[Zombie in a Box & Gladis] Breaking Habits

[Zombie_In_A_Box]

William, for the first time in forever, felt like he'd done something good again. Not just his job. His job didn't require him to do so much to help a delinquent. To hear Silas thank him, to say that William was why he kept on trying to get better - it really warmed his heart. "I kept on trying because I knew you had it in you to get on the right track. You're not bad by nature... I feel like you've just had bad luck." William murmured, running a hand over his hair before allowing his fingers to lightly brush by his stubble on the way down. He should have shaved.

 

"What... Happened to your parents, actually? I don't think I've ever seen them. Do you keep any contact with them?" William asked, once again pulling the conversation away from himself. It wasn't really intentional, however. He just wanted to know more about Silas. He wanted to keep on helping him however he could. His own parents were both dead. His mother died while giving birth to him, and his father died when he was eighteen, just out of high school. William didn't have anyone taking care of him from that point. Come to think of it, it was quite tragic. He didn't have any close family... He couldn't really say he had friends, either. If he died, how many people would come to his funeral? How many people would actually miss him? How many wouldn't even realize he was dead? He didn't like thinking about dying, but... Lately the theme became more and more frequent in his head. It was a bit depressing, if anything.

[Gladis]

Bad luck, huh? He supposed that could be considered part of it. Most would argue that he was a victim of circumstance, but Silas felt it was too easy to just put the blame on that. He'd still had a choice in some of it. Sometimes being 'bad' felt good. So he'd given in to it. Of course, part of it had been a protest. Part of it had been a means to escape a harsh reality. Part of it had been childish naivity. But it had still been a choice.

 

"Regardless of why you did it, I'm very grateful."

 

He paused when he was asked about his parents, a revealingly grim smile crossing his features.

 

"My mother is doing well, I'd suppose." As well as she possibly could in her circumstances. "I talk to her sometimes, but not if it can be avoided. My dad... well, honestly I don't know and I don't care. I pretty much haven't spoken to him since I moved out. He's probably wasting away on a park bench somewhere, hugging his beloved whisky bottle..." There was an obvious note of disdain in his voice. He sighed. "I'm sorry, I know I sound really bitter. But I wasn't joking when I said that moving out was probably one of the best choices I've made." Even if that had meant living with Damian for a while. Well, back then he hadn't really minded, he supposed. They had after all been a couple.

 

"Would you like me to get you another cup of coffee? This time I'll pay. That was the agreement, after all." He asked with a slight smile.

[Zombie_In_A_Box]

A faint smile showed on William's face when Silas apologized for speaking ill of his father. "I'm pretty sure you have every right not only to sound bitter but to be bitter as well." He muttered out softly, letting out a soft sigh as he stared at his empty cup. As if reading his thoughts, Silas offered a cup of coffee all of a sudden. William's smile widened just a tad as he looked up, tilting his head to the side slightly. "I won't refuse... Can you grab me a slice of the cherry pie?" He asked, pulling his wallet out to give Silas the money for his pie, at least. He wanted something sweet.

 

"Say... What do you want to get in life? Let's say you get the job, get enough money, then what?" He asked curiously, comfortably crossing his legs underneath the table. God, he could remember the time when he still had big goals in life. Nowadays it was more wake up, go to work, eat, go back to sleep. No goals, no motivation... William felt like he was losing himself. It wasn't a particularly nice feeling. There were times where he wasn't even sure he was real. During those times, he sometimes tried to cause pain to himself just to make sure that he was still there. That he was still himself. At least physically. Nothing enough to cause a wound or a scar, however... Although he did have bruises. They helped him remind him of his existence, at least.

[Gladis]

Silas couldn't help but chuckle softly, though there was a note of bitterness in his voice. He smiled wryly. "You don't even know half of it." Still, he was glad when they changed subject. Talking about his father wasn't a mood raiser. He liked to think about him even less than Damian. Damian... damn it, why did his mind have to go in circles like that? He'd meant to be enjoying this... semi-date-thing with William, not dwell on old and unwanted memories.

 

"You don't have to pay for the cake. I feel like this is the least I can do." He said, getting up from his seat. "I'll get you your pie." He flashed a warm smile, then turned his back on William before he could protest. Heading over to the counter, he ordered the pie and another cup of coffee, returning to their table a few moments later. "Heeeeere you go." He he said softly, placing both on the table before sitting down again.

 

William's question took him aback, if only a little. He paused.

 

"I... I don't know..." he admitted sheepishly. "I guess... I'm happy as long as I have a steady income and some stability in my life. That's all I really need. I don't have any big dreams I want to pursue." He didn't believe he would have managed anyway, even if he had some. Thinking about it just made him feel like his life was kind of sad, though what he said was true. He really didn't ask for much, but sometimes it seemed he couldn't even have that.

 

"Hey, William... why did you become a cop? If you don't mind me asking..."

[Zombie_In_A_Box]

William let out a quiet scoff, pushing his wallet back into his pocket. Well, if Silas wanted to treat him to some pie as well, he didn't find any reason to refuse, again. He did feel like the other was in debt to him... All those times he pulled him out of a dirty prison cell deserved some sort of payment. Even if it was just pie. When the man came back and was faced with the question, William could see the gears turning in his head. The answer wasn't as much surprising as it was disappointing. "You should, though. A big goal could help you keep your life in check." He muttered out, pulling the pie closer to himself. The man cut off a small piece, bringing it to his mouth. He really loved cherry pies...

 

He tilted his head when the question was asked. "I never really had great grades in school, but I was physically active, so that's one thing. And..." William looked down, grabbing the hot cup of coffee. "When I was eighteen, my father got shot." He muttered out, taking a sip of the drink. "Never found the man who killed him, though." He added quietly, his lips pulling into a tight frown. This wasn't the only reason, however. "Besides... I like helping people like you. At least if you actually succeed." He let out a light smile, tilting his head to look at Silas. "I like feeling like I can make a difference."

[Gladis]

"A big goal like what, though? Most kids my age would say they want to become rich and famous, but honestly I care for neither. I... I'm a high school drop out, but even if I went back to catch up with my education... I don't think I'm smart or hardworking enough to become something proper like a laywer or doctor or whatever. I don't have any special talents, except for... getting myself in trouble. I said I'm fairly good at cooking and baking, but it's nothing out of the ordinary. Probably nowhere near good enough to do it professionally." Or perhaps he was, but even then, he didn't really think he had a burning passion for it. It was just a fun hobby – nothing he could make a proper living of. Especially not without the right training.

 

He sighed softly, gazing into his almost empty coffee cup. "I don't even have the desire to eventually settle down with a wife and kids or whatever later. There's not really..." he paused, blinking. Maybe there were some things he did want. He glanced up. "I guess it'd be nice to travel." A slight smile tugged the corners of his lips at the thought. "I've never really been abroad, and there's so many places I'd like to see." But then his mood wavered again, the harsh reality seeping into his mind. "Though I suppose I won't ever really have the money for that..."

 

William's answer came as a slight shock. He couldn't even begin to imagine what that must have been like. To lose a person one held so dearly. Silas relationshio with his own parents wasn't great, but he knew that wasn't the norm.

 

"Oh... I see..." he said quietly. "I'm sorry to hear that." Though when William mentioned his second reason, Silas couldn't help but smile. "You've certainly made a difference to me."

[Zombie_In_A_Box]

William sighed, shaking his head lightly. "You're setting yourself up for failure if you think that way. Don't immediately think that you won't be able to do something, that you won't succeed or that you're not good enough. Try. This new job would be the perfect opportunity for you to work on your cooking. Work hard and one day you may even have your very own cafe, or a restaurant, or- or whatever you want." The man said, a light smile crossing his face.

 

"Travelling is a great goal. Keep that in mind when working gets hard. Make a list of every place you want to visit. You can find people that will take you in when you go to another country. This can help you drive your life further. You can't give up without even trying." He urged the younger man, a soft sigh passing his lips as he leaned back, stuffing a big piece of cherry pie into his mouth. "I'm really glad you think I made a difference." He muttered out quietly, taking his coffee to help the pie go down his throat. He was beginning to feel even more tired than usual. William was willing to blame that on actually interacting with someone socially. People often tired him out... He couldn't show it, though. At least not yet. He had to suck it up and keep moving.

[Gladis]

Silas wasn’t sure exactly what kind of response he’d been expecting, but it sure as hell wasn’t the motivational speech that he got. Unable to keep his lips from forming a small grin.

 

”Dude, listening to you almost makes it seem like anything is possible. Perhaps it’s too early to be giving up quite yet. After all, I’ve already made it this far.” Leaning back in his chair with a look of contentment spreading across his features, he got a proper look at William for the first time. It was then that he noticed how utterly exhausted the man appeared. Though he seemed to be trying his best to conceal it, even a dimwitt like Silas could tell something wasn’t quite right. No, this wasn’t even the first time he’d noticed. Earlier, too. Yet he knew full and well that it was none of his business. That William more than likely would not appreciate if he pried. That was what he kept telling himself as he attempted to redirect his thoughts. And yet it was hard. What else that even felt relevant could he talk about? He was getting unessecarily awkward, perhaps even a bit nervous, and it showed in how he increasingly started to fidget with the spoon he’d previously used for his coffee.

 

”You totally made a difference, so please don’t underestimate yourself.” He finally said to break the silence, his voice soft and his expression uncharacteristically serious. That said, slowly but surely his expression softened and a reassuring smile spread across his features. ”I don’t know what’s troubling you right now, but whatever it is, it’ll get better for sure. You’re a good person and good people deserve happiness.”

[Zombie_In_A_Box]

William closed his eyes, clenching his teeth slightly. So no matter how hard he tried to hide his tiredness, it still showed, huh? He breathed out quietly, opening his eyes to look at the man in front of him. "I'm glad you think so." He muttered out, managing a small smile before downing his coffee and pie.

 

"Do you want to go and get something stronger? There's a nice bar down the street." William suggested, tilting his head slightly. "My treat." He added with a light, almost playful smile. He didn't like drinking, but he knew that it would help him relax a little bit. Have some fun. "Or would you prefer a club?" He asked, crossing his legs underneath the table. He wanted to lose himself a little bit. He wanted to forget about his pitiful life, his troubles, his never-ending depression... Maybe he could lose himself in another person. Perhaps he would get lucky. He didn't really care whether it was a guy or a girl, or someone in between... He hadn't had sex in so long. He needed a little bit something to pick him up. Even if only for a few hours. He wanted to live again.