Winter's Delight(In need of older Seme.)

[Sosuke0549]

Jun stepped inside the club wearing a tight black shirt and baggy dark jeans. His hair falling in his eyes as he followed Yagiri threw the crowd of people. It was dark and there were bright colorful lights flashing everywhere. The music pounding and up so loud that you thought the entire building was shaking. His friend guided him over to the bar.

"frist drink on me- what do you want"

He shouted over the loud music. Jun grinned.

"A shot..."

"I'll get you three!"

He patted him on the back as they sat and laughed about the old days but after 25 Mintues of talking

Yagiri left him to go dance.

 

Jun stared at the crowd of people dancing and grinding on each other. It had been so long since he danced and had fun.

"Hey...My names Hiro..What's yours ?"

A younger male approached him. Probably 18 or 19. He had pitch black hair and brown eyes. Piercing on his ears and lip . He was wearing all black and had a smile on his face. Jun wasn't really into guys with piecing let alone someone so young but....

"Jun...You come here often?"

"All the time. But Ive never seen you before. "

He shrugged.

"Just trying to have a good time. Its been a very long time since I went out clubbing. "

"Do you wanna dance...I mean...unless your not like that--"

Jun laughed looking at Hiro with a smirk.

"Your cute."

The boy blushed suddenly which surprised even him. He slowly stood and took the boys hand.

"Lets see if you can keep up Hiro.."

He pressed the boys body against his and disappeared in the crowd of sweating, horny people .

[JR_TheRandomFan]

With more of his friends around Dylani was beginning to feel a bit better.Once the other traps arrived they were instantly pulled into a slur of quick conversation and waves of laughter. The blonde couldn't remember the last time he actually laughed. It felt great to let go of his worries, even if it was only for the moment. As the five traps sat around the living room for a movie Dylani could only breathe a soft sigh before laying his head back." I couldn't think that I could ever find myself so relaxed... I really do have to thank you all for this."

 

"Oh don't sweat it. Whatever to help you feel better."

 

"After what has happened with you, we felt like this would help to take your mind off of things. It's good to see that it's working."

 

"I hope you're not missing Jun too much. I'm sure that he's doing fine on his own."

 

Glancing over the group Dylani could feel his stomach slightly drop at the mention of his lover. He wasn't ready to talk about him without worrying about him. The fact that he couldn't see him then was still painful. With a shake of his head, the blonde gave them a weak smile." I'm not really," he lied." I know that he'll be fine. I shouldn't worry so much about him I have to focus on myself.

 

"No matter how much it hurts me..."

[Sosuke0549]

Jun layed on his bed as he starred up at the ceiling. The lights off. He couldn't help but to recall the amazing night he had. Dancing with Hiro. Getting almost drunk with Yagiri. Laughing all night long and getting lost in those flashing lights and loud music. He could never take Dyanli to such a place. He'd stick out far too much and would most likely feel uncorforable.

Jun's phone suddenly chimed- meaning he got a text message. He reached for his phone finding it was Hiro. He was having so much fun that he must of forgotten that he had gave the younger male his number.

The two of them grinded on each other all night long and he found himself at times wanting to undress and kiss the boy but he restrained himself. When the younger male did lean in for a kiss Jun would shake his head- pulling back a little.

 

Only later did he explain why to Hiro , who only smiled at him and told him that someone as good as him shouldn't be so down.

"I see.. Well..Not that its any of my business but... A guy like you... Of course you'd already have someone..but...if it doesn't work out ...well..."

"You'll be waiting ?"

Jun finished for him grinning a little.

"Things are very complicated with my partner and I..so were on a little break...I'm not tecnically tied to him but... It doesn't feel right... To kiss you or do stuff with you..no offense. I'm flattered . This is my time to be free and relax and just... Not deal with drama. Your cute Hiro, but too young for me and I really can't image why someone like you is in a place like this. One night stands don't really suite you."

The boy blushed looking at the ground.

 

Jun surprising made a friend that night.

 

Jun texted Hiro back before putting his phone away . he thought about calling Dyanli but ...decided not too... As he layed there he realized that the two of them had no pictures together. They had been dating for almost a year now.. And they never took a single picture together. Never went on a trip somewhere and only had sex... What ... Maybe 2 or 3 times ?

 

Jun sighed. There relationship was slowly crumbling. Jun never knew that you could be so much in love with a person. And yet... Be so miserable.

[JR_TheRandomFan]

As Dylani went to bed for the night he made sure to check his phone one last time. There really much surprise to see that Jub hadn't messaged him again. He expected this, but something within him did wish that there was something. A text good night, something that assured him that he was somewhat in his thoughts." Oh come off yourself." He scolded aloud." Jun is trying to rid of the drama you caused. He doesn't need to check on you,or you check on him... Just let him be..." With that the blonde had some trouble falling asleep. His mind was simply running wild with things that he wished they could've done together. Trips that they could've gone on, pictures that they could've taken, places that they could've gone. What kind of lover could he even call himself if all they had ever done that they could note was fight? The very thought made him feel even lower than before. Sinking deep into the covers he went to sleep with tears in his eyes, and wishing that the next day will prove to be better.

[Sosuke0549]

The next day Jun texted Dyanli in the morning.

 

Morning Dyanli. I hope your ok. I just wanted to text you and let you know that your on my mind . I woke up today and realized how odd it felt to sleep in a bed with out someone else.. It can get kind of cold. I'll be seeing you again soon.. Love you- Jun

He sighed meaning most of what he said. He figured he should text his lover... Knowing how anxious Dyanli could get.

He grabbed his helmet and headed out with Yagri to drive around town. He'd be lying if he didn't say there were times where he missed Dyanli...he was his lover after all...and yet there were times where her forget all about him...

[JR_TheRandomFan]

When Dylani woke up the next morning he found himself surprised to see that Jun had texted him. As he read over the text over and over he only got this feeling of sadness instead of excitement or joy whenever he did get a text from them." He still probably forgets me." he told himself." I can't really be mad at him. I bet that he's so much happier without me...Mmph." Breathing a sigh the trap forced himself to come up with a reply.

 

I'm glad to hear from you Jun. It is strange to have a bed to yourself huh? I've been doing better. Dorian and the others are actually taking me out tonight. I hope you have a good day, and I love you.

 

Once the message was sent the blonde trap pulled himself from his bed and began to head off to the showers." I'll just try to forget him too. Anything to stop the pain..."

[Sosuke0549]

{ 3 weeks later }

Jun sat at a table wearing a loose black shirt and dark jeans. Dyanli was running late for there scheduled date. It had been 3 weeks since they stopped living together. And they only texted each other a few times a day and had only met once 16 days ago. He sighed , running his hand threw his hair. Where the hell was he?

Maybe he was stuck in traffic ?

Jun checked his phone.

3 weeks sure flys by...And I feel like I'm...just getting worse...Wonder how Dyanli is feeling ?

[JR_TheRandomFan]

It had been a rather eventful three weeks for Dylani.Every night the trap would be surrounded by his friends, taken to all sorts of places to keep him in high spirits. He was finally able to start his new job, which was turning out much better than he anticipated, and he had seen Dr.Leblanc another five times before. In the first time in some time the trap felt much happier, much more at peace with himself. He worried about Jun less and less, trusting that he was getting better as well. Though being late for their date wasn't a good step.

 

When walking into the café it didn't take Dylani long to find his lover. Walking to where he was seated he started to apologize." I'm so sorry for being late." He breathed before sitting down." A few co-workers and I got into a rather interesting talk about our work. Sadly the traffic here didn't help things either." That day the trap was dressed more feminine, with a white blouse,red suit jacket, and black pencil skirt. He seemed to wear some light makeup,with a dark headband on his head." I hope I haven't kept you long. Is everything going alright?"

[Sosuke0549]

When Jun saw Dyanli he stared.

" I'm so sorry for being late. A few co-workers and I got into a rather interesting talk about our work. Sadly the traffic here didn't help things either." [/Quote]

"Its fine.."

Dyanli was dressed more feminine, with a white blouse,red suit jacket, and black pencil skirt, even wearing some makeup. He wasn't use to seeing the other so .....girly .

" I hope I haven't kept you long. Is everything going alright?"[/Quote]

"You didn't. And everything is fine..just...fine"

His was observing his lover... He seemed..so much more happy. More ready for life... He couldn't remember the last time Dyanli dressed up like this. He seemed... More confident.

"You seem to be doing well. "

He said softly.

"Get anything you want.. Its my treat. "

He leaned back in his chair , folding his arms.

"....so....how have you been?"

[JR_TheRandomFan]

"I've been doing much better." Dylani replied before ordering a cup of coffee. "Dorian and the others have kept me company these last few weeks. It feels great to finally start my new job. My boss was pretty relieved to see me that she gave me a tight hug on the first day. My sessions with Dr.Leblanc have been going well.We've been able to cover a lot, coming up with ways to help with my confidence. It's why I've been dressing more,well,like this." The trap did note how Jun looked over him as he came in. It felt like from that contact alone that his lover might be doing worse. The thought of it made his chest tighten up. He would figure that Jun would be getting help too." I've been missing you Jun. It's still pretty hard not being able to see you everyday. I've been wondering if you've been doing better, if..,I've ever passed your mind when you're alone. What have you been up to Jun? Have you finished your new book? Are you sessions with Dr.Leblanc been going well? Is Yagiri doing well?"

[Sosuke0549]

Jun listened as the other spoke. But he seemed to lose himself in the others appearance. After a moment tho he looked away.

"I'm fine. I haven't been writing much. Don't really have the urge too anymore. "

He shrugged.

"And I've only went to a few sessions. I don't really care for Dr.Leblanc. The only reason agreed to see a counselor was for you. And as for Yagiri He's good. We've been catching up and hanging out a lot. Been working at the gun rang again. Since I'm not writing much anymore. Its kind of nice at times. "

He seemed a bit distant.

"I'm...really glad to see you so happy Dyanli i guess doing all this actually helped you. "

[JR_TheRandomFan]

"Y-Yeah,I suppose so." Dylani sighed before laying back against it. The more the pair talked the more the trap felt that Jun only became more distant with their separation. It was a little disheartening to see that his lover couldn't see him as he was, that he could finally ease out of his shell. Maybe Jun wasn't used to him being like this,or it could be something else. Whatever it was he had to figure it out. Once his coffee came the blonde sat himself up and toile a sip." Hm,it's my birthday next week. We'll be back together before then...I hope that we might be able to celebrate with a little trip."

[Sosuke0549]

Jun bit his lip for a moment before looking away again. He scratched the back of his head a little bit- his eyes casted downwards.

"Yeah ... About that. "

He hesitated.

"There's really.. No easy way to put it. So ill just say it.. "

He looked up at the other.

 

Was this a good time? ... What if Dyanli cried ? Made a scene? Or...did something to himself.. Jun wouldn't be able to live with himself if Dyanli harmed himself in any way.

 

He was going to break up with him...

 

He said nothing for a moment as their eyes met-

"..Actually.. Never mind. Tell you what..you pick the place..and I'll pay..it can be anywhere ok? Even a Cruise... You can go anywhere you want. Just say the word and I'll give it to you ..."

He faintly smiled at the other.

"Your my boyfriend and it'll be your birthday so ... Its only right that I spoil you. "

He reached over and took his lovers coffee - taking a sip with out his permission. Jun frowned a little shaking his head as he gave it back to Dyanli.

"Always too sweet... Just like you. "

He winked at him.

 

I couldn't do it ....

He couldn't break up with Dyanli not yet.... Not when he looked so happy and confident and with his birthday next week.

"Dyanli.. After you finish your coffee.. Why don't we go somewhere. Maybe I could take you shopping for some early birthday gifts... Yeah?"

I'm not sure how I feel about you anymore.. I'm more numb then anything. I once did really love you..but now...I'm lost.. Was I truly in love with you? Or was I in love with the idea of being in love with you? Or did I force myself to love you because I didn't want you to hurt yourself. I thought if I could fix your suffering... You'd....

"Dyanli..can I kiss you?"

He grinned mischieviously.

[JR_TheRandomFan]

For a moment Dylani could've sworn that his heart was going to stop. Something within him just told him that something was off about Jun, that he wanted to tell him something, that he would want to end it. But as soon as their eyes met that feeling wavered like his older lover held back for his sake. "So I guess this didn't help all of us as I thought it would. I still love him. I still do. But I guess his feelings for me are just so...mixed up. He wants to break up, and yet he can't bring himself to do it. It's painful to see this...to have him get worse. I guess I'm not to cure for it." Watching Jun being his usual charming self, caused a frown to cross the blonde's face, his eyes glancing over his lap and his hands holding onto his forearms as he listened." I don't think that I can bring myself to kiss you when you don't know how you feel about me Jun." he said softly." You want to break up, right? Don't lie. I can handle it." His eyes bore right into his lover's, face showing no emotion." Don't do this to yourself. Just tell me what you want to say."

[Sosuke0549]

" I don't think that I can bring myself to kiss you when you don't know how you feel about me Jun." [/Quote]

Jun's grin slowly disappeared.

"What do you--"

" You want to break up, right? Don't lie. I can handle it. Don't do this to yourself. Just tell me what you want to say."[/Quote]

Jun's eyes widened slightly. Was he surprised. Suprised that Dyanli could see right threw him? Jun bit his lip and looked down for a moment - falling silent.

" Before you could never figure me out....I guess you got better at seeing threw bull shit. "

He looked up at Dyanli.

"..Its been great not having you around. Its like a burden has been lifted off my shoulders "

Im sorry...But... You don't need me. I'm only dragging you down... Ill make sure you get over me..ill make sure you hate me...And never date someone like me again...

"No more baby sitting you. I don't know why I cared about you so much. Waiting until you were ready to have sex. Always watching what I said and did..never really showing you just how much I wanted to fuck the living shit out of you and leave. But no.. I stayed... God how stupid that was... To think you and I could actually be something.."

He laughed.

It hurts....Dyanli

"Do you know how fucking annoying you are? How much of a fucking tease you are...How much of a god damn slut you are."

He glared at him.

"You walk around acting all innocent - teasing every guy you come across acting like you want it- but the moment they ask you to spread your legs you chicken out. That face of yours... You know your so damn cute and you fuck with people.. But you want guys to force themselves on you. That's the only way you feel loved.."

He stood.

"You can take this right ? I'm not hurting you feelings am I? "

He threw some cash on the table.

"We're done. I said what I needed to...I...I don't ever wanna see you again. "

The entire time...Jun's voice was cold and heartless..but wavered when he was about to leave.

I feel so numb when I'm with you...and yet so heart broken when I'm not...what hell is wrong with me.

"Goodbye Dyanli"

I don't mean it... I take it all back ! I'm sorry ! I'm so sorry! I'm worthless ... You don't need me.. I can't make you happy... I..

He headed out of the store. His fists in his pockets and his head down.

[JR_TheRandomFan]

At that moment Dylani wasn't even sure what he was hearing. As he sat there listening to Jun spot his mind he kept the same expression on his face. Everything that the older man said did hurt, making him want to break down right there. But to his own surprise he held firm. Glaring back at him the blue bee kept silent, looking down at his lap when Jun left him there. A few moments passed before he rose himself and left." So that's how he really feels? I'm annoying,a tease,a slut? And here I thought he loved me, that he cared for me. I showed him at my weakest and he does this to me. I want to be mad. I want to scream and slap him. But...I can't...I couldn't do that to him." Stopping on a sidewalk he rubbed his eyes before letting out a soft sniff." I'm sorry that I was nothing to you Jun. I wish I wasn't such a pain..."

------------------------

 

Within a few days Dylani moved out of the man's apartment and into his old place. He didn't even try to speak to the man again. The trap felt like he would just break down if he did.

[Sosuke0549]

Once Dyanli moved out. Jun was back in his apartment. Not that he was doing much. After the break up he dove into his writing again. His depression feeding into his only outlet. He still continued to work at the shooting range. Letting out a few rounds here and there. But it didn't really ease his depression , anger , or sadness. Only his writing did a little bit of that.

{ 3 months later }

"I read the next sequel to your book. Its been approved for publishing but... What a dark turn it too. The whole point of the series is your characters relationship. To just suddenly end it-"

"My book... My characters. My story. "

His publisher sighed.

"J-Jun... Are you okay ? You-"

"Fine... Here."

He handed her a new book he had started writing.

" The Hollow Tree?"

"Yeah... That's the first 13 chapters. Read it and tell me what you think... I've been coming up with a lot of ideas recently . Its more...Gothic.. Rather then the romantic stuff I write... Anyway if its good I'll continue writing it if not I'll scrap it. Let me know what you think ... See ya"

He left the office walking home. The city was pretty busy today. He headed to the train station.

 

Jun's hair was messy. Seems he didn't care to brush it. He wore a loose pair of jeans and a tight black shirt. He looked similar to a high school delinquent if you wasn't so old.

 

On his way to the train station he stopped at Tokyo Park. It was a pretty nice day and he had nothing else better to do. He decided to go inside and find a comfy spot underneath a tree - pulling out some paper and a pen from his bag. He began to twiddle with his pen as his eyes looked around and watched all the other people playing and passing by ... Waiting to be struck with an idea. He couldn't afford to get lost in himself... So to release his pain... He wrote it on paper. Created characters to suffer with him...

[JR_TheRandomFan]

For the next rheee months the traps fortune seemed to go on the upswing. His job paid more, his college studies becoming much easier. He even stated to date again. For two weeks he had been seeing a man he met during a meeting at his work. A man named Akira.He wasn't any younger than Jun and he seemed to be a whole different person than his ex lover. It felt strange to the blonde just how different he was. One day after work Akira picked him up from his work and took him to the park, walking, talking,and taking in the sights.

"So,how was your day today hun?"

"Mm,it was okay. The usual paperwork and meeting. My hospitality assignments have been going well. Hell,they've been getting easier. How's your day been Aki? Your workers doing what they should?"

The dark haired man could only chuckle before running a hand through his hair."They are,but they're driving me insane. I can't wait to start our trip. I need the break. And you do too."

Looking back Dylani had been working hard lately. After his breakup from Jun, he had turned his sadness into drive, focusing on his work and studies so he could move on. But every once in awhile he would think of Jun. Wondering if he moved on, if he was happier without him. He had read his books and he could feel the emotion pouring from the page, like he regretted saying those things so long ago. It pained him to see it, but that was what he wanted. He knew that they had to suffer a bit in life. Jun would pull through. He knew that he could. As they walked he could've sworn that he saw his ex sitting under a tree. The trap debated weather to even look at him. He was curious to see how he was doing.

[Sosuke0549]

"Regret..."

He muttered to himself sighing. He continued to twirl and fiddle with his pen.

"How low he has fallen..."

He sighed again - yawning a little. He looked at his blank paper - waiting to write something.

"Hmm..."

When he looked up again he froze.... There... Right before his eyes ... Was Dyanli. He looked..better than ever. Happier then the day they ended things and... Standing next to him was another man.

"...that was quick. "

He whispered to himself. Dyanli was a catch. And any guy would be blessed to have him. It seems someone else found that out... And Dyanli was over him. He didn't need him..

..I'm glad..

 

tap....tap....

The sound of tears hit his paper. Jun quickly covered his face.

"Why...am I crying ?"

[JR_TheRandomFan]

After a moment the trap couldn't take it anymore. Stopping his walk he took a glance at his lover and let out an audible gasp. His ex looked so...worn down. His hair a mess, clothes baggy and disheveled. It was like he went back to the days of him being a thug. When Akira saw him stop he stopped as well, wrapping an arm around his waist before moving close.

"Dylani,what's wrong? Why'd you stop?"

"Um...I just saw my ex. You see..."

Whispering to the man he explained the situation between the two of them and how they broke up. To say that he wasn't a bit mad would be a complete lie.

"That's him huh? Well it serves him right that he to said that to you. He deserves to hurt."

Looking back to Jun Dylani could only breath a sigh before pulling away."I guess. But what kind of person would I be if I didn't forgive him? If I didn't try to talk to him?" Without another word he made his way towards Jun,keeping his hands in his pockets as a means to keep calm." Jun... Is that really you?"

[Sosuke0549]

Jun flinched hearing his name. He looked up finding Dyanli before him. His eyes were slightly red..but.. he quickly stopped his tears looking away.

"...Dyanli.."

He muttered the others name - clearing his throat. He glanced at the other male who his ex had left. He was watching them.. Dyanli's new boyfriend.

"Small world... Didn't expect to see you here..."

[JR_TheRandomFan]

"Didn't expect to see you here either." the trap replied before pulling his hands out of his pockets. Catching a glimpse at Jun's eyes before he turned away he could see that he had been crying. Dylani could recall the only other time he had seen the man cry, the moment before he would've left him the first time. Clearing his throat Dylani began to speak again." Seems that things have taken an interesting turn. Your books are doing well. I've caught up to all of them. Pretty interesting reads. Find anyone new? You know,someone that isn't as whiny,or sluty than I was?"

[Sosuke0549]

"Seems that things have taken an interesting turn. Your books are doing well. I've caught up to all of them. Pretty interesting reads.[/Quote]

"I try. "

" Find anyone new? You know,someone that isn't as whiny,or sluty than I was?"[/Quote]

"Ooo- feisty.. "

He laughed a little.

"And no.. Your one of a kind. ~"

He stood grabbing his things glancing at his replacement .

"...All things a side..I knew it wouldn't take you long to find someone better..if you'll excuse me.."

He started walking away.

[JR_TheRandomFan]

Letting out a single grunt the trap was quick t grab onto Jun's shoulder before he got too far." What makes you think you were any worse?" he asked, his gaze not meeting his." As surprising as it might be, I still think about you. I still care for you even after all of the shit you said to me on that day. We've only seen each for two weeks. I can't say that Akira is any better than you were Jun.I hope that you might pull out of this slump, just like I did, just like how I'm still doing. I'll see you Jun....Try to get better if not for me, then for yourself." After he said his piece the trap went back to his new lover's side and went back to walking.

"You must really still care for him...I thought you would tell him off."

"As much as I wanted to, I couldn't...not to anyone, even him. I guess I'm too forgiving. Heh, another weakness to add to the list. So Aki, when are we leaving for our trip again?"

The pair would go back to planning their trip, the trap's gaze slightly moving back to where Jun had sat."Just get better Jun...It pains me to see you so hurt..."

[Sosuke0549]

Jun didn't look at him.. Nor did he say anything. Once Dyanli said what he had to say and let him go. He left the park heading back home, lost in his thoughts.

 

{ 1 year later }

"Another best seller. I heard you were getting a award for your series. "

Jun was dressed up nicely. Wearing a tux and that charming smile on his lips. He was celebrating at a party with friends on the announcement of his Hollow Tree Series being a best seller out of the country. He smiled at the female talking to him. A fan no doubt.

"What inspired you?"

"One of my ex's...I guess you could say our break up inspired me.."

He cleared his throat .

" if you'll excuse me"

He left and searched the party finding a slightly younger male with bright red hair and piercing green eyes outside. Escaping the crowd and music.

"Thought I might find you here. "

The younger male frowned.

"Sorry..."

Jun smirked.

"Don't apologize. I needed a break too.."

He reached out and took the red heads hand- bringing it to his lips.

"As soon as we leave..I'm going to ravish -"

"S-stop it ! You know I hate it when you say things like that to me j-jun"

"Do you ?... Because your blushing... "

"S-so..."

Jun laughed - pulling the boy closer.

"How I wish I could pin you down right now~"

"J-Jun !"

The writer bit the younger males ear making him flinch. The small male squirmed biting back a moan.

"Such cute reactions... I want you so badly Yukina."

The red head began to pant as Jun's hand touched his crotch.

"Nnngh~ n..no..n-not here"

After a moment - Jun pulled away. Leaving his new lover wanting more.

"Fine...Ill keep my hands to myself until we get home -"

Jun was suddenly cut off when Yukina landed a kiss on his lips. Leaving him a little surprised.

"Jerk don't tease me .."

He lightly smacked his cheek and pulled away to go back inside.

Jun bit his lip watching him- smiling softly.

"......Yukina..."

 

It had only been 2 months but Jun had started dating the red head. It took him a while to move on from Dyanli. But once he did ... He got better.