uruha Posted April 26, 2012 Share Posted April 26, 2012 hi guys i always trouble you guys but i have important Q i want to know if you are too young and do you married with some one that has age gap and do you think married in under age 24 or 23 is good rabbit0 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
diniasa Posted April 26, 2012 Share Posted April 26, 2012 I'm married at 21 with different gap 6 years. And for me, absolutely good Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kai. Posted April 26, 2012 Share Posted April 26, 2012 There isn't really an actual age that's best to get married at, everyone and every relationship is different. If you know in your heart and your gut that you are honestly happy with that person then I don’t think age should matter either for example my mother got married when she was 16 to my father who was 10 years older than her (O_o) but they didn’t care about what other people thought since they were wanting to spend the rest of their lives together and still they are one of the happiest couple that I've seen. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FuyuNoSemi_Fan Posted April 26, 2012 Share Posted April 26, 2012 Age shouldn't matter as long as you love each other, right I know a couple that married as soon as they graduated and they're still happy... If you love the person then things like age shouldn't matter Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
uruha Posted April 26, 2012 Author Share Posted April 26, 2012 really hmm im 18 you know he is between 10 til 15 years (but 15 years) older than me but even if i married with age gap but you know the most thing i cant bear that i dont know kids my problem with marry is child s i dont know about theme and i dont have very good relation ship with theme and i dont interested in kids rabbit1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jin. Posted April 26, 2012 Share Posted April 26, 2012 Love is love, but when its an arranged marriage with a guy who's 10 y. older then a girl from 15, just no, and further if its a marriage between two kids who are 15, I'm against it, why marrying that early? they don't even exactly know love. When its between an age of 17 and 25, still a bit doubting, but when its 18 and above, then its alright to marry in my opinion. Love is love, but you better can start living together before marrying, what if he's a total bastard after the marriage? sucks pretty much... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
uruha Posted April 26, 2012 Author Share Posted April 26, 2012 hhm actually im 18 he is 33 jin i mean he is 15 years older than me :hamtaro-005 (15): Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
uruha Posted April 26, 2012 Author Share Posted April 26, 2012 yeah but your right jin somehow i have to know him more and i dont interested in kids when i think of marry about child it walking on my nerve and i think i have theme i become Limited rabbit13 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yojichan Posted April 26, 2012 Share Posted April 26, 2012 Whether it's an arranged marriage or not, it pretty much carry a great amount of stress and happiness for two people provided they are consenting adults. An age gap can become a source of stress in relationship since the emotional and mental compatibility will always be pitted against each other. If none of the couple is going to relax and understand or be open to growth, the marriage will suffer. The way I am understanding this, you are married to a guy who is 15 years your senior and he has kids from a previous marriage? I understand that this is an arranged marriage. What was the purpose for this marriage in the first place? Are your families close? Were you made aware of the children before hand and have you expressed concern over this? What did they say? An arranged marriage despite its seemingly ominous word "ARRANGED" does not give either parties the sole option to say YES. You can still say No because this is your life you are talking about. In the end, either families are not the ones who are gonna be sleeping together or dealing with the everyday routine but just the couple themselves. Marriage whether arranged or not should not become a cage or a trap. Ask yourself how is your husband treating you? How are the kids treating you? Have you verbalized your concerns with your parents? Who arranged this marriage in the first place? Why did you feel that you had to agree. Were you threatened? I sure hope not. Was your family threatened? I sure hope not either. Do you love this man? If you cannot answer this simple question right away without even blinking then chances are, you gotta start thinking what exactly you want to do with your life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
uruha Posted April 26, 2012 Author Share Posted April 26, 2012 hmm you know some how i love that man but its not arranged married and that man is a single man and dont have any kids and 15 years older than me (im18 and he is 33) and kind but you know i just afraid of when i marry i will become mother i mean my own child s because i think i become Limited and because i dont love kids so much rabbit0 thanks guys your kind and always really helping me rabbit13 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FuyuNoSemi_Fan Posted April 26, 2012 Share Posted April 26, 2012 You should talk to him. If you don't want children yet then you should talk to him about it. Also 18 is to early to have children if you still want some freedome. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yojichan Posted April 26, 2012 Share Posted April 26, 2012 aaah! thanks for clearing that up. i am understanding it better now. well there you go, so you love him. grow from that love. to be honest, you have a very romantic age gap. i hope you two become happy and stronger through the years. there are no shortcuts to marriage or cure-alls. everything has to be learned through time and patience and with much dedication. as for the kids, your fears are valid. i'm sure a lot of women would feel the same way. i have friends who have been married for years and adore each other but the wife refuses to have kids because she feels she is not effective as a mom. Take your time. you're still so young. Focus on working together as a couple. Kids will come when you are both ready physically, mentally and emotionally. Do not be pressured by anyone into having kids. If you are not ready then just discuss it with your husband and try safe family planning methods that you can both agree. You have natural and artificial contraceptives. You can discuss this with your gynaecologist. When you're ready, you will just know it in your gut. If you are not ready, you will know it too. Relax okay? Keep praying and working for the best. I wish you both success. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
uruha Posted April 26, 2012 Author Share Posted April 26, 2012 thanks but still we are friend hmm you know then he become old they saying such good things he was really kind but now he is just gone without say anything i dont now maby because of his job yep your right im too young for this but anyway he says maby not soon but he want it he want family i want to know if i cant do this so i dont have wait for him to come back rabbit13 we still friends far friend he is not beside me so i want to decide and i just have years (2 or 3) because of my studys but it keeps my mind you guys can underestand i know it so happy i have you guys rabbit0 i pray also thanks so much Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marygrace94 Posted September 21, 2013 Share Posted September 21, 2013 hmm.. as long as you love each other, age is not really a question.. my classmates parents has an age gap pf 20 years..waah!!.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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