A confession booth :D

[nitemare]

I have to confess (

I think i fell in love with a guy, i really like him :/

But he just took it as a fun thing...

I dont know i wasnt planning to fall in love you know so since i didnt expect it im more confused than heartbroken i think. I dont know its equal to forgettinf what you forgot so you dont know what to feel, anger or sadness or loss. Since you dont know how much the thing you lost mattered . *siigh

[{yaoi-loveh..}~]

though i have a girlfriend .. today in my graduation i've been crushed in a group of girls, i mean LOTS and LOTS of girls who were crushing against my "things", and then i kept .. having wierd "ehm .. ehm" ideas ... about it, and .. a one of 'em was my friend .. a freind who has a crush on me and she was right infront of me ... facing me .. and i was really horny and .. she's really cute, and the space between our faces was 1 cm .. and when i was like, in the bathroom fixing my hair and stuff, she was there and we ... made out .. and i cheated on my girlfriend ... for the fourth time .. this month, though i really REALLY love my gf .. but i can't help it, she's away visiting a freind on the other side of the world .. and i'm a nasty person who can't control herself ...

[cherryyuri]

this thread is really an interesting one to read! :hamtaro-005 (6):

 

so... let's get to the point here.. i'm a girl and i'm straight, but i confess that i have this curiosity of making out with a girl.. just to know how it is. no feelings. just sex.

 

i guess i can say im a usual girl next door. i dont drink, i try my best to not say bad words and stuff like that, and usually people would not believe some things i've done (or wish to do) just by looking at me. i'm like.. the good girl, good daughter. i'm not a party party person, i still live with my family, i dont get home too late, etc. and dont get me wrong, i dont do it just for appearence, i am like that and i like to be the way i am. but i do have lots of sex desires and i don't disguise it. i just dont think i have to show it to everybody. this is just between me and my partner, no one else.

 

so.. confessions... when i was like.. 6 i had this boy friend (about same age) who we alwaayyss used to play as husband and wife. we kissed a lot back then. of course i still had no idea of what exactly i was doing, but i liked. later, around 10, i had this friend (girl) and we always used to kiss too. we always played like.. practicing for whenever we would get a boyfriend.. we kissed a lot! and i guess my first tongue kiss was with her.... =]

 

when i actually got my first real boyfriend, my parents never allowed us to spend the night together or anything like that. he have never even seen my bedroom! We were always at the living room watching tv or at the porch.. so any chance we had, we had to do it quickly and quietly. our favorite thing to do was to sit next to each other and i used to put a pilow on my lap and he used to touch me under that and i did that to him too. so we had cum a LOT of times at the couch, while my parents were at the other room, whitout even being suspicious about anything. and a lot of times we actually had sex at the porch.

 

i love the idea of doing it while everybody else is minding their own business, in places that you might get caught.and still being honest... i usually satisfy myself at the bathroom office while everybody is working... =]

[misakixusagi]

this is quite a good post to read and to write actually lol

 

umm i wouldnt know where to start lol- like a lot of u i used to make out with my cousin(girl) at her place when i was younger and then with a friend(girl) when we were like 11 and another girl when i was prob bout 13.

im really shy and push people away alot so the first time i kissed a guy was when i was 19 and i met him in a random chatroom then said 'lets meet' but was only once as i got afraid n ignored him ! .. only been on a couple of dates with a friend since then but nothing came of it, again i pushed him away

 

and only 2 people know this who i talk to online that i self harm, i have fazes where ill do it then nothing for months, depends on moods, i have a small craft knife i keep with me incase but anything works . only got 1 small visable scar to me, but dnt think any1 eles notices it on the top of my wrist. im careful to not make them 2 visable...although its sumtimes hard..n i do quite like pain lol

 

phew that was hard !

[cherryyuri]

its funny how a lot of us have had experiences with friends while kids, uh? =]

 

and i used to push people away too. but little by little ive learn to face the fear and let people get closer to me. its not easy, but its not impossible!

[yojichan]

I'm almost 24 and I've never had a boyfriend or even a serious relationship. I'm too scared to like anyone because of the way my crushes treated me after telling them I liked them.

 

don't worry so much about it. i know it's cliche but when you find the that person, you know it's gonna be the right one for you 'cause you will feel right with the world around you. trust your instincts. don't pay too much attention to what society dictates. it's your life, not theirs. you call the shots.

 

i've had lots of experience with unrequited love and it sucks a lot. but i learned to deal with it by being friends with that person. my attitude towards this situation is ~ even if you are not in love with me and you prefer someone else, when we hang out, you're gonna see ME. you will talk to ME. you're spending time with ME. and after hanging out together or whatever, you can go to whoever that person you like. but in my time, you pay attention to ME. i also flirt so yeah...i get my kicks like that. but STILL unrequited love sucks. i'm glad i got out of it. so don't worry, it's all about attitude. don't give up just because some people didn't treat you right.

 

this is quite a good post to read and to write actually lol

 

umm i wouldnt know where to start lol- like a lot of u i used to make out with my cousin(girl) at her place when i was younger and then with a friend(girl) when we were like 11 and another girl when i was prob bout 13.

im really shy and push people away alot so the first time i kissed a guy was when i was 19 and i met him in a random chatroom then said 'lets meet' but was only once as i got afraid n ignored him ! .. only been on a couple of dates with a friend since then but nothing came of it, again i pushed him away

 

and only 2 people know this who i talk to online that i self harm, i have fazes where ill do it then nothing for months, depends on moods, i have a small craft knife i keep with me incase but anything works . only got 1 small visable scar to me, but dnt think any1 eles notices it on the top of my wrist. im careful to not make them 2 visable...although its sumtimes hard..n i do quite like pain lol

 

phew that was hard !

 

i'm glad you shared this with us. it really is hard. self-inflicted pain is a serious thing. i hope in your situation it does not escalate. i can relate with you on this as i tend to hurt myself when a situation gets way too intense for me to handle. i cut, even bash my own head on the wall and even try to drown myself in the bathroom...it really helps to be able to find a much safer outlet. for me it has been writing. writing is like therapy for me.

 

its funny how a lot of us have had experiences with friends while kids, uh? =]

 

and i used to push people away too. but little by little ive learn to face the fear and let people get closer to me. its not easy, but its not impossible!

 

yeah a lot of those experiences really do go way back in childhood.

like you, i used to push people away a lot. i was fiercely on guard at all times. so afraid to get hurt and taken advantaged of.

but i'm also drawn to people who are very expressive of their feelings and with them i learned to let go of myself little by little.

it does help a lot and gave me a refreshing insight with regards to relationships.

[鼠ドル]

Confession...

Well, this is purely for those who haven't met me I guess... Well, or don't really know me.

I used to be quite fucked up when I have had a long term of severe depression and most people would probably think I was insane if I told them all the crazy ass thoughts I used to have. But, it's in the past. The only thing that reminds me of it is the small bouts I have at times, the meds I take and my tones of scars.

A thing to confess? I fell in love with my old best friend. He never knew.

[cherryyuri]

don't worry so much about it. i know it's cliche but when you find the that person, you know it's gonna be the right one for you 'cause you will feel right with the world around you. trust your instincts. don't pay too much attention to what society dictates. it's your life, not theirs. you call the shots.

 

completely agreed. people always want to push us to do something. thanks to that there is a lot of messed up people around. i have lots of friends who just regreted most of their "love" life because they just did whatever other people push them to do.

 

i cut, even bash my own head on the wall and even try to drown myself in the bathroom...it really helps to be able to find a much safer outlet. for me it has been writing. writing is like therapy for me.

you're *forbidden* to drown yourself, mr yoji! do you hear me??? hehe..

i'm glad that writing is a therapy for you... thanks to that we have lots of good stuff to read! yay!

 

 

yeah a lot of those experiences really do go way back in childhood.

like you, i used to push people away a lot. i was fiercely on guard at all times. so afraid to get hurt and taken advantaged of.

but i'm also drawn to people who are very expressive of their feelings and with them i learned to let go of myself little by little.

it does help a lot and gave me a refreshing insight with regards to relationships.

i was like that mostly because i was too insecure and, because of that, i had lots of problems, all of them got misunderstood by everyone around me. so people were just... *always* being mean to me. so, whenever someone was being nice.. i run away, affraid that it would be just another game. so i was always affraid of being hurt. but i finally started to trust myself a little more and open up and give a chance to the nice people around. it wasnt easy, but, as i said, it is possible.

[cherryyuri]

Confession...

Well, this is purely for those who haven't met me I guess... Well, or don't really know me.

I used to be quite fucked up when I have had a long term of severe depression and most people would probably think I was insane if I told them all the crazy ass thoughts I used to have. But, it's in the past. The only thing that reminds me of it is the small bouts I have at times, the meds I take and my tones of scars.

A thing to confess? I fell in love with my old best friend. He never knew.

 

i'm glad things are better for you, now! depression is something really, really bad. i've had it. we should always be aware so it would not come back. life is *so* much better without it!

 

i also had a best friend who i fell in love and he never knew! ohh i wish i were brave to tell him back then...

[鼠ドル]

i'm glad things are better for you, now! depression is something really, really bad. i've had it. we should always be aware so it would not come back. life is *so* much better without it!

 

i also had a best friend who i fell in love and he never knew! ohh i wish i were brave to tell him back then...

Yeah, it took alot of fighting (YEARS) but I'm finally on the other side of it.

 

It's hard to confess something like that though, since it's your BEST friend and you just don't want to ruin the friendship. Well, crushes pass~

[cherryyuri]

Yeah, it took alot of fighting (YEARS) but I'm finally on the other side of it.

 

It's hard to confess something like that though, since it's your BEST friend and you just don't want to ruin the friendship. Well, crushes pass~

 

 

i know what you mean!!! what do you think about him? how does he act around you? do you think that he might feel something or maybe what do you think it would be his reaction?

[鼠ドル]

i know what you mean!!! what do you think about him? how does he act around you? do you think that he might feel something or maybe what do you think it would be his reaction?

I guess he's not really my best friend anymore, we kinda drifted apart. And he has a girlfriend

[cherryyuri]

I guess he's not really my best friend anymore' date=' we kinda drifted apart. And he has a girlfriend[/quote']

 

if he's not your best friend anymore... doesn't it makes it easier? hehe

but a girlfriend... yeah... it makes a little bit difficult for him to say "yes" to you, if he feels the same...

 

why does this stuff has to be so hard??

[rotten boy]

:I sleep with my bothers ex boyfreind and my best freind.:leaf9 I am so bad.

[Ginger]

I slept with my "practical" instructor in college. He taught us hands on stuff in a real world setting. he made a pass and I accepted. I wish that I had had better sense than that but it was a long time ago so... What a dope I was LOL

When I think of it now I cringe and feel embarrassed. At the time it seemed kinda romantic - Wahhhh so embarrassing.

[BRIDGET]

I had a broyfriend for 4 years. When my dad died I got very depressed & he didn't supported me very much, we had a big fight and went with my friends for some drinks. I woke up bare naked with an unknown guy. I started crying and he was really kind tto me ( one of my best friends right now) I never told my boy till the day he broke up with me bec he was leaving town to get into the army.

I've watched my first gay porn vid this year

[PinkNailsOfDeath]

When I was in the 3rd grade I had a new classmate (a girl): Elena..

She was so little and cute, but kinda shy. 2 days past but no one was talking to her. So I decided to go and have a talk. I wanted to give her a "welcome hug". foxy3

I walked slowly behind her so she couldn't hear me..When I was going to give her a hug she turned so fast and... our lips touched just like a kiss :cuteonion37:

we both were shocked.. the other classmates that saw us were shocked too onion7

she hadn't talked to me for 2 weeks back then...but her anger past in time.. now we are best frineds onion0 Elena and I are bi now :leaf5:

the truth: I kinda liked that kiss :3onion15:

[chiakaiyuki]

I used to be deperessed, and I would self-harm, not speak to anyone for days, not eat...

I guess it came fom having to look after my mother from the age of 10. Living with a psychotic person makes you a bit crazy as well I have many scars all over my body...

Because I would not speak to people, I lost many friends. I lost trust in eveyone, and so have never had a boyfriend or any close friends since then. (exept one ^^)

The power of Japan (music mainly, but also Yaoi) has cured me of my depression, but not my shyness towards other people in real life.

 

Also, I'm not sure, but I'm probably Bi Gender doesn't really matter to me I guess, pretty is pretty

[rerenana]

I'm almost 24 and I've never had a boyfriend or even a serious relationship. I'm too scared to like anyone because of the way my crushes treated me after telling them I liked them.

 

well me too, i'm 20 but never had a boyfriend or a serious relationship. But it because it really--really embarrassing if other people knows my feeling. And i dont know why, i always avoid people who wants approach me.

 

 

about confession? hmm--- not really confesion, but i remember something hillarious back then. when i was 10. I've accidentally kiss my classmates (boy). my classmates joked and told me 'hey, if you kiss someone you're going to get pregnant'. stupid meh, i REALLY believe that (mostly at that time, i always believe of everything easily). so i keep overthinking about that until i forgot about it.. (easily fooled, younger me =,='' )

[EmiZea]

For some reason I'm not surprised by so many have felt the cold hands of depression, sad indeed, but it might be cause of my own dark mind, that it doesn't surprise me.. cause ..

 

Well I have suffered from depression most of my life, just didn't know. Today I have the diagnose "Chronic depression" attached to my forehead, since no medication helps me, cause I have been taking to many drugs.. and have a bunch of other diagnoses too, but easier to just give one diagnose "Fucked up". Even that most people don't believe that I am sick, since I always smile and laugh a lot and love to have fun. But I'm pretty twisted in my head and got papers on it, since I have been hospitalised 3 times in mental hospitals, but it saved my life and made me understand why my life had been so fucked up. It helped me to get on with my life and understand why I was so self destructive.

 

I felt so good for almost 4 years after my last mental hospital "visit", but I have to admit it have been going the wrong direction for a bit to long now. That is why I haven't really been in here on the board for a few months. I got tempted by the evil drug demon inside me, so been taking drugs again. Will not bore you with the whole story, let just say 4 weeks ago I ODed for the 2. time in my life. But apparently I must have someone watching over me, cause I'm still here. I don't remember anything from when I collapsed and to when I wake up in the hospital, with a "guard" by my side. Since I had cut myself with a razor and my cloth was all bloody, they assumed that I was suicidal and I was not allowed to be alone. So when I was stable, I was sent to my other home.. yep the mental hospital, what a nightmare to come back, but they accepted that I didn't want to get hospitalised again.

 

I promised my best friend that I would get help, he was by my side for (I think it was) 10 hours at the hospital. I went to him cause I felt like giving up, he went to get me some water and came back to find me collapsed with almost no pulse.. to see how this has affected him, I accepted to get help.

 

I have contacted several places and talked with my own doctor, but the only place to offer me, is not the right one for me. Its for the heavy users (Heroin and that is not me). So still not getting help other then from my own doctor... soooo of cause it went wrong and I was out last Friday night and before I knew of it, I find myself taking lines on the toilets again.

 

I feel ashamed and like a failure, and I keep asking what the hell was I thinking about? Just got my life saved 4 weeks ago, and now I'm doing it again.. But the only answer there is, is that I am an addict. I know that I am and I need to stay away from those people, I even deleted all contacts and got a new number, but still I end up going to the bar/disco where they all are.

 

But I need to stop this.. and I want to stop this.. Just need to fight the addict demon inside me and get over my abstinence...

 

That's enough confession from me for tonight

[cherryyuri]

@emizea i can only imagine how hard it must be! but must people say that recognize the addiction as the hardest part of the recovery. so.. keep holding on! nobody say it's easy, but they say it's possible! i have never been a drug addict but if you need anything, feel free to ask help! =]

[EmiZea]

@cherryyuri, Thank you!

Aye admitting the addiction to myself and accepting that I am an addict, that is one of the hardest parts, but since I have been an addict before, it was easy to see it this time.. but then again, 1 time a drug addict, always a drug addict. Addiction is never easy to get out of, no matter what it is, but I will get out of it again, cause I want to live and get back to a "normal" life again. I manage to get out of it before, so I will get out of it again.. there is no other way

 

Since so few people in my life knows this side of me, its a huge secret to keep for myself, so just felt like confessing and to tell someone. I'm really not good at asking for help, but I appreciate the offer, so thank you *Hugs*

[wince]

confession? Okay. I'm gay. Gladly, I'm not ashamed of it because it's normal for me. I've got a huge crush over a girl named Airin. We were pretty close for a year and after that we never talked much. I left people around me with their own thoughts about me, since I've never dated anyone and I don't feel like doing it. I wish someday I could tell Airin how I feel and I wish I could live my life , being me like this forever. And then.. I wish everyone would understand about me being gay and support me ^^

[shirotsuki]

I'm almost 24 and I've never had a boyfriend or even a serious relationship.

I'm 18 and never had a boyfriend or a serious relaiionship. That must be because i've never liked anyone! beside my crushes on korean/japanese artists; that don't count as love i've never been in love... So, i'v no idea whether i'm gay, bi or straigh.

 

So, one of my secrets is: I don't believe in love or what so ever. (At least for me) sad but true!

[shirotsuki]

oh! wince, don't worry because here in the foru everyone understands you! you can be at ease! gambatte