The Prince and His Knight [Kaito and Koe-chan]

[BlaqueCatt]

Lysander's eyes widened when Aridon started laughing, and he turned to stare at the king, his expression stunned, for a few moments. Then, he grinned and let out a quiet chuckle. "Don't make fun of me!" he complained, a mock pout appearing on his pale face as he let out a low whine of despair. "I didn't know the king could be so cruel." He returned the shorter man's smile with a playful grin, lightly smacking the red-head's shoulder. He froze when he realized what he had done, and he hesitated, searching the king's eyes for any sign of disapproval. It wasn't his place to touch the king so casually, was it? When all he saw was his own eagerness reflected, he relaxed and allowed himself to relish the sensation of sharing companionable words with the man he considered to be his best friend.

 

"I don't think I'll return for her," he admitted after they had calmed down, and at that moment, it was as if the war had never happened and they had continued to grow up together. "By now she's likely found another man. And I would never be enough for her. I couldn't give her what she needed or wanted. I also assume she'd want to live in her kingdom, and I will never be able to leave this place again. She's better off without me." He would never be able to leave Aridon's side again. He would travel the world with the king, but he would never leave him. "Besides, I'm not the marrying type. I love kids, but I don't think I'd be a good husband." He blushed again. "You would be the best husband out of the two of us. You know how to handle women, and how to get things done. I'd just spend all of my time playing with the kids, if I had any. They'd starve eventually." If Lysander did have a family, he would work as hard as he could to provide for them, but he didn't think he would be able to put up with or understand the needs of a woman.

[海翔]

Aridan laughed again and nudged the others shoulder. "You think of me too highly Lysander! I don't know how to Handle women at all." He said waving his hand back and forth. "I don't handle them, I tolerate them. I've lost all hope in finding a bride anyway." The king mumbled this almost as he turned to face the church again. It's true, anyone that Derin has tried to set him up with is either a power hungry pig, clinging to him like a lost puppy, or something else. The other thing was, Aridan wasn't at all interested in them, much less Marriage.

 

Yeah he was good with kids and would be an OK husband, but he couldn't see himself having a family. Having a family meant having something to lose, and having something to lose was a weakness. Weakness was something he could not have with a kingdom to rule. He had a while longer till he had to have one anyway, no reason to get ahead of himself and risk having too much to lose. "Hell i'd rather marry you, than marry the bimbos Derin tries to set me up with!" He said before chuckling abit more.

 

The young king turned around and began walking again, this time heading farther out towards the woods. "Lets go exploring shall we~?" The red head said pointing with his good arm.

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[BlaqueCatt]

"Well, I'm sure you know more than me," Lysander replied, his smile having become much softer as the initial excitement ebbed away. "You've spent most of your life socializing, and I know you've met your fair share of women. Even if you don't like the ones you've spoken with, you know more about them than a man who's been camping only with other men for eleven years." For once, when the knight referred to his experiences as a soldier, he did not appear disheartened. He was too busy enjoying his time with Aridon to think about how unfair life had been to him. He was willing to put his past behind him if it meant he could stay with the king. That is, if he could manage to put it all behind him. There was no telling whether or not he could get past the trauma he had suffered at the hands of his own kingdom, the kingdom he returned to after all he had been through.

 

"And don't say that." The taller man gently admonished the king. "You'll find a woman you love, and you'll have dozens of tiny children running around and begging for your attention." Now the whitette smirked, knowing how flustered Arion would become at the thought of having such a large amount of children to look after. However, before he had a chance to rejoice in his little victory, the red-head continued with his speech, and what he said caused Lysander's gray eyes to widen and a light pink flush to appear on his pale cheeks. He silently cleared his throat and looked away, unsure of why the king's words had caused such a reaction. Aridon was just joking, so why had his words stirred up a fluttering in the knight's heart? He didn't understand.

 

Trying to appear to have taken the comment good-naturedly, Lysander responded casually, "I doubt you'd want to marry me, Your Highness. I caused my parents a lot of trouble as a child, and I'm sure I'd cause you just as much." It was true that he had been a difficult child, but not for normal reasons. He had refused to eat meat because an animal had died. He had cried over the smallest things, and he had always managed to get himself hurt one way or another, whether by clumsiness or bullying. It was only after meeting Aridon that things had gotten better for them, but then they were torn apart at an early age, and all of Lysander's progress had ground to a halt.

 

Don't think like that, he scolded himself as he followed the king. It will only cause more problems.

[海翔]

"Yes, but i'm not your parents. When have you ever given me any real trouble?" the king asked while chuckling. Afterwards He continued walking towards the Forrest area, the to had all day to do things after all, why not do a little exploring. Aridan had to be more careful than usual however due to his arms, yet he managed to tread without much damage. His eyes looked at the trees as they walked, they seemed to bend towards him while at the same time fighting for light. It was nice and peaceful, although there were still sounds of the animals that made their home there.

 

"Hey Lysander! Remember when we would sneak out from the castle and go on made up expeditions in the woods?" Aridan smiled and then remembered that he was always trying to do more than he could, which led to him getting in a bunch of painful situations in which Lysander had to get him out of. "Hah, now that i think about it. Even then you were trying to protect me huh? " He realized and came to stop to look back at him. "I was a pretty weak kid wasn't i?" Aridan admitted, laughing as he pulled the hood from his head. He wasn't worried about people seeing them since they were so far in. He didn't know what would've happened to them in these woods if it wasn't for Lysander.

 

Soon after, aridan continued walking until he came upon a clearing that was just a grassy area surrounded by trees with tuffs of clover patches. Picking a random spot he sat down, only to lay down soon after and let the breeze blow across his face, blowing his bangs with it. "Always fun when i find these places."

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[BlaqueCatt]

"Being a troublesome son is different from being a troublesome friend," Lysander commented, brushing the bangs from his eyes as the pair strayed away from the path and moved into the forested area. A cool breeze had appeared, and the trees surrounding them swayed gently, showering them with sporadic downfalls of green leaves. The scenery had a calming effect on the knight, and he had to remain focused in order to keep himself from reaching out to touch the other man. Not only did he want to support the other due to the red-head's injury, but he also yearned for more intimate contact, contact which he had not had access to since he was a child. He doubted, however, that he would ever be able to have such contact with Aridon again; after all, they were not seen as equals in the eyes of the court, and while it could have been tolerated while they were children, it definitely wouldn't be permitted while they are adults.

 

But out here, we have no rank. Lysander mentally shook his head. No. It is not my place. Not anymore. The two of them walked without speaking for several minutes, simply enjoying the peaceful atmosphere. Eventually, the silence was broken and the king turned to his companion. "Hey Lysander! Remember when we would sneak out from the castle and go on made up expeditions in the woods?" The taller man's smile widened, and his dark gray eyes filled with reminiscent fondness.

 

"Of course I remember," he replied, unable to refrain from placing his hand on the king's back to steady him as they climbed over a patch of rocks. "Your mother was always worried sick and she would scold us when we returned." There was a short pause, and then Aridon spoke again. Lysander's smile faded and he glanced to the side, giving the king a disbelieving look. "Your Highness--Aridon. You were not weak then, and you are not now. I will never forget all of the times you saved me from the village kids who pushed me around. I idolized you then, and I have the utmost respect for you now. Don't ever think lowly of yourself. I swore to protect you not because you are weak, but because I want to see your strength in action." The paler man's gentle smile returned after he had finished, and he wordlessly sat beside the king once they stopped to rest.

[海翔]

Aridan was slightly taken aback by the others response, even giving the other a slight wide eyed look when he sat down next to him. Aridan knew that Lysander had looked up to him a tiny bit, but he didn't think that it was actually a lot more than that. The red-head shifted his position so that he was propped up against him and leaned his head back onto Lysanders shoulder. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you. I guess i'm not the most confident person around." He said letting out a small sigh. He knew better than to put himself down now a days, even more so now that Lysander had returned. His friend had just returned yesterday and the young king was already upsetting him.

 

As he watched the leaves whistle in the wind, he began thinking about all the things he wanted to talk about with Lysander. Before he could pull a good one, something else came flying from his mouth which wasn't what he wanted at all. "Hey Lysander, you're going to stay with me forever right?" He asked and looked up and over to the mans face. "I hope so, that means you'll get to celebrate my birthday with me from this year on." He paused for a moment before continuing. "You know, after you were drafted and everything, during my birthdays i would be asked what i want." He cleared his throat and rather softly began to speak like a younger child.

 

"I don't want anything other than a party and Lysander!" The young adult chuckled at his imitation. "Of course, saying such things had made my mother sad, so i always made it up to her because i didn't want her to feel bad." Aidan nodded his head. "Now, i'm not telling you this to make you upset as well. I don't want that at all...it was just something that came to mind." After a minute or two he spoke yet again with a slight shimmer in his eyes. "Lysander! Tell me a tale from war, was there anytime you were really proud of what you did?" he said with as much enthusiasm as he could muster. Sometimes however, Aridan wondered if Lysander was upset with his father for drafting him, and Aridan for not stopping it. Not that e would ever ask about it and risk tearing something up.

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[BlaqueCatt]

Lysander stiffened slightly when Aridon leaned against him, his gray eyes widening dramatically. He stared down at the king with shock painting his features, unsure of what to make of the situation. The king permitted this form of contact? With him, a mere knight? No. With a friend. Instantly the whitette relaxed, and the small smile that was reserved only for the red-head reappeared, gently stretching his pale lips upwards. He hesitantly wrapped his arm around Aridon's mid-torso to hold him steady, shifting so that the shorter man's head was resting comfortably on his shoulder. "You didn't upset me," he replied softly, closing his eyes and inhaling the fresh scent of the wind that ruffled his hair and loose clothes. "I just worry about you. That's all." Despite his previous decision to keep his distance, Lysander found himself pulling Aridon closer to him, each one supporting the other as they sat staring up at the sky, neither one having any idea that male friends were never as close as they were at that moment.

 

"Of course I'll stay with you forever," the knight responded immediately, not even pausing to wonder where the question had come from. He paid no mind to the promise he was making, as it felt right to him and he doubted that he was even capable of lying to his closet friend. "Throughout the entire war, all I cared about was keeping you safe. I thought of my family, but you were always the first to come to mind. I could have started over in that other kingdom. I could have settled down and had children. But I came back because my place is by your side." His voice held nothing but honesty, and when the king imitated his younger self, Lysander felt a flash of warmth surge inside of his chest.

 

He cared for me too...and I hope he still does. "I will make sure that I am with you for all of your birthdays," he promised quietly, his hold on the other man tightening ever-so-slightly. However, he found himself unable to speak when Aridon asked for a story of the war. His gray eyes darkened, and his lips pursed into a thin line. He partially closed himself off by turning his head away, but he still stayed close to the red-head. "...there is nothing to be proud of in war," he murmured, his words tight with pain. "Even those you manage to save are eventually killed by another or forced into slavery."

[海翔]

Aridan had tried to get as close to the other as possible for a sense of comfort an reassurance that the other wasn;'t going anywhere. His face flushed when Lysander promised to stay by his side forever, it made him really happy that he wouldn't have to part from him again. Aridan was comfortable near his best friend and could only imagine what it would have been like the rest of his days if he hadn't come back. I would probably still be mourning and end up alone the rest of my days... The red head thought. Although a minute later his expression fell hearing the other speak.

 

"...there is nothing to be proud of in war, even those you manage to save are eventually killed by another or forced into slavery." Aridan flinched slightly and went to look at Lysander only to see his head turned away from him. This pained Aridan more so than the pain that was laced in the knights words, he had only messed up again when he told himself that his wouldn't. He looked down and slowly his eyes glossed over as if he was going to cry, and in an effort to stop himself from doing so his arm shook subtly. He was such a naive person, of course that would be a bad thing to ask Lysander who wouldn't even be able to handle the death of an animal, much less so a person. Imagine him having to kill one.

 

"Haha...yeah, i guess you're right...there really isn't anything to be proud of in war..." he said with as much of an even voice as he could muster. He suddenly felt as if all he would ever do was say the wrong things. Ah...I really should just stop talking. I don't know this Lysander at all... he thought as his eyesight blurred and a single, warm tear began to fall from his left eye. which was soon joined by one from his right and suddenly he was crying a silent stream of tears down his face because he felt as if he wouldn't be able to remain the others best friend. The young king really didn't want it to turn into such a professional relationship...it would hurt.

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[BlaqueCatt]

For a moment, Lysander was once again lost within his memories. The coppery stench of blood mixed with sweat and grime filled his nostrils, and his skin crawled as he vividly remembered the sight of his own red-stained hands. He imagined the decaying bodies spread out haphazardly across the battlefield; he heard the shrieks of the dying and the heavy groans of the wounded. Inside of his mind, the young, thirteen-year-old Lysander dropped to his knees in front of the body of a man only a few years older than him. The teenager desperately wanted to help the injured soldier, but his hands were shaking so badly that he fumbled with his satchel, and his eyes were so blurred with tears that he couldn't see, and his thoughts were swirling so violently that he couldn't focus. Their eyes met, and Lysander nearly choked on the bile rising in his throat when he saw the others' agonized eyes turn glassy as his life slipped away. The whitette, frozen in shock, barely even noticed the tears that were cascading down his cheeks and dripping onto his arm...

 

The knight blinked back into reality when he became aware of the fact that the wetness on his arm was not imagined. He quickly turned to Aridon, and his gray eyes widened when he saw the condition that the king was in. The gruesome memories were pushed away to make room for the taller man's concern. "Aridon," he said gently, trying not to sound panicked, "why are you crying? Did something I say upset you?" Of course it did, you idiot! He's been sheltered all his life. You probably scared him. Instead of bitterness towards the king's protected lifestyle, Lysander only felt the need to comfort the red-head. "Aridon, please, stop crying. I apologize for upsetting you. You needn't trouble yourself over my past. All that I care about is the fact that I'm with you now." That was partially a lie; Lysander was still heavily burdened by his experiences. But the real Lysander was still beneath the scarred soldier, and if there was to be any way of recovering him, it would be to stay together; Lysander needed to speak and be heard, and to be reassured that he wouldn't have to kill again. That he wouldn't have to be alone.

[海翔]

Aridan slightly gritted his teeth at the others words, he didn't like how the moment he got upset, Lysander would think it was his fault. The young king wiped his eyes and continued to keep his gaze forward instead of paying the other much attention. "While i appreciate your concern for me Lysander, have you even tried today, to think that it's not always your fault i'm upset?" He questioned in a calm and unevenly gentle tone. Even in the past, every so often, Aridan would mess up something and get upset about it; and Lysander would blame himself and apologize to Aridan unnecessarily. "You needn't be so worried about whether or not you have upset me, because you have not. It is I who upset myself, and fear I've upset you." Aridan confided out loud with a sigh.

 

"All I've done today and the day before, is said a bunch of things that would either upset you like just now, or make you uncomfortable. " He said gesturing with his hand. "All I have wanted to do is get to know you again, find out what things have changed, what hasn't. Lysander it's been 10 years, I may have known you so well before but I would like to update my knowledge. People change over 10 years, you especially, having taken part in that horrid war." The king said before shifting his sitting position so that he was facing Lysander. "The only thing I worry about is whether or not you'll ever let me get to know the you that has grown over the years. It's only been a day sure, i'm willing to take weeks, maybe months..." The king made a wide gesture with his arm.

 

"Years even! You're probably thinking that I fear you, or something along those lines. The only thing that I fear is not being able to be with you like I want to." The young king finished talking and went to cover his own mouth. "Oh no, ah...My Apologies Lysander. None of that came out like it was supposed to, especially that last part." He said while hiding his face with an embarassed sigh.

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[BlaqueCatt]

Lysander, as patient as always, listened carefully to what the king was saying. He managed to remain silent even when Aridon's words bothered him deeply, though his disapproval was clear in the way his lips pressed tightly together as he struggled to keep from frowning. If it was not me, then what could have caused such a reaction? He opened his mouth to speak - You did not upset me. Tell me what happened to make you feel this way. - but he was interrupted before he could even utter a sound. As he watched the red-head become more animated as he continued with his rant, the knight felt several different emotions swirl within his stomach. There was guilt, first of all, as he had been unable to control his reactions and had ended up worrying the person he cared for the most; there was surprise upon learning how much Aridon wanted to understand him, and that surprise was mixed with gratefulness and something akin to love; and then there was hesitance. He wanted to confide in his friend, but he was afraid of what it would do to both of them.

 

"Aridon," he said gently, "look at me." He waited until the other man was facing him, and then he leaned forward and wrapped his arms around him, enveloping him in a tight hug. "I want to share everything with you," he murmured, closing his eyes and burying his face into the king's shoulder, all inhibitions forgotten in the swirl of emotions. "But...I'm afraid. Afraid of myself, and what might happen to you if you see what the war did to me." His voice cracked, and tears leaked from the corners of his eyes. "I...I hate who I am now. I want to be myself again...but I can't do that without you...but I don't want to hurt you..." His shoulders were trembling. "Please, forgive me," he whispered.

[海翔]

Aridan was shocked as he was pulled forwards into a hug. Listening to him talk was slowly making the young king shake and break down. He just wanted to understand the other again, he didn't know that the other was much too afraid to talk about it. That he was scared of what knowing would do to Aridan and their friendship in general, He didn't know and that's what had begun to fill him up with guilt more so than asking questions did. Aridan hugged Lysander back and instinctively began rubbing gentle circles on his friends back like his mother did to him when he was upset or scared. "I'm sorry, i didn't know that it scared you that much. Forgive me for being so nosy." He apologized.

 

Maybe what Aridan had ranted about was a bit much, it had only been a day and he was already crossing too many lines at one time. HE decided that it would probably be better if he didn't ask about these things and after awhile he gave Lysander another squeeze before parting from him and standing up. "Come on now." He said holding out his hand. "This is cliche as one can get, but you never looked good in tears." He chuckled. "in fact, you look terrible with them if i do say so myself."

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[BlaqueCatt]

Because Aridon had given him a chance to release some of the emotions that had been festering inside of him, he was able to laugh at the prince's comment without forcing it. He pulled away from the shorter man and gave him a weak smile, wiping at his eyes with his sleeve. "I cried all the time when I was young," he replied, taking the others' hand despite not needing it and pulling himself to his feet. He was starved for touch, but he withdrew for the sake of his friend. "Did I look terrible as a child as well?" Some of the tension had lightened, but they could not continue avoiding their issues forever. Lysander needed to confront his past before it destroyed him, and Aridon had to listen, lest he lose his best friend to the darkness forever. There needed to be some sort of understanding between the two, some resolution that would allow them to heal their relationship. They could not start the mending process until they had let go of the past.

 

{Sorry for the short post, I have to go to a violin lesson}