The Dollhouse (Pigeon & Noise Prince)

[Noise Prince]

"It's a bit early to be talking about taking vacations, isn't it?" Bruno replied, chuckling a little. It was his first day, he wasn't exactly worn dreary from work, as if such a job could wear on him. So far he's only eaten and accompanied Shiori, this felt as much a vacation as anything. Then Bruno wondered if he was trying to suggest that Shiori liked to be alone while Carn was away, including the staff member whose job was to essentially monitor him. He felt a little sad. It was understandable, but he really liked Shiori, and being with him, and he felt like Shiori liked his company as well, so it seemed more sad if he wanted to be totally alone when he had the chance.

 

"Though I guess I wouldn't really be planning them, if Carn leaves when he leaves, and you'd like to be alone..."

[Kotorichan]

Shiori's eyes widened at the man's words and he looked over in panic. "N-no, I did not mean it that way. I truly enjoy your company. However..." His shoulders slumped as he looked away again, wishing to hide his own sadness. "This is merely your job. If it becomes too much trouble you will quit so you can continue with your life..." His eyes finally fluttered closed, his last defense against tears. "If you do that then I shall be alone until he can find someone else to take your place. Even when that happens there shall be no way to know if I will enjoy their presence the way I enjoy yours. I would prefer to have you feel free to take breaks as often as possible instead of force you to stay here and have you leave within a few months."

[Noise Prince]

Bruno's face lit up in a way he didn't care to disguise as anything else. Hiding his feelings was never a strong suit of his, but he was definitely not in the practice of masking when he was happy. He was very surprised with how open and honest Shiori was with someone who was still a mere stranger to him, especially considering Carn's tight control of him. Maybe it was because of Carn's treatment that he felt the need to become close to the people he could be in contact with...

 

"Awe, well even if it's just my job, running from my responsibilities first chance I get isn't very good work ethic, eh? Besides, I don't want to do anything that would make you lonely and sad. I enjoy your presence too, I care about you."

 

He couldn't imagine wanting to leave Shiori for an elongated vacation, even if the job became very rigorous and challenging. It would probably be just as much a vacation for him just to have Carn away. He'd like to be with Shiori when Carn was far away from him, when he had his freedom, and his peace. He wouldn't want to miss out on that. Besides, as sweet as Shiori was, he really overestimated Bruno's skills, speaking as if quitting and finding new work would be simple for him. Even if he hated Shiori and hated the job, he wouldn't quit. There wasn't an awful lot he was going to be able to do beyond work like this. And despite learning how awful a man Carn was, and that he treated his wife so terribly, he really enjoyed his job so far. He liked Shiori a lot. He liked him so much Bruno, with typically little self insight, was starting to worry about why he liked him so much so quickly. He could end up getting himself in trouble.

[Kotorichan]

"I do not think you could do anything to make me feel any more sad or lonely than I already feel." Shiori forced a slight laugh before returning to his breakfast. His hair fell across his face, almost getting in his food. He stopped suddenly as he heard the distance sound of the house telephone ringing. He bit his lip and sat up straighter. "Oh no... That is never a good thing." He quickly stood up and began to make his way back to his sewing room.

[Noise Prince]

Bruno frowned a little, struggling to find a response in his mind. He felt frustrated, Shiori said that he enjoyed his company, but Bruno felt like he kept making him sad. His long, silky hair fell over his face as he leaned over his breakfast, a few strands curtaining him in streaks, teasingly, almost. A bit hung daringly over his food. Just before he had come up with a suitable response, a phone suddenly rang, and Bruno jolted in his seat. But despite his over-reaction, he was clearly less upset than Shiori was. Bruno took his cane from the floor and stood up, about to go after Shiori, looking back at the plates of half-eaten breakfast foods, feeling bad for leaving them, but then back at Shiori's back as he left. And he was the priority here, so he followed suit.

 

"What is it? What does it mean?"

[Kotorichan]

"I do not know. It could be that he is coming home early. It could be something else but he is usually the only one to call." Shiori stopped in the hallway where a servant was answering the phone. He stood quietly, chewing his lip. It almost looked as though he was awaiting his own execution. His hands clenched at his sides, his brow furrowed in fear.

 

Finally the servant hung up the phone and turned to Shiori. "Don't worry, he isn't coming home early. He actually said that he'll be out late tonight and might even be out all night."

 

Shiori let out a sigh of relief and murmured something in his native tongue. It looked as though he might even cry from relief. "I am sorry if I worried you Mr. Bruno. It seems that I have overreacted."

[Noise Prince]

Bruno felt his brows furrow deeper the more nervous Shiori looked, his eyes as locked on his boss' wife as Shiori's were on the servant at the phone. Bruno wished he could take Shiori's hand, since he was so upset about the possibility of Carn coming home early. How dreadful, that his returning early would make him this upset. Did he feel like this every time Carn came home?

 

The deer grinned when the servant told them that Carn might not even return tonight at all. How fortunate! He looked at Shiori, expecting him to be happy, but he looked somewhat sorrowful. Bruno didn't understand what it was he had said, and he didn't understand why the following statement was an apology.

 

"Awe, you don't need to apologize to me!" He assured him. "I'm just as happy to hear that he'll be late."

[Kotorichan]

Shiori shook his head, trying to fight back tears. "I am sorry... I do not wish to be such a burden upon you. I do not wish for my unhappiness to inconvenience or worry you." The crane buried his face in his hands. "I am sorry... I was once able to hold myself together so much better. But it seems as though I can not take much more of this..."

 

A soft sob shook his shoulders. The servant glanced at Bruno before bowing and hurrying away. None of the servants knew how to deal with Shiori's despair. They couldn't do anything about the situation and didn't want to give the crane any false hope.

[Noise Prince]

Bruno couldn't think of what to say. He wanted to make him feel better, he wanted to make him feel cared for, and safe, and that he had someone dependable to rely on. He wanted to say something that would never make Shiori feel like he needed to apologize ever again, he wanted to say something that would somehow prevent Carn from ever returning home.

 

The cane fell to the floor. Bruno couldn't say anything, but his body had other ideas, and he leaned forward, took Shiori's elbow, and pulled him into his chest, resting his sobs on his shoulder. He didn't have anything else he could offer, but he had at least this, which was better than nothing.

[Kotorichan]

Shiori hiccuped softly and leaned into the man's shoulder. "I hate this life... I hate that I have no hope... I hate being a burden..." He found himself clinging desperately to the deer's chest, his body shaking. "I am so sorry that you have to be here for this. I am so sorry..."

 

"If..." His sobs grew even more desperate, making his voice almost impossible to understand. "If I were to e-end my life, you would be the one to take the blame... I wish you did not have to be here for that, you are t-too kind to take his anger. B-but I do not know if I can stay longer than you."

[Noise Prince]

Sunday, June 4, 2017

9:17 AM

 

Bruno wanted to squeeze him tighter, but he felt so small and frail against his chest as it was, he felt he could accidentally hurt him quite easy if he was careless. Like a porcelain doll. The last thing he wanted was to hurt him even further, when he was so tormented in every minute of his life. He couldn't bare that he was in this pain as it was, he never wanted to be a source of it, but Shiori was so kind-hearted, that he still thought of Bruno and apologized for things Bruno hadn't been experiencing. His stay here hadn't exactly been happy, since it'd been quite clear from the beginning that Shiori was suffering, but he'd never be happy being elsewhere again, knowing Shiori was stuck in a mansion-shaped prison here. He couldn’t help himself, he knew that somehow, he was forever connected with Shiori.

 

"Shiori…" Bruno struggled to understand what Shiori was saying as he sobbed into his shoulder. His shirt was feeling heavier with the fabric becoming tear-soaked. Despite himself, he held him tighter. Shiori was burdened with far too much, and he wanted to take that weight off his slight shoulders. He could understand, in his sobs, that he was afraid of Carn being angry with Bruno. Something he should never have to be concerned about. Bruno's hand had found itself underneath the curtain of long silky hair to lightly cup the nape of the crane's neck.

 

"You're my responsibility now, please don't worry about my well-being. I'm here to take care of you, all right?" Bruno's other hand loosened around the crane, and wandered to the small of his back, resting in the delicate curve. It was subconscious, but completely inappropriate to be touching him in this way.

[Kotorichan]

Shiori whimpered softly as he felt the man's hand lowering on his back. It wasn't from fear, just confusion. Wasn't Bruno afraid that he might be punished by Carn for doing such a thing? Wasn't he worried that Shiori would reject him? In truth it made him happy to be touched intimately but also gently. Even the fact that Bruno didn't seem worried about the consequences of such an action made Shiori feel happy. It felt like Bruno was brave enough to protect him.

 

The crane snuggled closer to the man's chest, hiccuping again. "Y-you c-cannot take care of me..." He whimpered. "B-because he will always come back and hurt me again... No matter how happy you make me, I always know that h-he will be back soon. A-and I will never escape. I am here f-forever..."

[Noise Prince]

Bruno hesitated when Shiori whimpered slightly, and realized he had placed his hand at the small of his back! He was afraid that he had gone too far, touched him too intimately, and had upset him, but Shiori didn't seem to dislike it. He stayed still in his arms. Which Bruno was surprised by, because his heart was beating so hard that he thought that Shiori would start vibrating leaning into him like this.

 

Shiori said he made him happy… He wished that was all that was said, instead of buried in a hopeless statement. He didn't know how to respond. He wished he could promise him he could keep him safe, he wished he could tell him how he was going to do it. He wished he could lay out an escape plan. But he couldn't do any of that. He really couldn't do anything more than what he was doing now, just lending him his body for comfort, and he could hardly manage that. Bruno slightly shifted his weight, slowly, slowly, to his good foot, as his bad leg was starting to tremble, and he didn't want to fall, taking Shiori with him.

 

"Then I'm here forever, too," Bruno told him. "You're right, I can't take care of you the way you need. But what I can do is… what I can. I'll do everything I can for you. I might only make you happy, I might only be able to hug you, today, but tomorrow, I might be able to do a little more.

It might be a while before I can relieve even a little suffering… but I promise I will. Somehow, eventually, we'll figure things out more and more."

[Kotorichan]

Shiori's tears finally stopped and he looked up at the man, lightly biting his lip. He lightly rested his hands on the deer's chest, his head tilting slightly. "Then... If you cannot take me from this place..." He felt as though he was in a trance, like this was all a dream. Perhaps it was all a dream. Bruno's kindness seemed too good to be true. His promises seemed too perfect. "Perhaps you can make it so that I forget where I am..." He leaned in and pressed a gentle kiss to the man's lips, his eyelashes fluttering closed.

 

He wanted so badly to he held gently. Held by someone who would make him feel loved and protected. Then maybe he could pretend that he was married to someone else.

[Noise Prince]

The delicate bird seemed to stop crying, and Bruno felt his head raise to look at him, and he in turn looked down to him. There was a soft, dreamy look in his eyes, slight droplets clung to his long lashes. He looked like a painting, all soft, almost blurry strokes of gentle colors to depict the purest of tearful faces. Bruno lifted his hand from the small of Shiori's back, and braced himself against the wall without as he pressed into him, pressing his lips onto his servant's.

 

He wished he could have held him tighter when their lips met, it seemed like such a natural, simple thing to do. He wanted to keep him enclosed in his arms, to feel protected and guarded, like his arms created a barrier where he could forget about where he was except for with Bruno. His lips were very soft and very warm. It was like one might expect a kiss between a wealthy man's wife and former laborer would be like- his were soft and smooth, and Bruno's were slightly chapped. It felt so good to kiss him, he forgot about his embarrassment at needing to hold to the wall. He realized now just how badly he had wanted to kiss Shiori, how he had loved him from the start. Even if Shiori just needed him like this for escaping his situation by forgetting for a moment, that didn't change a thing for Bruno.

 

After a few moments, which felt like an eternity between them, Bruno had to break away when he nearly fell backwards. Heat rushed over his face, his eyes widened, mortified. He awkwardly bent down and reached for the cane he discarded to the floor moments ago, and pushed himself back up, his mouth struggling to form words of apology. He didn't want Shiori to think that he was rejecting him.

 

"I-I'm sorry, so sorry... I wasn't... I mean I'm..." His face grew hotter and it seemed to extend from his face down his neck and over his chest. "I-I do want to help you forget..."

[Kotorichan]

Shiori melted into the kiss, it felt like the world around him had fallen away. All he could think of was the feeling of the man's lips. His skin felt rough, but his movements were so gentle. It felt as though his body had been yearning for this since the moment he first met Bruno.

 

All of that relaxation slipped away as the kiss was broken. He watched as the deer gave what he could only describe as a horrified expression.

 

Then came the man's words. Apologies... And then sating that he did want to help him forget... But he seemed so flustered. Shiori's heart broke as he came to a conclusion. "Ah..." He stepped back, his eyes burning with tears. Of course, Bruno had wanted to help him... But not like this. This was just Bruno's job, at the most Shiori would be his friend. But lover? Especially when it could cause him to lose his job? That was impossible. "I am sorry, I forgot myself."

 

The crane couldn't bring himself to meet the man's eyes, afraid that he would find disgust there. "P-please excuse me." He turned away and bolted for the garden.

[Noise Prince]

"No…no… Shio…" Bruno's words faltered as the bird ran from him down the hall, towards the gardens outside. He wasn't usually one to spite his leg, but he definitely cursed it now. He wished it could support him just enough for something like this. He couldn't even hold and kiss Shiori… how was he going to provide what he needed? What would make him feel just a bit happier? Now he was the cause of Shiori's pain. He wasn't sure if it was a good idea to go after him, but that's what Bruno did. He hadn't seen the gardens during the day, he saw them at dinner, also following Shiori, his wings glowed like a blessing in the bright moonlight. He hated that the second time he followed Shiori outdoors was because he had upset him.

 

"Shiori…" He opened the doors outside. "Shiori?"

[Kotorichan]

Shiori had crumpled to the ground outside, his face buried in his hands as he sobbed. His slender body shaking like a leaf. Why had he done such a stupid thing? Why had he thought that Bruno might have feelings for him? No one could love him aside from someone like Carn, someone who only liked the idea of Shiori.

 

He jumped at the sound of Bruno's voice and looked up, cheeks stained with tears. "Please..." He whimpered, his wings spreading as he threatened to take flight. "I am sorry... Please do not hate me..."

[Noise Prince]

Shiori's delicate form was in a heap on the ground, almost disrespectful to the fine silks Shiori was dressed in, and moreso to the beauty wrapped in them. Someone as beautiful as Shiori should never be crying on the ground. Such a thing hurt Bruno's heart so much he had to grab his chest for a minute. Though Shiori looked up quickly when Bruno called his name, so he didn't have to see such a sight for long.

 

Bruno eased himself down the stairs towards the crane before he spread his wings out, the expansive length imposing, Bruno stopped himself where he stood.

 

"O-oh, Shiori… I can't forgive you if you have nothing to be sorry for," Bruno told him gently, smiling. "I don't hate you, I can't… I don't think I'd ever be able to, no matter what." He took another tentative step towards Shiori. "I-In fact, it's the opposite," He said, that was as bold as he could go, a furious heat burning behind the skin of his face.

[Kotorichan]

Shiori looked up at the man, his eyes still full of tears. "B-but... I was stupid. I thought that you might want that sort of relationship. That you might think I was worth l-loving..." He let out another sob and curled up into a tight ball. "No one could l-love me... I was so stupid."

 

"You were just being kind and I- I-" He shook his head. "I thought that meant you felt something... I am so desperate that I took the smallest sign of affect and..." His body began to shake with sobs. The crane's wings folded around him, forming a cocoon that blocked him from the rest of the world. "I am sorry...'

[Noise Prince]

Those rich, deep eyes were still full of tears when he looked up at him. It was one of the most beautiful things he wished he never had to see, before Shiori curled inward, hiding his face from Bruno's view. He walked towards him, wanting to lift his face up, kiss his forehead, his lips again. He wanted him to know he wasn't stupid. He wanted him to know they already had that sort of relationship, from the moment Shiori decided he would have him, Bruno has been his. But before he could get close enough, the white angelic wings circled around Shiori like a feathery shield.

 

He grunted a little as he struggled to lower himself to the ground, in front of Shiori, where he thought his face was underneath the feathers.

 

"Shiori… earlier… when I… it's wasn't about you, it wasn't because I think you're not lovable. But my… it's my leg. I wanted badly to be able to give you what you wanted, and I wish I could have given you something as simple as being able to hold you." His voice was trembling as he spoke. He never really thought much about it until now. He knew since his injury that his life was changed, the way he would do things, the things he was able to do. But he never thought about, until now, he wouldn't be able to lift up a loved one on his own two feet for more than a few seconds. He lost his balance earlier putting all his weight on one leg. What if he couldn't even give Shiori his escape? What if he was too inadequate?

[Kotorichan]

Shiori hiccupped softly and let his wings fall back just enough to see the man. "You mean... You were not apologizing because you did not want to help me in that way..?"

 

"I am sorry, i did not notice that i was causing you pain..." He lightly bit his lip and stared at the deer for a moment before looking away, his cheeks flushing. "If you would like... You may hold me now." He said, his voice barely audible.

[Noise Prince]

Bruno grinned bashfully and nodded. He was glad he could explain himself, when he thought he'd done a poor job. Choosing the right words was never really Bruno's strongest skill at times. He was glad to be able to see his face, now the tears had stopped. Bruno moved himself a little closer to him on the ground.

 

"You weren't hurting me," He whispered softly, leaning in hesitantly, before wrapping his arms around him, gently pulling him closer. Everything seemed to suddenly go by like the flick of a whip. The moments seemed slow and drawn out when happening, but now it felt like everything from the first hug up to this one happened in seconds. He could hardly believe it was real. It was something he thought he'd need to be careful of, his feelings for Shiori. He wasn't sure what form they'd take when he realized he loved him, and he never wanted to be inappropriate or a bother.

 

But now... they might be playing a much more dangerous game. Bruno couldn't care, though, not while he had this beautiful crane against his chest.

[Kotorichan]

A sift coo escaped Shiori's throat as he pressed into the man's chest. His eyes fluttered closed as he rested his head on Bruno's shoulder. "But... You had to pull away because your leg hurt... So I made you feel pain. " he frowned, knowing that he was having trouble explaining what he meant.

 

His wings moved to cocoon both of them, his soft feathers brushing against Bruno's back. "I was not thinking of your feelings... I am sorry."

 

He looked up at the deer through his thick white lashes. "Will you forgive me?" His body shifted position slightly, putting him almost fully onto Bruno's good leg.

[Noise Prince]

Bruno smiled, and lightly stroked Shiori's long hair when he rested his head on his shoulder, and he lightly placed his cheek on the top of his head.

 

"Nothing about my leg is your fault. I'm still not a good judge of my limits yet, so I'm the only one responsible," He told him. He didn't want Shiori to feel like that was his fault. Shiori would be even less knowledgeable about his physical limitations, so it wouldn't be fair at all. The morning sun was blocked by a large white wing surrounding the two of them.

 

"You don't need my forgiveness," He assured him again, and kissed his head. He held him a little tighter. He was so sweet, and gentle, and kind. He felt so slight underneath the abundance of fabric, despite the magnificent wingspan he sported. Part of him was quite relieved that he wouldn't have to be fighting the urge to hold and touch him, so damn the risks…

 

He hoped the staff, if they were to find out, which was quite likely, would be supportive and keep their secret. Bruno wanted to stay here for a very long time.