How did you found out that you are gay and how did you feel about it ?

[cherryyuri]

yeah. i agree abt the feeling of first love.. of it being "saint" to you.

 

so how's life for you now sniegas? are tings better? are you oppen abt your sexuality or you still keep it for yourself?

[sniegas]

I've told about that only tomy mom and to some friends. I'm not embarassed I guess but... you know how it is - If all my relatives know this - my parents could be abused or laughed at... That's how it is in our country... You may be pushed away, isolated or even laughed at and beaten up badly... We are all in the closet I guess - all gay community in Lithuania... we have held the first Gay Pride padare these years but it was a huge scandal... and... I don't know... even when I go to my church - I don't feel accepted because of all the preachers with the words of rejection for us - homosexuals... And personally I have a girl I love but not everything is going smoothly between us... somehow I'm feeling rather depressed. Maybe someday I'll creat my life with love and content. I don't know. maybe not. I'm a charming person after all (and it isn't important if you are gay or not - you must have some charms to find the person to stay with you)

[nicicia]

I'm a girl, I'm heteroflexible, and I'm completely fine with that. I love boys A LOT, lol, and only had crushes on boys. Now and again I see a girl I think is really hot, and I think if I had the oppertunity, I'd totally go gay for her, but it's a purely sexual level, I don't get romantic feelings for girls. I only get weak in the knees, blush, stutter, and get all tingly when a hot guy talk to me and touch me. I know I will only fall in love with a guy

 

I think a lot of people are heteroflexible, they just don't know it. They know they are straight, but sometimes they want to kiss and have new sexual experiences with a member of the same sex, and they start to wonder why. Well, then it's very likely they're heteroflexible. XP

[shirotsuki]

I love this thread!! it is important to talk about those thigns. mainly because many people won't say anything otherwise... and it is bad to keep something so important to our selves alone... toomuch of a burden...

 

I wish i knew clearly the answer... i'm not sure whether i'm straight or bi! well... i've never been in love and i've never liked anyone so... i don't know! i might fall for a girl or a guy in the future... i have no idea...

BUt i must say i tend more to guys... xD every "crush" on famous people, or anime/manga characters or whatever has always been guys so... yeah! i am a girl by the way! And i do think guys can be extremely beautiful... such a presence... on the other hand, girls can be extremely delicate... don't know! xD

 

And finally like many said i believe we like the people for who they are! not for what gender they are! you are looking for their beauty, for their personality, spirit! not looking at gender!! in my opinion of course...

[nicicia]

Shiro, that is a very good point. Personality is of course, the most important when you consider spending your life with someone.

 

I don't even usually like to be friends with girls. Don't get me wrong, I have a few friends who are girls, and my closest friend is a girl, but I generally think boys are much more fun and easier to talk to. I think I'd most likely fall for a bi boy who also likes yaoi, and have a very playful spirit. Main problem I have with girls is I think a lot of them are too serious all the time XD And because I'm a girl myself, I need someone who can drag me out of my serious mood and make relax and have fun.

[mixlol]

I am homo... I wont say how it happins.. " it doesn't matter anyways"

but when I were sure about my feeling for girls. I was around 10, I liked my best friend.. I was so in deep love with her "still now".

but in the place I live in it's imposble to annonce that u r homo, u would be so humilated, bulled, and not just u.. your wholl familly

it's so crul about this matter in here.. anyways, I've never told anyone about it befor..to be honest, it feels straing to say I'm homo. but I guess it's alright here,every one is understanding n nice people..

[shirotsuki]

Shiro, that is a very good point. Personality is of course, the most important when you consider spending your life with someone.

 

I don't even usually like to be friends with girls. Don't get me wrong, I have a few friends who are girls, and my closest friend is a girl, but I generally think boys are much more fun and easier to talk to. I think I'd most likely fall for a bi boy who also likes yaoi, and have a very playful spirit. Main problem I have with girls is I think a lot of them are too serious all the time XD And because I'm a girl myself, I need someone who can drag me out of my serious mood and make relax and have fun.

 

i'm the same actually... i have more guy friends than girls... and i agree that guys are more easy to talk to! and most important... girls can be really vindictive and mean! Guys...not that much!

And i also love to have fun! the most important thing is to make me laugh! i gues... xD i'm not serious at all! but i still neeed someone as outgoing as me by my side...

 

And isn't it all yaoi fangirls (at least straight or bi) dream to have a guy that also is into it? i mean... That would be awesome!! ^^

 

I am homo... I wont say how it happins.. " it doesn't matter anyways"

but when I were sure about my feeling for girls. I was around 10, I liked my best friend.. I was so in deep love with her "still now".

but in the place I live in it's imposble to annonce that u r homo, u would be so humilated, bulled, and not just u.. your wholl familly

it's so crul about this matter in here.. anyways, I've never told anyone about it befor..to be honest, it feels straing to say I'm homo. but I guess it's alright here,every one is understanding n nice people..

 

That is why i think this thread is important! you can just tell about it freely because noone will trash you or make fun of you! we are all here to support eachother ok mixie? Gambatte!

[cherryyuri]

I've told about that only tomy mom and to some friends. I'm not embarassed I guess but... you know how it is - If all my relatives know this - my parents could be abused or laughed at... That's how it is in our country... You may be pushed away, isolated or even laughed at and beaten up badly... We are all in the closet I guess - all gay community in Lithuania... we have held the first Gay Pride padare these years but it was a huge scandal... and... I don't know... even when I go to my church - I don't feel accepted because of all the preachers with the words of rejection for us - homosexuals... And personally I have a girl I love but not everything is going smoothly between us... somehow I'm feeling rather depressed. Maybe someday I'll creat my life with love and content. I don't know. maybe not. I'm a charming person after all (and it isn't important if you are gay or not - you must have some charms to find the person to stay with you)

 

i understand it dear. i have an idea of how hard it might be =[

im so sorry for that. i always had a really hard time to understand why gay people are so not accepted. i never felt that being gay is wrong. EVER. maybe i was gay in a past life. hahaha. but i always felt okay about it. i never fet that uncomfortable thing most people say they feel around gay people or whatever. and i always had such gay friends.

and yes.. i always feel sad for them when i go to church and people start to preach of how wrong it is... good luck on your relationship dear! i hope everything work out!

 

 

@nicicia

 

i'm so like that! haha. sometie si look a girl and think "oh, shes hot!" and i think about hot stuff to do.. haha. but that's all. as soon as i see a hot guy, i forget abt the girl. hahaha

[Jin.]

I'm a girl, and bisexual or a sexual (I don't care what gender my love will be as long i'm happy and the other looks nice. and A sexual because, WHY AM I A GIRL!? IF I WAS A BOY... THEN I WOULD... feel the yaoi sensation, but because i'm a girl, i'm not really in the sexuality... yuri or hentai...)

My dad might maybe know that i am bisexual. I do not know, but my mom doesn't know, I think they both think i am a gay-freak and asexual.

But my mom is like: "eew" about bisexual girls, lesbian. but she agrees with me if their happy then its alright...

Since i confessed once on school in a SOS(It was something about gaylove and lesbians) that I am bisexual, aslong i am happy.

But after that loads of people asked if i'm bisexual -_- or lesbian, they compare bisexual with lesbian. :/ that I like loads of girls immediately, and yeah you get bullied for a time.

And i think I am kinda having a crush on my best friend... Who is also bisexual but i'm not really... wanting to destroy the friendship so.

 

But if you're feeling something for a guy, then it's alright, right? Aslong you are feeling happy ^_^

[FreeUke]

I'm female and gay.

It was kind of weird how i found out. I had this friend and whenever she'd smile or look at me a certain way, I blushed like mad and felt a funny feeling in my stomach. After a small amount of time we started getting closer. For example: she'd put her arm around my waist and hold me close to her side, I'd lean my head on her shoulder, she'd pull me onto her lap, those things. and after a couple weeks, my sister said that it was about time we should go out. So i asked her and she said yes. Though it didn't work out in the end, but if it wasnt for her i would be with my beautiful girlfriend now.

And now, i dont see anything at all in guys. Only friendship or brotherly love. thats all. I cant see myself going out with a guy.

My parents and family know. Their all cool with it. Well, everyone except my dad. He's in total denyl. but it doesnt bother me. And something i love about my mum, is that she said she doesn't really care about who i'm with, as long as im happy.

 

Love and let love.

[jamieboy]

I am actually bi, because I like and think about girls sometimes. But in life I guess you would say I'm more gay because I have only ever done things with guys. It started when I was in 6th grade something happened that I didnt expect to happen but when it did I liked it and haha kept doing it. But also from when I was younger I have had thoughts about what if I was a girl and sometimes wish I had been a girl. Sometimes when guys are talking about how cute or hot a girl is I get jealous and wish they were saying that about me. Plus I would LOVE to dress as a girl sometimes. I have done it but not a lot. This is a difficult thing that I dont talk to a lot of people about because I just dont think people understand it.

 

And nobody in my family or my real life knows those things about me. My mom is like REALLY against gays so I will keep the secret for now anyway. But it's hard because I don't feel like I can be myself. But that's one reason I love YO so much... : you totally let me be who I am!!

 

You people are the greatest !!!!!! *kisses the whole YaoiOtaku membership*

[jamieboy]

oh btw I am glad I like boys and I LOVE yaoi!!

How I felt when I found out I was gay is hard to say in the public forum so if you want to know ask me in private or whatever.

[Kisaru]

I'm...pansexual. And I've tried telling my mother before, but lordy did she ever deny it. Something about her never getting grandkids if I was a lesbian. And my extended family is INSANELY homophobic. -Hangs head at the stupidity of living in the bible belt nation-

 

I couldn't care less, honestly, who I'm with. I care about the person, not the body. I've dated men, women, even transgender people before. Personality and trust is the main thing I look for in a partner. Looks are just a bonus for me. I mean... I was dating the most beautiful girl I'd ever seen when I was 17, but she had the personality of one of those fake tan, fake boobs, fake nails tramps that live out in Hollywood. Then, my husband of 2 years, god rest his soul, stole me away when I was 18. So it doesn't really matter to me what they are.

 

I figure if they can love me for who I am, I should be able to do the same.

[rotten boy]

I have been BI as long as I can rember. I kissed the boy next door at age 10 and got spanked for it right after. I never realy thought how I feel about it. It is just what I am. sorry I know that did not help.

[koukoutsi]

That question popped into my mind for the first time when I was in 1st grade of middleschool. I remember that some idiot had written on my desk "you are lesbian". Back then I was a real tomboy, playing football, getting into fights with boys and the fact that I was very touchy-feely with my girl friends gave that impression to others. Then my answer was I'm definitely not a lesbian, but I can't say the same today. It's true that I don't have any desires towards women, except for admiration maybe but I've shared more than one kiss with more than one girls lol so I guess that makes me bisexual...

[Shiho Sasaki]

may i join?

at first i am straight, but then a girl wants to roleplay with me as my seme..

and not so long after that, she confessed to me and i accepted her... lol..

but then, i also like boys... so it means that i am bi... XD

my parent know about it and they told me to break up with her... Q.Q

but i just could not....

 

i think it is too far... XD but it is true..

[Chena93]

wow... I envy you..

I mean, I'm a girl but I like girls...

I really have this beautiful close friend, and it was soooo

hard not to fall in love with her...

She's really nice and she's my perfect kind of girl..

I mean she knows when to be funny at the right time, when to be serious...

and just be herself...

 

I really envy you cause, you got the guts to have a relationship with the same sex (Ur a girl, right...???)

But I'm okay with this relationship with her..

I'm quite content to be by her side as a friend...

 

Oh, yeah... I may be bi, too...

hehe...

[BobCrazy]

I always knew that i was gay even when I was a little child but as a kid I was afraid cause I don't understand what be gay really means, I just knew that people don't like such a thing.

But now i grow up and I know that I'm gay cause i don't feel attracted for girls at all. And boys are so...

[tuti]

I'm a straight girl but I did reach a point in my life when that question popped in my head. I have a friend who is gay and when she told me about her sexuality some time ago...I became curious. And let's face it, yaoi does influence some of us.

 

I wanted to make sure so I kissed my friend and I felt nothing...no spark, no sexual desire...nothing. To be honest I was slightly disappointed, because comparing it when kissing a guy...it felt lame. That was the moment I realized that I am straight. I still like pretty girls and love touching boobs (they are so soft *o*) But that's just for fun I guess...

[toby2663]

I knew i was gay from when i was at junior school. It happened whilst we getting changed for gym my best friend was stood opposite from me and the sun was shining through the window on to him and he just looked so beautiful I coudnt breathe even now the memory makes me smile.In answer to your question how do I feel about being gay to be honest Ive never given it much thought,its who and what I am all my friends and family know and except it ,in part because I could never be bothered hiding it and in part because both of my sisters are very protective and if any one gave any hassle they would descend like the wrath of god. so I have been very lucky that I have always felt loved and protected and not had to suffer as so many gay men have due to ignorance and homophobia.Dont get me wrong you still get shit thrown at you from the big wide world but at least if you have a solid secure base to stand on it makes it much easier to deal with.

[Rei]

@toby

so cuuuuute *___*

[Kurobara69]

I'm bisexual and I discovered it when I was about 12. I never really thought too deeply about it but I knew how people around me were going to react to it if I told them, so I kept it a secret. It was hard keeping it a secret cause I was much more vulnerable then because I was getting trouble in school (I got into a negative circle of friends) so I slipped and accidentally told one of my (supposedly) best friends at that time. She told someone else and I panicked because the word spreads pretty quickly in our school. Luckily, the girl my friend told my secret to was kind and I found out that she was a bi as well. She promised to keep my secret safe and warned my friend to stop trying to spread my secret. My friend shut up after that but I learned my lesson a little too well. I'm always on guard around people, especially when I'm in school (I swear about a third of my batch is gay or bi but most of them just keep it a secret) because I go to an all-girls catholic school in the Philippines and if people knew I was bi and was studying in such a school everything would go downhill. Even worse my mom works there so I really have to keep my secret hidden. I react the same way my class does when the topic is about gays/bis/lesbians so most of my friends don't know I'm bi until I tell them. I try to be as honest as I could with my friends cause they're the ones comforting me when I have a problem that's related to being a bi and I don't think it's fair to them if I lie to them.

[Marygrace94]

haha.. i'm not really a boy.. but the boldness, wow.

[Sly Blue]

Now this is a good question actually.

 

I started questioning it when I was in high school like, the girl I was friends with was really pretty and she understood me in ways that no-one did back then, hell no other person would even bother trying it. I was around 13 at the time but of course I pushed it aside cause I was at an all catholic high school were the majority of high schoolers I knew were very very straight.

 

It wasn't until my last year of high school that I questioned it again because my guy best friend confessed to me that he had feelings for a guy. (5 years later he came out as gay and now had a boyfriend.) But I was like "No I'm straight, I'm sure of it." But that wasn't true because when I was 17 I developed the biggest crush on a girl I met, so I knew by then that I was bisexual at least.

 

Then I identified as a lesbian then as bisexual again and here I am at 21, pansexual and proud!

 

And how did I feel about it?

 

I was scared, like any child would be in a hetronormative environment. But I eventually learnt to accept that I liked girls as well as guys and well I'm pretty happy!

 

I rambled but there we go.

[Hei]

Haha, I'm a male... I didn't know I was gay until I was in middle school. I started dreaming about sexy guys lol I thought I was nuts and tried dating a woman but couldn't bring myself to love any ladies. Thats when I found out I was gay... my mom saw it when I stared at guy who was at a the store... at his butt... >\\\> Anyway... lol, she asked me and I admitted, a bit scared at first. She just smiled and offered encouragment to be who I want, so do my dad. And I tried dating men but I realized then, when I was like 16, I was a uke T.T Now I happily live with my cats and my lovely bf~ My first one lol and my brother -sigh- Hes the oppisite of me.