Faces Of The Past [Ayakashiu&Hideki] (Private)

[-Hideki-]

A somewhat dry smile was tugging on his lips when he heard Aaron say that he liked ‘dessert’ as well because it seemed to him like the other just said it now because he felt obligated to and wanted to tell Ethan what the ginger wanted to hear and he didn’t promise himself too much from this. He generally shouldn’t get his hopes up too high but it was difficult. Too difficult with the way he had always felt about the other man and how he still felt about him. The librarian however unexpectedly spoke further telling him that the difference was rather that he had only wanted the dessert from those chicks but wanted the full menu from the red haired male. His face automatically lit up and the smile got a little wider and brighter too as he heard that, especially seeing the other man blushed like that as he confessed that.

 

Smiling at Wilson the other suddenly moved, leaned over the table and the ginger found the other’s arms embracing him, wrapping around him tightly and Ethan’s heart was beating heavy in his chest, surprise to see on his face as he leaned in and his arms held the other man too. The position was uncomfortable, there was a bloody table between them after all, but he didn’t even mind. He was in heaven. In pure bliss over Aaron instigating body contact, close body contact, non-platonic body contact. Friends didn’t hug like that after all. Especially straight men didn’t hug other men like that. Warmth was spreading through his body and he didn’t want to let go despite them hanging oddly and uncomfortable over the table. Then he was let go of and he couldn’t help but to feel something was taken from him and was now missing as he listened to what the writer told him what made the other man’s nervousness around the whole topic pretty clear again. He took one of the man’s hands between his holding it. “You needn’t worry. We’ll go slow.” He assured him again.

 

It was cute how the other thanked him and called him the best for promising his support with the book and it was even sweeter that he wanted to dedicate it to him. “I’d be honoured if you dedicated a book or anything that you’ve made to me really. But credit is not needed. Nothing you’ll come up with was my idea. I just introduced the thought of considering gay people’s existences in your work; it was more of a request of a gay guy than a concrete idea really.” The ginger found as he couldn’t see that he would have contributed anything to that book at all if it would be written.

 

He shook his head, nodded his head and said the words ‘Yes’ and ‘No’ right behind each other. “I mean of course I would like you to meet my friends. I was just surprised that you thought they might inspire you and I tried to imagine them as book characters to be honest.” He explained decently then. There was a worry about the other meeting his friends though and that was that he wouldn’t like them or vice versa. “I just hope you’d like them.” Ethan added because he had trouble getting Aaron and his friends together in his head. It just was as if they were from completely different worlds.

 

 

“Of course, I can do that as well.” he agreed when the other man suggested him showing him pictures of his friends. The ginger pulled out his phone and searched for the picture from the last New Year’s celebration where they had taken the latest group picture. Shifting some and leaning over to the other he laid his phone in front of Aaron so that he could see the picture that was taken on the roof of the building Marco lived in that had been changed into some kind of ‘garden on the roof’ – he had hired Ethan’s company for it – and they were standing in front of the outdoor bar that was on it.

 

Starting from left to the right he pointed onto the man who was in an exaggerated, comedic way flirting with the camera. “That oddball in the tailcoat right here who looks like Channing Tatum with a three days beard is my best friend Marco.” He told Aaron and then pointed his finger onto the short curvy woman next to him who was looking up to Marco annoyed. She had a side-cut and dyed blue hair, several piercings in her face (septum, cheeks, lips, several on the ears) and wore glasses with a strong black frame and a lot of make-up. “The one in the leather jacket is my friend Elayn and the tall slender woman next to her is her wife.” He moved his finger one person further pointing at the thin and flat-chested lady with caramel skin and long braids. The next in line sat on a bar-stool with crossed legs and was dressed up like a diva from the ‘Golden twenties’ with a glittering tight golden dress and a bronze wig. “That’s Jonas. He’s the friend who does drag I told you about.” He informed Wilson and went to address the man who was the complete opposite of Jonas and was standing behind him leaning his head on his shoulder. “That’s his boyfriend.” Ethan said. “When he and a few of his friend’s entered the bar the first time to visit Jonas I thought they were some homophobic rocker gang or something who were there to beat the shit out of us but not that this was his new boyfriend and his friends.” He admitted as he pointed at the buff man with the dirty blond short hair and thick beard. “He’s incredibly nice though.” the ginger added. “Well, that handsome fellow is me.” He said with a wink and the one kissing my cheek is my ex I recently broke up with, chances that you’ll meet him are low.” The red head commented about the short, slim man with black hair and black eyes who was of Korean heritage before he moved his finger to the last one. “And the one who looks at my ex disapprovingly is my other ex. The one I met online.” He stated, the blond lean man whose face had something elfish even without the costume was standing there in a black suit, his arms crossed in front of his chest and an eyebrow raised disapprovingly above the frame of his glasses. And Ethan had been eyeing Aaron’s face as he had shown him both of his exes incredibly close hoping to see some kind of reaction on it. “That’s it! My closest circle of friends!” he then finished with a smile.

 

The advice that Aaron just asked Tom stuff he asked other kids didn’t help at all. “And what does one talk about with kids?” he asked. He had no idea. It was obvious that a kid had a different way to communicate and other subjects to talk about than adults and Ethan had no idea which that were. He hadn’t had to have a conversation with anyone who wasn’t at least a young adult in decades and he wasn’t actually interested in it either. He never wanted kids, having kids was not his version of family. He had his goldfish and maybe he’d even consider a dog as a pet but definitely no children.

 

Grinning widely he looked at the silver haired when he laughed that cheerfully and amused about the comment of Ethan just bringing Bertram food every morning, telling him that he’d be his best friend then if he’d bring him food every morning. “Ignoring the fact that you can buy your own food and that would defeat the whole reason and purpose as to why I buy it for him, I thought we were already more than just best friends Aaron.” He commented looking into the other’s eyes a smirk playing around his lips. At the subject of Bertram’s smell and the reminder that Aaron had said that Ethan stank the other laughed again and informed him that he didn’t want to snuggle up to Bertram so it wouldn’t be a problem followed by him asking if the homeless man was handsome and dashing and charm him as it would then become a problem. “Who knows!? Maybe he is just your type. Are you into older guys?” Ethan asked in a teasing tone. “He’s recently gotten sixty-three.” The man said hoping to get away with that. He never got away making age-gap jokes at home. Not a single fucking time because they’d all turned them back on him regardless of how far off that subject was.

“However, does it mean that you wanted to snuggle up with me already when you made that remark about my smell? Did you have ulterior motives when you invited me to play ‘games’?” he asked teasingly.

 

Ethan was glad that the other liked his suggestion of cosplaying DMC characters, not only liking it but being that enthusiastic about it, informing him that he wanted to cosplay Nero then. “Then we’ll do DMC4 and I’ll cosplay Dante then.” He grinned. “Making you forget about that chick Nero was into and wanted to safe in the game. I forgot her name and I didn’t like her anyway.” He laughed amused.

 

 

 

 

After Aaron had moved towards him and was standing close before him, those blue eyes peering deeply into his, Ethan’s hungry eyes were staring back at him, inhaling the man’s scent, being close enough to feel the breath of the other on his lips, his dick aching in anticipation. Then the other was going onto his knees in front of him and fondling with his belt and as he watched him he could see that the other was nervous. Clearly nervous, even biting his lower lip, not at all confident about this in anyway and the man’s nervousness about this made the ginger somewhat nervous too because he was seeing a “toothy” experience coming that would not exactly be pleasant for him and he asked himself if this had been a good request to make from him after all.

 

Chilly air kissed the throbbing heat of his erection as the other had finally pulled down his pants and boxers, his hard rod springing free on eye level with the other man. Aaron stared at him, he stared at his cock intensely and it was a little awkward to have someone staring at your dick like that without doing anything and because it was Aaron there were questions popping up on his mind. ‘Was he averse to sucking another man’s cock? Was he thinking about whether he should or shouldn’t do it? Was it too small, too big, too anything for him to just get to it? Was being confronted with a dick like that a turn off for him?’ and such things because the other was actually fucking staring at him long enough for it while Cornwell craved to have his cock sucked or at least touched. Hearing the other gulp as if it was a task that he had to do but wasn’t thrilled to, that was unpleasant and terrifying to him he was tempted to just pull his pants up again, say ‘Nevermind, see you’ and be gone because at this point it was getting embarrassing for him.

 

Then the other’s gaze met his though and he could feel the man’s hands sliding up his thighs and he felt relieved that the other was finally touching him at least. The thoughts and doubts and all of that was wiped away then when he felt the other’s hand tighten around his heated length, caressing him before the other did it and he felt the wet, slippery tongue giving his dick a lick. Ethan was getting more aroused as he felt the tongue of the man he desired that much sliding along the thick perking out vein up to the glans and a gasp was coming from him, an intense spark shooting through him when the other’s tongue circled around his glans, pressing onto the slit making him start to feel good when the other’s lips closed around his head and the man started to suck him somewhat hesitantly and carefully.

 

The patience that he had to bring up as the other was only slowly working himself to burying his whole length into his mouth paid off as sparks of pleasure were starting to overtake his body when the other was sucking him more eagerly and was bobbing his head. The red head’s hands were reaching down to the other man’s head, running through his silky hair, messing it up, placing his hands onto the other man’s head giving him some guidance. For the other doing that the first time ever it felt really great, he was doing a decent job and he had not had to meet his teeth what was definitely a positive surprise after the unconfident way the other had acted about this before.

 

His hips were thrusting according to the rhythm automatically and he had to restrain himself, his temperature on the rise and his breath getting more laboured. His cock was leaking pre-cum into the other man’s mouth and the pleasure he felt only made him crave more intensity, more friction and it got harder and harder for him to restrain himself despite the Aaron’s hand assisting. He wanted to fuck his face so badly, he wanted the other to deep-throat him, to feel that incredible, mindblowing tightness of the other’s throat, he yearned for it. “The hand. Take it away pleasue.” He asked him with a husky, aroused voice.

 

Ethan’s thrusts got deeper and faster, his cock making its way further down the other man’s throat and he could feel that amazing tightness around the tip of his cock and it made an intense electrifying pleasure stream through him and up into his head, making his vision blurry with every thrust and a deep growl of pleasure escaped the red head, his finger’s digging deeper into the other man’s hair. Fucking the man’s throat now Ethan leaned his head back into his neck, his body was on fire from the pleasure the wet, hot tightness caused him and he let out growls and moans from time to time, having to keep himself from thrusting into him too hard in his ecstasy. His mouth was slightly opened, he was panting hard and his eyes were half-lidded, his face looking lewd and erotic that twisted in pleasure. “Fuck! Aaron!” he moaned his mind wiped clean from anything else than the intense strucks of thunder rushing through him, his body sweating and way too hot under his suit. After a while, feeling how his muscles constricted tightly and how he was at the edge of orgasm, yearning for the other to push him over it, his fingers burying themselves deep into those fine strands of silver hair. “Shit!” he groaned. “Aaron… I’m…” too late. The ginger’s hips were bucking up into the man’s mouth, his eyes went shut completely and he growled deeply as he shot his load of sperm down the other’s throat, his heart pounding like crazy, nearly breaking through his chest, feeling a little drunk on the pleasure and dizzy, sinking back against the table, pulling his glistering, cum dripping cock out of the other man’s mouth, his hazel eyes looking at the other with a satisfaction and content in his gaze, his chest sinking and rising quickly.

[Ayakashiu]

If Aaron felt what he said was too corny before, he changed his mind when his friend’s face lit up and his smile grew wider. Seeing Ethan looking like that, made something tug in his chest and he wanted to see that expression every day, wanted the other to look at him like that every day. When he reached for the man sitting in front of him, he might have squeezed him a little too hard, but his friend returned the embrace and the light-haired male couldn’t help but bury his head into the ginger’s neck, before letting go.

 

When his friend took his hand into his own and reassured him that they won’t rush anything, he shot him a grateful smile. It did made him wonder, if Ethan really is okay with taking things so slow and how much patience must he have, holding back ever since high school. The fact that his friend never made a move on him was surprising for Aaron, because if the situation was reversed, he wasn’t sure he could hold back and hid it from the other. Or maybe it was just that his friend didn’t want to sleep with him all that much; the thought was strangely distressing for the light-haired male and it made him want to prove himself to his friend.

 

“Don’t be so modest. A good idea is half of the book and besides, I want to dedicate it to you, if it will be good. If not, we’ll just burn it and pretend it never happened,” he joked. His friend explained why he looked so lost in thought a moment ago and the light-haired male nodded, but the way the ginger said he hoped Aaron would like them, sounded unconvincing. What if his friend thought they might not like him? The notion was worrisome, so he said quietly, “I just hope they will like me.”

 

Ethan did seem to like the idea of showing him a picture, as he searched for one on his phone right away, explaining to Aaron who was who. The first person who was pointed out, was a handsome guy who was making a funny expression and the light-haired male chuckled, thinking the guy must be fun to be around. But as he heard that he is Ethan’s best friend, he couldn’t help but feel hurt. He knew that the ginger would find a new best friend after leaving here, it was just that he was still thinking about Ethan as his best friend and he didn’t want to be replaced with someone else. The ginger moved to the next person, who was a fierce looking woman and she seemed annoyed with the first guy. Aaron decided he likes her already. The next pair was the most unusual one and he couldn’t help but comment, “You’re right, I would never say they could be a couple! And the guy does look intimidating, so it’s no wonder you thought they were gonna beat you up.” The next one was Ethan and Aaron was happy to hear he most likely won’t get to meet the guy who was kissing his cheek. He abstained from making a comment, the ginger already moving on, explaining who the last guy was. Hearing who it was, made Aaron tense up and he had to forcefully stop himself from making a grimace, keeping a neutral face expression. This was the guy that took Ethan in, when he left their hometown and the light-haired male couldn’t help himself but feel resentful about that. He remembered his friend’s words about having a thing for elves, which only made him feel more annoyed by the guy, easily imagining that look of disapproval being directed towards himself. He regretted asking Ethan to show him a picture, because he would be far better off not knowing about the last guy. His reply came out drier than he wanted, “I’m really looking forward to meeting them one day, they look like really interesting people.”

 

The question what does one talk about with kids, confused the light-haired male for a moment. He never really gave it any thought, because he usually talked to them about books or comics and conversing with them just came naturally to him. “Em, I guess I usually ask them about comics and how’s school, if they are studying and doing their homework. Now that you asked, I’m not sure what to tell you. I think it’s best not to think too much about it, but just see where it goes. Most of the time kids ask a lot of questions themselves and I just reply to them.” He pulled his hand through his hair, feeling awkward for not being of any help. He didn’t think of himself as someone who was very good with kids, but he did meet a lot of them and they usually liked him well enough, so he got used to being around them.

 

Aaron scoffed, before his mouth turned into an impish grin as he replied, “It doesn’t matter if I can buy my own food, it’s the thought that counts!” As his friend reminded him they weren’t just best friends anymore, but something more, he couldn’t help but blush a little. Yes they were something more and for a person who was never in a committed relationship that was a novelty. Ethan was his boyfriend and their relationship was totally different from any relationships Aaron had before, but he really needed to change his perception, because the ginger wouldn’t be too happy knowing, Aaron was still thinking of him as ‘his friend’. The other teased him about Bertram being old and the light-haired male couldn’t help but tease back. “Oh, that’s prime age. Maybe it is best if you don’t introduce us, he does sound like quite a catch.” There was a grin on his face, as he said that, but it faltered a bit when he was remembered about that guy, who took Ethan in; he was also older than the ginger. So when his boyfriend hinted that he might have ulterior motives last night, he was still distracted as he murmured his reply, “I always want to snuggle with you, but I wouldn’t say I had any ulterior motives.” It took him a moment to realize what he just said, before he could feel his face growing hot his mouth opening and closing a few times, before he just groaned and buried his face into his hand. He couldn’t imagine being cozier than yesterday, when he was lying in his boyfriend’s lap, Ethan stroking his hair, but it was much more embarrassing admitting it out loud and he wanted to kick himself for getting lost in his thoughts, not paying attention to what he was saying. He looked up, his face still half-covered with his hand. “Let’s forget what I just said, Bertram the hot homeless guy distracted me and I didn’t know what I was saying.” He tried to joke it off, still feeling embarrassed.

 

Choosing the fourth instalment of the game suited Aaron, because Nero had approximately the same hair length as himself, so he really didn’t need to worry about that. In the upcoming fifth instalment, Nero will have short hair and while he looked really cool. Aaron didn’t really feel like cutting his hair to that length. “Great. You will look awesome as Dante.” The light-haired male laughed at the last comment. “I don’t remember her name either, but I bet you’ll really make me forget all about her.” He shot an appreciative look at his friend, imagining he would look hot and badass as Dante.

 

 

 

When the light-haired male looked up from his position on the floor, he couldn’t quite discern the ginger’s expression. But the gasp he elicited from the other, gave Aaron a little more confidence to continue. He soon felt Ethan’s hands in his hair and it sent shivers down his spine, his boyfriend guiding him as his hips started to move in synch with his mouth. The light-haired male squeezed the hand still resting on the other’s thigh for support and making sure his boyfriend won’t thrust his dick too deep.

 

Hearing Ethan’s labored breathing, made his confidence rise and as he heard the request, said in that husky voice, he complied without thinking what it meant, removing his hand, letting it rest on the ginger’s thigh. This enabled his boyfriend to thrust deeper into his throat and Aaron’s eyes filled with tears, as he tried hard to breathe through his gag reflex, his lips encircling the erection in his mouth tightly. Not being used to this, his muscles started to hurt from the constant sucking and he was gripping Ethan tightly for support, his throat assaulted by the constant thrusts of the ginger’s hips. But hearing his friend growl and call his name, seeing his face twisted in pleasure and knowing he was the cause of this, was arousing, so Aaron focused on his breathing, leaving his boyfriend to do as he pleases with his mouth.

 

After what seemed like eternity to him, he heard the other curse and before he could react, he felt warm liquid shot into his throat as Ethan buried his cock into his mouth, cumming inside. It was a shock and Aaron’s eyes opened wide as he tried to keep himself from gaging and spitting everything out. He manage to calm himself and gulp it down, trying not to think that another man just finished into his mouth. But as he looked up, meeting his boyfriend’s gaze, he forgot about his discomfort. Ethan’s breathing was still labored and he looked sinful, looming above him with that content look in his eyes. The light-haired male was relieved that he was able to satisfy the other, especially since yesterday he got a mind-blowing blow job from him.

 

He rose awkwardly, rubbing muscles on his chin that was aching from all the actions it wasn’t used to, his throat and mouth feeling sore. His voice sounded hoarse as he spoke, “Not so bad for the first time, huh?” a lopsided smile forming on his lips, as he looked up towards Ethan under his lashes. He needed to hear Ethan say he did well, to reassure him, because he was feeling panic starting to well up. Receiving a blow job from a guy or being the one giving it was a big difference and the light-haired male was just starting to realize that. He suddenly felt like they were moving too fast, still feeling Ethan’s taste on his tongue. If someone would tell him his childhood best friend will be cumming into his mouth, he would think they are mental, but he was here now, sucking his boyfriend off at his work place, even getting aroused while doing it. He fidgeted nervously, waiting for the ginger to break the silence, feeling confused about everything. He thought he would feel aversion to doing something like this to another guy, but seeing his boyfriend satisfied, made his stomach clench and he was painfully aware of his own erection. The situation reminded him of a dog, waiting for his master to praise him for being a good boy.

[-Hideki-]

Chuckling he looked at the other man, his head leaned a little to the side. “Maybe, but ‘include gay characters’ isn’t exactly a plot idea is it?” The ginger jested and smiled at the other widely when he said he just wished to dedicate it to him if it was good. “I’d be more than happy if you dedicated it to me regardless of how good or bad it was. It’s something you made.” He said and his hazel eyes looked at the other rather warmly. ‘I want you to dedicate yourself and your life to me a lot more even.’ The man thought as he was gazing into those almost aquamarine blue eyes. Ethan was thrown out of his thoughts and imagining the other man telling him that he wanted to be all his, wholly, his mind, heart and his body, made heat build up inside of him when Aaron expressed how he hoped that his friends would like him. “I hope that too. I just generally hope that you guys will get along.” He told the other and he really did hope exactly that.

 

If seeing his exes, both his recent ex, Jun-Seo and Cole - the one he had met online over a nerd forum and with whom he had cosplayed and done LARP who had been dressed up like an elf, not to confuse with Richard the older polygamous guy he had moved in with as a teen who was neither a part of their friend group nor on the photo – made Aaron feel anything at all he didn’t show it and was good at hiding it. The only time he had felt and sensed the other man’s discontent had been when he had called Marco his best friend, as if the man was stealing the spot in the red head’s life Wilson really wanted and it was a little frustrating to Ethan who wanted the other man to be his boyfriend, his partner and not his best friend. He forced himself to focus on the comment the other had made regarding Jonas’s boyfriend though and he chuckled. “He does right. But he is super nice and open minded. And you’ll never guess what this bloke does for a living either. It kinda kills all the bad boy impression and intimidation off instantly.” Ethan said because talking about Jonas gym jock rocker boyfriend and ignoring what really concerned him was a lot easier. He couldn’t however ignore it anymore when the librarian said that he was looking forward to meet his friends and that they looked like interesting people while it sounded like the absolute opposite and it made Cornwell get a little tense, scratching his chin. “I see.” He said but he couldn’t just leave it at that because this bothered him. “Why doesn’t it sound like that then?” he asked. “Why does it sound like you already don’t like them from just their photo?” he asked. “I really want you to like them genuinely, they are my friends, I spend a lot of time with them and I won’t leave them behind. So maybe give them an actual chance before sounding so dismissive and disinterested in them, Marco too. He didn’t steal your place. I’ve always had other feelings for you than for him. I’m sorry if that’s not good enough or what you want.” The ginger told him.

 

“That’s a different kind of ‘bringing food though’. What you are talking about is showing affection and mindfulness to a lover, what I did right now bringing you those cupcakes because you said you liked them. What I’m doing for Bertram is helping someone who might starve if no one would give him food or chump change and whom most people screw up their noses at and wouldn’t consider speaking to.” He explained the obvious difference between what Aaron was mentioning and how his relations to Bertram really were. The ginger grinned though when the writer teased him back after he had asked him if he were into older guys because Bertram was sixty-three, calling it prime age. “I don’t want to stand in the way of the greatest romance of the century, even though I’d certainly be jealous.” He joked with a wink internally cheering because he had gotten away with the age gap joke and no one had mentioned Richard and mocked him for having fallen in love with a man twice his age back then. Sure the guy had been polygamous but Ethan had still felt something for him and vice versa, although he himself was strictly monogamous and had gotten hurt due to that fact. He also didn’t regret loving that man who had been the age he was now when he had been seventeen but he had gotten judged for it, even from people in his friend group, especially Elayn who had been around and witnessed that relationship. Marco had already been friends with Ethan back then in college too but Marco had been Marco already and not judged and been more interested in whether the man was good in bed, although he too had made jokes about the age thing occasionally.

 

Ethan outgrinned the Cheshire Cat and his eyes shone when Aaron was responding to his teasing honestly and told him that he always wanted to snuggle with him. The way the other then groaned and frustratingly facepalmed only amused him and made him laugh. His face got more serious and even a little stern when the silver haired tried to retreat from what he had just said, trying to claim he had been distracted and didn’t mean it though and he sighed annoyed. “No!” he objected. “I won’t forget it.” Ethan refused. “You can claim that Bertram distracted you all you want I don’t buy it. You like snuggling with me, face it and stop denying it.” He demanded, took the wrist of the other man’s hand, pulled it away from his face, leaned over and kissed him deeply and claiming.

 

 

 

Calming his breath his mind stayed empty for a moment as he leaned there against the table, his muscles relaxing after his orgasm before he pulled up and closed his pants. His eyes moved down when Aaron moved and got up from the ground, standing before him now, rubbing his jaw speaking in a voice that sounded a little hoarse, stating or more like asking if it wasn’t that bad for the first time, giving him a smile that just made him seem adorable to him and made his heart swell. The red head wrapped an arm around the other man's hips. “Not bad at all.” He said, the other hand brushing over his cheek, caressing his jaw before lifting his face up to kiss him devouringly, his tongue seemingly wanting to become one with the other’s, putting the last bit of breath he had into the kiss before he had to break it and was left breathless. “It felt great.” Ethan let him know huskily, letting his thumb brush over the other man’s lips, looking into his eyes. “When you’ve acted that shy and uncertain I feared the worst.” He admitted with a laugh, showing his teeth as to suggest what worst he had feared.

 

“How do you feel though? How was it for you?” he asked and he sincerely wanted to know. He usually never felt the need to ask that when a guy had given him a blowjob but this was Aaron. The Aaron who had only ever been with women before and had probably never even considered giving another man head. “Sorry if I got a little carried away!” He mentioned looking into the other man’s eyes. Then he wondered something. Ethan himself got turned on giving his man a blowjob, it aroused him to make him feel as good as he felt when a man did that for him and the smell and taste and feeling of his boyfriends cocks in his mouth had also always aroused him, not to mention the hot reactions so he was wondering if Aaron had gotten aroused from it too or if it had just been a task for him ranging from being neutral about it to having found it unpleasant, awful or disgusting. And what was he thinking about the fact that he had ejaculated into his mouth and he had been swallowing his seeds?

 

It made his heart rate go up again when he was slowly letting the hand that was on the other’s hip travel downstairs. He needed to know. His hand and fingers went over the hem of the man’s pants and then down until he reached his crotch. Ethan could feel the heated bugle Aaron Wilson’s erection created in those pants of his and it was as if a heavy rock fell from his chest and feeling how hard the other man had gotten from sucking him off was exciting to him and his eyes flashed up and he smiled happily and widely, his palm rubbing over the tent before his hand firmly grabbed the other man’s hard dick through the fabric. “I’m glad.” He whispered into his ear, before he kissed and nibbled on the other’s jaw. “I’m happy that sucking cock arouses you like that too. I was worried you might have hated the experience.” He confessed, unbuttoning the man’s pants.

[Ayakashiu]

His friend was joking about not really helping much with this book, but the way Aaron saw it, he would never took on a project like that by himself and he would go about it in a totally different manner. Ethan telling him what kind of character he wants to see and to just be a normal book, was the base for the whole story and he will be the one answering the writers endless questions in the future, so it was only fair to acknowledge his part. The warmth radiating from the other’s hazel eyes and the way he said he’d be more than happy with the dedication, made the writer smile widely. He felt all fluffy inside, because the ginger thought well about his work and has shown a lot of support already, being prepared to read all the books he’s written. His further words calmed down the light-haired male a little, because he was hoping to get along with Ethan’s friends too. He only nodded in response.

 

Being told he’ll never guess what the intimidating man in the picture does for a living, spiked his curiosity and he asked, “What does he do for a living?” He didn’t even try guessing, having a hard time imagining what a person looking like that could do for a living that would kill his bad boy impression. But his dry reply didn’t go by unnoticed by the ginger and when he was confronted about it, he had half a mind to just deny it and pretend he didn’t mean it like that, but decided against it. He wanted to know how come Ethan is still hanging out with one of his exes. “That guy,” he pointed at his boyfriend’s ex, “You said he was the one you met online. Is he the one you stayed with when you left?” He waited a moment to take a deep breath, before he continued, “I can’t help but not like the way he stares disapprovingly at this guy,” he pointed to the dark male next to Ethan this time. “I get the feeling he will disapprove of me too. And I don’t like the fact that you still hang out with him, he seems like he isn’t over you.” He didn’t plan to share other things that bothered him too, like the guy seeming really hot and cool; it was intimidating to compete with a guy like that. He then address the comment about Marco. “I didn’t want to sound dismissive about others, they do look like interesting people to meet, Marco too. I’m just not used to hearing you refer to anyone else as your best friend,” he said in an apologetic tone. “You say you always had other feelings for me, but you still saw me as your best friend, didn’t you? Those feelings aren’t mutually exclusive.” He furrowed his brow as he said that, because he didn’t really have any good experience with relationships and he believed in friendship more. Sure, if you found the right person, the relationship was more intimate, but he couldn’t imagine not building a lasting union on friendship too. So hearing his boyfriend say he had other feelings for him was disheartening. What if those feelings passed?

 

Listening to explanation, how bringing a homeless man food was different than bringing him food, brought a soft smile on Aaron’s face. “I know it’s different Ethan and I found it sweet that you are prepared to do that for a stranger.” The comment about this being the greatest romance of the century, did made him burst out with laughter and their silly conversation was bringing tears to his eyes, as his stomach started to hurt from all the laughter. It didn’t last long though, as his friend refused to forget about the absentminded comment he made. The other pulled his hand away from his face and it made the light-haired male groan again, but it was muffled by his boyfriend’s lips that collided with his in a claiming kiss. The sudden action surprised the librarian and he inhaled deeply through his nose, a moment passing before he responded hesitatingly, moving his lips in synch with Ethan’s. His face was still beet red as they parted, but the other not teasing him about it gave him courage to say quietly, “I also like when you play with my hair.” It was still embarrassing, but if the ginger knew about it, he might do it more often.

 

 

 

His boyfriend wrapped one arm reassuringly around his hips, as he said it wasn’t bad at all. He was still feeling awkward though and the kiss was a welcome distraction. The salty taste of cum, mixed with the sweeter taste of cupcakes that the ginger ate before, when his tongue found its way into Aaron’s mouth. This time the librarian was more eager and he wrapped his own hands around the taller man’s torso, pulling himself closer as his own tongue followed suit. The kiss was cut short as the ginger pulled away breathless and the librarian noticed his chest rising and falling faster too. Hearing it felt great, especially in that husky voice, chased his doubts away. He just went down on his boyfriend, it wasn’t such a big deal, right? He was just repaying the favor from yesterday. Ethan continued with admitting, he was afraid the light-haired male might use his teeth and it made him grin, before he playfully bit the thumb that was caressing his lip. Letting it go as laugh bubbled out of him, he replied, “That was one thing I knew for sure not to do, even if I never did it before.” He knew how unpleasant that can be for a guy, so he was making sure his teeth didn't graze his boyfriend's cock, as he was sucking him off.

 

It was touching that his boyfriend worried about how he felt and even apologized for taking the lead in the end, so he couldn’t help but be honest about it. “It was…harder than I thought it would be. And uncomfortable.” He was referring to almost gagging a few times and the ache from sucking. “I would also appreciate, if you could warn me next time, before you know, you cum into my mouth. But I guess you spilling yourself all over my face would make me feel like we’re shooting a porn, so my mouth was probably a better choice.” He chuckled, his fingers making small circles on the ginger’s back, as he admitted, “But I like seeing you that way, when you make lewd expressions and groan in pleasure, so I don’t mind all that.” An impish grin was forming on his face, as he remembered just how erotic Ethan looked and that he was the cause for this. He wanted to see him like that more often, but he couldn’t quite bring himself to say it out loud.

 

The hand wrapped around his hip moved, finding its way to the front of his pants and to the bulge that formed there. Now it really felt like he was getting a reward for being a good boy and if Aaron had a tail, he would wiggle it right now. Feeling the whisper caress his ear and hearing that his boyfriend was glad he was hard, made his breath hitch. His previous partners weren’t always pleased about having to deal with it, so hearing Ethan say that made him really happy too. He didn’t bother correcting the ginger, as he said he’s happy that sucking cock arouses him and that he doesn’t hate it. While it was true the librarian didn’t exactly hate it, it wasn’t something he really wanted to do either. He got this way because of Ethan, because of the faces and sounds he made that showed the pleasure he was feeling and he was the only guy Aaron was prepared to do this for.

 

The pressure over his erection was eased a bit, as his boyfriend unbuttoned his pants and he sighed contently, his head finding a comfortable position on his boyfriend’s shoulder. He would lie, if he would say to the other he doesn’t need to do this. Right now, he was craving Ethan’s touch on his naked skin and he nudged his neck with his nose, urging him to go on. The previous kisses, flirting with food and doing something like this, when they could be found out any minute, riled him up, so he didn’t need much.

[-Hideki-]

“Spoilesport!” he called the other man as Aaron apparently didn’t want to partake in the guessing game Ethan had attempted to make out of the occupation of Jonas’s boyfriend. “He works in the animal shelter. Saving puppies and nursing them back to health and stuff.” He then told him. It had at least baffled the ginger when he had found that out. He had totally been certain the guy was a car mechanic or a construction worker just everything else but caring for thrown away pets their owners didn’t want anymore. Jonas had visited his boyfriend together with Ethan at the animal shelter once though and he really worked there and the animals loved him. He had been friendly with his colleagues as well and something that the ginger had not expected from someone who looked like this guy either had been that he had been not been ashamed or embarrassed or closeted and been openly gay and had approached Jonas with an endearing kiss as he had visited at his workplace.

 

Having confronted the other about his dishonest sounding phrase about looking forward to meet his friends the silver haired responded in the same dry tone mixed in with something accusatory when he pointed his finger onto a person on the photo. “What is with Mar….” he then looked down and saw that the other was not pointing at Marco but at Cole. He already wanted to feel happy that the librarian might actually not be totally indifferent about seeing his exes but he couldn’t know just yet, he had to listen further to what issue the other took with him. The question that was actually asked was unexpected and it made Ethan blink his eyes. Aaron apparently confused Cole with Richard and he apparently seemed to not like the idea of Richard or felt uncomfortable by the knowledge of the age gap. He wasn’t the only one. Elayn outright hated Richard and judged Ethan for their past relationship. The red head sighed. “No.” he told him. “The one I moved in with when I left is Richard, this is Cole, the one I met at that nerd forum and met the first time at comic con and have a lot in common with. And Richard is not on this photo. But isn’t that obvious? Cole is our age and Richard must be over fifty by now.” the ginger answered the question for him. “Why? Do you find it disgusting or weird that I have been with someone that much older?” he asked because that was not unusual, he had gotten hate for it before.

 

After he had answered that question Aaron expressed something else and it made his heart pound high for a second because it seemed like maybe there was even something like a little jealousy after all. Maybe Wilson wasn’t completely indifferent and did care. At least it sounded like that when he said that he didn’t like the fact that he was still hanging out with him. “We’ve broken up years ago after having been a couple for many years.” He informed him. “And we are still friends because there has never been bad blood between us, because the break up wasn’t a bad one. He got the opportunity to go to Tokio for his career for two years and it was a great opportunity in more than just one way and it made him help to climb the ladder further up too. So I told him to do it because he’d have blamed me his entire life if he didn’t. He did but we both knew we had to break up then because neither of us was made for a long distance relationship. We broke up and agreed that if we were still single after those two years we’d get back together. We weren’t. He returned with a Japanese guy. I found someone else too but we didn’t see why we shouldn’t be friends anymore.” Ethan honestly explained to the other man.

 

Ethan couldn’t help but to laugh when Aaron expressed that he worried that Cole might look at him this disapprovingly too and that he seemed as if he wasn’t over Ethan because the ginger found the idea absurd, he had never realised anything like that. Just that he was uncomfortable with his new boyfriends, which had to be because it always was a weird situation to meet someone’s new love as an ex. “I don’t think that this is true. He’s over me just fine.” He let the other know. “And it’s not like he looked at Jun like this all the time. He only looked at him disapprovingly when we kiss…..” he realised how that sounded. “Oh!” The ginger said looking a little dumbfounded before he shoved that thought to the side. “Anyway, I’m glad that you are at least a little jealous. I thought you’d not care at all. It was disheartening.” The ginger admitted with a smile laying his hand onto Aaron’s knee under the table.

 

Listening closely, musing, he hummed. “Well, it’s true that there was a strong friendship between the two of us and that I knew that the way you and society perceived our relationship was as solely best friends. But I loved you. In a way you love no friend. Hence I thought about you as the guy I love who’ll never love me back and not my best friend regardless of the foundation of friendship that our relationship clearly had and still has if you understand what I’m saying.” He tried to explain it to the other as good as he could. “It’s simply more than that.” the red head told him. “I’m feeling differently for you than for Marco. More intense and breathtaking!” The ginger fought to put that into clear words.

 

His protest had been followed by him kissing Aaron passionately and when their kiss broke he looked into the deep red face of the man before he heard the librarian quietly and embarrassedly confess that he also liked when Ethan played with his hair. The wide, beaming smile was back on Cornwell’s face and he leaned his forehead against Aaron’s, his hand reaching for the silky, silver strands of hair. “Good.” He commented. “Because I like playing with it.” Ethan stated confidently, still smiling, not embarrassed in the slightest, curling a strand of Aaron’s hair around his index finger.

 

 

 

 

After they had shared an eager, heated, messy and breathless kiss and Aaron had playfully bit his finger telling him how he had paid special attention to not let his teeth meet the ginger’s cock what he had fortunately succeeded in he listened to the writer answering the questions he had asked him, wanting to know how the other was feeling about sucking him off. An awkward expression was forming on his face, he appreciated the honesty but the adjectives used weren’t exactly positive and didn’t make it seem like the other had found anything he had enjoyed about sucking his dick. He also criticised Cornwell for cumming into his mouth and Ethan grinned whilst chewing on his bottom lip slightly since it was clear that the other hadn’t liked that at all and wanted to be warned beforehand to prevent him ejaculating into his mouth next time.

 

The remark that followed about how this was still better than shooting his load all over his face because that would have made the man feel as though they were recording a porn movie made a laugh escape him though. While Ethan could see how this looked hot and all in porn it was nothing that he cared to do in reality. He couldn’t find much about coating his boyfriend’s faces in his sperm, there was more thrilling and pleasing stuff to do together, it wasn’t a real turn on, wasn’t a turn off either but he was just ‘meh’ about it. Sure, if he would have had a boyfriend who was into that and had wanted the red head to ejaculate onto his face he would have done it for him because he didn’t dislike doing that but if that was nothing that a partner specifically wished he wouldn’t care to suggest it. What he absolutely didn’t want was a guy he was with to do that to his face. He strongly disliked it. At best it just made him think ‘Seriously?’ and roll his eyes irritated. It had once happened according to the guy accidentally. When he had been twenty-one and had broken up with Richard a while before and he had dated that guy from the theatre club in college and they had been in the mall and had ended up sucking each other off in the changing cubicle in a shop and he had ejaculated all over his face. It had pissed Ethan off completely, especially considering that he had not had the opportunity to clean his face properly there. It had made him hiss:”Fuck! Man, I’m going back to dating older guys again.”

 

What was a definite turn on for the ginger though was pulling out and jerking his cock while his guy opened his mouth wide for him to finish in it so that he could see his sperm on his tongue and lips before he swallowed it down. Or his guy devotedly licking off his sperm or just generally swallowing it after a blowjob. So it was disappointing and unfortunate that the other seemed to be rather opposed to it. “I see. I usually don’t bother warning my partners because they usually can tell when I’m about to cum but I tried to tell you I just had bad timing.” He informed him giving him a slight smile. “How are my chances that you just hated me cumming into your mouth and swallowing because you just aren’t used to it yet because you have only been with women and their junk doesn’t even do anything at all and nothing happens when they cum either? And that you’d figure you are totally into cocks and sucking my cock and don’t mind swallowing sperm soon?” he asked half jestingly half hopeful.

 

Being told that the man had at least found it hot and arousing how much pleasure he had caused Ethan and he had liked to hear his noises and see his face twisted in pleasure and that this made him not mind that much was making him feel at least a little better knowing the man hadn’t just completely hated doing that and it had not been an unpleasant hassle for him entirely. “At least you didn’t dislike it completely.” The man commented. He loved Aaron, knowing that he didn’t like sucking his dick was not the greatest news to him and it didn’t make him feel good about bringing it up again soon but it was something the ginger enjoyed, something that was part of sex for him and that he’d miss if they continued their started relationship and the other would not suck him off anymore.

 

The way Aaron looked at him, seeming so happy, after Ethan had figured out that Wilson had quite enjoyed sucking his cock after all because it had made him hard - no matter what exactly about it had caused that positive outcome for the silver haired male - and he had expressed his delight about that fact, was priceless and it made the red heads heart beat faster to be looked at like that by the other man. To be looked at like this by none other than Aaron. There was a fuzzy feeling growing in his stomach while he was undoing the man’s pants, pulling them down as the other man rested his head onto his shoulder, feeling the gentle nudging of his nose against his neck as his hand groped the man’s balls, squeezing and massaging them, whilst taking the other hand away from Aaron’s neck, bringing it down to the man’s length.

 

Letting his hand wander over the shaft, rubbing and poking the thick vein on the other man’s penis, he was teasing him some, letting it slide up and down before he went up and his thumb was rubbing over the glans, then shoved under the foreskin, circling around, then rubbing over it again, pressing onto the slit and doing circles again. As the man’s rock hard cock was oozing pre-cum he smeared it over the glans and the shaft, grabbing his length properly, stroking him more seriously and with more pressure now, gradually tightening and strengthening the grip of his hand, his strokes getting more vigorous and faster, his other hand toying with Aaron’s balls, kneading them, nudging his nose against the man’s neck affectionately, pressing kisses onto Wilson’s heated skin.

[Ayakashiu]

Being called a spoilsport, made him stick his tongue out at the ginger. He was surprised, hearing what the intimidating man actually does for a living. Somehow he couldn’t quite see him surrounded by cute little puppies, bulldogs or pitbulls maybe, but it was still hard to imagine and it made him grin. “That’s…surprising, to say the least. But a good example of how looks can be deceiving.” He looked at the ginger, his grin getting wider. “Kind of like you, looking so composed and adult in your suit, while in reality you’re just a big kid,” the light-haired male teased, actually liking his boyfriend getting childish and playful.

 

Aaron’s dry tone was returned in kind when his friend spoke, but there was a moment of confusion as they seemed to be pointing at different people on the photo. But his boyfriend’s sentence got cut off, when he realized the librarian wasn’t talking about Marco, so Aaron continued talking, the other’s ex bothering him far more than his new best friend. The explanation he got, made him frown even more, as he raised his hand, scratching his head. Really great, not only did he dislike this Richard, who he still felt was partially responsible for Ethan leaving, but now there was Cole, who was still hanging around his boyfriend. He made a mental note to pay more attention, when the ginger talked about his exes, because he was starting to mix everything up. It wasn’t really a surprise, seeing how he could barely remember the names of his own exes, not to mention he didn’t really want Ethan to talk or think about his. But the guy on the photo really did look their age. The question about finding the age gap between him and his ex disgusting, made him raise an eyebrow. The librarian disliked everything about Richard already, but he wasn’t weirded out by the difference in years. “I don’t really care about his age, but from what you told me, I still don’t like the guy,” he murmured, at least remembering the ginger telling him, how their relationship ended because the old guy wasn’t monogamous.

 

His boyfriend then proceeded to tell him how the relationship with Cole ended, but it didn’t help brighten Aaron’s mood. No wonder the guy looked like he wasn’t over Ethan, they didn’t break up because there was something wrong in their relationship, but for practical reasons. It made him wonder, if his boyfriend is really over that guy too. The ginger thought that idea funny though, because he laughed when the light-haired male expressed his doubts. Hearing him say Cole only looked at him like that, when he kissed another guy and seeing the dumbfounded expression cross his boyfriend’s face, like he just realized something, irritated him. He suddenly didn’t want to talk about this guy anymore and hearing Ethan say he’s happy that he seems a little jealous, irritated him even more, so he had to fight the instinct to move his leg, when he felt a hand on it. He cared much more than he was letting show, so the only reply he managed was a quiet, “Mhm.”

 

Hearing his boyfriend say there was indeed strong friendship between them and that he felt more intensely for him, than for Marco, did calm him down a little. It wasn’t exactly what he wanted to hear, especially the part that he was ‘the guy that won’t love him back, not his best friend’, but at least they were of the same opinion, the foundation of their relationship being friendship. “I feel differently for you too, more intensely than for any of the other people around me,” he murmured in response.

 

The beaming smile on the ginger’s face that accompanied his confession, feeling his finger curl his hair and the confident comment how it was good, because he liked playing with his hair, made Aaron relax. His boyfriend did call him cute a lot, so maybe he will be able to show this cuddly side of him more often and it won’t bother his partner. The light-haired male always thought he must appear manlier, but with Ethan that wasn’t necessary and the realization made him smile back at him. Their foreheads were touching, so Aaron raised his chin a bit, bumping their noses together as he said, “Okay then,” feeling really happy, being like this.

 

 

 

 

As he honestly admitted how he felt about his first blow job, he could observe the other’s expression turn awkward and he thought he might have said too much. But the grin that appeared on his boyfriend’s face and the way he chewed his lip, as Aaron said he would prefer being warned that Ethan is coming the next time, looked a bit mischievous and the light-haired male couldn’t help but think it’s hot. His comment about women’s junk not doing anything when they cum and teasingly asking him, if there were any chances he might start enjoying this any time soon, made him burst out laughing. He found the comment funny, but at the same time he just learned something new about Ethan and it made him giddy. So his boyfriend was into this; Aaron was happy that he swallowed all of his seed down, remembering how he almost spit it out and how bad that would seem to his boyfriend. “Weeeeell, I wouldn’t say I hated it per se, I just need more practice so I would say your chances are pretty good,” he said flirtingly, surprising even himself. As he thought about it, it wasn’t something really unpleasant for him, so if his boyfriend enjoyed it, then why not? At least the other wasn’t into things like cumming all over his face, judging from the laugh that escaped him, when the light-haired male made that comment.

 

Feeling Ethan’s hand on his balls, made him sigh and his heart beat started to quicken, when the other hand joined the first, wandering over his length teasingly. In Aaron’s opinion his boyfriend took too long, teasing him, making him pant and his hips were starting to thrust into the other’s hand, wanting more friction. He soon got what he wanted, one hand starting to stroke him harder and faster, while the other stayed on his sack, squeezing and massaging his testicles. The librarian couldn’t help but think how getting a hand job from a guy, who knows exactly what feels good, is much better than getting it from a woman. Or maybe it was just this good because it was Ethan touching him. Feeling his boyfriend kiss his neck made him shiver and it wasn’t long, before he was finishing into the ginger’s hand.

 

Wanting to show he was grateful, he pressed a kiss on Ethan’s neck, needing a few moments to catch his breath and be able to speak. He was trying to stay quiet, aware that they could be heard, if someone passed by the door and he would be too loud, but it was hard keeping the moans in. Slowly unwrapping himself from the ginger, he checked the mess he just made. He usually kept some tissues in the first drawer, because the dust in here made him sneeze a lot and he awkwardly reached around the table, searching for them, before taking one for himself and offering the rest of the package to his boyfriend. He wiped the remaining sperm from his cock, before pulling up his pants and facing the ginger again.

 

He couldn’t keep the smile off his face, feeling satisfied and happy. Acts like this made him happy in general, but sharing it with the person he felt closest too, felt even better. “We should probably return to work, huh? People might start searching for me and you probably have ton of work left, don’t you? I’ll walk with you to the entrance,” Aaron said, wanting to stay like this for a while longer, but at the same time wanting Ethan to finish his work for the day as soon as possible, so they can go home. He was looking forward to spending the afternoon together.

[-Hideki-]

“I think that ‘big kid in a suit’ is probably the most accurate summery of myself I’ve ever heard, if I ever write an autobiography that’ll be the title.” Ethan responded to the teasing remark of the silver haired with a wink. “It is however true that one shall not judge a book by its cover. Facades are deceiving. And in the end they mean nothing when they are empty.” The ginger said and he meant it. How many guys who had been hot by societal standards and physically had Marco introduced to them in the bar or some club because he had wanted to fuck them later on and how often had he asked Ethan if he didn’t think they were hot, even asking him if he wanted to do a threesome with them, and the ginger had always said that he didn’t find them hot. And that had also been true. Them being dull and stupid, lowbrow and flat boring personalities had made them unattractive to him despite the looks. Sure the red head was a visual creature but when he was fapping to some porn he didn’t hear those people talk, he didn’t have to try to have even a small conversation with them so he didn’t know what was behind the façade and he could imagine those guys to be everything he wanted whereas many of Marcos hook-ups revealed just how shallow and dumb they were only speaking a few sentences what killed the attractiveness of their looks for him somehow. Stupidity was a true boner killer after all at least for him, for Marco not so much.

 

Telling the librarian that it was not Richard but Cole on the photo had the opposite effect of what the ginger had thought it would have. He had thought that the other would be relieved or glad it wasn’t Richard because Ethan couldn’t think of any other reason why the other would have such a seemingly intense antipathy against the man he didn’t now if not for the fact that he had had sex with seventeen years old Ethan when he had been in his mid-thirties. But Aaron seemed to get even madder and more displeased. It got not less confusing when Wilson explained to him that he did indeed dislike Richard but that it had nothing to do with his age and the age gap between Ethan and the other man. The ginger gave the other a questioning look, his hazel eyes looking into the other man’s face wanting to understand what bothered him. “Why do you dislike him then? If not because of the age gap?” he wanted to know.

 

His attempt to explain why he and Cole were still friends and that they really were just friends and that there was nothing to it kinda failed too. Because Aaron was now being incredibly tense and gave him an angry gaze, only growling a response, his leg even twitching when the red head had placed his hand onto the man’s knee as if he had to fight with himself to not pull the leg away. The ginger responded to that with tightening the grip on the man’s knee, making his presence even more known. “You’re mad at me.” He remarked and he didn’t quite understand why. Because of him being friends with Cole still? Because he was actually glad that Aaron showed some passion about him? He couldn’t possibly blame him for that. Couldn’t blame him that every indicator that the silver haired man was actually feeling affection and love for him made him want to jump from joy! He had been hurt by the displayed indifference and having his love not returned for years back then after all. So yes, of course the other man feeling a normal, healthy amount of jealousy when it came to his exes, feeling competitive about them made him utterly happy. He didn’t have to be as crazy possessive and territorial as Ethan was, that’d probably be too much if two people were like this but that he wasn’t indifferent to the fact that Ethan had been in love with and had had sex with those other men made him feel happy. “How can I change that?” he then asked wanting to know what he was supposed to do that the other wasn’t that displeased and angry with him anymore.

 

With a shine in his hazel eyes and a warm smile on his lips he looked at the silver haired when he told him that he felt differently for him too, more intense then for anyone else. Taking the other man’s hands into his own he smiled. “It makes me happy that you do. Maybe one day you’ll be able to tell me that you love me too, when you’re clearer about your own feelings that is.” Ethan said and he was really hoping that this day might come and now it didn’t even seem entirely unrealistic. It had always been an absurd fantasy, something he had known for sure would never happen but now it even seemed possible, what was pretty crazy if he thought about it.

 

 

 

 

There was surprise to see on his face when Aaron told him that he didn’t hate giving him a blowjob and that he actually thought that Ethan’s chances that the silver haired man would start to love cock and start to enjoy sucking him off weren’t that bad. He had not thought that when he had made that remark and he was a little sceptical if the other actually meant this or he was just joking around. “I hope you’re not joking because you’re seriously getting my hopes up right here. Never joke about sucking my cock; I tend to take cock sucking really seriously.” The ginger said in a playful, not at all serious tone. But it was a fact that it would disappoint him if in the end the other didn’t want to do this and enjoy this after all. It was feeling weird to know that Aaron usually wasn’t into dick, had considered himself straight because it rose unknown worries in him and was an odd feeling and he didn’t want that Aaron felt he had to pretend when it came to this. He wanted him to genuinely be into his cock, to crave it, to fucking adore it just as his former partners had loved his cock.

 

It didn’t take long and his boyfriend came, panting and moaning, ejaculating over Ethan’s hand that was still wrapped around the man’s cock. The ginger could feel the man’s heated lips pressing against his neck and it made his skin tingle and created a warm sensation. It was lovely but it left him wanting more. Left him with the wish to be kissed by the other properly! To have Aaron pull him into a passionate and heated battle of tongues out of his own initiative but it appeared that this would have to wait. He just hoped that the other would soon feel more natural about it and would be confident enough to show him his desire and affection more unrestrained, taking some initiative too, even though they were both men and the other still seemed partially reserved about intimacy with him due to that.

 

His eyes followed the other man when he was getting them some tissues, he took the tissues wordlessly and wiped away the cum from his hand rather quickly, throwing the tissue into the rubbish bin and when he looked up and over to Aaron again the man was smiling at him widely and he looked so happy and satisfied and this expression was definitely not restrained, it was honest and it made his heart skip a beat, made it beat faster again and only looking at that face made his cheeks heat up a little and he couldn’t help himself. So he made a step forward, grabbed Aaron by his arse and pulled him into a wild, passionate and domineering kiss, his tongue eagerly slithering around the other’s, saliva being exchanged in the process, pressing their bodies closer, his lips heatedly seeking the other man’s over and over again until his need for oxygen forced him to break it.

 

Looking into those blue eyes he panted as he listened to the writer saying that they should go back to work, that they’d be searching for Aaron and he probably had a lot to do as well. “Yes. Probably should.” He just said and although he agreed in theory he was really unwilling to, his hands squeezing those amazing arse cheeks of the other man before he brought himself to retreat from him. However on his way to the door he gave Aaron’s butt a firm slap, a cheeky grin appearing on his face.

 

Holding the door open he then took his lover’s hand – he had told him he was allowed to after all – and walked through the library holding onto it with the librarian, parading out of the library right in front of Alison and that old lady who worked there too, throwing a wide grin to both of them, saying:”Have a good day ladies.” To them before they stood in front of the library. “I’ll pick you up later then.” He told Aaron, wrapped his arms around the man’s waist kissing him gently and lovingly to say goodbye, when a car was driving past them, the driver opened the window and yelled at them out of his car:”Disgusting faggots! Go to hell you fucking homos!” And it made Ethan close his eyes for a moment and taking a deep breath to remind himself to not get mad. “Oh how I love to be back in this town.” He sarcastically remarked instead. “I hope next time he yells hateful shit at people he’ll drive his car against a tree.” He sighed. “I’ll be there as soon as I can. I’m looking forward to spending the rest of the day with you.” He told Aaron; let his hand run through his hair and disappeared in one of the taxis.

 

He couldn’t help but to feel anger within himself though as he sat in the taxi, smoking another cigarette and he had to remind himself of the great progress he had made with Aaron, about their kisses and pleasuring each other and talking and getting closer and that made him more happy than he was mad about that dumb arsehole. His work he did even faster and more concentrated than usually because he wanted to get it over with to be able to spend the rest of his time with his boyfriend. It was a great feeling. That feeling of being in love again and totally thrilled to get home from work, to want to spend every fucking minute with the man he was into. The rush was good enough that he only smoked half the cigarettes he had smoked in the morning hours.

 

At 2:30pm the door went open and Meyer stepped inside, sitting down in the office. Right, they wanted to go through that file with each other and finish what they had started the day before. However, when Jake sat down, placing his coffee mug onto the table he smiled at Ethan and then sighed. “Tom is building a house with ice cream sticks outside.” He told him and Ethan turned around looking at the man questioningly. “He’s always so lively and happy when he doesn’t have to go to school but when he has to he turns quiet and gloomy and I know they torture him. But I also don’t want to tell him he has to change and not be him anymore as that would kill his spirit too. They locked him up in his locker. And they pin him down and write ‘fag’ onto his forehead.” Jake told him and it was obvious that he was desperate and didn’t know what to do. Ethan’s eyebrows narrowed though when he heard that locker story. How many times had Jake locked him up into his locker, beaten him, stuffed Dave’s head into the toilet and flushed it, wrote faggot all over Dave’s head. “You think I’m a hypocrite right?” the blond said with a dry laugh. “Yes.” The ginger just said, no need to sugar coat anything if the kid wasn’t around, he didn’t care about Meyers feelings at all. “I understand but my kid suffers man. And I want this to stop, I want to help him.” he had an almost begging tone in his voice. “Then start to think about changing the bullies and what they have to do and not what your son has to do so that they leave him alone. Because he’s not doing anything wrong! He is fine! They aren’t! They are with whom everything is wrong!” Ethan gave him his advice. “Thanks.” Jake said but Ethan didn’t say anything back.

 

Silence followed and Ethan lightened another cigarette while Meyer drank from his coffee. “Aaron Wilson.” He said and Ethan turned around to him. “What about him?” he asked. “You actually were in love with him weren’t you? We mocked you about it but we never thought you were actually, like really gay or that you indeed felt like this about him. We just thought you couldn’t find a girlfriend because you were a nerd and a loser. But when you said you were gay yesterday, it kinda made sense. You actually loved him didn’t you?” the man was curious. “None of your fucking business Jake!” Ethan hissed. “I just want to get to know you and us to be friends.” The blond told him what motivated this conversation. “I’m not ready to be your friend Meyer.” The red head made clear. “Alright then. But Aaron, Aaron and I are friends and I care to know about what people’s intentions with him are and stuff you see.” The man said and Ethan rolled his eyes. “Yes, he is adorable, I loved him. Still do. Happy now.” he barked and there were a few second of silence between them before Jake spoke again. “He’s straight.” He said and Ethan pressed his cigarette out in the ashtray, getting up from his seat. “Where are you going?” Meyer asked confused. “Hotel. I’m leaving work earlier today.” He told him and the man looked not less confused. “But we wanted to finish this together for tomorrow.” Meyer objected and Ethan smiled. “And you will finish this for tomorrow. Alone! I just directed this task onto you. Because you work for me now. I am you boss. See you tomorrow.” The ginger said, sarcastically patting Jake’s back and leaving the office earlier.

 

Hence he decided to go and already grab his stuff in the hotel, check out and drive to the library together with his huge bag pack and the suitcase that was high enough to reach to his hips. He’d stay at least over a month after all. Upon arriving at the library he placed both at the end of the stairs that led up to the building and sat down on his suitcase texting Aaron. “I’m here earlier. Already got my stuff. Waiting for you in front of the building.” Before he put his phone away and smoked another cigarette, leaning back, looking up into the sky absent minded.

[Ayakashiu]

“Yeah, that has to most definitely be the title of your autobiography, if you ever write it,” came Aaron’s response and he was already laughing, thinking it would be funny reading that book. Although, he probably wouldn’t be laughing anymore, if his friend wrote about him. He was pretty sure he wouldn’t be a likeable character, thinking back on things with the knowledge he had now. The ginger continued talking and his words made the librarian tilt his head, looking thoughtful. “Spoken like a true philosopher. When did you get so wise?” he asked with a teasing undertone. Come to think of it, he usually didn’t even bother to find out what was under the façade. People just didn’t interest him all that much and he usually picked his partners by their looks. He was wondering, if he was really that shallow and why did he really never bother to get closer to someone.

 

He scoffed as an answer to the question, why he dislikes the older guy. It was obvious to him, but it wasn’t so with Ethan. His boyfriend was giving him a questioning look, seeming confused to what might be the reason, if not the age gap between them. “Isn’t it obvious Ethan? How could I like the guy that helped you get away from me?” The librarian sighed, ruffling his hair, not really feeling up for this conversation.

 

The grip on his knee tightened, as his boyfriend remarked that Aaron was angry with him. The comment hit home, because no matter how irrational it was, the light-haired male really was feeling that way. So when the ginger asked how he can change that, his shoulders slumped and he felt like a really shitty boyfriend. Ethan was trying to do something to make him feel better, while he didn’t even have the right to feel annoyed. It’s not like the other gave him any reason to be jealous and he didn’t even met Cole yet, to judge him like this. Thinking about it rationally, didn’t help ease the irritation he was feeling, but he pushed it down, not wanting to spend the limited amount of time they had fighting. “It’s not you who has to change anything, it’s me,” he sighed. “I’m not mad at you, I just don’t like the fact that you are still so close with someone you dated. It’s stupid, I know. I’m sorry.” He reached under the table with his own hand, putting it on top of Ethan’s and giving it a light squeeze. His boyfriend did seem protective of his friends and Aaron didn’t want to come between them, so he will need to make sure to keep his jealousy in check.

 

It was nice to hear that he was making the ginger happy, but Aaron felt contradictory feelings, as his boyfriend said he might tell him he loves him one day. On one side, he wanted to say that he does love him already, but on the other side, was that really the kind of love Ethan wanted from him? The light-haired male felt so happy, being reunited with his childhood friend and he didn’t mind that they were dating now, although it probably should come as more of a shock to him than it did. But the thought of sex and being the bottom, still terrified him. He wasn’t sure he could let anyone do that to him, even if it was Ethan, so maybe the love he was feeling really was just friendship. It was really confusing and Aaron didn’t do well with overthinking things, so he decided to just go with the flow for now and see what happens, if his feelings will change or not. But how will he know the difference between ‘platonic love’ and ‘romantic love’? Wanting to have sex probably wasn’t the only factor, since he was pretty much game for anything that didn’t involve himself getting penetrated already. He looked at the ginger curiously, before asking, “How did you know you were in love with me?”

 

 

 

 

 

Aaron made a comical wounded grimace, when his friend implied he might be joking about this. “Just so you know, I take cock sucking really serious too.” He continued with a more serious tone, not wanting the other to think he was still joking. “You should have seen yourself. If sucking you gets you to make faces like that, I’m totally into it already. Not to mention it was my first time; imagine what I will do to you, when I get better!” He couldn’t help but grin widely, suddenly very motivated to get better at this. Seeing Ethan enjoy himself that much and knowing he was responsible for it, gave him a sense of power and the rush felt really good, even if the act itself was uncomfortable. Not to mention part of that rush traveled down, directly into his cock.

 

They were quiet while they dressed and cleaned up, but Aaron grinning like an idiot made his boyfriend pull him close. Feeling Ethan’s hands on his butt was weird, not being used to it, but the intense kisses were something he was getting used to by now. It seemed his boyfriend rarely kissed slowly and gently, not that he was complaining! For some reason being kissed with abandon and so much dominance appealed to him, because he could just follow along, not having to worry if he was doing anything wrong or what the other person is thinking. So he returned the kiss with the same passion, their tongues intertwining and dancing around each other, leaving them both breathless. The light-haired male who didn’t care much for kissing before, was finding out he really enjoys the wild, messy way in which Ethan kisses him, as long as they are alone.

 

It seemed like time was flying by when he was spending it with Ethan. His suggestion to return to their work was escorted with a squeeze to his butt, making him chuckle, as his boyfriend agreed and stepped away, moving towards the door. It made Aaron feel a hint of disappointment, hoping the ginger might say he doesn’t want to go yet, making them stay in this hideaway for a while longer. A sudden slap made him yelp, his eyes opened wide with surprise as his boyfriend grinned cheekily at him. He rubbed his behind, shaking his head at the other, trying to hide a smile appearing on his lips, as he followed him out of the little room.

 

As soon as they were out, Ethan took his hand and Aaron remembered he said that was ok. He used his other hand to try and smooth his hair that was probably all over the place, pulling his sweater a little higher on his neck, trying to look normal. When they passed his coworkers at the entrance, his boyfriend grinned widely and wished both women a good day, earning a raised eyebrow from the librarian. “Well aren’t you sweet?” Alison was their classmate and if he remembered correctly, they never got along well, while Mrs. Fink was working at this library back when they were still highschoolers and they never got along well with her either, because she was so strict. So the ginger being so nice to them was out of character, but the light-haired male secretly entertained the thought he was the cause for this unusual cheerfulness.

 

When they were out, Ethan told him that he’ll pick him up later, before he leaned down and kissed him gently, wrapping him into an embrace. It was such a contrast to the other hungry kisses the light-haired male received till now, that it made him blush. They were interrupted by a passing car, the driver yelling at them hatefully, sending them to hell. It made Aaron froze, this being the first time anyone yelled at him like that. His boyfriend next to him took a deep breath and made a sarcastic remark. The librarian didn’t know what to say, since just yesterday he was telling the other things around here changed, while at the same time being stunned by the unpleasant experience. Ethan said his goodbyes, receiving only a nod and a short “Me too,” in return, before he got into one of the taxis and drove off.

 

Aaron sighed deeply, baffled by what just happened. Will it be like this everywhere they go? That would certainly be a bother, but then they could just spend most of their time at his apartment, which actually wasn’t all that bad for the light-haired male.

 

He was thinking about this when he re-entered the library, being greeted by a sight of Alison talking excitedly to Mrs. Fink, who looked displeased. When they saw him, the chattering stopped and his younger co-worker focused her attention on him, making him feel uncomfortable because he knew what she wants to know. “Aaron, that was Ethan Cornwell, wasn’t it?” she said in a sweet voice, surprising him with remembering his boyfriend’s whole name. He only nodded in reply and a smile was growing on her face as she continued, “You two seemed very close.” As she said that her gaze focused on his neck and he knew exactly what she was thinking. Putting on a polite smile of his own, he said, “Yes, we were always very close.” He didn’t bother saying anything more, knowing that half of the town will know about this when Alison gets off work. The girl was the biggest chatterbox he knew and it annoyed him, even if she didn’t mean anything bad by it. Before his younger co-worker could ask him anything more, Mrs. Fink cleared her throat, making them both look at her. “Alison, didn’t you complained just a moment ago, how much work you have left for today? And Aaron, you took quite a long break today, I expect you to stay longer if needed.” The old lady’s tone didn’t leave any room for objections and the younger girl hurried off, flushed, while he beamed a smile to his older co-worker. “I planned to put in some extra hours anyway, Mrs. Fink,” he said, forming a silent thank you with his mouth in the end, making the old lady scoff. He never saw her smile, but he was pretty sure she had a soft spot for him.

 

Grateful for the excuse to stop talking and get back to work, he returned to the fantasy department, finishing what he was doing before he was interrupted by his boyfriend. The work wasn’t really demanding, so he had lots of time to think. Still feeling shaken a bit from that rude driver, he thought about why people get so mean. They didn’t do anything to him, but he still verbally attacked them and the librarian wondered, if they are just so unhappy with themselves that they feel the need to take it out on others, or what was the reason for this kind of behaviour. The whole subject was making him feel down, so he tried to think about something else. The first thing that came to mind was Ethan’s face, mouth agape, his eyes half lidded, pleasure written all over it. He needed to stifle a groan that wanted to escape him. He wondered since when did he get so submissive and even feel the rush from it, trying to think how it was, when they were both still kids.

 

When puberty hit Aaron, it hit him pretty hard, so when he wasn’t spending time with his childhood best friend, he was chasing one girl or another. He was never a popular kid, but for some reason, girls liked him; they probably found him interesting because of the unusual color of his hair or something like that. So he never had much difficulty finding a girl, but keeping one proved to be a task for him. He got dumped frequently for the stupidest reasons, or so he thought back then, but he really didn’t put much effort into those relationships, so he couldn’t really blame the girls. The only relationship he put a lot of effort into, was with Ethan. Not that it needed a lot of effort, the light-haired male always finding it easy to be around his former friend. Now that he thought about it, he always had a laid back personality and even then he would follow Ethan’s lead. He had no problem seeing his boyfriend as the top, while he was starting to realize he might be more of a bottom himself. The picture in his brain as he tried imagining the reversed situation though, just didn’t seem right and it made him sigh dejectedly. Even as he was supposed to be giving a blow job to the ginger, it just resulted in him letting go of the reins and leaving Ethan to do as he pleases, not even minding that his mouth was getting fucked by another guy! He really loved sex, so why did he have to fit into the more uncomfortable role? His boyfriend did promise him he would make him enjoy it, but it wasn’t something that Aaron couldn’t imagine as being pleasurable.

 

What was he doing with Ethan? He felt really happy and relaxed around him, but was it really ok to just go with the flow here? They didn’t spend much time together yet, but it was clear how different they were and how differently they saw relationships. The librarian did get uncomfortable with too much affection being shown in public, while Ethan seemed like the kind of type who did what he wanted wherever he wanted. Aaron thought of himself as straight just yesterday, but since then, he did a one hundred and eighty degrees turn, not only jerking off with the person he considered his best friend, but giving him a blow job too. How far was he willing to go, before realizing his boundaries? Right now, he felt like he could do anything for his boyfriend, but at the same time, he didn’t want to bother with all the unpleasantries their relationship was bound to cause. He really will need to put effort into this, if he wanted to make it work.

 

He was so lost in his own thoughts, he didn’t notice the kids starting to circle the shelves, until a small voice sounded behind him. “Hello, Mr. Wilson.” The greeting was accompanied with the giggles from a group of girls, who frequented the library. He put on a friendly smile, as he turned around and faced five little girls, all staring at him with wide eyes. “Hello there!” he greeted back. “Did you already read all the books you took home last week?” All the girls nodded eagerly in unison, the adorable sight making his smile get bigger. Although it was usually one of his female co-workers that found books for those girls, they always came to see him and tell him how much they read. The girl who greeted him spoke again, pointing to the bruise that wasn’t covered by his sweater. “Mr. Wilson, what happened? Did you fall and hurt yourself?” She said it with such innocent voice, that the librarian started to heat up, facing five pair of eyes intensely staring at his neck, looking worried about him. He was lost for words, not knowing how to explain it, but luckily for him, another girl spoke. “My mom had the same bruise and she said she was playing with uncle when she got it! She said you must be careful when you play with boys, otherwise something like this happens.” All the girls nodded again, like they were just told something wise and Aaron smiled awkwardly. “That’s how I got it too, when I was playing with my friend.” He actually knew the girl’s mother and he was pretty sure he knew who the uncle she was playing with was too. Kids were really observant and it reminded him he needs to be careful what he says around them, hoping that they won’t tell their mothers about this. The group of girls was obviously satisfied with his answer, because they said goodbye to him, leaving him while giggling and whispering among themselves.

 

He pulled a hand through his hair as he watched them go, wishing he was as young as they were again, not having to worry about ‘adult’ problems. He was finished here, so all that was left for him, was to check what those kids from earlier wanted. He picked the list of comics from the front desk, where Alison left it for him and a smile played on his lips. Marvel comics were becoming all the rage lately and while he really loved them too, he knew the library can’t afford to get all of those on the wishlist. He sat down behind a computer to check the current prices or if he could find some used ones to buy. There were some complaints from the parents about the violence in those comics, but he made sure that they were only lent to the older kids and considering the games or movies they were watching nowadays, this was nothing.

 

His phone vibrated and he pulled it out of his pocket, observing with a mild surprise that he got a message from Meyer. The former jock was probably worried about the events that happened yesterday at the reunion and as he opened the message, there was an invitation for a drink. He quickly typed back that he has another plans for tonight, but before he could focus on his work again, there was another message, saying, “Reading books isn’t considered as having plans. Meet me at 7, the usual place, need to talk.” The last part made the librarian furrow his eyebrows and he wondered what Ethan told the former jock at work. The usual place meant the bar and it would be awkward going there looking like this. The guys would surely notice the bruises and even if they won’t think Ethan was the cause for them, it would still be bothersome explaining it. He got another message, this time from his boyfriend, telling him he was already here.

 

Checking the clock, he noticed the ginger was really early and not wanting to let him wait for too long, Aaron wrapped up his work in a hurry, leaving the work he didn’t finish for tomorrow. Picking up his things, he said goodbye to Mrs. Fink, before exiting the library and spotting his boyfriend at the foot of the stairs. Ethan was sitting on his suitcase, staring at the sky, looking lost in thought. The light-haired male approached him, standing above him he stuck his head into the other’s line of vision, meeting his boyfriend’s gaze. “Penny for your thoughts?” he said questioningly, a smile gracing his face.

 

Only a few hours passed from the break they spent together, but it seemed so long to Aaron. But now they had the rest of the day free and could do whatever they wanted. “Let’s call a taxi and get you settled. Then, let’s get something to eat because I’m starving! Do you have any whishes in particular?” he asked the ginger, not really caring himself what they will eat, as long as it makes him full. His only passion, considering food, were the cupcakes that Franciscka made and while he liked everything she baked, the banana ones were by far his favorite desert. “Oh and tell me, if there’s something you want to do. I’m fine with anything,” he added, being content with just spending time together, but then he remembered Jake’s message. Pulling his phone out, he said apologetically, “Just let me reply to Meyer. He wants to grab a drink and have ‘a talk’. I’m guessing it’s about yesterday. Or did he say anything to you today at work?” Maybe the former jock mentioned something to Ethan, since they were working together and it wasn’t about recent events at all. If it was about something else, maybe he should just postpone it to another day, not wanting to be rude and ditch the guy completely.

[-Hideki-]

Ethan leaned his head back and smirked a little smugly in regards to the other teasing him with how he sounded like a true philosopher asking him when he had gotten that wise. “I have many facets and different talents. If I had wanted to I could have totally been modern days Socrates.” The ginger said. “Isn’t it interesting though how you just realised how deep I am after all those years of knowing me?” he asked the smirk getting playful, voice teasingly. “Did you just check out my hot body all those years? How disappointing!” He said in a fake dramatic voice with a fake afflicted face before he couldn’t hold back the laugh anymore. Then again he had not often shown that side of his back in the day when he had been a teen. He had thought a lot but he had seldom discussed his thoughts and theories. The inclination to philosophise and to have in depth discussion with other people and not just with himself on his mind constantly had been awaken by Richard, already during their messages, who had taken an interest in such questions and analysing broader pictures unlike other teenagers he had known from his high-school before who would have had no interest in discussing that stuff with the ginger anyway. That had been one aspect he had liked so much about talking to the older man, a way they had connected intellectually. One could think about Richard’s life-style and his conclusions whatever one wanted but the man had actually been pretty sophisticated and smart.

 

With a blank face he blinked his hazel eyes looking at Aaron when it busted out of the other that it wasn’t even possible for him to ever like the man who had helped him to get away from him. And the red head saw many incoherencies and flaws in Wilson’s way of thinking about this issue and he let out a snort. “Are you serious?” he asked and then sighed. “Do you actually think that I would have stayed in that hellhole that was killing me inside if I had not written to Richard those years until I left for New York? Do you think he was the reason I wanted to leave all that madness behind?” he wanted to know because it made absolutely no sense to him whatsoever. “If so you’re wrong. I have saved money to run away here since middle school where I didn’t even know about his existence. I hated it here and I wanted out of this town every fucking day. Writing to Richard helped me to cope with it. And he helped me to at least stay here until I finished high-school. He encouraged me to get through it. That I just had to bear with it until then. If it weren’t for that man, I would have run away from home much earlier than I have. I would have dropped out of high-school and headed to New York without a friend and without knowing where to stay.” He explained. “If the fact that I finally escaped from this town is what you hate so much because you would have rather had me stay and be miserable all my life then Richard is the wrong address and the only one you can hate for it is me! Because it was my decision alone! He never told me to run away. He just responded that if I did, I could stay at his place for the start and that he’d not let me stand in the rain in New York alone.” he explained with an earnest expression on his face.

 

Surprised he looked into those blue eyes when the librarian responded to his question as to what he could do that he’d not be that mad at him anymore as he told him that he didn’t have to do anything, that it was him who needed to change his attitude, saying that he wasn’t mad at him but that it bugged him that he was still that close to someone he had once dated and ending with an apology, saying it was stupid. There was a slight smile playing around his lips when he could feel Aaron’s hand on his giving his a squeeze and the ginger intertwined his fingers with his. “No.” he said calmly. “It’s not stupid and believe me I get it.” He told him. “I’m happy that you feel that way about it actually. That you feel passionate enough about me to get competitive towards Cole.” Ethan let him know. “Beside that I am the last man to tell someone that their jealousy is uncalled for or stupid.” The red head laughed. “As I told you before, I am a possessive guy. I get crazy jealous when I’m in love with a man.” He let him know.

 

After he had expressed his hopes that the other would one day come to the realisation that he loved him back and would tell him so there was a moment of silence before Aaron asked him the very same question he had already asked him before and that Ethan had battled to find words for before already. “What I felt for you and hence how I noticed didn’t change since the answer I have given you to this question yesterday. I’m sorry if it was not helpful but I really can’t describe it any better than I have.” The ginger said, remembering how he had told the other how close he had felt to him, how he had felt on the same wavelength with him, how he felt he had known him since forever, that he understood him on a deep level and that he felt the other understood him (except for being gay), how he had felt at home and familiar and warm with him around, how he had wanted to spend every fucking minute of his day with him if possible, how he had been drawn to him, how he had made his heart race and then he had joked about liking the man’s arse. “If you want to know more about the physical, sexual aspect and less so the romantic, emotional one, I can tell you that too. I also wanted to touch you badly, wanted to express my feelings for you through physical affection, wanted to physically transport how much I loved and desired you, I wanted to hold you, run my hand through your hair, arouse you, witness your pleasure, be aroused and touched by you and connect my body with yours, be inside you.” He gave him that aspect now too. “Not for the purpose of just getting off, but for the intimacy of it, to strengthen our bond, our trust, to get even closer, as close as it gets.” The red head told him. It had been completely different than when he had engaged in solely sexual acts with random guys those few times, the only thing that had mattered in those had been to feel as intense pleasure as possible and get off on them and have them get off on him.

 

 

He was giving the other a coquettish grin when the man told him that he too took cock sucking really seriously. “Is that so.” The red head commented lifting up an eyebrow as he listened when the man went on about how Ethan had looked and reacted when he had sucked him off telling him he should have seen himself, raising thought to the question how it would be if he got even better at sucking cock. The ginger sucked on his bottom lip and then clicked his tongue. “I’ll pass on seeing my face when I’m about to cum, thanks.” He declined that. He really didn’t want to see himself engaging in sexual acts, especially not what faces he made because he’d probably get embarrassed if he knew how he looked getting at it and would have to think about it during sex from there on and that would be horrible. Then he chuckled though, smirking at the other who was so amazed by how pleasurable it had been for him to deep throat his partner. “If your throat get’s even tighter than that my knees might give in while I fuck your face.” The ginger jested, finding the man’s excitement about this really hilarious and cute as fuck. “You were drowning in pleasure when I let your cock penetrate my throat as well. Did your chicks never let you deep throat them? Or have you just never seen the face of a man in that situation before?” he wanted to know. That made the ginger ask himself whether they showed the men’s bodies and facial expressions when they got a blowjob or had sex in hetero-porn or if they solely showed the chicks sucking cock or getting fucked. Then he realised he had never seen hetero-porn and he didn’t want to do it just to figure that out either.

 

After Ethan had demonstratively took the other’s hand and demonstratively been incredibly nice addressing both of the women in the library at least the second part didn’t stay unnoticed by the silver haired man as he commented with a sarcastic ‘Aren’t you sweet’ and the ginger smiled widely and spoke with a joyful voice when he turned his head to Aaron. “I can’t stand those wenches. Especially Alison!”

 

 

 

 

He didn’t have to wait long until Aaron appeared outside of the library. Ethan had just taken a deep pull on his cigarette and was about to let it out again when suddenly the other man’s face appeared right before his leading to the man standing in a cloud of smoke together with Ethan. He ignored the remark about his thoughtfulness and mumbled a ‘Sorry’ in regards to the smoke. Looking up into the man’s eyes he wanted Wilson to kiss him, he wanted to be greeted with a kiss, he could do it again and kiss him but he took the initiative all the time. Would the silver haired just not do anything if he didn’t kiss him? Would he be fine without touching him or exchanging any affection? How depressing. Then he remembered the homophobic driver arsehole and he thought that maybe while being in that dumb town they should be a bit more cautious when it came to relationships and the idea didn’t exactly get his mood up again.

 

Listening to the other when he said that they should call a taxi to get back to Aaron’s place and then grab something to eat Ethan nodded and rose from his suitcase, standing on the stairs, calling for a taxi over that app he had with just a few clicks. “We could go to the bowling place. They have an integrated shitty fast food place there.” He suggested. “Or we might go to that Chinese restaurant where they had all those old acarde games and that aquarium with the kois.” Ethan gave the other two ideas, not really having a preference.

 

He raised an eyebrow though when he heard that the other man had to text back Meyer because their good old schoolyard bully wanted to talk with Aaron about something at the bar. Ethan made an annoyed face because Jake was the root of that heavy unpleasant feeling inside of his chest. Telling him that Aaron was straight that clearly, with such a finality to it, without leaving any room for doubt, for question. It had felt like the other had emptied out some soda in his face again and he had, unsurprisingly, never been in a good mood when one of that lowlifes had thrown soda into his face. It had been icky and sugary, feeling like glue and the carbonic acid had hurt in his eyes like hell.

 

The sigh that came from him wasn’t less annoyed and there was a stern expression on his face when the other was so casually talking about it and asking him if Meyer had said anything at work. “Your best friend Jake Meyer just wants to warn you that a certain gay guy has the hots for you and that your supposedly incredibly straight arse is in huge danger.” He told him with a grim face, but talking with a casual tone of voice, taking his suitcase and the bag from the stairs when he saw the taxi arrive and he was approaching the vehicle, turning his face to Aaron as he was putting his luggage into the car trunk. “Just tell him that you already know and you’ll wear armour around your arse as protective gear whenever you’re around me from now on and he should be relieved.” He said dryly and cynically, slamming the trunk close. “If he isn’t, we can just get my luggage into your apartment, go to the market, by some food, I cook for us, we eat and you can go meat up with him. Maybe he also wants to nag about me making him work longer today. I could read one of your books in the meantime.” The red head suggested a third alternative how they could spend the day.

 

Sitting in the taxi Ethan didn’t let any space between them. He deliberately sat right next to Aaron and although he would have felt better especially after hearing how exclusively straight the other supposedly was again if the librarian had actually touched him and searched closeness to him on his own account, he laid his arm around the silver haired, pulling him against his torso. He craved reassurance and touch right now, he wanted to feel the other man’s affection and passion to prove what Meyer had said wrong so he reached out the other hand, grabbed a hold of Aaron’s jaw and turned his face to face his own, pulling the man into a deep, demanding, devouring kiss, his lips and tongue greedily craving the other’s. The ginger had his eyes closed so he didn’t see how the driver was making a disgusted grimace but having at least that bit of professionalism to keep his opinions to himself.

[Ayakashiu]

Seeing Ethan get all smug, saying he could easily be a modern day Socrates, made Aaron smile. Not because he would disagree with him, but because looking so pleased with himself suited him and the light-haired male couldn’t help but find it hot. The teasing question that came afterwards and the exaggerated dramatics made him laugh out loud and he wiped away an imaginary tear. “Of course, I could only think of sex back then, so I only cared about your body,” he teased back, but there was a grain of truth in there. While he wouldn’t say his former friend was a philosopher, because he didn’t remember him ever wanting to discuss such topics, it didn’t come as a big surprise either. “But it seems like you wanted to have an intellectual discussion with me instead. Maybe we could do that when we come home, instead of others, more carnal activities.” Now the librarian was the one smirking, because if he would have to choose, he would go for the latter. While it was interesting to discuss certain topics, he was still just a man.

 

Hazel eyes were staring blankly at his azure blue ones, before his boyfriend snorted and went on to explain how Richard was the one who helped him cope with every horrible day spent here and how the man convinced him to finish high-school, before offering him a safe haven when he left. Really, what did Ethan expect? That he would be thrilled hearing how his best friend poured his soul to another guy he never even met, while he didn’t even say a word to Aaron? Also leaving without a word, like he didn’t even care what happens to the light haired male? Aaron couldn’t help but think how unfair this was, since hurting the other was the last thing on his mind. But Ethan left because he hated it here, he decided not to say anything about his feelings, because it would hurt him too much, if those feelings wouldn’t be returned and Aaron wondered where he himself was in all this? Did his former friend even consider how it might influence him? Give a thought to his feelings? Or could he only think about himself back then? “Fine, the guy is a saint, can we stop talking about him now?” he said sarcastically, feeling stupid letting himself get hurt over this and not wanting to hear Ethan talk about another guy in this manner.

 

The ginger telling him that he gets it, even being happy about it, made Aaron feel even shittier. He just said he needed to change his attitude, but pushing the unwanted feelings aside and deciding to act like he wasn’t feeling irritated, wasn’t changing it, it was lying about it. But if it made Ethan happy, was it so bad to lie about it? His boyfriend even laughed, saying how crazy possessive he himself could get and it made the light-haired male think. He never remembered the other acting like that around him. “You said you love me, but I don’t remember you getting crazy jealous or act possessive around me,” he said, moving the focus of the conversation away from himself and onto the ginger.

 

Aaron listened intently, remembering parts of the talk they had yesterday and how he realized he was feeling the same. But this time his boyfriend explained the other aspect of his feelings and it made the librarian’s cheeks heat up, listening to it. It was weird being told things like this and at the same time the light-haired male started to realize that his own feelings can’t really compare to the other’s. He wasn’t sure he could say the same things, because he didn’t give much thought to how he was actually feeling yet. The answer wasn’t helpful, so he tried asking it differently, “Okay, but when was the moment you realized the feelings you had for me, went from friendship to love? Because it’s not like it was love at first sight, right?” The light-haired male really wished he could know what exactly was he feeling towards the ginger. Was it love or what exactly was it?

 

 

 

Hearing his boyfriend click his tongue and pass on seeing himself as he’s nearing an orgasm, made the light-haired male chuckle. But he did feel kind of smug, hearing Ethan say his knees might give up, if his throat gets even tighter. The next sentence made him recall the blow job he received last night and drowning in pleasure was a spot on description of what he was feeling then. He was asked two questions and they both seemed surprising to him. “Most of the girls aren’t really so keen on even giving a blow job, while others do it, but only after a lot of convincing, so it seemed like too much bother for me to deal with that,” he shrugged, not wanting to go into more detail. “And no, I definitely never saw a face of another man in this situation and I really don’t want to either, to be honest.”

 

 

 

The timing he chose to stick his face in front of Ethan’s, couldn’t be worse. He found himself in a cloud of cigarette smoke and it made him cough, because he incidentally inhaled some of it. A mumbled sorry he got from his boyfriend made him frown and say disgruntledly, “This really is a nasty habit.” The way his boyfriend just looked at him, made him feel a bit uncomfortable and he got the feeling the other wasn’t really in a good mood to begin with. Aaron concluded it was probably due to having worked the whole day and being tired.

 

To his question about having any whishes about food, Ethan replied with two suggestions, seemingly fine with either. Aaron thought about the bowling place and how there’s bound to be some people there that his boyfriend doesn’t care to see, so he opted for the second suggestion. “Chinese sounds good to me!”

 

Bringing up Meyer seemed to be a mistake though, because the ginger suddenly looked very annoyed. So something must have happen at work and if Aaron wasn’t so clueless, he might piece it together sooner. He wanted to bite his tongue for asking the question about the former bully, but it was too late. Ethan was already replying, as their taxi arrived and he headed towards it with his bags. The light-haired male wanted to offer to help, but the other seemed to not need it and the only answer he could muster to what he was just told, was, “He’s not my best friend.” He wanted to make a joke about chastity belts, when hearing Ethan’s suggestion what he should write to Jake, but the way the ginger slammed the trunk close made him stay quiet, thinking it might not be a good idea to joke right now. He listened on, as his boyfriend said he can cook for them and then Aaron can go meet up with Meyer. As much as seeing Ethan get all domestic and cook for him appealed to the light-haired male, he would feel bad making him do that after what seemed like an exhausting day at work. “Let’s just stick with Chinese for today and you can cook some other day,” he said softly, as he followed his boyfriend into the taxi, wisely avoiding mentioning the former jock again.

 

As they got settled and told the driver where to go, Aaron started typing on his phone again, wanting to write up a reply to Meyer that would get the guy off his back about the whole ‘talk’ thing, at the same time finding out what exactly happened that got the ginger so riled up. Jake Meyer was one of the rare people that never commented on his relationships or force his own opinions about this matter onto Aaron, so it was hard to imagine the guy being worried about his ass. Not that he was all that observant when it came to people. But his boyfriend sat right next to him, wrapping an arm around him and pulling him close. The position was a bit awkward, the taxi driver sitting right in front of them, so the light-haired male tried thinking of a subtle way to move away a bit, but then a hand grabbed his jaw, turning his head and Ethan’s lips were on his, his tongue forcing its way into Aaron’s mouth, greedy and demanding. He was frozen for a moment, his eyes wide open, because he told his boyfriend how uncomfortable this makes him and the other still did it, before he pushed the ginger away, forcefully ending the kiss.

 

His face was flushing red, as he noticed the driver’s grimace with the corner of his eyes and he couldn’t remember the last time he felt so embarrassed. There was hurt in his eyes, mixed in with the awkwardness of the situation, Aaron thinking his boyfriend will respect his reservations about acts like this in public. He wasn’t sure what to say right now, because the taxi suddenly seemed very small, the driver being able to hear anything they say and he didn’t want that. So he changed the directions, telling the driver his home address, not really feeling like eating out anymore after this, before turning back to Ethan and explaining, “Maybe it’s best if we order take out and talk at home.” The drive to his apartment only took a few minutes and then they could talk in private.

[-Hideki-]

It made him laugh how the other man was saying that he certainly had only cared about his body back then, it was hilarious because it could not have been any further off the reality since Aaron had not been physically interested in the red haired male in the slightest as teenagers and even now as adults it was still Ethan who was drooling over the other man’s body and not so muc vice versa. There was a wide grin on his face when the other remarked how the ginger apparently wanted to have an intellectual discussion with him suggesting doing that when they got home instead of being physical with each other. It made him snort and he shaking his head. “That’s not how it works.” Cornwell stated. “It usually works like this: We pour some drink, sit on the sofa, discus some deep shit, get all riled up in theories and gather new insights and ideas and while doing so we’ll get all horny for each other and end up fucking like rabbits without further ado .” He told him with a dirty smirk and in a playful voice but regardless of that playfulness many nights of his with former boyfriend’s had looked just like that. “Smart men turn me on you see, can’t help it.” He winked.

 

Cornwell rolled his eyes at the sarcastic remark. “No silly, ‘the guy’ is far from a saint.” He said. “That’s not even the fucking point. The point is that he helped me a lot. That he actually knew what I was going through and he could relate to me and give me advice in my situation because he was gay too alright! I knew he got it, I knew he wouldn’t judge me and that I didn’t have in this entire fucking town, especially not from a straight man who was not deemed an abomination by this town and his parents and if you don’t get that I can’t help you.” The ginger said and crossed his arms in front of his chest. “Now we can stop talking about him.” Ethan ended.

 

“You didn’t remember because you didn’t pay close enough attention and I was keen on not showing it at the same time.” Ethan told Aaron when the silver haired male remarked that he didn’t remember having seen the red head crazy jealous and possessive over him although the ginger said he had loved him. “I hated every single girlfriend or crush of yours with a passion, even every girl you undressed with your eyes. I wanted them to get thrown from a cliff or drown in the fucking lake so much did I hate them. But I had to stay friendly to them and not let it show in front of you so no one would think I behaved odd or would get behind the reason as to why I hated every single one of your girls. I also thought, as I told you plenty of times before now, that you’d be disgusted if you figured out I was attracted to you and that I wouldn’t have a chance in a million years anyway, what would have made any displayed possessiveness completely useless and just destructive, so I tried hard to swallow all those feelings and impulses down.” The ginger told him. “Besides, you already witnessed my jealousy now, when I made that remark about Jenny that made you mad where I told you that I have made that remark because thinking you still find her attractive and are friends with her makes me crazy jealous, remember.” The man explained.

 

A small laugh came from him when the man asked when he had realised his feelings for him since it wasn’t like it was love at first sight. “When we first met we were way too fucking young to understand the concept of romantic love and attraction.” The ginger said and sighed. “I realised that I was in love with you in middle school.” The ginger said directly, nothing more to say about it.

 

 

 

It made him laugh dryly and it gave rise to his worries again when the other said that he had never seen the face of another man in that situation before and that he actually didn’t want to. “And yet you did now.” Ethan reminded. “And found it attractive enough to get a boner.” He said and sighed. “It’s odd really.” The red head found and shook his head. “I’m another man Aaron.” He reminded. “To hear you say this after what we did now is just ….weird. That you still don’t want to see a man in pleasure that is.” the ginger couldn’t help but to express that thought.

 

 

 

He was perfectly fine with the Chinese restaurant and to Aaron saying he wasn’t Meyer’s best friend the ginger snorted. “Right! Does he know that? Because he says something else!” he remarked finding it interesting that this part was apparently the only part the other had caught onto, not caring about anything else of what he had told him and the tight, clenching feeling he got from it, should get even worse in the taxi. His need for being shown that it wasn’t how Meyer had said, that the other was feeling affection for him, that the other would desire him and want to be with him, wasn’t ashamed of being seen with him got completely disappointed. Instead Jake Meyer was probably completely, perfectly right in the end and whatever this had been had been the silver haired desperately trying to be okay with that kind of touch although he was really not just to be friends again like in the old day what he wanted so badly.

 

It hurt. It hurt so fucking bad that he couldn’t breathe for a moment after the other had forcefully pushed him away, really clearly, without any doubt and Cornwell was retreating like a beaten dog, picking up the pieces of his shattered pride as he moved as far away from the other man as he probably could, leaving as much space between them as possible, not looking at him at all but staring out of the window. That was all he had needed to know! Apparently the other had now realised he didn’t actually want this after all. Better sooner than later huh? Hurt awfully anyway and he felt like someone had parked their fucking car on his chest. His face was blank, his eyes were pained and stared outside and he just wanted to trash everything and fucking scream as loud as he could to make that feeling go away because this definite rejection was too fucking painful. He was an idiot. A complete idiot for having even tried this! He should have known better. And he did know better. He had avoided guys who considered themselves straight but went to mess with men like the plague because they all were the fucking plague in one way or the other. And now Ethan had caught the plague. Why had he been that stupid?

 

Shaking his head about himself slightly he wanted to tell the driver to change the direction back to the hotel but Aaron was faster changing the direction to his place before he heard the other talk about not wanting to eat out anymore and that they could order food and talk at home. “Better plan. You go do whatever you want and I will order myself another taxi and get back into the hotel.” He said not moving his face an inch still. “There is nothing left to say. You made yourself painfully clear right now. You are straight or at least you want others to think that, go for it! But stop messing with me because you want your good old days of ‘friendship’ back which weren’t so good for me or because you’re horny or whatever.” He yelled. “You can go and talk to Meyer and can make up some shit, tell him I tried to harass you and my satanic gay voodoo messed with your brain for a moment and you were just so able to escape and then tell him how straight you are! He’ll break my nose tomorrow and I can go home and my company will send someone else, someone straight.” Ethan hissed and then said nothing anymore and ignored Aaron.

 

He lit another cigarette and then pulled out his phone opening the group chat his group of friends had and typed because he needed to hear from those people who cared about him and loved him and were like his family for him.

+++Second day in that shithole and I can’t wait to get home again. God, I hate it here. Rescue me! ----_____-----“ +++

 

+++Think about that party I’m gonna throw for you bro ;] There will be the hottest guys and they’ll all be there for you! +++

That one was from Marco and it made Ethan chuckle.

 

+++ You’re not talking about a certain police man named Brody are you? Lol +++

 

+++Now you ruined the surprise man +++

 

Shortly after Elayn send a picture of her and her wife holding the goldfish bowl saying ‘Can’t wait to have you back’ on it, that Ethan was staring at for a while until a new message popped up which was from Cole.

 

+++ If those lunatic Jesus freaks get too awful, give me a call and I’ll literally come to your rescue with a six pack of beer, potato chips and my Xbox ;] Just one call sweetie and I’ll be there =3 +++

 

All those responses made the ginger smile widely and the heavy feeling on his chest and the tension was at least easing somewhat and he didn’t feel like running rampage anymore, about to explode. When then Jonas spammed the chat with Drag Race gifs and memes Ethan couldn’t help but to laugh as he typed back.

 

+++ Thanks guys! Love you all! You’re the best

 

 

When the uncomfortable drive in the taxi was finally over he got his suitcase and his bag out of the trunk and placed them next to a wall on which he sat down, calling another taxi over the app, trying hard to ignore Aaron completely and to not look at him. It still hurt. It hurt badly. Maybe he deserved being hurt like that for being this dumb and actually getting involved with him again. For hoping that maybe he could love him after all. Loving a straight guy was toxic as fuck; it’d pull you into a fucking black hole to get completely lost there. He ran his hand over his face and sighed and lit another cigarette but he still had that lump in his throat and he was restless and the place on his body where the other man had placed his hands to push him away seemed to burn and pain him too because he could still feel it. He felt the rejection emotionally and physically and he wanted nothing more than to go home again where he was loved and not rejected.

[Ayakashiu]

His teasing was dismissed by his boyfriend saying, it doesn’t work like that and Aaron rose an eyebrow questioningly, waiting to hear how it usually works. What he heard made him chuckle, trying to imagine them in a situation like that. He didn’t want to focus on ‘fuck like rabbits’ part, because he was still not ready to go there, but thinking how cozy it would be to lounge around, discussing literature. But the librarian doubted his boyfriend had literature on his mind, when he said ‘deep shit’, which was a shame, really. Ethan’s comment about smart men turning him on, made him grin as he replied, “Good thing I’m so sophisticated then, being a writer and all. Because I was starting to worry you only want me for my body.”

 

Ethan rolled his eyes at him and for a moment Aaron felt so pissed, he was ready to stand up and leave. Because he obviously didn’t get the ginger and judged him, so what was he doing with him anyway? Getting all riled up from just hearing his boyfriend talk about that person fondly. The other crossed his arms on his chest in a defensive gesture, as he said they can stop talking about his ex now and it made the light-haired male frown at him, but he kept his comments to himself. “Good,” was the only word he planned to utter about this matter, closing it. It was a topic they will most likely never see eye to eye on, so it was best to avoid it in the future.

 

“Okay, that makes sense,” Aaron said, thinking how it would be weird to everyone, if his former friend hated all the girls he went out with, but still feeling slightly surprised about what he just learned. Wishing someone to get thrown off a cliff or drowned seemed a bit too much, but then he remembered how his boyfriend talked about Jenny yesterday. It bothered him, because he didn’t think there was a need to be so rude to someone and to think that the ginger felt the same about every girl he has ever been with…that was a lot of girls to hate. Best not to let his boyfriend know about everyone he dated, because the ginger was bound to run into a lot of his exes around here. What bothered him the most about what he just heard, was that his former friend thought Aaron would hate him, because of his feelings. “I really wish you wouldn’t think I would hate you, if you told me about your feelings back then. I would probably be baffled, but I don’t think I could ever hate you for something like that. So just talk to me about this things now, okay? You know I’m slow and I usually don’t notice things like that.” The light-haired male thought he really has it bad, if he said to someone he was dating that he wants to talk about their feelings.

 

Hearing that his boyfriend realized he’s in love with him in middle school, made him only nod thoughtfully. That still seemed early to him, but at least the ginger needed some time to realize his own feelings back then, so Aaron will probably get to know better about his too, as the time passes.

 

 

 

Aaron disagreed with his boyfriend that it was odd how he didn’t want to see another guy making pleasurable faces. This was Ethan he was seeing, not some random guy. “I found you attractive enough to get a boner, not just another guy, Ethan. I want to see you in pleasure and I don’t think it’s odd. I thought you would be happy hearing that you are the only one I feel like that about.” The light-haired male didn’t want to see the ginger sigh or shake his head in that manner, like he was worried about it, he wanted to make him happy this time around.

 

 

 

When he said they weren’t best friends, the ginger snorted and the way he asked, if Meyer knows that too, seemed like he was being mocked to Aaron. Now he was really curious what happened between these two at work. He also cursed the former jock for getting Ethan in such a bad mood, ruining the peaceful afternoon Aaron was hoping to have with his boyfriend. But maybe after they eat and get home, where they will be alone, Ethan’s mood will get better.

 

But his hopes went down the drain, when his boyfriend kissed him and he pushed him away. The ginger retreated into the farthest corner, not even looking at him anymore and it made Aaron feel a pang of regret that he reacted so suddenly. When he said they should talk at home, his boyfriend just said he has a better plan, which was him returning to his hotel. It made the light-haired male frown and murmur with a strained voice, “What are you talking about?” Did Ethan really just plan to return to staying in the hotel, because Aaron didn’t want to kiss in public? It seemed exaggerated to him, but then his boyfriend burst out, yelling at the light-haired male to stop messing around with him and how he should tell Meyer he was harassed, so the former bully will punch Ethan and he would be able to return home. The sudden outburst left the librarian speechless, not understanding how refusing one kiss could bring this on.

 

His boyfriend having said everything he planned to say, then started to type on his phone, ignoring him and it made Aaron pissed. The ginger even chuckled, like he wasn’t just hissing at him a moment ago. The light-haired male looked away, seething inside, but he refused to have this discussion in the taxi. Not to mention his eyes were watering, still trying to process what was just thrown in his face, so he didn’t trust himself to speak.

 

First, he couldn’t believe Ethan was so quick to give up, when the first real disagreement occurred. It was just a kiss and as far as Aaron was concerned, his boyfriend can kiss him the whole afternoon if he so wishes, when they come home. But obviously for the ginger, refusing the kiss was a statement of Aaron being straight and was just messing with him because he was horny. Hearing that hurt, especially after what happened earlier today in the library. The light-haired male agreed to dating and gave his boyfriend a blow job, which he would never do for another guy and not even for most girls, in terms of going so far out of his comfort zone. And if one of his exes would be all over him like this, he would be the one breaking it up, because he just wasn’t good at dealing with so much affection. And to top it all off, his boyfriend even suggested that he should make up a story how he was harassed, like he needed an excuse and didn’t agree to this by his own free will! Aaron wasn’t sure what part hurt him the most, but he was focusing on gulping down his tears, not wanting to believe Ethan would just cut him off, when they weren’t even together for one whole day.

 

To redirect the anger he was feeling, he started typing furiously on his phone too, sending a message to Jake. “What the fuck happened with Ethan and you today?? Did you say something weird to him?!” The smoke from the cigarette his boyfriend was smoking, filled the small space and made it hard for the light-haired male to breathe. He shot an annoyed look at the ginger, just to notice how he was smiling widely, then shortly after burst out laughing. It only added to Aaron’s irritation, at the same time making him feel like a puppy that was just abandoned by the side of the road. He wanted to know who Ethan was talking to right now, wanted to shake him so he would stop staring at his phone and looked at him instead. But he didn’t do anything of the sort, because they finally arrived.

 

He quickly pushed some money into the driver’s hands, not even bothering to wait for his change, rushing out of the car. Ethan was already pushing his luggage next to a wall, sitting down and pointedly ignoring him. The light-haired male stood in front of him a few moments, willing him to look up, but his boyfriend just sighed and lit up another cigarette. It seemed like they will have to do this in public, because the ginger didn’t seemed inclined to get inside, his taxi probably already on the way.

 

Aaron tugged at his hair, annoyance clear in his voice when he spoke, “You were all over me a moment ago, but now you won’t even look at me? Because of one kiss?” It felt like a dam was about to break inside of him, spilling all of his feelings, all of the anger, his fears of being left behind again, the hurt he went through once again, just that this time it would be far worse than back then. “If anyone else acted like this, I would turn around and not even spare them another look,” he hissed, anger being the strongest of his feelings right now. “I told you how uncomfortable I was with doing things like this in public and now you’re acting like a little kid, because I refused to do it?! And what’s with you saying how I made myself perfectly clear and that I should stop messing with you? Who’s messing with who here?! Do you think this is a game for me? That I agreed to date another guy, doing all that stuff just for kicks?!” He was already yelling and he needed a moment to regain his composure, looking up in the sky and taking in a deep breath. “I don’t get it, I really don’t. Was it that guy that yelled at us from his car? Or did Meyer say something that got you so riled up? If so, just tell me about it, don’t take it out on me! I can’t believe you wouldn’t even talk to me.” Aaron could feel tears gathering in his eyes again and he hated himself for being such a crybaby. He felt his phone vibrate in his pocket, probably Jake replying to his message but he ignored it. Not wanting Ethan to see him crying, he was starting to get desperate, so he burst out, “Is it the fact I don’t wanna kiss such a problem?! You want to parade me around the town like a trophy, showing everyone that we’re together, is that it?! Fine! If that’s so important to you, then fuck it, just kiss me wherever you like.” Aaron stepped forward, pulling the cigarette his boyfriend was smoking, throwing it away, before he leaned down, grabbing his face with both hands and kissed Ethan the way the guy kissed him before. Hard, demanding, pouring himself into it, as his lips crashed with the gingers, his tongue trying to gain entrance into the other’s mouth. He couldn’t stand Ethan ignoring him, so if this was what it takes to make the ginger look at him, he was willing to do it, but the fact terrified him.

[-Hideki-]

Busting out into laughter his hazel eyes looked into Aaron’s when the man told him that it was good that he was a sophisticated writer because he had gotten the feeling that the red head had only liked him for his body. “If you got that feeling you need to learn to listen more properly.” The ginger said. “As I have told you really clearly and directly what it was that made me fall in love with you and how I feel about you.” He said rather seriously although the initial remark had been teasingly. He just wanted the other to be clear about that. “Although I certainly am horny for your body too.” He stated and there was no denying that aspect because the librarian’s body was certainly turning him on.

 

Ethan smiled slightly and closed his eyes for a moment when the silver haired expressed how it bothered him that Cornwell had feared the other judging him and hating him, finding him disgusting if he had known he had been gay and had had a crush on him back then. “I know. You told me already.” The man said. “I’m sorry but given the circumstances the chances that you would have hated me had seemed really high and there also was an existential risk to coming out to anyone, as I have explained to you yesterday.” He explained. “However I know now that you are fine with me being gay. And I won’t hide my feelings from you anymore.” The ginger told him and took the man’s hand into his.

 

 

 

Apparently Aaron didn’t get what he had been trying to say as to why he had found it odd when the other had said he didn’t want to see another man in pleasure now either. “Yes, you got aroused by seeing me in pleasure! I know Aaron. But I am another man! You are a man, I am another man, you got hard from causing me pleasure and seeing my expressions.” The red head told him. “That makes the expression of aversion to seeing a man in this situation and to rule out to find anything appealing about it really weird to me.” He tried to explain what he had meant. “And of course I’m happy that I am the only man you feel for what you feel for me, certainly, but I also don’t want you to feel like that about women. But you didn’t say you wouldn’t want to see a woman’s face in pleasure, or you only ever wanted to see my face in pleasure, you said you didn’t want to see a man’s face in pleasure. “the red head stated. “Aside from that, it’s also normal for monogamous people to watch porn and get turned on by it or to see someone and to find them hot. I mean, we have eyes obviously. But that alone is not a problem. As long as you feel like you only want to do it with me and only love me, if you understand what I mean.”

 

 

 

 

Sitting on the wall he had hoped that Aaron would just let him sit there and disappear in his apartment but he didn’t. The silver haired male was standing in front of him and he was staring at him and it only made his organs clench worse and he felt like the other man’s eyes were burning holes into his skin as if someone was pressing their cigarettes out on it. He took a deep pull staring at the taxi app, still not looking up when he was suddenly screamed at and the other was exploding right in front of him. The ginger didn’t look up to him regardless. But he was shaking his head when the other blabbered something of having been all over him and now ending it over a kiss, as it showed how he wasn’t getting it, how he was not getting it at all. This wasn’t worth commenting on though, so he stayed silent.

 

Wilson however didn’t and he went on talking about public kissing and how that was making him uncomfortable and how Ethan was now acting stubborn because of his views on PDA. What the actual fuck did PDA have to do with anything though? “Ridiculous.” He remarked seemingly calm but inside he was boiling and hurting and if he looked how he felt blood would be running out of every pore on his skin now. “It’s not about PDA. Don’t try to make it about that.” the man spoke, not looking at the other still, focussing on the app, drumming his fingers against the phone, constantly looking at how the taxi he had ordered was getting closer. “Aside from that, your feelings about PDA seem to be completely arbitrary and fluid. How am I supposed to know how you really feel about it in that certain situation because you seem to change your opinions on it like other people their underwear. First you act all coy and uncomfortable about it, in the next moment you dig your fucking finger into my cupcake and go all sexual in the middle of a library in front of your colleagues and pull me into the next room. Really clear message right there. Not to mention that we weren’t in a public place but a taxi we rented, it was not in the middle of the fucking Times Square.” He said his voice sounding tired and dry. “But deep inside you know that it had nothing to do with ‘being uncomfortable about PDA’. Because had that been so you could have just not returned the kiss and said ‘Not here’ or whatever and didn’t have to f.o.r.c.e.f.u.l.l.y. push me away as if I was about to sexually assault you, as if I was a bloody disgusting predator straight Aaron would never even think about kissing voluntarily.” He hissed shaking his head another time. “But it doesn’t matter anyway. You don’t have to worry that anyone might see you affectionately with another man or might condemn you or find you as disgusting as me anymore and can get yourself some woman again, turning the lights out in your bedroom, fucking her through a hole in your blanket missionary style how it’s Bible approved!”

 

Apparently the other wasn’t through with his rant though and he pulled on his cigarette another time, the taxi on his app seemed to be stuck in traffic. “No.” he said when the other asked him whether he thought he’d agree to date another man for the kicks of it. “I think you might have agreed to date another guy because I told you that I can’t and won’t be your platonic friend and you just can’t let go of what you have once seen us as what you want to have back at all costs, no matter what. So you’re trying it that way while in reality this is not what you want - how we have seen at this intense rejection in the taxi - , what makes you feel ashamed in front of others and your new friends such as Jake.” He explained one theory he had.

 

Still not looking at the other, wishing the taxi would get there already he heard Aaron getting calmer expressing how he didn’t get it, wanting to search the reason at other people’s addresses, both the homophobe’s and Meyer’s. “No and no.” the red head said. “I have gotten yelled at by homophobic people before. If the environment is safe enough I usually start to make out even more in front of them, to protest their hateful shit and to not give in to them.” He explained. “It was your clear statement of rejection. It just proved what Meyer clearly said to me. ‘He’s straight’ and even if you aren’t really 100% straight, what you probably aren’t, that’s what you wish to be seen as and want to be. And if that’s so, I’m beating a dead horse. Not to mention that it hurts like fucking hell to get pushed away by someone you’re in love with as if I was sexually assaulting you, that you needed to defend yourself and forcefully fight me off, that you are too ashamed of kissing me where anyone can see it, that you will never claim me or be proud of our relationship.”

 

He couldn’t help but to roll his eyes when the other was talking about PDA again, then making ‘showing him off like a trophy’ out of the PDA and getting all riled up again and he tapped his fingers against his phone more restlessly, staring at the screen and he finally saw that the taxi only was ten meters away, so he just wanted to stand up from his place when the other man was stepping closer towards him and in the next moment his cigarette was pulled out of his mouth angrily and flung away without a warning. His eyes widened, then a frown was to see on his face when he looked up at the librarian displeased. “What the fuck is wrong wit…..” but he never got to finish the sentence when he felt the other man’s hand grabbing his face as the writer leaned down and kissed him. Kissed him hard, demandingly, angrily and forcefully and the ginger was feeling it in his entire body. Yes, he had wished for the other man to finally kiss him on his own initiative but he had wished it to be much less angry. But when he felt that tongue prodding his lips wanting entrance into his mouth, Ethan’s hand grabbed the man by the neck, pulled him down and closer, automatically kissing him back, opening his mouth for him letting his tongue slip inside, indulging into the kiss, his tongue fighting with the other man’s tongue for dominance, kissing him back eagerly, more challengingly, the whole kiss getting all messy as he was aiming to overtake it.

 

It had robbed his breath and he was slightly panting when they parted lips after their wild battle of tongues and Ethan’s dick was already getting hard again and he wanted to fuck that whole issue out. That would not happen though because Aaron was afraid of anal sex. So maybe they had to talk it out because there was still stuff left to talk about. “My new taxi driver has seen you doing gay things to me in public Aaron. And what will Meyer say about how straight you are now?” he couldn’t help but to provoke the man a little but there was a slight smirk reappearing on his face, his heart racing like crazy, the rock lifted from his chest and fire to see in his hazel eyes. So he just stood. “I won’t hide Aaron. I can’t hide who I am or who I love again. I have been there and I won’t ever go back.” He told him seriously then he went over to the taxi driver without his luggage, gave him some money and sent him away. Walking back to his stuff he grabbed both the bag and the suitcase and nodded into the direction of the buildings door. “Let’s go inside.” The ginger said.

[Ayakashiu]

“Oookaaay,” Aaron said, a bit baffled at where this was going, as his boyfriend said they were both men and that the light-haired male just got hard from pleasuring him. He didn’t get the other’s explanation, why this is weird, but did it really matter? Ethan went on, pointing out how Aaron only said he doesn’t want to see another’s guy face, while not mentioning women. “I do feel like I only want to do it with you, Ethan,” he said reassuringly, after his boyfriend finished talking. That was all that mattered in the end, even if he didn’t quite get the others doubts, he was certain about this.

 

 

 

When Aaron started to speak, Ethan still didn’t grace him with looking up, staring at his phone while the light-haired male’s voice became louder and more upset. The only reaction he got at first was his boyfriend shaking his head and it made him furious. Can’t he at least look at him?

 

The first response he got from his boyfriend was just one word, ridiculous. So that was what his former friend thought of him, of what he has to say. But it seemed that now that the ginger started to talk, he had more he wanted to say. He pointed out how Aaron was being inconsistent, flirting with him at the library and it was all true. That was out of character for the librarian, who usually wasn’t a flirt. He also found the comment about how he can find another woman to fuck completely unnecessary. So the problem for his boyfriend was that he was supposedly straight, but the gender of his partner had nothing to do with his reaction! Everything Ethan had to say came back to him being straight or at least wanting the others to see him that way, which wasn’t true at all and all the while, his boyfriend refused to look up at him. The light-haired male hated being put in boxes like this, having a label put on him and from no other than the ginger. It was maddening.

 

The word ‘ridiculous’ was still ringing through his head as everything he had to say was either discarded as wrong or stupid and the words he planned to say in reply, just didn’t come out. It felt like his own feelings didn’t matter and his words would only make things worse. At least he got Ethan to look at him, when he threw his cigarette away, but then their lips were crushing together, silencing whatever complaint his boyfriend had planned to issue. Aaron half expected that this time it will be him, being pushed away, but a hand sneaked behind his neck, pulling him down and his boyfriend opened his mouth, letting his tongue slip inside. The ginger replied with the same fire, his tongue trying to take control, but the light-haired male didn’t want to relinquish it.

 

When they broke apart, Aaron needed to take a few deep breaths, but at least he wasn’t the only one panting. There was no use talking, because he was pretty sure he would just end up with the short end of the stick, but at least physical acts got to Ethan. And while he could only think of getting inside and continue this, the ginger just had to provoke him. The light-haired male wanted to kiss the other again, just to remove that smirk from his face, hating how Jake Meyer kept popping up in their conversation all the time. It was true though, this was the street he lived in and some of his neighbors were bound to have seen them, which means that soon, most of the people that knew him will know about this and he wasn’t looking forward to all of that unwanted attention. To his boyfriend, he only replied “Don’t be a dick Ethan,” still feeling angry.

 

Hearing the other say he won’t hide, just made him sigh. He never wanted to ask that of his boyfriend, because he didn’t want to hide either, he just didn’t want to go around town, making out on every corner. But as it always seemed to be the case, he didn’t convey it properly and now they were fighting. Dating his former friend seemed like a perfect idea just this morning, because Aaron was sure the relationship would be easy, but the reality was far from that. He will probably need to change everything about himself, in regards to how he acts around the person he’s dating, for this to work and he suddenly felt very tired. He waited for his boyfriend, who at least decided to stay and when the other returned, he grabbed his luggage and they went inside.

 

While they were walking up towards his apartment, he didn’t even feel hungry anymore, at least not for food. It felt like there was a rock in his stomach, weighing him down. He unlocked his front door, letting his boyfriend enter the flat first, locking the door after them. He didn’t bother to say anything as he threw his shoes in the corner and then he was on Ethan again, pushing him against the wall. The kiss wasn’t as angry as before, but it was still messy. He nibbled and sucked on his boyfriend’s lip, before claiming his mouth, his hands pulling Ethan’s shirt out of his trousers, wanting to feel his bare skin. The light-haired male was sure talking would only make things worse between them and if they didn’t talk, he had to show the other what he was feeling in another way. He wanted the ginger to stop saying how straight he is and that he’s only doing this because he wants his friend back. Why is it so wrong that Aaron wants to do everything he can, so the person he used to feel closest to, stays with him? Like he could go back to seeing Ethan as just a friend, after how they touched and kissed.

[-Hideki-]

Upon arriving in Aaron’s apartment Ethan had just put his suitcase down and thrown his bag into the corner, stepped out of his shoes and placed the suit jacket onto the coatrack when the librarian threw himself at him and Cornwell found his back and arse pressed against the hard, cold wall of the other male’s apartment. Feeling the man’s warm and manly body up against his and the mixture of burning passion and fury in the way the other kissed him only fuelled the ginger’s fire and he aggressively kissed back, their tongues wrapping around each other like fucking snakes, humming into the lewd and rough kiss when he felt the other man’s hand touch the skin on his abdomen, wanting him to touch him more firmly. One of the red head’s hands had a strong grip on the other man’s arse while the other hand was digging itself into the silky silver hair, slightly pulling on it, pressing the man’s body up against his own as they were kissing.

 

When they had to gasp for air the ginger was pushing against the other man, forcing him to follow along towards the bedroom whilst smashing his lips against the other’s hungrily, biting down on his bottom lip, pulling Aaron’s shirt over his head on the way, flinging it somewhere onto the ground. Kissing the way into the bedroom he kicked the door close with his foot when they had entered it, a furious desire boiling in him and Aaron truly was playing with fire right now. Ethan wanted to put all of those emotions into a fuck, he wanted to fuck it out, wanted to take the other, make him his as he fucked him roughly and dominantly and at the same time the rational part of his brain that was not controlled by his raging hormones told him that he couldn’t. That the other was a bloody virgin in that sense and that the way he originally had planned to go about this, to not even put his dick in at the first time but just fingering him, had been the best way to go.

 

However his reason was fighting against windmills as the ginger was driven by want and lust and his now hard cock knew exactly what it wanted. Cornwell pushed Aaron onto the large, soft bed, his hazel eyes on the lean, athletic build of the other, seeing that light happy trail disappearing down in his trousers and he took in a sharp breath as more blood was pumped into his cock. The ginger only opened the first few buttons of his shirt and threw it away before he stepped over to the bedside table opening a drawer hoping that Wilson owned lube because it would have been a hassle to go and get it out of his suitcase. He was lucky enough to find a full bottle of lube in it though and he threw it onto the bed next to the man before he jumped onto it, towering over Aaron’s hot mess of a body, his hands grabbing a hold of the man’s wrists, pinning him down onto the mattress, kissing him demandingly and deeply, then breaking the kiss and kissing and sucking his skin down from his neck to his chest, grinding their crotches together his confined erection rubbing and pressing up against the silver haired male’s cock.

 

Rubbing up against the other his lips had found the man’s nipple and he licked over it, pinched it with his teeth before vigorously sucking on it, before his lips and tongue went further down the hot torso of the other man, tracing down his muscles, breathing against the wet skin. Letting go of Aaron’s wrists his hands moved straight for the hem of Wilson’s pants. His patience for teasing and fooling around was limited, his blood was boiling, his cock throbbing and he wanted to fuck him. The moment was way too heated for him to think clearly and unaffectedly by how much he wanted him, how much he wanted to feel him, to feel the tight choke of the man’s insides around his cock, to flog his arse so good that he’d never even think about a woman anymore in his entire life and would be craving his dick for eternity from thereon.

 

Aaron’s pants and boxers went quickly, flung somewhere close to Cornwell’s shirt and Ethan got a grip of Aaron’s hard rod while his mouth licked and sucked on each of his balls. He then took the hand away for a moment, licking the other man’s length, coating it in saliva, then letting it circle around the glans, wrapping his hand around the man’s dick again as he was sucking the head of his cock. He then let go of his cock completely for a moment, taking the man’s legs to spread them, pulling him into a position where he got better access to his arse and his arse-cheeks were spreading somewhat automatically the sight of the delicate, rosy hole arousing him further, making his pulsating cock twitch in anticipation and he was spreading the man’s arse-cheeks wider apart, two of his fingers at first brushing, then rubbing over the tempting entrance of the other, pressing onto it some. And Ethan’s eyes flashed up lustily, getting even more heated and aroused.

 

Reaching out he got the bottle of lube next to them. One could hear the bottle open and in the next moment the lubricant was running onto his right hand, applying it onto the rosy hole. He rubbed his lube coated index finger over it, beginning to prod Aaron’s anus. “Relax now.” The ginger said in his deep voice, trying to sound calm and reassuring and not just horny as fuck, what he was. His index finger was working its way into the incredibly tight hole of the other, the muscle seemingly wanting to crush it but it went inside and the red head let the other adjust to it, before he moved it some, then pulled it out again, to add the middle finger and enter both of them, giving the other some time to adjust and to relax around them again, beginning to move his fingers inside, pulling out and thrusting them in again, while his left hand was starting to stroke the man’s cock, giving him stimulation in the front at the same time. He made his fingers first brush against the silver haired man’s prostate, moving his fingers really slowly, before he pressed them onto it, feeling the spot, then making his fingers hit against his prostate more firmly and repeatedly, his other hand increasing the pressure and the pace of the strokes around the man’s cock, while Ethan’s hazel eyes were closely examining the silver haired man’s face while he was preparing him and wanted him to get used to the feeling, so that he could stop if the other was in pain or discomfort.

[Ayakashiu]

This time his kiss got returned too and Aaron felt like his brain shut down, his instincts taking control and they were screaming to him to get closer, to feel more skin. He felt a hand on his behind, pulling him even tighter against his boyfriend’s body. The other hand was entangled in his hair, pulling on it and Aaron loved the roughness, not having to hold himself back either so he won’t hurt his partner. His hands were running all over Ethan’s torso, exploring all the places he could reach in their current position.

 

As soon as they broke the kiss, Ethan started pushing him back towards the bedroom and Aaron didn’t resist, his boyfriend kissing him the whole time and getting rid of his shirt in the process. It was a bit awkward walking backwards, while trying to keep his body as close to the other man as possible, but they managed to tumble into the bedroom. The light-haired male was forced to pull his hands out from underneath his boyfriend’s shirt, when his own got pulled off and he immediately missed the other’s warmth. He settled for wrapping his arms around the ginger’s neck, pulling him down so he had easy access to his mouth.

 

Once in the bedroom, he was pushed down on the bed as Ethan’s gaze traveled down his body, making it heat up and he couldn’t help but slowly lick his lips teasingly as his boyfriend got rid of his shirt too. He was thinking he wants to touch that body all over with his hands and his lips and the thought translated directly into his cock, making it twitch with anticipation, as the other man fiddled with his drawer, tossing a bottle of lube onto the bed. Aaron’s brain was sending him warning signals, but he didn’t care and the next moment he was already pinned down by Ethan. His boyfriend grabbed his wrists, keeping him in place as his slightly bigger body towered above him and it made the smaller man inhale deeply. It must have awaken some animal part of him, because he never thought he might find the sight of his former friend pushing him down arousing.

 

His boyfriend didn’t let go of his hands as he moved from his lips, following the line of his neck, kissing and sucking on it, all the while rubbing their hips together. Aaron made a disgruntled noise, wanting to touch and feel his partner too, not just grind his hips against the other’s, but it turned into a surprised moan, as Ethan’s teeth pinched his nipple. It was still a weird feeling, because as a guy, he never really thought someone would suck on them. What was even weirder was that while it hurt a bit, the other not caring about being gentle, he could also feel it in his crotch. But the ginger wasn’t finished yet, continuing to lick and kiss his torso, making Aaron squirm underneath him, because it wasn’t enough.

 

As soon as the pressure from his wrists was gone, Aaron wanted to reach for his boyfriend, touching him too, but the other was already discarding his pants, before taking his erect member in his hand, his mouth sucking on his balls. The sudden stimulation made him throw his head back as he bit his lip, the little sparks of pleasure making his breath hitch as his boyfriend licked his length and sucked on the head. But before he could really get into it, Ethan’s mouth was gone and he was spreading his legs open wide. Feeling fingers brush over his anus made him let out a strangled noise, the brushing turning into rubbing and probing. His brain was screaming at him to run, but he knew that saying anything would just lead to more talking and he didn’t want to talk right now, so he just lied there as his boyfriend poured lube onto his hand, his knuckles turning white from clenching the sheets so hard.

 

He threw an aggravated look at his boyfriend, as he was told to relax. How was he supposed to do that, when his butt was about to be violated?! He focused on the ceiling, trying to keep his face blank as one finger started to make its way inside of him. The feeling was weird to say the least, not being used to getting stretched he wanted to reflexively clench his butt cheeks. He was telling himself that he’s a man and he can handle this, when Ethan pushed one finger inside. He was getting used to the feeling, but then his boyfriend wiggled it, before pulling it out and it made the light-haired male twitch. The relief didn’t last long, because a second finger joined the first and Aaron had to keep himself from moving away, the stretching feeling more intense this time. But just feeling the fingers inside wasn’t so bad, until Ethan started to thrust them in an out and the light-haired male couldn’t keep in a groan. His boyfriend started to stroke his cock again and the stimulation was a welcome distraction and Aaron tried to focus on it.

 

His breathing was labored and he was thinking this is taking too long, but then his boyfriend pressed on a spot that made him jolt. Surprise was written all over his face at discovering this newfound feeling. So as Ethan continued hitting that place with his fingers, all the while stroking him, Aaron couldn’t help but let out a moan. The way Ethan was making him feel was overwhelming and the hazel eyes staring at him only intensified it. He couldn’t help but squirm under the ministrations, the pressure building inside of him being almost too much to bear, until it spilled over and he came all over himself. He could feel his face heating up, ready to be swallowed up by the earth and he pulled a pillow over his face, trying to hide his panting. He couldn’t believe he just came that fast! But how was he supposed to hold it in with that much stimulation? And he even moaned; another guy just fingered him and it made him moan! Yup, he was definitely ready to die now.

[-Hideki-]

Since he was examining the other man’s facial expression closely he could see how there was surprise written on it at the first hit he gave to Aaron’s prostate and how the surprise faded into pleasure. It was erotic and incredibly arousing how the attractive silver haired male’s body was jolting and trembling in pleasure the stimulation of his prostate and his cock caused him and it made Ethan inhale deeply, watching the man with the eyes of a hungry wolf, going somewhat faster and harder with his fingers feeling the man’s hot insides grabbing them strongly, as if his arse wanted to devour the ginger’s hand. Then there was that erotic voice, the moans the man let him hear echoing through the room and seeing that hot, athletic body squirm and bend was turning him on so much and he wanted to fuck that manly body all the more, making him cause to scream his name and tremble even more, making the other see stars.

 

It shouldn’t come to this right now though as the red head could feel his boyfriend’s cock twitch, the man’s sexy muscles constricting, his arsehole nearly breaking his fingers before Aaron came hard, spurting out what seemed like a fountain of cum, staining his own body with it. While that intense ejaculation wasn’t all that surprising, Wilson had obviously never milked his prostate before, heck, he had not even considered that stimulating it was something that could be remotely pleasurable, it was still extremely hot and the ginger let out a deep aroused, horny noise, his hazel eyes taking the heavily breathing body in, the white sperm that was covering spots of the pale skin, glistering on the librarian’s muscles and the red head’s aching cock in its prison was throbbing hard at the sight and Cornwell was rubbing over it with his hand.

 

Looking up into Aaron’s face he could see the man blush red furiously though and next thing he knew was his lover, who just seemed to be the perfect bottom, grabbing one of his pillows pressing it over his face. Ethan laid his head to the side watching him doing that, his lips curling up into an amused smile. “Oh boy.” He exclaimed not less amused and he chuckle slightly. “I told you no bottom would do that if they didn’t get intense pleasure from it and didn’t enjoy it.” He spoke and shifted on the bed, lying down beside the attractive man who was hiding his cute face from him after having cum that quickly.

 

Ethan got his hand to the writer’s and got it off of the pillow and pulled the pillow away, leaning down, so that his face was right over the other’s and he could look into his blue eyes. “Look at me cutie!” he said. “There is nothing you need to feel embarrassed about and nothing wrong with this either.” The ginger said. “If you’re worried that this makes you less manly now or any other bullshit straight people told you, forget it, it’s not true.” The ginger assured him remembering with which terms the other had described gay males positions while having sex, having accused Ethan of ‘having imagined him to be ‘the girl’ in the relationship’ completely shocked.

 

The red head pressed his lips onto Aaron’s kissing him passionately and lustily, clearly showing how much he wanted him and how horny he was. He was painfully aroused and his cock was aching in his way too fucking tight pants after all. After he broke the kiss a string of saliva was connecting their lips until Ethan spoke. “You were so hot and erotic. Your body and that voice of yours! I want to hear it more.” The ginger whispered into the other’s ear, nibbling on it. “It not solely turns me on though; it also makes me happy that you seem to be born to be a bottom.” He spoke his grin a little cockily. “You made me so hard! I want you so bad!” the man said, taking Aaron’s hand and making it grab his raging erection, letting out a gasp as he needed to either finally bury his cock into the other or be otherwise stimulated at least.

 

“Knowing how good that felt now, imagine how it’ll feel if I ravage you and your tight sexy hole will be spread by my hard cock and I will hammer onto that prostate properly making you see stars from pleasure.” He breathed into the man’s ear, not trying to coat the intense arousal and lust in it, his hand roaming over the other’s torso, not caring about the cum that was on it, letting his finger circle around the man’s nipple, slightly rubbing it, then pulling it. Ethan felt a little as though he was the snake in paradise for Aaron rather the snake in his Christian fundamentalist small town, trying to seduce him and make him his but then again, the red head had kinda liked the snake best in that story and Eve for that matter because she had decided to not be a sheep that blindly followed instructions but had made the decision to act and get what she had desired. Well, apparently Ethan’s thoughts about those stories he had had to hear in bloody Bible school up and down weren’t what his evangelical parents had wanted him to conclude from them.

[Ayakashiu]

As Aaron tried to find out, if he can suffocate himself with a pillow, he heard an amused chuckle come from his boyfriend and a comment how he told him it will be pleasurable. He could feel the other move and his body lying down next to him. But the light-haired male didn’t get to hide for long, because Ethan pulled the pillow away, his face appearing an inch above his own and then he started talking, which was something Aaron wanted to avoid and for a reason. He was being called cutie and then told how he isn’t less manly now, which only made him think about things he didn’t want to think, like what’s yet to come.

 

Then they were back on track, kissing again and Aaron started to get livelier. This time his arms weren’t pinned down, so he used them to play with the fiery red hair, to slide down his boyfriend’s back, hooking one finger under his pants, teasing him. The kiss was ended way too soon for the light-haired male, who was in the mood for some exploring now that he was just pleasured, but Ethan wasn’t. The words whispered in his ear made him blush and he had to bite his lip when his boyfriend nibbled on his earlobe, stifling a groan. The other’s grin got cocky, when he remarked how he’s happy Aaron seems to be born a bottom and it made the light-haired male shot him a nasty look. “You should stop talking now,” he said in a breathless voice, when his hand got pulled towards Ethan’s erection, his touch making the ginger gasp.

 

Now that was erotic for Aaron, seeing Ethan craving his touch so much and his lips spread in a wide grin, as he rubbed his hand over the bulge in the other’s pants. But his boyfriend seemed to be a talker, because he went on and described just how exactly he wants Aaron, breathing it into his ear, making his heart beat jump. He could get hard again just from the ginger talking in his ear, the arousal clear in his voice, Ethan not even needing to touch him. But right now the other was touching him, not caring that he was still covered with sperm, finding his nipples again. Aaron gasped as he felt the pull and he playfully swatted his boyfriend’s hand away, saying in an amused voice, “Don’t abuse my nipples!” before suddenly getting up and flipping Ethan on his back.

 

“This looks uncomfortable,” he commented, as he proceeded to free the ginger’s erect member from his pants. Aaron always found his former’s friend hair color almost exotic, even more so that his body hair seemed to be the same color. As he went on and wrapped his hand around the rosy cock, this time with more confidence, he knew that he could make his boyfriend come this way. But then he remembered the face Ethan made when he went down on him and he was suddenly overtaken by lust, wanting to see him like that again.

 

His brain seemed to be getting back online, now that his body got the release it was craving, but it surprised Aaron how he was thinking he wants to see the face Ethan will make, when entering him. He didn’t know where that came from, but it was making him horny and he knew what his boyfriend really wanted; it wasn’t jerking off. He already let the other stick his fingers inside, so how bad could it be? The light-haired male pointedly refused to think how his boyfriend’s dick seemed quite bigger than his fingers.

 

He stroked the erect length in his hand a few times, rubbing the tip with his thumb, as he moved his face closer to Ethan’s, locking his azure blue eyes on hazel ones. “I don’t want to imagine it, show me how it feels,” he breathed out, trying to make his voice sound alluring, before remembering something and quickly adding, “But I don’t want you to take me from behind, I want to see your face.” His breathing elevated, rush of expectation going through his body, as he waited for his boyfriend's response.

[-Hideki-]

It even created some kind of relieve in him when the other seemed to get livelier again and he could feel the man’s hand in his red hair and all over him, exploring his body instead of hiding under a pillow seeming as if he wanted to drop dead from embarrassment. Even getting him a threatening look telling him that he shall rather stop talking now after the ginger had expressed how Aaron seemed to be a born bottom and the writer’s voice still being husky and his breath shallow only made it more hilarious and Ethan couldn’t hold back a laugh.

 

The other man’s hand on his cock, feeling the other rubbing it over his caged erection made sparks start to built and he automatically pressed his crotch up against that hand, wanting to feel the touch more resulting in his voice to sound even more husky and aroused when he was trying to plant that fantasy and the same yearning he had into Wilson’s head. When the other then replied with telling him to not abuse his nipples in a jesting manner, shoving his hand away he gave his lover a questioning look which changed when the man was pushing him onto his back but not for surprise but curiosity, wanting to know what the other would decide to do now.

 

Ethan had not been talking for shits and giggles or because he had just wanted to chit chat while they were in bed, obviously not. For once had he wanted to get the other to leave that retarded narrative he apparently had of bottoming behind and to stop feeling embarrassed by giving him some reassurance because it would be a bloody hassle if his boyfriend would get crazy embarrassed and would hide behind a pillow every time Cornwell got close to his arse and gave him a prostate orgasm. Sure it was rather funny and cute now but that it was only once, then it would get uncomfortable and odd and super annoying. And second and in this very moment probably even more important he wanted Aaron to give him green light to plunge his sexy arse. He wanted to get the other man to crave his cock inside as much as he craved to be between his legs and although he had definitely seen arousal in Aaron’s eyes when he had whispered in his ear, he had still no idea if he had actually achieved that or if he wouldn’t get to sink the other’s ship anytime soon.

 

However his thoughts got distracted when the man released his raging erection and freed it from the confinements of his pants, his cock springing free, the chilli air in the room greeting the heated rod. There was both a spark of pleasure that made him hum going through his body when he could feel the other’s hand wrapping around his length, stroking it and the thumb rubbing over his glans with more confidence than before and the ginger’s hips started to thrust into the hand desperate for more pressure and friction but there was also a hint of disappointment making its way onto his mind as it seemed that Aaron would result to base one, giving him a handjob, what wasn’t by far what he was hoping for or wanting right now.

 

Then the silver haired was suddenly leaning down, his face getting close to his own, his blue eyes meeting Ethan’s aroused, greedy hazel gaze telling him that he didn’t just want to imagine how it felt to have his arse fucked by him but that he wanted the ginger to show him and he could feel those words electrifying his whole body, all the electricity streaming right into his dick. If Ethan would have been a cartoon character he would have gotten a major nosebleed now. The ginger instantly pressed his lips against the other’s kissing him wildly and sexual and unrestrained, his tongue feverishly rolling around the other’s and the ginger got his body up, his hands grabbing the other’s arse-cheeks, spreading them open rather firmly while he was kissing him, before pushing the man back down onto the mattress. “That’s exactly what I wished to hear.” He breathed into the man’s ear with a shaky breath after that kiss, biting his earlobe, then kissing and sucking the other’s neck leaving even more marks there. And it was exactly what he had wanted to hear the other man say, he had just not thought that he actually would say something like this to him, especially not this confidently without being awkward or embarrassed or giving him one of those looks he sometimes gave him.

 

While his lips were kissing over the other’s torso, licking off some of the man’s cum from it without thinking much anything of it other than how hot he found it when his lovers did something like this and he was rubbing his thick hard cock between Aaron’s arse-cheeks and over his tempting hole he heard the other man’s voice again telling him he didn’t want him to take him from behind because he wanted to be able to see his face while they did it. It made him chuckle against the hot skin of the man’s torso. “As you wish M’lord!” the ginger spoke in a playful, teasing way actually finding that request rather sweet and not having wanted to fuck him from behind now in the first place. Not only did he want to see his face as well, it would also be better than fucking him from behind since it was the other’s first time doing that after all. And that way he could keep an eye on his expression and detect if something was off and stop or change what he was doing according to that. If he were to fuck him from behind it would be on Aaron to tell him if he was uncomfortable and something was painful and with the embarrassment around the subject the other had portrait just a few moments ago he didn’t really trust him to communicate this back to him or to be able to give him an actually serious answer if he asked him how it felt instead of making a sharp remark and blushing beet red.

 

Rubbing his cock between the other man’s arse-cheeks made him feel pleasure and his temperature had been getting up, and his breath had gotten thicker, his dick leaking some pre-cum but it wasn’t enough in the slightest and he didn’t have any more patience left at all. Hence he brought the other man’s arse into a convenient position again, his hand reaching for the bottle of lube another time and he drenched his cock in lube before applying another load of it onto and into Aaron’s hole by entering his fingers. The fingers were gone again as soon as he had entered them though and he grabbed a hold of the silver haired male’s legs, throwing them over his shoulders, then grabbing the other’s hips, lifting his arse from the bed before he rubbed the tip of his cock against the librarian’s anus, beginning to prod it, his dick gradually and slowly entering the other man and seeing how the hole was spreading was only turning Ethan on more.

 

A deep hum was coming from him when his whole length was buried inside of Aaron’s hot clenching insides, the muscle wrapping tightly around his dick making him want to move immediately but he let the other adjust to the thick rod that was sticking inside of him now. When he felt that the man’s muscle relaxed some he was starting to move slowly, finding his pace and rhythm, aiming for his prostate, his dick lightly pressing against it at first. Ethan soon increased the hardness and the speed of his thrusts though and soon he was penetrating the other rather vigorously, his dick hitting onto the man’s prostate like a hammer onto a nail, the increasingly tight choke of the other man’s insides making more and more pleasure built up and run through Ethan’s entire body, some shooting into his head, making him growl in pleasure and make him flog the other harder, ravaging the other man’s hole even more, his balls smashing against the other’s arse, making lewd noises.

 

 

His hand was reaching out giving the other man’s cock more strokes and pumps what he was doing regularly as he was fucking him, then getting a strong hold of his hips again as he was vigorously fucking him into the matress, trying to restrain himself from becoming too rough but the more the other man’s arse seemed to devour his dick, not wanting to let go of it, the more intense pleasure was shooting through him and into his head and Ethan was consumed by it, he was in pure ecstasy, growling and moaning from time to time, exhausting himself into the other man, sweat starting to glister and run over his pale skin and red body hair making it nearly impossible to hold back. “Aaron!” He moaned ramming his cock into him landing another precise strike to the silver haired man’s prostate, the muscle nearly crashing his cock in return, making him growl, his muscles and veins getting more visible and his grip onto the man’s hips getting even firmer. “Fuck!” he moaned between the laboured panting as he was losing himself in the other man further, bathing in the pleasure that was overflowing his body, wiping his mind clear of everything that wasn’t the writer, his cock inside his tight hole and their fucking.

[Ayakashiu]

The thing Aaron liked the most about the current situation, was that his boyfriend seemed so eager and it wasn’t something he was used to. Usually, a lot more work was needed to get a girl as far as this. But with Ethan, it was all so simple when it came to sex. Even if he never would have imagined enjoying stroking another guy’s cock, it was hard not to, when his partner seemed to be so starved for his touch.

 

It was like those words were the only thing Ethan was waiting for, because as soon as the ginger heard Aaron agree to it, he gave him a kiss that was wild and messy and in which the light-haired male gladly participated. Feeling his buttocks spread, made a lump form in his throat, but he tried to ignore it, rather focusing on returning the kiss eagerly. But it wasn’t long, before he was pushed back down, his boyfriend towering above him and he started to feel slightly nervous. Hearing Ethan say this was exactly what he wished to hear, made him think this will all be worth it, if it will make the ginger enjoy himself.

 

Feeling teeth nibbling on his earlobe, made him exhale loudly and close his eyes, enjoying the feeling. Next was his neck and Aaron could feel goosebumps spreading over his body, as his boyfriend left new marks on him. In the meantime he made sure to touch every part of Ethan he could reach, pulling his fingers through the fiery hair, sliding his hands over the sturdy back that was so different from the curves and the softness he was used to, the same as his boyfriend’s muscular arms. The ginger moved lower down his body, which was still covered in sperm and licked it off, like it was the most natural thing to do. The sight of his partner doing something like this willingly made the light-haired male’s breath hitch, but he was distracted from the hot view when he felt something hard rub over his hole. The lump in his throat seemed to be getting bigger and Aaron gulped hard, trying to get rid of it.

 

The request of not wanting to be taken from behind, made his boyfriend chuckle and Aaron’s muscles constricted, as Ethan’s breath tickled his skin. The playful reply he got, made him smile lopsidedly, at the same time feeling relieved. But it didn’t last long, because his boyfriend was positioning him differently, applying lube first on his erection and then on Aaron. The cool sensation of the lubricant on the sensitive place like that, made the light-haired male clench his butt cheeks involuntarily, but he tried to relax when he felt Ethan’s fingers. His boyfriend seemed done with preparation, because as soon as those fingers entered him, they were out and the ginger threw his legs over his own shoulders. The position was awkward, because not only was Aaron not used to it, but it also felt like he had zero control, his boyfriend holding him up. He wasn’t given much time to think about it though, as something bigger and hotter started prodding at his hole.

 

Aaron thought ‘this is it’ as his boyfriend started entering him and his heart was beating so hard, it threatened to jump out of his rib cage. Ethan was entering him painfully slow and it suddenly felt like he was getting stretched too much, so Aaron instinctively clenched his muscles, hissing out at the stinging feeling. He breathed deeply, forcefully relaxing again until Ethan finally stopped moving, his whole length now resting inside of him. Once the moving stopped, it was easier to bear the stretching that felt so foreign to the smaller man. He felt filled to the brim and didn’t dare to move a muscle, trying to push away the thoughts of what was inside of him right now. Luckily, the sight in front of him offered a good distraction; his boyfriend’s lean body was looming above him, tense with pleasure and Aaron’s eyes wandered from the ginger’s face, down over his torso, following the trail of red hair to the point, where their bodies were joined together. It felt so surreal that his childhood best friend is buried up to the hilt in him, like he was just dreaming and will wake up any moment, but as if he would ever dream about something like this on his own.

 

As soon as the feeling became bearable and the light-haired male started to think he will handle this just fine, Ethan started moving again. It was slow, but the movement made his insides clench again and he groaned out his boyfriend’s name. The more Ethan moved, the harder it was for Aaron to breath, feeling like he was on fire from the friction, although the lube was making everything slick. Soon, his boyfriend was fucking him for real and the angle was allowing him to hit just the right spot, making the light-haired male gasp as the intense pleasure mixed with the uncomfortable feeling of being filled up. When Ethan’s hand joined in and stroked his own dick, Aaron let out a loud moan, his mind blown from overstimulation. He was feeling slightly dizzy from the panting, his body trembling from the conflicting feelings and he suddenly felt like he can’t take it anymore. “Ethan…I can’t…,” he managed to get out between panting and gasping, but his partner seemed to just be really getting into it, so he bit his lip, refraining from begging his boyfriend to stop.

 

Sinful would be the most suitable word to describe Ethan Cornwell at this moment. His body was glistening from the sweat, as he was thrusting his hips forward, his hands gripping Aaron’s hips tightly, holding him in place. The pleasure he was feeling was clear on his face and in the sounds he was making. If the light-haired male wouldn’t be on the receiving end, struggling with everything his body was subjected to, he would definitely enjoy seeing his boyfriend like this more. But the glimpses he caught and hearing Ethan moaning his name, just as his cock hit exactly the right spot, was too much and the light-haired male felt like he is going to burst.

 

Just lying there and taking it, was also something Aaron wasn’t used to, like many things when it came to Ethan. But it’s not like he was able to move or do anything else right now. He probably never felt pleasure so intense, it bordered on painful, while the cause of this pleasure also made him feel uncomfortably hot and stretched out. He wanted to relieve the pressure building in his crotch, while his boyfriend assaulted his prostate, but at the same time he just wanted his partner to be done with it. But there was no way he would voice it out loud, not when he got Ethan to look like that.

 

So not knowing what else he can do right now, he reached towards his own erect member, starting to stroke it. He matched his rhythm to Ethan’s thrusts and the pleasure intensified, as his front and back were tended to. It made it easier for the light-haired male to ignore the discomfort he was feeling, instead focusing all of his attention on his dick. His moans that accompanied Ethan’s thrusts and his own strokes, almost sounded like whines, as he wanted to bring himself to completion the second time. But having cum just a short while ago, made it hard, the pressure building inside of him almost unbearable, like he was standing on the edge of a cliff, needing just a bit more to push him over.

[-Hideki-]

Hearing Aaron’s moans and whines, to see his face, feeling the bending and trembling of his body, the tight grip of his muscle was arousing and only adding to the pleasure he felt. When the silver haired reached for his own cock and started to stroke himself while Ethan was fucking him the sight wasn’t only hot but it also gave the red head the opportunity to focus completely on fucking the man’s arse and he was ramming his cock inside of him like a maniac craving his release, wanting to fill the other up with his seeds completely.

 

His mind and vision was clouded and his mouth slightly gaping as he was panting every thrust and the tight embrace of the man’s muscle getting him closer to orgasm. Another boost and he’d explode but he couldn’t. He had to make the other cum too or this first experiences would probably be dissatisfying to the librarian and that he didn’t want. So he forced it back, forced himself to hold it for a while longer, pushing into the man, thrusting hard against his sweet spot, feeling the other’s muscle clenching more making it almost impossible to not cum right away.

 

The ginger however decided to let the moment in which he could see the muscles of the other’s body constrict, his insides nearly squashing him to be the moment in which he allowed himself to cum together with Aaron. His thrusts got irregular and hard and he bucked into him, the muscles of his entire body constricted and incredibly visible as he was deeply growling in pleasure towering over the other, his cock twitching inside of the other man shooting his load, filling Aaron’s insides with his sperm, his eyes half-lidded and his body a sweaty mess.

 

Panting heavily, his heart pounding hard enough to break through his chest at any minute his hazel eyes were looking down into the blue ones of the other man, his dick still buried in the librarian’s rectum. As he felt the relaxation in his body, he felt like his body just wanted to give in and collapse like a bag of potatoes. So he let go of the silver haired male’s hips and legs and pulled his rod out of his arse, causing his seeds to leak out of the slightly gaping arsehole of his boyfriend, making a wave of arousal come over his satisfied body at the hotness and eroticism of that image.

 

Still breathing heavily Ethan was letting himself fall next to Aaron, allowing himself to relax and close his eyes for a moment. He felt completely content and happy, incredibly happy that he really had been inside the other, had cum in him and that the silver haired had cum from it too and had allowed this. It still was somewhat surreal but he just had had sex with Aaron Wilson! He reached out his hand and took the writer’s hand into his and it made a stupidly content and bright smile appear on his face and he could feel tiredness kicking in and he was about to doze off and nap but then he could hear his stomach rumble calling for food as he had not only gotten tired but hungry too and then there was that urge to smoke he also had. He was pretty hopeless in that regards. He either just fell asleep after fucking – what his last ex had hated – or he got hungry and plundered the fridge.

 

He forced himself to open his eyes again but he couldn’t really bring himself to move and get up just now. “I’m hungry.” He stated. “How about we go and have a shower and then I cook something. Do you still have stuff in the fridge or do we need to go to the market?” the red head wanted to know. He wanted to close his eyes again but didn’t because then he’d probably fall asleep on the fridge…. err, Aaron, fall asleep on Aaron just like that anyway. So he got his body up and looked at the other, got out of bed, took both of the male’s hands and pulled him up from the mattress, smiling widely into his face, picking him up from the ground and making himself a fun out of carrying the man into the bathroom, the smile on his face having turned into a cheeky grin that still remained when he let the other down on the tile floor of the bathroom.

 

Laying his hand under the other’s chin, making him look up to him he kissed him again, passionately and deeply, his hand holding his neck, still grinning when the kiss had broken. “You were incredibly hot.” He said and then his face got a little more serious again as he wanted to know what the other was thinking about this. “I hope we’ll repeat this!?” it was half a statement, half a question and his deep hazel gaze was on the blue eyes of the other man, letting his fingers run through the silver strands of hair. “I love you Aaron.” Ethan said, clarity and sincerity in his voice, he looked straight into the other’s face for another moment before he turned around, turned on the shower, searching for the right temperature. “Do you like showers hotter or colder?” he asked as he hadn’t had any expectations of the other to tell him he loved him as well, he was certain that he wouldn’t say it, he had just wanted to say it and it wasn’t like the other hadn’t known he loved him before.

[Ayakashiu]

Cold sweat was breaking out of his skin, as it seemed like he won’t manage to come again in such a short time, but his boyfriend was ramming into him hard, sending shivers over his body and Aaron’s muscles suddenly tensed as he finally spilled over. When relief washed over him, Ethan’s rhythm got irregular too and the light-haired male could enjoy the view in front of him. Endorphins coursing through his body must have made his brain fuzzy, because seeing the ginger drenched in sweat, his muscles constricting with pleasure and hearing him growl, made Aaron feel satisfied. As their gazes met, he forgot about his discomfort or what they just did and enjoyed the moment.

 

But the moment was short-lived; Ethan pulled out and the movement made the light-haired male groan. He will surely be sore after this. Feeling something drip out of his hole made him try and clench his muscles, but any movement right now send a shot of sharp pain up his body. Aaron wasn’t sure how he feels about having another man’s sperm drip out of his butt, even if it was his boyfriend’s, but at least it wasn’t as painful as he feared it would be. He stayed where he was, as the ginger collapsed next to him, pondering about the situation he was in.

 

He, surprisingly, didn’t regret anything; sucking up some discomfort was worth it, if it served to avoid talking about their previous fight. But there wasn’t only discomfort, he actually came twice, which was quite surprising. Wasn’t his refractory period usually longer? The comment about him being a born bottom still didn’t sit right with his ego, but thinking back now, the prospect didn’t seem so bad and the act itself didn’t make him feel humiliated. He wondered if it would feel as good, if he would be the one on top, but he couldn’t really imagine that and didn’t really have an inclination to try it. Being an easy going person that he was, he decided to accept this new role he was given and make the most of it. The only thing that bothered him about the whole thing right now, was the discomfort he was feeling. He didn’t dare move, because his lower regions were aching and he wasn’t used to being bent, so his back suffered too, but if he stayed still it wasn’t so bad.

 

He was pulled out of his musings, when he felt a warm hand sneak into his own and he gave it a soft squeeze. When he turned his head to look at Ethan, there was a bright smile on the ginger’s face, making him look younger and so happy. A matching smile appeared on his own face, but at the same time he felt weight on his chest, as guilt swelled up; he could have made his former friend look like this way back then, but instead, they both ended up hurt, because he was clueless. Then a loud rumble came from the direction of his boyfriend’s stomach and it made the light-haired male chuckle. When Ethan stated he’s hungry, he grinned and replied, “I can hear that.” The next suggestion made him close his eyes and make an exaggerated pained sound. “Seriously? I don’t think I can move. How about we skip the shower and just stay like this?” he offered a suggestion of his own, knowing it won’t happen. “But wow, first you made me cum twice and now you offered to cook for me? Now I’m really in love,” he teased with an impish grin on his face. He was starving when they finished work, but right now he wasn’t sure he could stomach anything. He also wasn’t sure what he had in his refrigerator, because while he was writing, he often forgot to eat and he just finished one of his books, so anything was possible. “Eeeem, I’m not really sure how much supplies I have, but there’s usually something in the fridge…I think. Maybe it is best, if you check it out yourself.” The light-haired male shot an apologizing smile at his partner, hoping he at least had some basic ingredients handy. He was only sure about having toast and coffee, because he had that for breakfast and because he always had a huge stash of coffee, so he wouldn’t run out of it by accident.

 

But as much as he wished to just lay on his bed a while longer, his boyfriend had other plans. Ethan looked like he was ready to fall asleep, but despite that he managed to get himself upright and then pulled Aaron up too. The light-haired male wasn’t happy about that and he grumbled as he was lifted from the comfortable bed, his legs still trembling a bit. But before he could voice his displeasure, he noticed Ethan’s smile, knowing it doesn’t mean anything good and then the taller man lifted him up. It made him let out a strangled noise, as he was transported into the bathroom and as much as he wanted to struggle, his body didn’t allow him to. So to at least show some resistance, he smacked his boyfriend’s behind, murmuring, “You suck.”

 

As soon as he was positioned back on the floor, he felt a hand under his chin, lifting it up so he faced the still grinning Ethan. He wanted to tell his boyfriend off for pulling him out of bed, but the kiss he received made him forget all about it. On a second thought, he really did need a shower. Hearing Ethan say he found him hot, made the light-haired male blush, but he couldn’t really imagine it. He had a feeling he had done too little, just lying there as his boyfriend did most of the work, but on the other hand, he will have to bear with the soreness their intercourse caused. The next question caused him to make a bewildered expression, because he thought the ginger wanted to do it again right now. “Whoa, slow down. I can barely move right now,” he blurted out, before his brain had time to think the words through. “Oh,” he let out, as he realized what the other man probably meant, smiling awkwardly. “I mean sure, just next time go easier on me ok? I’m not sure I can work, if you’ll leave me barely standing every time.” His voice had a jesting undertone, but he was actually completely satisfied at the moment. Or he would be, if his boyfriend didn’t drag him out of bed.

 

But he got more serious, as Ethan locked his hazel eyes on his own blue ones. The hand brushing his hair felt soothing, but the other’s words made a lump form in his throat again. As they kept staring into each other’s eyes, Aaron felt a surge of panic, because even if he said ‘I love you’ back, it wouldn’t hold the same meaning. It was obvious their feelings were on a different level, Ethan knowing since way back exactly what he felt, while Aaron was just starting to catch up. So it felt wrong to say it, but he didn’t want to leave his former friend without a response. The ginger didn’t give him much time to decide what to say though, turning around and starting to prepare the shower. The light-haired male was relieved, although his heart was still racing from hearing those three words, while on the other hand, he hoped Ethan was ok with him not saying anything.

 

It seemed like his boyfriend really didn’t expect him to reply, because he casually asked him what shower he prefers, waiting for his answer to set the right temperature. But Aaron couldn’t shake the feeling he needs to say or do at least something to show the other he cares, so he stepped closely to his lover’s back, wrapping his arms around the other’s chest, before replying. “Hot.” His fingers drew circles on his boyfriend’s body, as he leaned on his back, waiting for the water to warm up, trying to think of what to say. Feelings were hard to express for him, so in the end he ended up teasingly saying, “I’ll admit one thing. You saying you’re a great lover yesterday, weren’t just empty words. I’m really lucky that you dig nerdy librarians.” This was the best the light-haired male could do right now and he hoped Ethan will get what he means.

 

Reaching one hand out, he could feel the water was warm enough, so he carefully stepped around his boyfriend’s body, letting the warm spray run over his body. Too much movement still felt uncomfortable, so he once again slid his body next to the ginger’s, embracing him. “Wash me, please?” he said with a pleading voice, wanting to feel Ethan’s hands on his body. Aaron really wasn’t a clingy person by nature, but he loved snuggling when he felt worn out and right now he felt really tired. Hoping his boyfriend wouldn’t mind it, he squeezed closer, feeling like he might just fall asleep right there and then.

[-Hideki-]

It was simply adorable to Ethan how Aaron acted again, smacking his arse telling him he sucked as he was carrying him into the bathroom as well as the furious red blush on his face when he told the man how hot he had been when they had fucked. And the ginger couldn’t hold back laughter when the silver haired man was looking at him almost shocked blurting out that he should slow down and that he could barely even move right now when he had simply wanted to know if the other was open to having sex with him again sometimes. It was hilarious. “It’s flattering that you think I have the stamina of a fucking machine.” He joked as he waited for an actual answer, seeing the other smile awkwardly at him.

 

When he finally got the answer his heart made a happy jump when the man agreed to repeating this adding the request that the red head shall go easier on him, expressing how he wasn’t sure if he could go to work if he barely left him standing every time they had sex. Now there was an awkward smile on Ethan’s face. Maybe he had indeed gotten too carried away for the first time but he wasn’t really used to restraining himself and he had really tried. “Too rough?” he asked his hazel eyes peering into the blue ones. And as he was thinking he questioned whether the man was used to any roughness in bed and physical intimacy at all. Wilson had only been with women before after all and from Marco who was bisexual he had heard that women’s touch wasn’t strong and rough and that women also required to not being rough but considerate and gentle with them and Ethan’s promiscuous best friend had found that restricting and the rough, unrestrained physicality another advantage fucking other men had compared to fucking women and it made him wonder how the librarian saw this now that he had too, like Marco, experienced both sides of the coin, although not as numerous as Marco. “Do you like sex better with women? Or with men?” he wanted to know. “Be honest!”

 

After Ethan had dropped the ‘I love you’ bomb onto the other what in his case wasn’t much of a bomb or a surprise at all because the other already knew what he was feeling for him although he hadn’t said it to him in that way and he was concerning himself with the shower asking his boyfriend to tell him which temperature he preferred there was silence for a moment. A much longer moment than was necessary to answer a simple question like this and the ginger knew it was because of those words he had just said to the man and he was asking himself whether he should have not when he suddenly felt strong arms wrapping around him from behind, the other’s warm, hard torso pressing against his back, those fingers drawing patterns onto his chest and through his chest hair and his breath stuck in his lungs for a moment the way the other said ‘hot’ into his ear, making sparks of arousal stream through his body and he nodded but turned around to the other as he spoke further.

 

A laugh and a grin were his first response to the other teasingly stating that he admitted that Ethan had not been lying when he had said that he was a great lover and that he was lucky that the ginger was digging nerdy librarians. It send his heart racing and made him happy to hear at least that much and he turned around completely, pressing his lips onto the other’s kissing him deeply and claiming, the grin getting extremely wide as he looked at Aaron. “You are!” he agreed, stroking through the silver hair. “I’m glad I’m digging nerdy librarians too.” he winked.

 

The moment the other stepped under the shower and the hot water was running down the lean, toned form of the other his hazel eyes were just staring for a moment and he almost forgot to step under it as well. It felt a little like back then in that moment, where he had admired the man’s physique in the shower room of the water park or after swimming classes and had brought himself into risky and embarrassing situations because he had gotten a raging erection from seeing that attractive man washing himself, wishing he could touch him. There was a difference though and not only that Aaron had even gotten way more attractive now that he was in his thirties but also that the ginger could touch him, that they’d be showering together, that even if he’d get hard it didn’t matter and the other could see it and feel it instead of having to hide how aroused he made him.

 

Ethan had not been completely under the shower himself yet and the librarian was clinging onto him, embracing his body as he had gotten next to him. And what followed send blood rushing downstairs, hearing that pleading voice of the other asking him to wash his gorgeous body. “Sure.” The ginger said, slightly pressing his lips against the other’s before he took the shower gel and was starting to wash his lover and he took his time doing so. His hands were sliding over the muscular arms, his shoulders, over his chest, feeling the light nearly invisible hair on his upper body, not able to resist the urge of toying his nipples a little, letting his hands sliding down, feeling those muscles his eyes following his hands, seeing the water washing the foam away, the man’s body all wet and steamy and it was so hot and he took a sharp breath.

 

“You’re so handsome.” He breathed into Aaron’s ear before his lips started to kiss and suck his neck, not able to resist touching him more as he was washing the other’s flaccid dick, getting it slippery from the soap, feeling the delicate skin, pulling the foreskin back letting the water run over the man’s gorgeous dick. Forcing himself to let go of his lover’s penis his hands roamed over the other’s back and down to his arse which he was kneading as he was washing it before one hand was spreading the cheeks and the other was washing between them, before entering two fingers into the anus to draw out the cum, the sperm getting washed away by the water.

 

When his hands had really been everywhere on Aaron’s body he placed the shower gel back and took the shampoo massaging it into the silky hair that he adored expending the whole thing to giving the other a head massage with a smile curling around his lips. “Would you wash me next?” he asked him. “Or too tired?”

[Ayakashiu]

As his boyfriend peered at him with the awkward smile, asking if he was too rough, Aaron wanted to say ‘no’ and let him do whatever he pleases with his body. Ethan smiling, was a newfound weak point for him. Luckily, his mouth stayed shut for once and his brain had time to form a normal response. “Maybe a little. Or maybe it’s just because I’m not used to it and it was overwhelming. Let’s wait and see next time,” he replied with a smile. It would probably be really weird if his boyfriend suddenly turned all gentle, because he wasn’t a person that liked overly romantic stuff. So the ginger going all wild and rough played a big part in getting Aaron so excited. He could do without the accompanying pain though, so the light-haired male hoped his body will really get used to this.

 

Being asked if he prefers having sex with women or men, made him raise his eyebrows questioningly. What’s up with that question? Was Ethan feeling insecure or something? No, it didn’t look like it and Aaron tilted his head, scratching it. His boyfriend said to be honest, but it was a hard question to answer, seeing as he had a lot of experience with girls and only one with a guy. Not to mention it was vastly different to be on top or to be on the receiving end. In terms of being comfortable, he was definitely more comfortable with fucking women, because that’s what he was doing his whole life. But Ethan just opened a whole new world for him, showing him how much pleasure he could give him. He looked up, his blue eyes searching for hazel ones, as he answered, “It’s hard to compare, since it’s only been this one time and my role got reversed. To be honest, I can’t say what I like more in general, but I can say I like doing it more with you than with any other woman.” If Aaron would need to choose between any girl and Ethan, he would definitely go for his boyfriend. Maybe getting fucked was uncomfortable, but everything else they’ve done has been mind-blowing and if he won’t get used to having sex with his former friend, he will very gladly get used to receiving oral on a regular basis.

 

Ethan cockily agreeing that Aaron really was happy the ginger digs nerdy librarians, made him shake his head, but chuckle at the same time nonetheless. The light-haired male’s hands sneaked up, wrapping around the ginger’s neck and he pulled him down into another short kiss, before lightly biting on his lip, before moving away. “You should be happy this nerdy librarian digs you!” he said, wearing a wide grin.

 

Felling the warmness spread over his body, as he stepped under the water, was pure bliss. Aaron definitely preferred hot showers; although he used cold ones after working out to refresh himself, he didn’t enjoy them. As he looked at his boyfriend, who was still rooted to the spot, he suddenly felt a bit awkward. The ginger seemed lost in thought, while he was staring at his completely naked body and it made him wonder, if his boyfriend likes what he’s seeing. His body didn’t need much to gain muscle, so while his build was lean, it was still nicely defined.

 

When the other man agreed to wash him, he let out a satisfied hum. Ethan took his time, thoroughly cleaning his body, starting at his arms, sliding all over his torso, making Aaron gasp quietly as he stopped to tease his nipples. The soothing movement of his boyfriend’s hands and the warm water almost lulled him to sleep, but the sharp intake of breath made him open his eyes and hearing his boyfriend call him handsome, made him smile. Then the light-haired male could feel lips on his neck, making goosebumps spread over his body as his boyfriend’s hands started to clean his member. There was no way he would get erect again, but it still felt so good to be touched down there. When Ethan pulled his foreskin back, the water running over the exposed head of his penis, Aaron moaned. But the ginger’s hands were already traveling to his back, leaving the light-haired male yearning for more. He was brought out of the pleasant stupor, when two fingers stretched his aching hole and his whole body stiffened. The sting of pain at the sudden intrusion was in such contrast with the previous coziness, that it awakened him completely. The hot water dulled the unpleasant feeling to some degree, as Ethan washed away all of his sperm and Aaron’s body relaxed again.

 

The light-haired male couldn’t help but feel a pang of disappointment, when his former friend put down the shower gel. He wanted to stay like this for a while longer and almost as if Ethan could read his mind, he started washing his hair next. The ginger’s fingers massaging his scalp made shivers of pleasure run down his body and at that moment, Aaron felt like everything was perfect in the world. His boyfriend asking him, if he was too tired to wash him in return, gave him a perfect excuse and he could just say he was too tired, but it’s not like washing the other’s body was a chore. “Hm, I’ll wash you, but only ‘cause it’s you,” he teased, waiting for the water to wash away all the shampoo from his hair, before picking up the soap.

 

Wanting to return the favor equally, Aaron made sure to take his time too. He poured some shower gel on his hands, before starting to wash one arm. His thumb pressed on the muscles, the foam enabling it to slide down easily, so he gave the other a massage as he washed him, repeating the same thing on the other side. When he was finished, he ordered, “Turn around.” Being slightly smaller than Ethan, it was hard to properly wash his back, so when his boyfriend turned, he traced the outlines of his muscles from the neck down, firmly pressing on them, before sliding his whole hands back up again. It was his first time giving a massage to another guy, but the light-haired male liked the other’s prominent muscles, allowing himself to use a bit more force, hoping that the ginger is enjoying it. After he thought he dedicated enough attention to the back, he let his hands travel lower, tracing the muscles of Ethan’s behind, but not stopping there. His boyfriend did say he was an exclusive top, so Aaron wasn’t sure if he really likes someone poking around his butt. So he let his hands slip over the hips and to the front, changing direction just before he would touch the other’s penis. The light-haired male proceeded to wash his boyfriend’s front, making sure to tease the taller guy a bit, circling around his member. He was a bit tired though, so it wasn’t long before he leaned on the toned back in front of him, giving the same attention to Ethan’s dick as he received just a little before, soaping every part of it, sliding under to give some attention to his boyfriend’s sack, before finishing his administrations.

 

He just stayed like this for a few moments, leaning on Ethan, his hands resting on his hips as the water ran down their bodies. But then his stomach gave a twist and he suddenly felt hungry again. It was way past his usual lunch time and even though he didn’t think he could eat anything before, didn’t feel like eating still, his body demanded food. “Should we go check the fridge and see if there’s anything edible in it?” he asked, unwrapping his body from his lovers. The sudden wave of cold air that hit his body, as he left the stream of hot water, made him shiver and he quickly searched for the towels, passing one to Ethan over his shoulder.

[-Hideki-]

Feeling cute Aaron relax against him like this, hearing his gasps and erotic moan when the water was brushing over his glans was making heat stream through him gathering and throwing a party in his groin area and before he asked the other whether he’d wash him too or if he was too tired for it he kissed him greedily and wildly as if he was starving but he couldn’t help it. One couldn’t possibly blame him though, Wilson was gorgeous, he was making those erotic noises and Ethan was still after all hopelessly in love with him. After he then had asked the man about being washed by him in return it seemed for a moment that the other man was thinking about it and the red head was almost about to grab the shower gel and clean himself when his sexy nerdy librarian spoke to him in a teasing manner, taking the shower gel, telling him that he’d wash him but only because it was him.

 

“Lucky me for being me then!” the ginger stated, a wide smirk on his face as he looked into those blue eyes anticipating the man to touch and wash him. He wanted those hands to roam over his body, wanted to feel the other man’s affection through this. And the silver haired indeed seemed to like touching him as well as he wasn’t rushing it and didn’t seem just eager to get it over with. His hands started out with his arm and while the man was applying the shower gel he could feel that the other was massaging Cornwell’s muscles. It felt nice and the ginger was relaxing through it. But it was when he was almost ordered to turn around and complied and those hands were starting to massage his uptight, hard neck that he was really feeling it. Ethan’s neck and back were prone to muscle tenseness and they sometimes even outright hurt after a long day sitting on a chair in the office. He tried to work against it in the gym but it didn’t completely rid him off those issues. If he had the time he went to get full body massages at the local physiotherapist but he had neglected that since how many months now? Hence when Aaron was pressing onto those spots the man let out a deep groan. “Do it more! Harder! A lot harder!” the ginger said in a strained voice wanting the man to use more of his strength to knead his tense muscles and to make them flexible and all smooth again. Fuck he loved guys massaging him! His physiotherapist was lovely and knew her shit and all but she just didn’t have that firm and strong grip of another man and no matter how many times he had told the woman to mangle him properly she was even too hesitant and cautious to do so.

 

There was almost disappointment in him when Aaron abandoned his neck and back and he felt those hands travelling down and reaching his arse making him want them to go back up to his back again because his arse was fine and needed no massage, although he sometimes even felt he needed that after sitting so long on it that his arse-cheeks felt numb. The man’s hands didn’t go up again, instead they want forward, slid over his hip and then…. somewhere into nether land, somewhere around his dick without touching it, teasing him. And it worked. Feeling the man’s hands roam around that area always only almost touching his cock was making it prickle within him and was making him anticipate proper touch and was arousing him. He inhaled deeply through his nose and leaned his head back against Aaron, his hand reaching behind for the other’s neck. “Bloody monster!” he playfully called him with a grin and let his tongue touch the man’s earlobe, slightly biting down on it.

 

Finally then he felt those hands on his manhood, the other washing under his balls and giving his cock the same treatment the ginger had given the other’s before and the ginger could feel those sparks, those sparks of pleasure starting to form and his body was getting slightly heated, blood getting pumped into his dick, getting hard in Aaron’s hands that were cleaning him down there, slight gasps escaping him when his foreskin was pulled away and he was washed under it. When the treatment ended it left Ethan with a semi-hard penis and arousal rushing through him. “See. That’s your fault.” He breathed a little heated when the other man just leaned against him like that. “Because you’re such a hot mess of a bloody tease.” The man added craving the man to let those hands slide further down and back to his dick again instead of resting on his hips.

 

Hearing the librarian ask whether they should go and check what was in the fridge now, retreating from him made the ginger grin although his cock was protesting. “Sure.” He said. “Let me just wash my hair real quick.” The ginger stated when Aaron left the shower. Ethan put some shampoo onto his head, rubbed it in and let the shower clean it out again quickly, turned the shower off and stepped out as well, feeling cold without the water and feeling the air against his hot, soaked body. He took the towel that was given to him, dried his hair, then his body, took another towel to wrap around his waist, covering up his semi-erect cock, pressing a kiss towards Aaron’s cheek leaving for the kitchen.

 

Since his stomach was rumbling again he was really quick to stick his head completely into the fridge digging himself through all the stuff that was in it, opening every cupboard in the entire kitchen, putting some useful ingredients together. “I’m gonna make a chilli!” he decided since there was everything needed for it in the house and it wasn’t that difficult to make nor did it take long. He didn’t even wait for a reaction but just got to it, preparing the chilli for the two of them, rummaging in the kitchen. When the chilli was left to boil the red head went back to where he had dropped his pants to get his cigarettes, then back into the kitchen, opened the window wide, cold wind blowing into his face and against his naked torso, making goosebumps appear on his skin, not keeping him from leaning his upper body out to smoke so that the smoke wouldn’t be in Aaron’s apartment.

 

Inhaling deeply his hazel eyes were staring outside as he leaned at the window, his heart racing, feeling flutters in his stomach, his cock not really calming down because he was constantly thinking about Aaron and how the man had looked when they had had sex, the noises he had made, then his hot body under the shower. It was still somewhat surreal but although he was telling himself that it was uncertain and most definitely still fragile at this point, not exactly solid yet he felt excited and happy about this development. He couldn’t help it. The way Aaron had looked at him, half annoyed, half amused before he had kissed him again and told him that he should be happy that this nerdy librarian digged him, actually literally expressing that he did dig him, then the other telling him that he hadn’t been to rough per-se but that he wasn’t yet used to it talking about having sex again, this not being a onetime thing, the other not seeing this as a mistake he had made and last but definitely not least him saying that he liked sex best with Ethan, that he had liked it more than with any of those chicks. That had made him smile wider than the Cheshire cat, it had made him more happy than a kid on Christmas Eve and only thinking about it made the man smirk ever so widely and satisfied and even a little smug maybe. But hey, his first love he had always deemed hopelessly one sided wanted to be with him and had just told him that he enjoyed sex the most with him, more than with anyone before. He just hoped the other would come to terms with his feelings, would see that he loved him and would be able to stand by their relationship and wouldn’t be trying to keep it secret or to start denying it in front of his friends and other people.

Thinking about that made him sigh deeply. He wanted to claim Aaron and he wanted Aaron to claim him but … Aaron had freaked out about it prior what had even led to them having fucked now in the first place to take the fight out in the bedroom.