16+ Naruto [Killing my heart softly] - Uchiha

[KazegawaRen]

This is something I wrote after watching this video:

 

This is something that I myself find very disturbing and sad, but it was just the feeling I got from the video. This isn't, in any ways, related to that video or any real events in Naruto, just something that rushed past my writer's-block after watching the video above.

 

I hope to get feedback about this, no matter the nature of it. Negative or positive, please let it come.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Killing my heart softly

 

 

 

The heaven cried together with him. Rain poured down to ground as a large fall, watering the whole ground. Just like his tears ran down on his cheeks as he ran towards the cellar of the hospital, leaving only small wet drops behind.

His chest was in so much pain that it prevented him from breathing. He couldn't get even one inhale to his lungs. It hurt to even think about receiving oxygen. It hurt so much that he couldn't almost even move. Still he was here, running towards the emergency room.

"You can't get past h--" The words of an ANBU-guardian were cut off when he was pushed out of the way together with the other guardians with a fire wall.

The raven haired boy rushed through the heavy white doors into a darkroom with the only light in the middle of the room, around the surgery area.

The boy stared at what was in front of him with empty doll-like eyes,tears running down on his cheeks like rivers. The whole room gasped at his entrance, and in less than a second, 13 ANBU-squad members jumped at him, ready to finish him off in an instance.

The raven haired boy didn't even flinch at this. The pain in his chest just grew as he continued to watch the dimly lighted center of the emergency room. It was like someone was cutting open his upper body and sticking a knife through his chest. It was killing him, that pain.

"Halt!" A powerful woman-voice raised in the otherwise silent room, and 13 shinobi stopped only seconds away from thrusting their kunai's in to the raven haired boy's chest.

"Let him through." Tsunade ordered, and now the ANBU-squad didn't even move as the young man walked past them.

 

 

15 meters away... His feet were wobbly, and the pain in his chest was tightening. His vision was so masked with tears that he could barely see what was in front of him anymore. He let out quiet exhaling-noices, and his shoulders were shaking in a lonely manner.

 

 

10 meters away... He couldn't see anymore. Only the dim light was showing him the way, since it shined through the darkness and tears, faintly.His steps became slower and slower and his body weaker and weaker. He couldn't almost even raise his feet anymore. The pain in his chest almost killed him.

 

 

5 meters away... His body was starting to feel numb. He couldn't almost feel his feet anymore. Were they even moving? Was he getting closer or not? It was hard to tell without an ability to see.

 

 

2 meters away... Someone called his name, and the vision came from black to blurry. He could see again, but just a bit. It took him seconds to get adjusted to the light and find the darker objects in front of him again.

 

 

Half a meter away... He stopped walking. He could now tell that in front of him there was the surgeon's table, and there was a person lying on it. The hard part was to now wipe off his tears when he could hardly even move his body anymore. Somehow he managed.

Blood,open holes and wounds everywhere, bandages, stitches, black spots.The pain in the chest started to slowly become unbearable. It was literally making him fall on his knees. The unconscious body here was recognizable, no matter how bruised and bloody it was. He recognized that face, those lips, that neck-line, those collarbones. Every single part of that body was known by him better than his own name.

The raven haired tried to reach his hand forward, to touch him. To touch that familiar face. To touch the body of his most precious person.But he couldn't. His body wouldn't move anymore. He had totally lost his will power after that sight. There, in the place of his most precious person's arm, was only emptiness and bloody bandages above non-existing flesh. It turned his stomach upside down and he vomited to the floor.

"We had to cut his arm off because of the infection... It would have proceeded to his heart otherwise. I'm sorry..." Someone spoke, but he didn't listen. He even couldn't listen. Water blurred his vision once again and he raised his face to the ceiling. He opened his mouth, and for minutes no voice came out from his lips. Salted water drops flowed into his mouth from his eyes, but he still didn't give a sound. Not even when someone called his name. He couldn't calm down and listen.He was about to freak out. It was only a matter of time when the realization would hit him. He just had to accept the fact that---

"Itachiii------!"The cry of a raven haired boy could be heard trough out all the way from the cellar of the hospital to the heaven. It was a ear-ravishing scream full of emotion. Pain, horror, sadness and desperate call for help. He got his answer from the sky again. A thunderbolt hit the ground near to them and blacked out the whole village. Emergency room as well. It was black only for seconds though. Soon the operating surgeons and medical ninja activated the refrigerator and started to operate under the new light with double speed.

He lost the count of seconds and hours as he sat there, in the middle of the room next to the table. He didn't realize that he was on the way nor did he realize that he was sitting on his own vomit. Even if he had realized that, he wouldn't have been able to move though. Everything else in him had gave up activity except for his chest which was eating his heart alive. He wanted the nightmare to end soon and to see his precious person healthy and in full spirits once again. He didn't want to be here and see this. Anything else but not this.

He felt like loosing it, his head was starting to feel dizzy and his eyes heavy as if they were pulled down by two mountain-fulls of rock. He fought against losing his consciousness with all his will, but it seemed like he had lost his mental strength as well. He was just an empty shell without a thing inside. Even the tears wouldn't come out anymore. The pain in his chest had made him numb to anything else. He couldn't even think straight. He just sat there and stared at the bloody floor with emotionless eyes for hours. Maybe for days. No-one had counted time since his arrival.

Just when he was about to lose himself to the pits of darkness, a hand fell on his head. A wet, sweaty and bloody hand full of bruises and pain.

"Sa...su...ke"A faint voice called. A sound so quiet that the raven haired boy couldn't even be sure if he had heard a real thing, or if he had just fallen asleep.

The hand moved on his head, rustling his hair and the voice rose once again, this time even more quieter. It called out his name again, but now it came out only as pained pants. The medics started to run all around the patient, yelling in shock.

"He should be unconscious for at least the next 4 months, how did he just speak?"

"This isn't possible, he talked even if the survival percent is nonexistent!"

"This is a miracle!"

"Wait! Look at the sensors! His life force is getting weaker and weaker!"

"His heart is going to explode just like his lungs if he continues to speak anymore!"

"I can't feel him breath anymore."

Those yells went to deaf ears. He didn't pay attention to them. He rose from the floor, shakily holding the edge of the table in a tight grip. His eyes hit the lying body of his big brother, his most precious person. The bloody, sweaty hand now came in touch with his hand which held the edge firmly, and Sasuke's eyes wet again.

"I'm sorry... I'm so... sorry... I did... didn't... mean to.... I didn't mean... so sorry...." Sasuke's body started to shake violently as his pained sobs grew faster and louder. The salted drops fell on the bruised hand of his brother, and that's when he saw his brother slowly open eyes. Those eyes were something which Sasuke knew he would never forget. Those eyes were the ones of someone who was standing in hell's fire, and had already stood there for hundreds of years. I could describe them as full of pain, horror and fear, but they were far worse from that. There were no words to describe those eyes which shot at Sasuke's face after a few seconds of searching.

As soon as they found their target, the corners rose slightly.The older raven haired was in too much pain and probably couldn't feel the half of his face, so the mouth didn't curve, but it was definitely a smile saying: "Don't worry, everything is fine otouto."

"Do... gize...Do.. not... apo... logize..." The rest of the words always turned into pained gasps but Sasuke got the hold of their meaning. It didn't make him feel better at all. It felt like if someone hit a fist through his chest, took his heart into a firm grip and squeezed it with all force. He was the worst. He didn't deserve such kind words.

"I--- I love you... I.. I love you so much..." Sasuke whispered, and his voice broke at last. He pressed his forehead against their connected hands and let out pained cries, his heart full of pain. The hand in his squeezed just a little bit, and he knew that his message had went through. He loved Itachi. Not as a brother but as just himself. As another person loved other person, without any restrictions. A pure love.

He kissed on the back of Itachi's bruised hand and could feel the weakened muscles tense at the touch of his lips. Carefully and slowly he drew his face back from the hand and turned his face to meet Itachi's eyes. Again,the eye-corners had went up by a few millimeters and if he wasn't seeing his own things, Sasuke saw that the mouth was also curved very very little. It was as if it was a ghost of a curve.

The warm gaze in those pained and otherwise empty eyes was everything to the raven haired boy. He couldn't have wished for more than the attention of those two shimmering orbits. It would have been more than enough for him for the rest of his life. He had never wanted anything else than this. And he had endangered it. He had put all of this at risk. The future was now hanging on the edge of a knife, and you couldn't tell when it would fall or be cut in half. It was scaring the hell out of him, more than anything. His chest pained again.

The older male saw the change of the younger one's expression. Darker,sad eyes and avoiding manners. The hand was squeezed again, this time it could hardly even be felt. The older brother felt that he was already on the edge and should have just closed his eyes to survive.One more movement, even raising a finger could have killed him. He knew it yet he didn't want to do what he should have done. Instead he collected all of his remaining energy and living force and put it into his very last actions.

A full-edged smile took it's place on his sweaty face and he raised his hand up. He flicked two of his fingers at his younger brothers forehead, just like old times. Gently like a peck of kiss."I.......too--"Those were the only words which came past his lips anymore, the other two were left missing, said but with no voice. Then he coughed two times, and on the last cough he spitted a large amount of blood upwards, which landed on his face soon after. He had coughed out the remains of his life. The last drops of blood that had kept his heart beating, even if it was only faintly. There was no heart beat anymore. One soul's energy had left the room, disappeared into the darkness. It was gone now, for an eternity.