16+ Crimson Snow

[Saga]

Summary: Friendship is bound to betrayal. Love is bound to pain. A group of friends, can they survive the hardship of life?

Status: Discontinued

People say I should go become a writer, heh. Other say I should go do singing, third part says I should go use my imagination for the rage. To be honest, I just want to switch between all of them. I don't want to be put between some borders,but to go beyond them.

Enjoy the novel,in advance - sorry if there are mistakes - I am not fluent in English...yet. (:

 

I'll name the protagonist Shinji Aoyama,being in his last year in high-school. Let's follow his unique personality mistaken sometimes for bi-polarity. Text which is marked in blue is actually the writer(me) giving details or,as I call it, unique effects. You will understand what I meant.

 

-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-

 

CHAPTER 1

 

Early in the morning,fall terms has started,Shinji was on his way to the student council meeting. He wore his school's uniform, in one hand a few documents found their embrace in Aoyama's grip.

 

"Ah,three hours was it?Damn, the afternoon is so far.", the male sighed disappointed of the fact he had to be away from his friends. Actually he was always surrounded by many people, but he considered a few for his fellows. As soon the door was in front of him,he reached for the knob and opened it.

 

There were around ten people in the room. All of them got up and bowed lightly.

-"Good morning, President.",in one voice,they greeted the boy.

-"Morning.",he bowed his chin lightly as an answer to the bowing.

 

Shinji had many activities in his list, he enjoyed his busy life out for one single reason. He didn't want to think of things that could bring his spirit down. As much work he had so much he was cheerful though, he was tired, he didn't complain.

 

He was that kind of a person, a complicated type. His personality was pretty colorful and immense for a simple understanding. If there was a part of him that knew the world would end tomorrow, nothing would stop him to plant apple seeds today - The fruit of hope. Yet, the lightness was always followed by darkness. He disliked the world at the same time. Why would he like a place, where people believed that God judged them all rightfully? Even when children die? Was it a judgment as well, or just a bad luck? Other even tried to call themselves 'God', what a foolishness.

 

-"Yes, with that everything is clear, I hope. I dismiss the meeting for today.", Shinji was on his president's chair, his elbows set on the desk and his fingers curled around each other for a bed of his chin.

-"We did a hard work today, thank you all.", said his right hand and bowed.

 

All of the student council group left the cabinet,with that Amano and Aoyama were alone.

-"Senpai,about tomorrow, shouldn't we change some rules and inform the director?",Amano turned to Shinji with his small eyes,narrowed at the president.

-"Seems changing rules is your specialty,Amano. What rules you want to change this time?", Aoyama knew the male's personality. He was the kind of a man who always wanted the spot-light. And,so,Shinji gave what he wanted. Just sometimes he went beyond it,then Aoyama would stop this selfishness and avidity.

-"It's about class 'D',your year."

 

Shinji knew that certain class. Yes, his fellows were from there, he didn't hide the fact actually. Just many people saw it wrong for the President to hang out with a group of idiots. Or, so they called class 'D'.

 

-"What about class 'D'?" ,he lifted a brow and glanced over the "fox".

-"Well, even on their first day,they didn't wear school uniforms, they always break our rules. Shouldn't we put a special rule on them? Something like a-...",Shinji cut off the talk, he got slightly annoyed.

 

To piss Aoyama off, you needed special skills. Yes, he would raise his tone, or would glare, but to really piss him off to the point of darting his "sharp tongue" at you, or even raise his hand at you - you really had to have special skills.

 

-"We treat everyone equal. If there is a special rule for class 'D', then I am afraid we have to make a special rule for the rest as well.",he grinned as if he was threatening the other, but his voice was pretty calm,"Am I wrong,Amano?".

 

-"I understand. Please,let them know they should follow the rules,then.", a little hint of "after all, they are your friends" could be felt from the way Amano said that.

 

Gladly,everything was settled. The meeting was over and Shinji could skip his classes today. On a days when the student council had a meeting,every single of them could go home as a reward for the hard work.

 

Aoyama picked his coat from the desk and put it on, without buttoning it. He glanced over the window. When he was alone in the cabinet, he liked to gaze at the beautiful sight from above. The school's yard seemed so beautiful.

 

A deep sigh was exhaled from Shinj's lips. He placed his hands in each pocket and headed for the roof. His black eyes were glittering with excitement. What a nice weather,what a nice day, he would have fun. The boy made his way up to the roof and opened the door for the place.

 

Fresh wind ruffled slightly his hair,he smiled lightly and stepped forward to close the door behind. As if, he shut the dirty world aside ad kept these were five people there,as pure as he could. He raised his hand,the other stayed in his pocket. The wind played with his unbuttoned coat,the shirt's hem lifted lightly from the windy freshness.

-"Yo!",he greeted cheerfully.

 

These five people turned around and every single of them smiled.

-"Oh,man!You took your time!",a boy from the group said and ran toward Shinji to tackle him down. They both laughed as the fell down.

-"Idiots..", a girl rolled her eyes,but was smiling,"You are late,Shin!",she placed her hands on each side of her hips,as if, was scolding him.

-"Let's make him treat us a dinner today!",another boy peeked from behind the girl,laughing at Shinji being tackled from Nao.

 

-"What?",Aoyama frowned and pushed Nao away,"Man,you are frigging heavy!", but as soon as he tried to get up on his knees, he was tackled again - it was another girl.

-"Shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiin!",she was so happy to see the boy that she flopped him down again.

-"I'm honestly thinking of murdering you all.",of course Aoyama was joking.

 

-"It's decided. Aoyama buys us ramen today.",Ryuichi,the fifth person grinned,while he was leaning against the fence. He was considered for a close friend of Shinji. Yes, all of them were his friend, and he was their friend. But,somehow, these two seemed close.

 

-"Ah.",Aoyama ran a hand through his hair,closing eyes. He laughed as he stood down on the ground. It was nice being with them. Yes, "them",the students from class 'D',"You were here, Ryu? I didn't notice.", jokingly Shinji teased.

-"Excuse me for not being so popular,Mr. President.", the boy teased back, chuckling lightly.

-"Here they go again.",Ayumi rolled her eyes,getting off Shinji to let the boy sit up.

 

Aoyama liked class 'D'. They weren't idiots, not at all. One of the reason he hated people, they always judged. Why judging when for one the wrong is the right for other and vice versa? He treasured his time with them, neither of the them knew that Aoyama would leave abroad very soon. The boy had to tell them,but not yet.

 

+Not yet+

 

I am not afraid,not yet.

I would go spend my time with you

not waste it, not yet.

 

Laughter similar to cry,

why would you want to die?

You have what to fight for,

stand up bring it forth.

 

I am not afraid, not yet.

I would go spend my time with you

not waste it,not yet.

 

If you want to know

what do you mean for me,

do not follow me,

I will not lead you.

 

I am not afraid, not yet.

I would go spend my time with you

not waste it,not yet.

 

If you want to know

what do you mean for me

do not walk ahead of me,

I will not follow your selfishness.

 

I am not afraid, not yet.

I would go spend my time with you

not waste it,not yet.

 

If you want to know

what do you mean for me,

walk right beside me,

because what I call a friendship

is not what you call a leadership.

 

I am not afraid, not yet.

I would go spend my time with you

not waste it,not yet.

 

Cry similar to laughter,

you are my shelter.

You,do not forget me.

Not yet.

[Bloodysadist]

Omo...Its really good story :X You surprised me again XD ^^

 

I hope that you'll post the next Chapter soon XDD

[Matti_19]

I like your story.. and I like your unique effects as well!

I agree with Blodysadist, I also hope you'll post the next chapter soon!

[Saga]

Thank you. (:

I will continue it. (:

[BRIDGET]

I really don't know if you should be a writer, a singer, a photographer or a painter. i'm sure you've got talent for anything you want to do. I've already told you how much I enjoy the things you write...

[Saga]

CHAPTER 2

 

::Alarm's ringing::

 

A hand stretched forward and made an u-turn to caress fingers through that medium length black hair. It was already morning?

-"Tsk..",the sound of a clicked tongue into an unsatisfied sign volumed his mouth. His black eyes darted a glare at the ringing object next to his bed. The male reached a hand and his finger pushed the turn-off button. The next what followed was a sigh.

 

Name: Shinji

Surname: Aoyama

Hometown: Kyoto

Current location: Tokyo

Age: 26 years old

Occupation: Author during the night and editor during the day

By-name: Tetsuya Katsu

Status: Single

Eyes color: Black

Hair color: Black

Favorite flower: Iris ( The flower of loyalty)

Often used quote: 'Who knows...'

 

Aoyama's wide back stretched the coat as he put it on himself,he was ready to go out to work. His style was nothing elegant, rather free-minded into the fashion choice of clothes. Under his gray coat, which he never bothered buttoning, he wore a white T-shirt engraved with a black crown that was pierced by a few roses' thorns. For his bottom,he wore a black pair of jeans that had chains on the side,curling around each others and hanging downwards to his thigh's level.

 

He wasn't the type to keep his hair strictly sleeked either. Since he had his hair a little longer that the normal boy's length for hair, he preferred to have it slightly messy - just a little wax to put it into a nice hairstyle.So,after the morning shower,he dressed up and got into his shoes,taking his keys for the car he had.

 

How long has it been since that day?

Shinji frowned a little and shook the thought off. He had a life now. Working, even overworking himself in order to keep his cool. Was it like that even when he was alone? - Yes, always. The male didn't allow himself to sink deeper into the darkness. He had enough.

 

The young editor,or so he was right now,during the day, closed the door behind and found quickly a cancer stick between his lips. Shinji ignited the cigarette and shoved his hands into each of his pockets, heading for downstairs to his car.

 

Even though the male didn't care,he was quite famous. As an author, he was one of the best selling ones right now; as an editor in chief,he did a great job, leveling-up the company's image into the manga's industry; and,of course, popular as a male. Was it for his unique style and the fresh fragrance of his that all women turned around to steal a peek of his firm and tall figure? Or, was it because of his superior aura and the cool image he had that all men found him as an idol? Either way, that fact was pointless when you had an innate hatred for everyone.

 

Driving the highway, Shinji laughed a little. His hand skimmed against the steering-wheel to make a turn to the right. If it was so easy to make turns in your life, it would be wonderful - Aoyama thought. There,the red light stopped him from resuming his way straight. So in life, there is always a red-light that stopped us,more or less, we always have to make a pause. The male gritted his teeth, his black eyes gazing forward, yet hidden under the black sunglasses. He hated to stop and there was a reason. If he stopped, he wasn't sure he'd be able to keep moving on - No way in hell for him to stop right now. As soon as the green lighted for the drivers, he stepped on the gas and kept his gaze somewhere further that it could reach.

 

+Somewhere further+

 

My life would be pointless,

if I had everything.

My life would be an emptiness,

if I had nothing.

Grab on me,

let's go beyond it- Somewhere further.

 

I can't promise you

I love you.

I can't speak it out

I love you.

I - You, too far away

like the south and north way.

 

My life would be pointless,

if I had everything.

My life would be an emptiness,

if I had nothing.

Grab on me,

let's go beyond it- Somewhere further.

 

And now,

when everything has been lost,

what was left behind?

You - I, too close,no way.

Risking it, please, stay away.

 

My life would be pointless,

if I had everything.

My life would be an emptiness,

if I had nothing.

Grab on me,

let's go beyond it- Somewhere further.

 

Was it too early?

Was it already too late

for me to stop you?

Between you and me,

please tell me,I am the one who betrayed.

Somewhere further- Let me believe.

 

My life would be pointless,

if I had everything.

My life would be an emptiness,

if I had nothing.

Grab on me,

let's go beyond it- Somewhere further.

 

Let me believe that I first betrayed.

Yet... why am I not satisfied, yet?

Somewhere further,stay away

I want to believe.

[Matti_19]

The story is so good! I like your style of writing.

[Saga]

Thank you,Mat. (:

I've got something in my sleeves, hope I can write it out.

[Rei]

Very good story! I like it and ok, hope u can write what u've got in the sleeve

[Bloodysadist]

Ah,such an interesting story,I really like it ^^

[BRIDGET]

Like the first drops of an early rain, I'm just waiting with expectation the rest to come...

Thanks....

[Saga]

Thank you all for reading it. (: Here,hope you enjoy the third chapter. Once again,sorry,if my English seems screwy to you. =/

--------------

 

CHAPTER 3

 

It was around eight o'clock at the morning when Shinji arrived at the company. On his way up to the manga department,he met a co-worker and may be the only one he trusted - Ayumi.

Yes,the same Ayumi from his high-school. She worked at the same tribe as him,just a different department.

-"Shin!",she called him from behind,all eyes on her.

 

People wondered how she was able to approach the man. He wasn't a scary-face,but somehow this stay-away atmosphere around him kept people admiring him from afar.

 

Aoyama glanced over his shoulder, lightly turning his torso at her direction. Like always,his hands in pockets to take out his right hand and take off his sunglasses. Although the blackness of his irises, his eyes were quite deep and strong.

-"The director wants to meet you. He said to pass this to you as soon as you get in the firm.",she smiled brightly,handing him a few documents.

 

Shinji took them,he nodded and thanked her. He eyed the capital letters on the pack,saying "NEW SUPPLEMENT".

-"What is it about?",he asked though,he rarely was curious about whatever it was.

-"I don't know. I haven't opened,but there are rumors that a few people from anime department applied for your department.",they both kept walking towards the office,chatting about various things.

 

The whispers from the employees didn't bother them. People were like that,talking,period. Always curious for the bad or the good - it never ended good. At least, they stayed away from Aoyama. And he was content, he didn't ask for anything else - Just don't come into his private space.

 

When they had to separate their ways, Ayumi offered him to go out for a drink tonight,of course, Aoyama couldn't reject her offer. It wasn't because he was too kind to her, or out of the-good-old-times. He owed her a lot. She was the only one who knew everything about Shinji. Of course you'd try to to protect the only thing that was left for you.

 

::Knock,knock::

 

His knuckles drummed in two following one after another knocks against the director's door. Aoyama was calm and composed, actually he was in good terms with his chief. He didn't worried about being called.

-"Come in.",a voice said from inside.

When Shinji opened the door,his eyes met these of the president. - What he did expect now was two long hours in the office. The man liked to talk,so Shin closed the door to get as soon as possible to the point.

 

-"I assume you heard about the rumors,Aoyama.", the director asked and glanced over the documents in Shinji's hand.

-"I did."

-"So, we'll hold an interview for new manga editors. As an editor in chief, you have to be part of the selection committee.", the man was glad he could go in brief without explaining everything in details. He liked talking,but not when it came to work.

 

:: Dropped books on the floor::

 

-"What the heck! Watch your steps,idiot!",a man was about to raise his hand at this fragile figure that curled a little in fear,everything was just because the girl didn't see him coming and bumped into him on the ground floor.

-"And I should say "What the heck is a man doing to someone helpless"?",another male's voice echoed from side,watching the situation.

 

Name: Toya

Surname: Mizuki

Age: 24 years old

Hometown: Tokyo

Current location: Tokyo

Occupation: Editor in chief of the anime's department

By-name: T.M.

Status: Single

Eyes color: Green

Hair color: Red

Favorite flower: White lily ( The pure flower)

Often used quote: 'Serves you right...'

 

Everyone looked the male's direction. He was pretty similar to someone else they all knew. His hair slightly messy,but fixed with a handful of wax. Under the glasses,which he wore for the style,a red eyebrow raised.

-"Let go of her.",he made a step forward to lean down and pick up a book from the ground. He wasn't joking. His voice was pretty lowered for it being a joke.

 

The male didn't have the guts to confront him,so he released her,cursing to find his way out the company.

The girl turned to him and bowed.

-"Thank you very much!",she was really scared,but now she was even more scared. What if the other who saved her was a jerk and find it annoying to hold this book?

-"Hehe!",he smiled brightly and all the scary aura was gone, one hand scratching behind head.

 

What the heck?

The girl raised her gaze up to see a boy that looked more innocent than a kid.

-"I am Mizuki Toya! From the anime department.",he introduced himself,reaching hand forward.

-"Huh?", the woman just dozed into the smile,but finally came to reality and reached for his to handshake it.

-"I am Ayumi Inoue!",she smiled and sighed in relief. Thanks god that he wasn't like Shinji.

"Wait,why am I referring him to Aoyama?",she blinked,but heard the rest of the male's speech.

-"I am here to meet the editor in chief of the manga's department. Where can I find him?",the boy seemed pretty ignorant about Aoyama's way of working. He never met in person any other than the director and those who worked with him - a few other editors,that included Ayumi as well. Probably because she had kind of a privilege,but anyway, she was surprised.

 

-"Aoyama? I'll show you the way."

"Wouldn't it be interesting to meet these two?",she grinned widely and leaded the boy to Shin's office.

[BRIDGET]

I'm wondering why the flower are important for the character. They reflect a part his/her personality?

Sorry if I'm too curious....

I liked it so far....

[Saga]

Yes and no, ahahaha. There is a meaning to it,one except being part of a hint for their personalities, you'll get to know it later. (:

[BRIDGET]

Yes and no, ahahaha. There is a meaning to it,one except being part of a hint for their personalities, you'll get to know it later. (:

 

Ok I'll wait like a good girl....

[Matti_19]

Thanks for the 3rd chapter! And your English is very good, what are you talking about?

The story is really enjoyable.

[Bloodysadist]

Toya,huh? XDD

 

I can smell the love from here XDD (I mean in the story) XDD

 

Oh and I hope that you'll post soon again.

[Saga]

Heh, thank you all.

And Mat, it's about being fluent. Heh. (:

[Saga]

CHAPTER 4

 

Two fingers, an index and a thumb reached up to massage lightly the base of his nose. He was tired,although it wasn't noon yet. Damn this president, he liked to talk to Shinji. Why he had to listen to a dozen of funny stories to kill the president's time?

 

-"Mama,mama,mama! Look,I made th-",a little kid bumped into Aoyama. His torso bent a little from the hit of the kid's head against his abdomen.

The male frowned and looked down.

The little kid made the kind of puppy eyes,asking for a forgiveness voicelessly.

-"Oh,my! Natsume!",an employee ran towards them, seemed it was the mother of this kid.

-"I am terribly sorry about this, Mr. Aoyama! I,I really am!",she bowed a few times and he waved hand slightly to side,as if saying who-cares-just-keep-IT-away-from-me.

 

As soon as the mother grabbed the kid by the ear's tip to scold him on the end of the corridor,Shinji headed for his office. But something made him turn gaze over for a last look at the family.

-"But mum!",the kid sulked.

-"No 'but',Natsume. I am worried about you, don't go and pull the Devil's tail,dear.",she held him into an embrace,smiling.

"

-"Hey,Shin.",his hair waving to side as the wind found its way through the blackness of his hair strands. It was slightly long, beautiful under the moon's light.

-"M?",Aoyama was smoking while leaning against the pole of some street lamp.

He loved to hang out during the night with his friends,especially with Ryuichi.

-"If you had kids,would you spend your time with them or give your all to your work?",a sad tune found in Ryu's voice,while asking Shinji. His gaze kept watching the moon. A very deep and sad gaze, that made Aoyama look up as well.

-"Who knows. Pro'lly would spend as much time as I could with them.",he wasn't sure what to answer,yet he could feel the current situation,calling for a smartish answer. But he couldn't give it. He never had something that he could call a family,so he was used to it. As for Ryuichi...

The boy chuckled sadly,his pain numbing the reality from feeling as an illusion.

-"I would spend my whole life with my wife and my kids. I would care for them. I wouldn't allow to my woman to be alone....",he looked over the near park where a few mothers were staying late to watch over their children playing,"....I wouldn't let my kid feel all..alone..",his eyes fell into darkness.

 

Aoyama lowered his glance from the high and unreachable sky down to Ryu's sad expression.

-"Heh.",he smiled and got his back away from the pole to walk over Ryuichi,his hand got away from his pocket and ruffled Ryu's hair,"I am sure you'll be an awesome dad,Ryu."

Not even a drop of sarcasm could be found in these lines. Aoyama knew the feeling of being alone,even if no one around him recognized the pain inside,he knew it well. So,the words were pure and sincere. Sincere as his heart was,even if it knew the color of Hell,even if it was crashed, it still could beat,it still could make him breathe.

 

Both of them laughed and started teasing each other with slight punches on their way back to home......

 

-"SHIN!!",Ryu called him from the corner of the street when they separated,"I AM SURE! I AM SURE THAT YOU WILL BE AN AWESOME FATHER AS WELL!",the words made Shin widen eyes with his back turned at Ryu.

 

"

 

Aoyama closed his eyes and turned away from the mother hugging all alone the kid.

-"That's why I hate kids.", he growled in his mind and finally got his steps faster to his office.

Why he hated kids? Was it because they were so pure? Was it because they were helpless and weak, or was it because they reminded him.....they definitely did remind him... But why?

 

Finally in his office,he closed the door behind and kicked the chair on his way to get a seat.

-"Damn this week as well.",he mumbled and put hands behind nape.

-"It's not good to let down your guard before your foe, do you know the saying, Mr. Aoyama?", from the sofa in Shinji's office a voice said.

 

Shin shifted his eyes to the corners to eye the male. He sighed out a faint chuckle.

-"It's not good to sneak in my private space, or you don't know the rumors,Mr. Mizuki?",he never talked to the editor in chief from the anime's department. But he knew him well, or from other people's talk and on the meetings he had seen him before.

-"Should I believe the rumors,then?",Toya grinned and got up from the sofa to sit,leaning back.

-"Celebrities are born from rumors, don't you know?",a small and quick push,the chair of Shinji turned to face Mizuki.

 

They hated each other,actually,they were like meeting a cat with a dog. But people always found them for being pretty similar when it came to seriousness. Then...what was the difference between these two?

 

+The difference+

 

If you knew how much I loved

If I knew how much you wanted love.

Why the time played its role?

Why it set the difference?

 

If everything I had was an illusion,

I'll tell you what was a reality.

Praying? Smiles? Pain? Get a gain, it's just a game.

Stop it, I am not into you for the fame.

 

If you knew how much I loved

If I knew how much you wanted love.

Why the time played its role?

Why it set the difference?

 

Say, why should I be strong?

Babe, you got it all wrong.

Right me,then.

Burn me, just don't make me wait for too long.

 

If you knew how much I loved

If I knew how much you wanted love.

Why the time played its role?

Why it set the difference?

 

Stay there, I won't let you fall.

Yeah, empty talk.

Let me love you,I am not that folk.

Probably, you are just my ego's stroke.

 

If you knew how much I loved

If I knew how much you wanted love.

Why the time played its role?

Why it set the difference?

[BRIDGET]

the blue part, the best

you know I'm always wondering, muli-voice poem???

bad writer.... mmm...

[Saga]

Ahahah, yes, a multi-voice one.

No idea if it's good. Just came up with that. ;D

 

(: Well,y ou know why I started writing this novel . ; )

[BRIDGET]

Ahahah, yes, a multi-voice one.

No idea if it's good. Just came up with that. ;D

 

(: Well,y ou know why I started writing this novel . ; )

 

it doesn't suit your image to be so humble, hehehe kidding :leaf4:

yeah the blue part is the best, I liked it very much, images came to my mind & it is sad but warm

leaf3

[Saga]

Yeah,this is one of the parts you need to understand my 'Let's meet again' . ( ;

[Belita]

The story itself, the way it's written... pushes you into it...

I've been loving it since the beginning, definitely

 

You are an awsome writer, please do keep it up

[Saga]

Thank you,Bel! (: It's my first time trying to write a fiction in English. ;D

___________________

CHAPTER 5

 

-"So,may I know why you are here, Mizuki?",Aoyama frowned, his brows slightly hidden under his hair.

-"Why so formal?",the male grinned at Shinji and got up to walk over the desk on which Aoyama had his elbow set.

-"What do you mean?", it, indeed, asked for an explanation.

-"Well,a minute ago,you were cursing so freely. I thought I could see more of that side?",the editor in chief from anime department chuckled and reached the desk to skim fingertips against the glacial surface.

 

Shinji followed the movement from the periphery of his eyes' corners.

-"You have quite the imagination, Mizuki. I am nothing more than you can see.",he didn't hesitate in his reply. Why would he? The male didn't even think anything special of himself, yet, he didn't think the rest were anything special to allow them be near him. Fact,they all were humans. What was so special in human beings? - Nothing at all.

-"If I lack imagination, I wouldn't be the editor in chief of anime department,you know?",these green eyes darted a gaze at Shin. Piercing him...not. Why it was so hard to see through this man? Toya frowned. He never had a difficulty with seeing through people.

 

-"Hah, seem you lack something else, then.", a rude line came up. But, that was Toya hoping for. He wanted to show Shin himself, that he wasn't the one he thought of being. He wanted to strip up the male. Mizuki had both, a hatred and some admiration towards Aoyama.

 

-"I do? What is it?",he bent slightly forward, being curious.

Aoyama lifted his chin up to glance at him. His black eyes firm and cold as always.

-"Reality. You lack a sense of reality."

-"Pretty harsh, Aoyama. But,tell me, what is it a reality for you?",green eyes didn't sink into the blackness of Shin's ones. They rather brightened them.

 

Shinji lowered his head. Again. Why people bothered with him? He didn't want anything from the world. He just wanted to be alone. Where the world was when he wanted to be alone not... Now, he recalled something from back then. From his high-school life. A boy that used to hang out with them,with Shin and his folks. A boy that seemed so naive, yet so hungry and in a need for Aoyama's attention. Yes,to the point of hurting Shin, and even his friends.

"

Leaning against the school's fence,late afternoon, the moon was on its way to embrace the city,Aoyama lit a cigarette. He used to smoke a lot in his teen years,even though,he didn't bother hiding the fact he was a smoker,his friends always covered him. Being the School Council Pres. wasn't easy,but back then, Shinji had a lot of going on. As much as he needed to escape from the reality,so much he got deeper into it. His family was broken. Being thrown and unwanted,was it from the time when he was born? Either way,he didn't want to think about it. His eyes slid close.

 

-"Dude, I am telling you, this isn't the thing I want to be in future! I want to become a doctor!",Nao was disagreeing again.

-"Gosh,tell it to your mother,then!",Ayumi frowned and lit a cigarette.

-"Dreams are to be pursued! Hello,everyone!",this boy appeared. All smiling when he saw Aoyama. He clang to him a lot. Nothing could get him depressed except Shinji's ignores and harsh words.

 

Everyone greeted him,but why Aoyama didn't? Was he asleep? He had his eyes closed,the cigarette between his lips didn't give an impression of being smoked away,but just for the badass' image.

-"Shin?",they all turned to him,blinking.

 

-"Dreams,huh?",Aoyama spoke up,his eyes still closed. He didn't really follow the conversation,but he clearly heard the loud boy coming and greeting.

-"Yeah!Dreams!",the boy,Dai,smiled widely.

-"Dreams...",Shinji repeated again,but his voice became hardly audible. He got his back away from the fence and opened eyes to look over Dai,"Do you have dreams?"

 

He asked Dai baldly and got his cigarette out of his mouth. If Dai was all happy because it was the first time Shinji asked him something,or rather turned his attention to him, Aoyama was pissed off right now.What was the thing that upset him?

 

-"I do! I want to make cars! To work in Toyota's company!",he was all excited,but seeing Aoyama's stiff expression,it washed his smile away.

-"Heeee,say Dai, am I your friend?",out of the blue, Shin asked.

-"Shin...",Ayumi and Ryuichi mumbled to stop the male,but he didn't hear them.

-"Of course! We are friends!",Dai confirmed.. But how foolish was one, thinking that everything was fine - in reality, everything was wrong.

-"Oh,really?",Shinji stepped forward and threw his cigarette to side. The moon reflecting in his black eyes, it could be read as a lost soul glittering for a help.

-"Y-yes?",the boy stuttered, he didn't know that Shin hated the word 'friends'. And even if he recognized a few for his folks, he never called them friends.

-"Then,let me tell you something.",he leaned forward and reached an ear to say it clearly. His eyes stared forward,not seeing anything at all, just sinking in pain - altogether with his spoken words,"We aren't friends. Would you choose me over your dream? If I had a dream and you were on my way to fillful it....",he paused and turned eyes at the boy's neck direction,"...I'd destroy you 'till you are a bare nothing. I'd crash you and grab onto the dream,but then.... Tell me,would it be the same dream I've been dreaming of?"

 

Aoyama stabbed with each of his words the boy's heart. Even the ones that were only listeners got slightly sad. Was that the real Shinji? Everything fell into silence. Aoyama passed by them,he turned his back, closing eyes. Why he always closed his eyes? A habit of protecting himself from the truth? They all would betray him,sooner or later. He was sure.

 

"

-"Tell me,Mizuki...",Shinji kept his gaze down,making Toya get his attention on these words,"...if you had a dream,would you destroy me to get your hands on it? "

Toya tilted his head to side,he wanted to see the male's expression,but no use. He shrugged and looked away.

-"We ain't friends,anyway. Why would I give a second thought?"

 

Shinji chuckled. It was true. They weren't friends to begin with.

-"What if we were?",he asked.

Toya averted his eyes to his direction. What the other wanted to hear? What has gotten into him? Mizuki asked for a simple answer to 'what was a reality',then,what was the other talking about?

-"Impossible.",he rejected the thought of them,being friends,"But,if we were...I'd surely destroy it.",so he chose.

 

Shinji gritted teeth. Ah, it hurt. But, he knew well, there wasn't a single person who would give it all away for his sake. The boy was always both unwanted and wanted. How could everyone keep asking him out, wanting his love, asking for his heart...when he had it all destroyed from the lies of his close ones? He got up and turned to the door. He needed fresh air. He wanted to get away from his memories. Damn it all. Why it hurt so much? His hand reached for the door's grip. Black eyes were slightly watered,but no,not crying yet. He wouldn't cry. These were watered with hatred.

-"Indeed. I'd destroy it all. You and my dream,all at once. And,when the time for forgiveness comes, I'll ask you to create my dream of a true friendship.",Toya turned around,finishing his words.

 

Shinji's eyes widened. His heart stopped to resume its beating's rhythm. What the hell was the other talking? He never heard such an answer. The male chuckled, it was like a nice applying over his old wounds. He had a life, he had a life... He was a new person,why he forgot it all? Aoyama opened the door and closed it behind.

-"Hypocrite."