Behind Those Doors (Pigeon x Silverwyn)

[Kotorichan]

Hio let out a soft chuckle at the idea. "I hope I get to see that reaction. Just that shock alone would be enough selfish revenge for me..." He looked over at Cael with a slight smile. "You really do make it sound easy. I know it won't be, but it gives me a bit of hope."

 

His gaze dropped again, his tone becoming serious. "When should we make our move? And how should I get control over the palace again? The guards are all working for the council, and I would imagine that any kind of resistance that might be growing would want me dead. In fact it wouldn't surprise me if everyone in this country either hated me or was working for the council. I am the one who takes the blame for all the choices made." He let out a soft sigh. "I apologize, this sounds like I'm looking for pity doesn't it?"

[Silverwyn]

Caelan shook his head. "You worry your head too much." He berated.

"I have a brilliant plan forming. We can't move until I finish healing and I figure by then you should be fully recovered. As for my plan, I've decided you're going to play the part of your own ghost. There must be plenty of old passage ways about the palace like the one we escaped through. We'll use them to make you appear and disappear. The ones you point to will die mysteriously in the night. As people keep dying rumors of your curse will spread. By the time the council and a few key members of the guard are all dead, the rest will all be scared out of their wits. That's when you give the chance to redeem themselves as you seize control. Those refusing to serve you or found to be plotting against you all die. We reveal all to the masses, and you will likely go down in history as the ghost king. Many will be convinced you came back from death to have your revenge and set things right."

Caelan smirked mischievously. "I think it's a really fun plan. What do you think king?"

[Kotorichan]

Hio listened quietly, his eyes growing wide as he imagined it. "That... Sounds incredible..." He murmured. "Do you really think we can do it? I mean... There are so many things that could go wrong." He didn't want to doubt Cael, he knew the other man was very capable. But what about himself? Hio had so little real world experience, and his life before all this still felt like some kind of half forgotten dream. Could he really hold himself together when facing the people who had tormented him for so long? What if he froze up at the essential moment?

[Silverwyn]

"Don't worry, we'll start small and build your confidence slowly. You won't even have to say anything for a while. We'll start with you appearing and disappearing briefly. Once you've gotten comfortable with that we can move on to you delivering your silent death sentence to the masterminds behind it all. I'll be beside you the entire time."

Caelan assured him.

"Now help me up. I think we could both use something to eat. When was the last time you ate?"

[Kotorichan]

"Ah... I'm not sure... I lost track of time when you were gone, I didn't really eat or sleep much at all." Hio admitted, rising to his feet and helping the other man up. "I felt like I was losing my mind a bit." He looked away, trying to hide his worry. "Perhaps I am not as stable as I was hoping. Being in this basement without any sign of day or night, or any human contact... I thought that there were strange people down here with me, trying to kill or drug me." His body shuddered in fear. "Why did I think that? Those drugs have worn off haven't they? Why would I keep hallucinating?"

[Silverwyn]

Caelan smiled reassuringly. "It's not really that unusual. It's a combination of paranoia and a side-effect of being on that drug for so long. When you're in a state of distress from worry or fear, you're imagination works hyper-actively with your mind, effectively tricking you into seeing things that aren't there. The kind of things that you fear." He patted the king's shoulder as he moved toward the kitchenette.

"It will go away with time. Especially as you begin to reestablish peace of mind."

[Kotorichan]

Hio trailed behind the man. "You really think so..?" He trailed off, lightly biting his lip. "I suppose that makes sense." He stood by Cael, watching him work. "Also... This may sound strange... But please tell me if I act childish..." He said after a moment of silence. "I am not sure if it is because of the drugs or if it is just my personality... But sometimes I feel as though I have no truly grown up. I do not want to appear childish when I retake the throne, I have done my best to suppress any child-like feelings that arise. But I fear that I may make a fool of myself."

[Silverwyn]

Caelan bit his lip and turned to give the man a considering look. It was certainly true that the man had yet to show the baring and attitude of a man at least 6 years older than him.

"Hio, you certainly don't have the maturity of a man your age, but you have plenty of time to develop it, and I'll see to it that you have every opportunity. So don't concern yourself with it. Put your faith in me and stop worrying over it."

[Kotorichan]

Hio felt his cheeks flush softly at the man's words. It seemed like all his problems were being solved just by Cael's presence. He felt his heart flutter, Cael really was his angel. A strange angel sure, but still an angel. Without thinking about it Hio walked up behind the man and wrapped his arms around the other's waist, leaning against his back. "...Thank you..." He said softly, his eyes closing as he enjoyed the presence of the other's body.

[Silverwyn]

The assassin tensed up reflexively at the other's presence at his back. It took a conscious effort of will to reflexively strike out in defense. Breathing, he slowly relaxed.

"You really shouldn't come up on me like that. I might hurt you on reflex." He admonished. "And you don't need to thank me. I'm doing this for me. Remember that. Your useless to me dead." He grumbled, setting aside a dish of food where the king could see it when he finally let go.

[Kotorichan]

Hio's cheeks flushed deeply as he realized what exactly he was doing and he quickly pulled away. "Ah, right... I'm sorry." He lightly brushed his hair back out of his face, his gaze dropping to the floor. "I think... Perhaps I have missed human contact more than I though." He admitted. "Especially after being down here alone." His voice softened slightly in sadness. "I know it isn't your goal to keep me happy, just alive. If I do something silly like that again then I would understand if you hit me."

[Silverwyn]

Caelan sighed. "It's not that. If you need a hug, then hug me, but come from the front. I'm a killer by nature. My reflex is to strike first if someone comes up behind me. The only reason you're not dead right now is because I already knew you were behind me, but it still took an effort of will to suppress my natural reflex. What do you think would have happened if you'd totally surprised me? Someone in my line of work can't afford to get into the habit of hesitating. Now there's your food, eat up."

[Kotorichan]

Hio looked at the man, lightly biting his lip. "Really..? It isn't strange that I want to hug you?" He took the bowl and sat down. "Thank you for the food." He let out a soft sigh before taking a small bite. His eyes closed in satisfaction. "Mm... Maybe it's because I haven't been eating. But this tastes really delicious." A slight smile played on his lips. "You're better than the palace chefs." It was attempt at a joke, but Hio's lack of socialization made it sound awkward.

[Silverwyn]

"It's hardly anything special." Caelan shrugged it off. "But of course anything is bound to taste better than even the best chef in the world's luke-warm food when you've been eating with drug dulled sense for the last 8 years."

He sat down with his own food with a small sigh.

"As for you hugging me. It's certainly not typical behavior for a man of your age and status and not something you should do in front of, or to, others. On the other hand, given what the last 8 years have done to you, I understand that right now it's a necessary comfort and confirmation for you. I feel it will help you get better so I certainly won't deny you."

[Kotorichan]

"Ah, of course." Hio's cheeks flushed softly at the man's words. "I know that it is not acceptable for my age or position..." He looked away, cheeks pink. "I... I keep wishing that I could just snuggle up to someone and cry until all the pain has gone away." He forced a smile up at the man. "Isn't it pathetic? My people have suffered so much worse than I have, yet I am still unable to put my own sadness into perspective. There are tens of millions of people whose only hope is an overgrown child such as myself."

[Silverwyn]

The assassin gave him a long measuring look. "Then do it. Curl up to me and cry. Cry for what you've been through and for what you've done. Cry until the pain is gone and you have no more tears. Cry so you can put it all behind you and focus on what needs to be done to fix it and avenge it all. Get it out of your system while you can, because you will not have the luxury for tears for a long time once we step put of this place. I was twelve years old when my father died. I was crying at his side as he took his last breath and his last words to me were: 'Cry with the resolve to be a man when you're done.' I cried all night. Squeezed out every childish tear I had, and by morning I was no longer a boy. Since learning to walk, I'd never cried before that, and I haven't cried since."

[Kotorichan]

Hio stared at the man. "What if just once isn't enough?" He asked softly. "What if every night I want to hold onto you and cry for a few minutes?" His gaze dropped to his food again. "What then?" He felt so weak, so pathetic. There was no way that other kings were this weak. Even when they first took the throne they must be stronger than this.

 

If only Hio had worked harder when his father was alive, if only he had applied himself to his studies and training. Maybe then he would be more capable now.

[Silverwyn]

Caelan's violet eyes pierced the king. "Is that the strength of your resolve? Is it so weak that you can't make once enough?" Standing up, he set his bowl aside and began to circle the king, studying him from all angles.

"Shall I tell you a secret?" He mused, coming to a stop in front of him.

Reaching out, he ran a finger along the side of Hio's face as he leaned in to whisper as though it really were a secret.

"We each have the power to choose how strong we'll be." He stared into the man's eyes for a moment then turned away.

"When my father died. I could have cried for days, wallowing in how alone and helpless I was. Instead I chose to listen to my fathers words and as I cried I held onto my resolve that it would be the last time I cried."

Frowning he turned back to him.

"So what kind of man are you going to be? Are you going to be weak and cry every night, always depending on me and having no real control over what I do? Or are you going to resolve to cry your fill tonight and start growing up tomorrow so that one day you can stand on your own two feet as a strong king your father could have been proud of, with a firm hand on me as the dagger at your side?"

[Kotorichan]

Hio shivered at the feeling of the man's finger running along his skin. "I..." He clenched his hands into fists in his lap. "I'm going to put everything I have into being strong." Even as he spoke his body trembled. "If I can't be strong enough to help my country then I have no reason to live, or to have ever lived."

 

"But that doesn't mean it'll be enough. I-I tried so hard-" He looked up at Cael, his eyes filling with tears. "I-I tried so hard to fight against those drugs. B-but it didn't make a difference. I-it never made a difference. So- So how do you know that I can do this? I've already failed my people once..."

[Silverwyn]

Caelan sighed. "You don't have to fight the drugs anymore Hio. They're gone. Not being able to fight off the drugs doesn't mean you are weak. It means you were weak. But that's the nature of drugs. They make people slaves. Unable to break their own shackles. And you are not shackled anymore. You're just simply used to being weak and helpless."

Taking the king's dish, he set it aside and guided the man to the bed. Once they were both lying down, he wrapped his arms around him and held him close.

"All you need to do is find your resolve and hold onto it. Stop second guessing yourself. If you believe you are strong, you will be strong. But how can you see it if you keep doubting that you are?"

[Kotorichan]

Hio let out a shaky sob and leaned into the man's chest. "I-I don't want to disappoint you..." He whimpered softly. "It s-seems like you a-actually believe in me..." He wrapped his arms around Cael, clinging to him. He began to sob weakly. The king began to sound like a small child, one that had just been beaten. He sounded broken, it was hard to imagine this person helping anyone, let alone an entire country.

 

He continued to cry, whimpering out his fears inaudibly. Eventually his crying began to grow quieter as he exhausted himself.

[Silverwyn]

"I rather you try and fail than not try at all."

Caelan murmured and said no more. There was nothing more to say. The man would either take his words to heart and make an effort, or he'd continue to be the way he was and Caelan could only hope time and experience would eventually bring maturity and self confidence.

He eventually fell asleep as the king quieted down.

 

When morning came, he eased his way off the bed, doing his best not to wake Hio.

Once he was free of the bed he started tidying up and inventorying what they had. His wound was still tender and he had to mindful of it, but he'd never been one to be able to sit and do nothing even while healing.

[Kotorichan]

Hio slowly awoke in the late morning. His eyes hurt like hell from crying so much and he felt dehydrated. He closed his eyes for a moment, taking a deep breath. Finally he slipped out of bed and walked over to Cael. "Um... Good morning." He had no idea if it really was morning, but it felt like the proper thing to see.

"What can I do to help?" He clenched his hands into fists. "I cried a lot yesterday, so now I have to be strong... And I feel that I should start doing something, otherwise I'll continue to feel useless. Even if it's nothing of importance, please tell me what I can do." He lightly rested his hand on his chest, forcing a nervous smile. "Even the most well crafted knife is useless in an untrained hand... And even the most skilled puppet-master cannot use a broken puppet. So no matter what my place is in this, I have to do something... Right?"

[Silverwyn]

Caelan considered him for a moment, and then smiled.

"You can help me get some water. We could both use a bath and I can't carry much weight right now. It will be faster if we're both drawing water."

 

He grabbed two buckets, handing one to Hio.

"Wait here for a moment while I make sure everything is clear."

 

After ensuring that no one was waiting for them outside, he indicated for Hio to come up and moved out of the way.

Once the king had joined him outside, he lead him to the well and explained how to use it.

"You'll have to pull them all up. It pulls too much on my wound." he explained. Not that it would have ordinarily kept him from doing it anyway. But he recognized the logic of keeping Hio busy and feeling useful. And they did say hard work builds character.

,

Once they had two buckets of water, he lead him back down to show him the large tub they needed to dump the water in.

"Now while you draw the next bucket, I'll get a fire going so we can heat some of the water to make it more tolerable."

 

Ordinarily, in full health, Caelan would have been carrying two buckets of water at a time himself. But he knew that the king's muscles were weak and barely used. He had trouble enough carrying one full bucket, two just wasn't a possibility... for now. Drawing and carrying buckets of water was an excellent start to building those muscles back up. Hio would probably be carrying two at a time before long if Caelan made this a daily ritual.