Jump to content

Just my first short poem X"<


JuJu
 Share

Recommended Posts

It's the first time I make a poem...

 

I'm not good at this but...

 

I feel so sad now and I don't know what to do..

 

I tried to write them down and hope me will feel better...:)

 

Hope you guys won't laugh at me brokenheart.gif

 

 

I suddenly cry…in the middle of night

I thought a good sleep …could wipe everything

I tried to sing…to forget all the sorrow…

But it’s useless … the pain gnawing my heart…

Do you know…I feel like getting sick…

Of what you did..what you acted and said…

 

I wanna escape from this scary feelings

I’m sinking in the despair of love…

Could you tell or show me just one time??

Cause I can’t find “me” in your eyes…

..

I’m standing by yourside at this moment…

Now I really know what I’m scared the most

It’s being with you but your heart is far….

 

lol it's so short but I really don't know what to write more...ali_002.gif

  • Like 18
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Replies 17
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

  • JuJu

    4

  • K

    2

  • Amander123

    2

  • animegirl

    1

Top Posters In This Topic

Great poem!!!!!! Even if it's your first it is very good!!!!! I love it a looooooooot!!!!!!!! :leaf15:

 

However, I'm sad to know that you feel so bad! The person who broke your hart doesn't deserve you if he or she treats you bad!

Of course nobody will laugh! :D

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

ali_097.gif

 

Thanks Nena-chan.... They warm my heart a lot...Thanks...!!

 

Yeah...Sometimes ppl are so selfish and even don't wana care about other's feelings :) They hurt smb then go and don't even look back to see if the other's crying or not...

 

Hope you won't never meet someone like that...:D

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Your poem is so beautiful! I like it a lot! leaf4

Like Nena said above, I'm just sad to know you feel so bad...

But try to cheer up! I'd like to read happy poems from you as well! foxy2

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I love the poem a lot! :leaf3:

I can understand how you feel, cause I also cried many nights when I was hurt by my ex boyfriend! Try to forget and cheer up! Time mends everything! :D

Hope that after writing it, you felt better! rabbit14

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I love your poem! It is very touchy! I think we are the most inspired and creative when we are hurt and when we love... :banhbao45:

Hope you'll get over it and feel better again! :leaf12:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Omg I love it Ichii_kun!!! It was really good! That was your first poem? It seems like you always knew how to write poems :) It was so beautiful

 

I'm sorry that you are feeling that way though :(

I hope you feel better foxy3

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

 

I tried to sing…to forget all the sorrow…

But it’s useless … the pain gnawing my heart…

 

I wanna escape from this scary feelings

I’m sinking in the despair of love…

Cause I can’t find “me” in your eyes…

 

Now I really know what I’m scared the most

It’s being with you but your heart is far….

 

 

 

. .these were the lines that really touched my heart,

 

. .it tells me these: a heart felt breaking, fell pieces that rebuilding but couldn't, struggling from the depth of sorrow but still sinking...

 

. .your first poem expresses too much sadness (your being down helped you to come up with this) :)

 

POEM are poet's hidden emotions rabbit14

 

 

. .warm hugs for you ichii-kun foxy3 (hope it could comfort you :) )

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

This is really moving, sad and makes me want to hug you and never let go. So many great lines though. I love the part "I'm sinking in the despair of love" and "Cause I can't find 'me' in your eyes" I hope you write more but not from having to experience it. T__T

  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

lool...

 

all you guys made me feel sooo touchy from the bottom of my heart....ali_072.gif

 

I has received so many sweet praises, many warm consolations and hugs....

 

How could I say now??

 

I love you all....ali_116.gif

I will try to live well and forget all the bad things .......ali_048.gif

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I am glad to hear that ichii_kun :D

 

We all love you too!foxy2

 

And you should definitely try to write more! You are so good :hamtaro-005 (6):

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I love your poem so much!!! It is so touchy and romantic! :Red_fox7:

 

We all love you too Ichii_kun

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

. .that's a good way of thinking ichii-kun rabbit14

 

. .be optimistic :D

 

. .besides, as amander-sama and animegirl said, WE ALL REALLY LOVE YOU! foxy2

 

. .(don't you remember from my poem???, " i could all be your RICE", hahaha) rabbit16

 

. .lol :leaf5:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Your poem is really romantic and sad! But I think it is very well-written.

 

I couldn't say that this is your first poem. Hope you'll write more!

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

5.gif

 

lol...I don't know what to say...

 

How much love I received from all of you..I will keep them in my heart...16.gif

 

lol...I can be proud of that "i am loved by many people looool..."4.gif

 

Thanks you guy one more time

@cloudy-chan: Food Love poem, right :D...I still remember of course...I'm happy to hear " " You could all be my RICE" lol...11.gif

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I liked your poem a lot! It is very good! Nobody would say you've never written poetry before :D

I hope you forgot the sadness and you are feeling great and happy again :hamtaro-005 (6):

I hope you will write more when you are happy as well :hamtaro-005 (8):

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I suddenly cry…in the middle of night

I thought a good sleep …could wipe everything

I tried to sing…to forget all the sorrow…

But it’s useless … the pain gnawing my heart…

Do you know…I feel like getting sick…

Of what you did..what you acted and said…

 

I wanna escape from this scary feelings

I’m sinking in the despair of love…

Could you tell or show me just one time??

Cause I can’t find “me” in your eyes…

..

I’m standing by yourside at this moment…

Now I really know what I’m scared the most

It’s being with you but your heart is far….

 

awww!!! i experienced this kind is situation before! :leaf9: all of sudden cried in the middle of night, thinkin' of someone who does not love you although you have a feelin' for that person. huhh...... it took me a few weeks to recover.

 

--> and this poem is so touching!! i love it so much!! hope to get more from you!! cheers and be strong!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
 Share




×
×
  • Create New...

YaoiOtaku is a friendly community that has a lot to offer when it comes to everything yaoi - manga series, DJs, oneshots, anime, yaoi RPs and plenty of BL discussion topics.

Make sure to also check:

Yaoi Manga

KPop Profiles

Yaoi Dj

Manga Lotus