question his leave greatly but he quickly dismissed it by explaining the hospitals's "situation". Then they understood.

 

Chuckling slightly he headed back the other direction he had come from, the long hallway almost empty and monochrome. The sun slightly hits his right eye and quickly he turns his head, catching hold of Shinji's day dream face. He stops.

Frozen.

Taking note in.

 

There was a girl next to him shaking his arm, in a far...too friendly state, hey face to close to his. She reached for Shinji's palm and kisses it. Shinji does nothing. Her lips continue to move and Lance could tell she was talking to him. And the her lip touch his cheek....and Lance died internally.

 

Lance swallows and gives a bitten smile.

"So you did leave me" without realizing it his legs had begun to walk, and he only noticed when Shinji's face had disappeared from view.

Angrily he slams the door of his car, and drives away. Far too fast for the speed limit. Stopping as a gas station he purchases a large pack of cigarettes and continued his drive.

The toxin of carbon monoxide and tobacco filled his lungs and he slightly coughed.

 

"Oh the sweet sweet irony" he tells himself as he reaches to light the second cigarette; the first one gone.

 

(A few days later)

--------------------------------------

 

For all Lance knew three days had passed and he had not left work. Cigarette boxes feel all over in his office and his beard had grown far too quickly. Looking into the mirror he noticed how much he resembled his father which was why he never let his facial hair grow.

The school had called the previous afternoon recalling him to head in again for some extra signings and then he was free.

 

"Dr.N floor 9" says his secretary who had been giving him the hot eyes for the passed few days. He chuckled now remembering how he had been at age 16.

'You're lucky I'm broken hearten if not you would have been fucked, literally" Lance jokes to himself.

 

"What do you think Ms. secretary" he calls to her sarcastically "Should I re-open my ear piercings would I look like a hot delinquent?!" he asks his voice rising as he reaches for another pack and pulls a white cigarette in his mouth. Inhaling the addicting fumes.

-------------------------------------

 

The day was cloudy and although it was lunch time it appeared later than usual. He found himself once again in the school heading to the office, he stops to finish his cigarette when a voice calls him.

"Lance?"

 

"Huh...Oh hey Yuuki" he calls his voice raspy and low

"Lance where have you been, I been calling you. You went on temporary leave!!?" she asks agitate

"Notch it down girl, If gave a fuck I'll be here, that's why I'm leaving" he answered her coldly

"But Lance..y- who are you?" but before she could get an answer Lance had walked away.

---------------------------------

 

"Yuuki" called the Chemistry "Where the hell is Lance?"

 

The whole chemistry class had turned to look at her now. The question had been floating around the entire medical department for some time Where was Lance? he had missed a full week when usually he was always there.

 

"Oh you mean ass delinquent of Tokyo!?" she answers sarcastically, and slightly rising from her chair "If anyone cared to know! He looks like a 30 year old rapist, he sticks of cigarette and looks like he hasn't shaved in years! he's disgusting and repulsive you know what he told me professor?" she says now her breath coming in large gasps.

 

"That if he gave a shit about school he would be here!" let that answer your question. The whole class now stood quiet and deserted almost as if a death had occurred, the teacher speechless stood in front of the class. And Yuuki's eyes landed on Shinji's then quickly looks away.

-------------------------------------

 

 

He ran into the girl from before as he exited the office. She stares at him for sometime before approaching him.

'Seriously' he tells himself.

 

"Hello" she says. lance eyes him.

"You're Shinji's friend right?"

 

His eyes fall to the floor and a sadistic smile spreads over his lips "Yeah...no I'm no one's friend especially yours"

"How rude!" she answers "I don't know what such a nice guys sees in you, you'll make a terrible talk partner"

 

"Obviously I see in him the same shit you see, what did you have to spread yourself up to get his attention" *laughs dryly* "What a joke please"

 

*All occurs in one day*

 

 

Lance's look

 

 

[~*~FaLlEn*SnOw~*~]

By the next day at at school, it had been almost over five days since Shinji had last seen Lance. And he was worried. He didn't want to admit it, but he truly was in deep worry about what had gone on with the older male, noticing that he hadn't come to school at all. The overwhelming worry he felt himself was effecting him deeply, he slept less, next to not at all, and he hadn't eaten anything since the dinner from three and a half days ago. His skin was pale, and he looked like he was not only suffering from fatigue, but a slight fever as well.

 

In class, the girl named Yuuki suddenly speaks up. At first Shinji ignores what was being said, but then, he turns to look at her, his eyes narrowed, a frown on his lips. He stares right back at her, his gaze almost freezing, but at the same time burning like fire. "How dare you say that about him?! DON'T EVER TALK ABOUT HIM LIKE THAT YOU FUCKING BITCH!" He snaps, making the other students gasp. They'd never even heard Shinji talk that much, let alone something like this.

 

He doesn't wait to see what happened, and picks up his things and rushes from the classroom, ignoring the teacher as he protested Shinji leaving, trying to get him to come back. But he does not, instead, he continues on, oblivious to anything that was around him. That was, until he saw Chidori speaking to someone. Despite the facial hair and the raggedy appearance...he knew who that was.

 

For a moment he just watches, hearing the words exchanged between them. A dry laugh could be heard from Chidori. "You actually think I'm going to answer that question. You're rude. At least Shinji knows how to be sweet, just like his brother, Rai. Now he was someone that knew how to treat other people! Unlike yourself! You can't even take care of you, let alone poor Shinji." She flips her hair, oblivious that Shinji was watching this whole thing.

 

"Now, between you and me...I'm only into that kid because he looks like his older brother. Acts like him, sounds like him. Too bad he's not Rai. But we can't have it all, can we? And you can't have anything it seems. You always wreck it." At this, Shinji shows himself. "So...that's it huh?" Chidori gasps. "You only like me because I look like Rai?" She tries to cover her falter with a smile. "N-No! Of course not!"

 

Shinji smiles grimly. "Yes...that's it. I should have known. I guess I was just too blind to see that. And you know what Chidori?" He looks over at Lance for a moment. "At least Lance doesn't use people. Unlike you. I don't ever want to see you again." He turns away, and walks off, not glancing back once. The look on Chidori's face was incredulous. She shoots Lance a nasty glare, before leaving as well.

 

Not going anywhere in particular, he ends up walking aimlessly in the corridors. He felt like he'd just been stabbed several times in the heart. Or that it had become glass, and was now shattering into a million tiny pieces. Tears flow from his eyes, his eyes stinging terrible from the lack of sleep. "Damn it...I don't know what to do anymore..."

 

He reaches the lab, which was now empty, as classes had finished not too shortly after he'd left. He goes inside, not realizing that there had been a chemical problem, and it reaches his nostrils, making him stop, and his head felt light, like it was filled with hot air, as he falls to the floor, close to passed out, gasping for breath. "L...Lance..." His eyes roll to the back of his head, and he was out like a light.

 

Yuuki had come up to Lance moments after Shinji had left, anger in her eyes. But obviously she'd been affected by the screaming that Shinji had done. "I was told to tell you that the lab is off limits for a while. Some gas spilled and it's trying to be contained right now. By the way, have you seen Shinji? Damn brat forgot his homework." She avoided looking at Lance the whole time.