Onlymeneko Posted June 26, 2017 Share Posted June 26, 2017 Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings. - Robert Bloch Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Onlymeneko Posted June 26, 2017 Share Posted June 26, 2017 “I like holding the door for people who are far away, you know so they have to run a little.” – Bill Murray Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Onlymeneko Posted June 26, 2017 Share Posted June 26, 2017 Sometimes it is very important if a sentence was said by a man or a woman. A good example: “I used a whole pack of tissues during that awesome movie yesterday!” - - - Updated - - - Broccoli: Hey, I look like a tree. Mushroom: Wow, I look just like an umbrella. Walnut: I look exactly like a brain. Banana: Man, can we change the topic please? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Onlymeneko Posted June 26, 2017 Share Posted June 26, 2017 An almost hysterical man calls 911 and yells, "Please come quickly! Kailey is pregnant and her labor started now, it’s really intense!" "Is this her first child?" asks the operator. "No you dumbass! It’s her husband!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Onlymeneko Posted June 26, 2017 Share Posted June 26, 2017 My boss told me yesterday, “Don’t dress for the job you have, dress for the job you want”. But when I turned up at the office today in Ghostbusters gear, the bastard said I was fired. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Onlymeneko Posted June 26, 2017 Share Posted June 26, 2017 A man to a psychiatrist: “How do you select who should be admitted to your facility?” The psychiatrist replies: “We fill a bathtub with water and give the person a spoon, a cup and a bucket. Then we ask that person to empty the bathtub.” The man smiles: “Ah, I understand, if you are sane you would take the bucket.” The Psychiatrist replies: “No, a sane guy pulls the plug. Do you want a room with or without a balcony?” Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Onlymeneko Posted June 26, 2017 Share Posted June 26, 2017 A woman looking for a relationship places an ad, saying, “Looking for a guy that won’t beat me, won’t run away on me and will satisfy me nicely. Am good looking, excellent cook.” Three days later, there’s a loud knocking at her door. Behind it there’s a guy with no arms and no legs, smiling expectantly. “Dear Amy,” he says, “I have no arms so I couldn’t even beat you if I tried. I have no legs and I can’t run away on you. I’m your guy.” “That’s very nice,” says Amy, surprised, “but how will you be able to satisfy me?” His smile widens, “You did hear the knocking, didn’t you?” How Dirty... :Excited: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crystald Posted June 28, 2017 Author Share Posted June 28, 2017 . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crystald Posted June 28, 2017 Author Share Posted June 28, 2017 . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crystald Posted June 28, 2017 Author Share Posted June 28, 2017 . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crystald Posted June 28, 2017 Author Share Posted June 28, 2017 . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crystald Posted June 28, 2017 Author Share Posted June 28, 2017 . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crystald Posted June 28, 2017 Author Share Posted June 28, 2017 . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crystald Posted June 28, 2017 Author Share Posted June 28, 2017 . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crystald Posted June 28, 2017 Author Share Posted June 28, 2017 . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crystald Posted June 28, 2017 Author Share Posted June 28, 2017 . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crystald Posted June 28, 2017 Author Share Posted June 28, 2017 . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crystald Posted June 28, 2017 Author Share Posted June 28, 2017 . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crystald Posted June 30, 2017 Author Share Posted June 30, 2017 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ryuu_L Posted June 30, 2017 Share Posted June 30, 2017 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crystald Posted June 30, 2017 Author Share Posted June 30, 2017 . Adorable!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crystald Posted June 30, 2017 Author Share Posted June 30, 2017 . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crystald Posted July 1, 2017 Author Share Posted July 1, 2017 :_red_fox 13 :_red_fox 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr.Doomsday Posted July 2, 2017 Share Posted July 2, 2017 I want to put a smile on a pretty girl's face, who deserves it. So I brought you flowers, Please Register/ Sign In, in order to see the links. . I hope you like them and they make you feel better. :3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
batista Posted July 2, 2017 Share Posted July 2, 2017 Please Register/ Sign In, in order to see the links. my spatzl thank you so much for your support, warmth and friendship and for making me smile like an idiot because of this post and making me laugh every time we spend time together. you are too cute foxy2 ich hab dich lieb *chu* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now